Capitol's Doll
by kmac13
Summary: AU Katniss is the sole victor of the 74th Hunger Games. Mulitple Katniss Pairings.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note: AU In this story there is no Peeta in the 74th games. Katniss is the sole victor. I know other people have placed Katniss with similar multiple pairings.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter One

My name is Katniss Everdeen, although, I haven't been her for a year now. I don't think I have truly been her since my father died when I was eleven. But now, I am definitely not her. I am the Capitol's newest plaything…This is my story.

It started soon after I won my games; the Seventy-Fourth Hunger Games.

"Miss Everdeen," President Snow had said, "I am so pleased that you are our newest victor." God his smell makes me sick, bloodied roses. He was standing in my room. I had just woken up from the games. When he saw I wasn't going to respond he continued; his voice sounded like poison to me, "Believe me when I say, I was betting on you my dear. I have great plans for you. I hope that you will cooperate with me as I would hate to have to _make_ you cooperate." His eyes narrowed and I knew what he meant. He wanted me to play his game or he would take measures to make sure I played it.

I nodded. I had nothing to say as I didn't know what game he wanted me to play. I thought when you won the games you were at least free, but I was sorely mistaken. He noticed that I was thinking and took this time to continue.

"You see, I have big plans for you, you will be very…. _profitable_ for me." His puffy lips forming an evil smirk. I looked at him with quizzical eyes trying to understand what he was saying. "I will sell you, to whoever I choose and whenever I choose. If you don't comply then your family; your sweet little sister, your mother, and even your 'cousins' will become… _deathly_ clumsy. Do you understand now?" He asked. I was sick. But I nodded my head in agreement. With that he walked away confidently, smiling.

Haymitch was the next to come see me. He was angry and panicked. He had been told he needed to wait until the President left. So when Snow walked away Haymitch, in all of his unkempt fury, came bounding in. Noticing that my face was an ashen green, he stopped his maddened steps and gently came by me. He knew though, he could see it on my face.

"What did he say Sweetheart?" he asked a little harshly, but still showing gentleness by placing my hair behind my ear.

"T-to t-t-tell me con-congratulations." I stuttered, just barely above a whisper.

"Oh, Sweetheart." He said with pity and anger in his voice all at the same time. Looking at me knowingly. He sat next to my bed tense and defeated; I'm not sure how he seemed so contradictory in appearance.

Later, when I was released back to my floor in the training center, I was greeted by a barrage of people: Cinna my stylist, the other tribute's stylist Portia, as well as Effie, Haymitch and a few other victors who I recognized, but had never met. The most surprising was Finnick Odair. _Why would he be there?_

Cinna quickly took me to my room to dress me before dinner. He is so kind and gentle and even though he is from the Capitol I still feel like I can trust him, he is my friend. He dressed me in a simple white dress and let my dark, long hair fall down my back. He had to make a few quick alterations to the dress as I had lost weight since I went into the arena, which would almost seem impossible as I was already underweight when I went in. Seeing how thin I was made me think about the games.

_My games were tough. I lost my only ally, a twelve year old girl named Rue who reminded me of my sister, when the boy from District One stabbed her through the stomach with his spear. Before he could even react to my presence I had shot him through the neck with an arrow. He was dead almost immediately. Rue was not dead yet. She asked me to sing to her and I did. It was one of the hardest things I had ever done. Then when her cannon sounded, I laid flowers all over her body. _

_After that I become almost hollow. I just wanted to hurry up and get the games over with. The boy tribute from my district died at the cornucopia. The Careers, the tributes from One, Two and Four, wanted me dead, because I out-shined them in the opening ceremonies, I had a better training score and people were lining up around the block to sponsor me after I had told them about why I volunteered to save my sister. _

_It came down to me verses Cato, the male tribute from Two. He slipped off the cornucopia when he lunged at me with his sword. He fell and was attacked for what felt like hours by the mutts. When the mutts finally left his dying, mangled body I killed him out of mercy. _

Cinna brought me back to reality when he noticed I was stiff and shaking. "Katniss are you alright?" the beautiful man asked gently as he grasped my hands and looked into my eyes. His eyes are really beautiful. They are a mixture of greens and gold that is only accentuated by the slight gold eyeliner he wears. His eyes are kind and caring.

"Yes." I finally exhaled, "I just must be hungry." I gave a weak smile. I could tell he knew I was lying, but he was too kind to make me say what he knew I was thinking about.

When we walked into the dinning room everyone stopped talking and turned to look at me. I felt self conscious. I felt hideous and everyone there was judging me. I wanted so badly to hide. I have never thought my self to be a beauty, but at that moment I felt even uglier. I am a monster now. I have killed innocent children.

Physically speaking, I look like I am from the Seam. I have olive skin, gray eyes, and dark hair. I am short for my age and underweight, probably because I was always hungry. I had some curves but was mostly muscular, due to all of the time I had spent hunting in the woods.

Effie came bouncing up; her voice so cheerful and high pitched its grating. "Oh Katniss, you look so lovely. I am so happy to be able to finally bring home a victor! I will definitely get a better district next year!" _How could she be so shallow and dense?_ I just gave her a polite smile and thanked her through gritted teeth, trying so hard not to make her cry… again, like on the train here. Haymitch could see my anger rising and told her to sit down and let everyone else get a look at the newest victor. I looked at him gratefully.

I knew at this point I should have been happy. I was alive and my family would never have to worry about starving again. But truthfully I was miserable. I was physically alive. I couldn't un-live what I had done, what I had seen. I made a deal with the devil himself to sell myself so my family would be safe. I wished I would have died in the arena. Haymitch could see it on my face just like I saw it on his, how he wished he hadn't made it out. We are so much alike it's scary.

At dinner everyone talked about how wonderful I was in the games and how they never knew what an amazing voice I had. I just nodded and smiled stiffly. I sipped the wine that was brought out to us. I was on my third glass when I finally broke. "What is so fucking great about winning? How was I wonderful? Who cares if my voice is amazing it's the reason why I was singing that was so horrific!" I blurted it out, anger and self loathing dripping off of me. I was shaking. Effie was mortified by my blatant lack of social graces. She left in a huff. Portia was a little taken aback, but seemed to give me an understanding nod before she got up to go. When Cinna got up, he placed his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. I was left with Haymitch and two other victors, Finnick Odair and Johanna Mason.

"Well did you get it out of your system now Sweetheart?" Haymitch asked sarcastically. But it's his eyes that kept me from leaping across the table and killing him. In his eyes he said, _"I know the feeling."_

"Yes." I retorted.

"Good then we," he motioned to Finnick and Johanna, "have some things we want to talk to you about." I gave him an annoyed quizzical look so he would continue. Johanna was smirking at my little outburst and my annoyed face. Haymitch continued "This had better be your last outburst in front of others. You can rant and rave all you want to me, but to others it can't happen." His voice was forceful.

"We know what it is like and we are here to help you if you want it. We are sort of like a twisted little family." Finnick jumped in. He was breathtaking and his voice purred.

"Yes definitely a twisted family." Johanna started with an eye roll, "You see we have drunkard here who was our victor mentor and we are all one big happy fucking family." Her body was tense.

"Haymitch… I am not sure I understand." I said quietly as though he was the only one in the room.

"When I won my games, I was given the same proposition as you and some other 'useful' victors. I turned it down, my family and love died two weeks later and I still had to give into his demands. It was a while until the next victor was propositioned, because most are not as sought-after and come out too scarred mentally or become quick morphling addicts before they even make it home." I looked at him, and then Finnick and then Johanna with shock and horror on my face.

"I am like you in more ways than one, Katniss, I was chosen and I agreed right away." Finnick said looking at me sincerely.

"I was like your drunken mentor." Johanna piped in, "I lost everything and was still forced to comply, I went a little crazy after my hundredth customer and I was not requested anymore. I wouldn't suggest this though, if I hadn't already lost everyone, I would have then."

I looked at all three of them for a minute trying to take it all in. I was going to go the way that Finnick did, my family will be safe, but they will despise me. They will think I became a whore by choice. The three older victors were looking back at me. I broke the silence. "What do you mean that Haymitch was your victor mentor?" I asked.

"He showed us the ropes, taught us some tricks for how to best please the Capitol." Finnick said looking over at Haymitch with a wink and smile.

"Who is going to help me?" I asked.

"Well, Sweetheart, seeing as how young you are I wasn't sure if I should, so I asked Finnick here to help you since he is closer in age." I looked at him a little madly. _Why would he think I would want some stranger to help me? What does age matter? Won't most of my clients be old?_ It's as if he could read my mind when he continued, "But I would happily help you if you would prefer." He then gave me a seductive smile and wink. I had never seen this side of Haymitch before.

"But I've never done anything before. Not even kiss." I choked out realizing I was going to have to have sex and soon.

This realization bothered me. I had never thought about kissing or boys before the games. I had been too concerned with surviving to care. Now I don't even get a choice. The three of them were staring at me in disbelief.

"What? What about the boy you hunt with? I thought you and he, you know?" Haymitch said trying to hold back a laugh. _What is his problem?_

"No. We are just best friends. He would never look at me that way." I said, "I don't think any one has." I looked down at my fidgeting hands in my lap.

Johanna at this point was cracking up. "What do you mean? You are sixteen years old and you have never kissed anyone. Dear lord how pathetic are you?" She cackled, "I mean that cousin of yours alone would be enough to make me commit incest."

"What cousin?" I asked now confused. Snow had mentioned my 'cousins' too.

"The boy you hunt with, they told everyone he was your cousin so people wouldn't think you had a boyfriend back home." Haymitch said, glaring at Johanna.

"Oh." I went back to looking at my hands in my lap. I was very aware that this conversation is not something I felt comfortable with.

Finnick was looking at me with a slightly confused and amused look on his face. "What do you mean he or anyone else would never look at you that way? Don't you know why you were 'Chosen'?" he asked. All of a sudden I realized I don't know why. Surely Glimmer would have made Snow a lot more money than I would. He saw the look of questioning go across my face. "Katniss you were chosen because you are beautiful in a way that the Capitol hasn't seen beauty before. You're not the generic beauty like Glimmer or Cashmere. You are a true beauty, exotic and fresh. You light a fire in people." Finnick said.

Haymitch jumped in before I could even finish putting together what Finnick had said. "Sweetheart, that boy is in love with you. Everyone has been talking about when you two would get together since you met. And trust me he's not the only one. Darius is obsessed with you. Ever wonder why he lets you get away with everything? Even disrespecting him. Or how about the Baker's boy? He is constantly staring at you. Are you that blind or stupid?" I was shocked by this. I had never even noticed. _Was I that oblivious?_

After Finnick and Johanna left to go back to their floors and I had showered and changed into my night clothes; which were just a thin white tank top and short boxer shorts, I headed to Haymitch's room. I didn't want to be by myself anymore. It was too dangerous because, my mind wonders and the whole world is brought down on me. I knocked on his door gently and I heard him grunt. When he answered it he was a little shocked to see me standing there.

"What do you want Sweetheart?" he asked gruffly.

"I-I can't be alone." I stammered out. He gave me a sympathetic look and moved so I could come in. I crawled into his bed and he walked to get a chair. "Haymitch you can sleep in your own bed." I said. He got slightly tense and looked at me with a raised eyebrow. I laughed a little. "I am just used to sleeping next to someone. I always slept with my sister at home." I chuckled and patted the bed next to me. He groaned and came to lie next to me. He was on his back with his hands behind his head. I scooted over to him and laid my head on his chest and wrapped my arm around his stomach. He smelt like alcohol and District Twelve, coal dust and earth. He flinched a little but then put his arm around me. It felt right in Haymitch's arms. My body tingled when his hand ran up and down my arm.

The next morning, Effie came barging in to wake Haymitch up because she couldn't find me. She had a conniption fit at the sight of us. She screamed at Haymitch about propriety and how young I was. Her screams did nothing to him he just shook his head and laughed at her insanity. Why should he have to defend himself? He didn't do anything wrong. She once again left in a huff. Later that day I would be sitting for the crowning and watching of the games, three hours of watching what I had already lived through. _What fun!_

I went into my room where my prep team was already waiting. They went on and on about my full body polish and how great I did during the games. I sat there and took it for what it was; three people who didn't know any better talking about things they couldn't even begin to understand. When they finished Cinna came in to dress me.

"Cinna," I started, "You have seen me naked at least a dozen times now. Do you find me attractive?" I asked looking away, blush swept across my face.

"Darling the first time I saw you I was lit with fire. It takes every ounce of self control not to _touch_ you." He said in an almost dreamy way.

I blushed harder. "Oh." was all I could say in return.

Cinna put me in a dress that made me look like I was a candle. It was white with glowing yellow flames. The top was tight but the bottom was flowing. Cinna's every touch sent electricity through my body. _Am I finally noticing men as more than just people?_ I didn't know why though. He did my hair up in a braid and only put minimal make up on me. When I opened my eyes to see what he had done I was again completely in awe of what he had turned me into.

As to be expected, the watching of the games was brutal. I sat there only showing some emotion trying so hard not to show how I really felt about it. Then Snow came on stage and placed the crown on my head. I felt sick again. His smell, blood and roses, I think that's what did me in, but more than that it's the monster that he is.

That night was the victor's banquet. Cinna had me in a long black and red dress that looked like sparkling, burning coals. I had to say I did look gorgeous. Cinna was a miracle worker. There was no way I actually looked like that on my own. I acted pleasant and danced with everyone who asked. I smiled a big, fake smile and thanked everyone for their support. I played the part of the excited and gracious victor. I couldn't help but wonder if Cato would have had to play this game. He was attractive, but nothing like Finnick. And according to Finnick I am beyond words.

That night after the banquet, we go back to the training center. Again I go to my own room and shower and change for the night and head to Haymitch's room. When I approached the door I heard him talking to someone. I listened carefully. "I don't know what to do about the girl." I heard him sigh dejectedly, "This is going to be harder on her than she knows. Hell this is harder on me than I thought it would be. How can we train her if she hasn't even been experienced? I am just so happy Cato died before he could bring his own form of torture on her."

Another voice spoke up, "We will just have to figure it out. Snow won't expect anything from her until the Victory Tour. Maybe you can convince her to sleep with her cousin." Finnick, that's who was talking. I was angry. _Why are they talking about me and my future? Not even trying to give me a say. _

I knocked on the door. They fell silent. Haymitch came to the door and cracked it open. He saw the anger in my eyes and I wedged my foot in the door. "What is it Sweetheart, we are in the middle of something, but by the look on your face, you already knew that." He smirked. I pushed past him and into the room. The two men just stood there staring at me a little tense; because they knew I had heard some of what they were saying.

"How dare you two try and decide what is best for me! I am not just something that can be given to someone." I turned to glare at Finnick, "And you think he can just convince me to have sex with my best friend, not worrying about the effects it will have!" My body was tight and ready to pounce.

"Listen, I didn't mean anything by it. We just don't want your first experiences with this to be a _job_. We wanted you to at least once know pleasure as just pleasure." Finnick said. I was starting to calm. Finnick looked at Haymitch a little worriedly, "Is she always this feisty?" he asked.

Haymitch started to laugh, "You have no idea." He rolled his eyes some. I was again listening to these two men have a conversation about me.

"I kind of like it." Finnick said with a seductive purr.

"Oh not you too, Fish boy." Haymitch said sarcastically, but his eyes told a different story. I couldn't quite figure it out. Finally I snapped out of my daze.

"Haymitch I want to go to bed! Please ask Finnick to leave so we may go to sleep." I said authoritatively. Finnick gave us a surprised look.

"Yeah, Fish boy you better leave you don't want to piss her off anymore." Haymitch said. He had an evil grin on his face almost taunting Finnick's thoughts.

"But you just said she wasn't experienced!" Finnick exclaimed exasperatedly. His hands went up and he dropped them by his sides showing his obvious frustration over this.

"Good night Finnick. Will I see you before I leave?" I asked sweetly and innocently. I knew this was getting him.

"Yes and I hope tomorrow someone," he looked at Haymitch, "will give me some answers. But in the meantime, Lovely, if you would like to switch sleeping partners for the night you know where to find me." He gave me a seductive smile and a wink. I blushed slightly.

Once Finnick was out the door Haymitch started laughing and picked me up in a tight embrace. "You have no idea how much I adore you right now." He said while laughing. "I never thought I would see the day someone made Finnick Odair squirm or get jealous." When he sat me down I walked over to the bed and patted it for him to join me like the night before. He lay down and we took the same positions as last night. He kissed the top of my head and I fell asleep.

The next morning Cinna woke us up as Effie had directed him. When he came in, cool and calm, he said, "Well if it isn't the two victors of District Twelve."

Haymitch looked up over me and I could feel the smirk on his face. "Well you know how us victors can't sleep alone."

Cinna gave out a light chuckle, "Yes I know the rarity it is to find a victor in a bed of their own." I rolled over and faced Cinna; he was beautiful and serene. He looked at me and held his hand out my way, "Come on girl-on-fire we have to get you ready for you interview." I got up and grabbed his hand and let him lead me.

Before we exited, I turned to look over at Haymitch, "So tonight on the train then?" I said coolly with a wink.

Cinna took me back to my room and he dismissed the prep team. He set my shower for me and toweled me off when I stepped out of the shower. With every touch it was pure electricity and I was not sure what to do with those feelings building in me. Haymitch's touch had a similar effect except his was like a slow burn in the depths of me. I'd never experienced these feelings, but then again I had never experienced being so close to men before. And with the knowledge of my upcoming jobs, I had started taking notice to men in that way.

During the interview Caesar Flickerman complimented me and told me how badly the Capitol would miss me. He asked me about what I was most excited about and other frivolous questions. I answered them all pleasantly, somewhere in between the truth and a lie. Luckily for me there was no audience so it was much better on my nerves. Cinna stood off stage behind Caesar so I could pretend like I was talking to him, just like in my first interview.

After the interview Cinna led me to the train where Effie, Haymitch and to my surprise Finnick waited. I gave Cinna a soft peck on the lips when we said goodbye and I blushed a little, but he had a real smile on his face. Not the controlled one he normally wore. _Well there goes my first kiss, even though I'm not too sure it counts as a real kiss._ This sent Effie into another fit about my propriety. The three men and I laughed as Cinna left the train and Effie huffed off to somewhere else. It was again just myself, Haymitch and Finnick. I stood back a little, my arms crossed over my chest, head tilted and my eyebrow cocked.

"I just came to say goodbye, Lovely. You really are a piece of work; it is going to be almost fun working with you." Finnick said. He had a twinkle in his eye and his famous grin on his face.

"When will we meet again?" I asked Finnick innocently; batting my lashes, trying my best to meet his expressions.

"Before you know it. Just call me when you are ready for lessons." Finnick gave me a wink and turned to leave the train. He smiled at Haymitch and Haymitch returned the smile with an eye roll.

"So it's just me and you then?" I asked Haymitch.

"Yup. I need a drink. This is going to be a long ride home." He said a little teasingly.

"Care if I join you?" I asked confidently. _I mean why not drink if I don't get a say in who I sleep with I may as well get a say in if I remember it._ He just laughed and poured two glasses of white liquor. We sat and drank. We didn't say much because we could almost hear the other's thoughts without having to actually voice them. In that silence a lot was shared.

Effie came out for dinner and saw the two of us at the table waiting for her to eat. I did my best to apologize to her for my outlandish behavior and promised to follow better etiquette. She seemed pleased and we ate dinner in silence for the most part. Effie and I tried to make conversation, but it was just pointless.

After we ate and headed to our bedrooms, I showered and again got in my sleep wear before heading to Haymitch's room. I went to knock on his door but he opened it the second I lifted my hand.

"Took you long enough." He grunted playfully.

"Well I wasn't sure I should come. I mean I need to get used to sleeping on my own now. I don't think my mom will be happy with me traipsing over to your house each night." I said mockingly.

"Well you can figure out your sleeping arrangements when you get home, but for one more night you can stay with me." He said this harshly, but almost hopefully. I walked in and sat on his bed. He went to lie down in his normal position. I turned to him and quietly hovered over him. I leaned down and was almost touching his lips, when he grabbed the back of my head and pulled me down toward him. Our lips crashing into one another. There was so much hunger and passion in this kiss I felt flames growing in the depths of my body, everything clenching and fluttering. We pulled away from each other panting a little for air. I lay down in my normal position and he placed his arm around me.

"Thanks, Hay, for my first real kiss." I said while my face was buried in his chest.

He leaned in some and kissed the top of my head. "Any time Sweetheart. Anytime."

To keep from upsetting Effie anymore, I made sure I woke up early the next morning and went back to my room and got dressed for breakfast. I was already at the breakfast table when Effie, followed by an annoyed Haymitch came into the room. "Oh there you are Katniss, I went to your room to wake you and you weren't there so I checked with Haymitch and he didn't know where you were either. I was about to call a search. How bad would it look if I lost my victor on the train?" Effie squealed.

I smiled at her and apologized for the confusion. "Effie, I was just so excited that I was going to be home today that I just couldn't stay asleep any longer."

Haymitch grunted, "See the girl is fine. No need to get your panties in a twist." He told her.

"Haymitch Abernathy, you were just as worried as I was! You looked like you lost your bottle!" She shrieked back. I just looked at him with a smirk and cocked brow. He shook his head and sat down across from me.

We all ate breakfast and as soon as we finished we were pulling into District Twelve. I was ready. My hair was in a braid, I was wearing a white dress, and I guess President Snow wanted everyone to know of my purity, because most of the clothes Cinna made for me for public appearances were white now.

When the train stopped and I went to step off behind Effie, I looked back at Haymitch. "Keep your head up." He gave me a reassuring smile that quickly went back to his miserable scowl. I smiled and waved at the press as I got off the train.

It wasn't until I saw Prim did I let any real emotion show; she ran up to me and hugged me so tightly I almost fell over. I either lost more weight than I thought or she gained some. We hugged and cried and laughed. "I knew you would come home, I knew it. You said you would for me and you did!" Prim kept squealing in my ear.

Soon my mother came and put her arms around both of us. Crying, "I stayed just like you told me, I stayed for Prim. I am so proud of you my sweet girl."

When we finally broke free I saw the Hawthornes, who were now supposed to play the role of my cousins. I gave each one a hug and kiss on the cheek, but when Gale saw me, he picked me up and hugged me so tight I thought he was going to crush me. He had tears in his eyes and in my ear he whispered that he loved me. I just cried, real tears, because I knew I was going to hurt him, but only to save him.

After the greeting from the train station I was taken to my new house right next door to Haymitch's in the victor's village. It was huge. All of my family plus Gale's family could live there with room to spare. Each room was decorated expertly to my tastes, or what _they_ thought my tastes were. Even with all of its conveniences and splendor this house didn't feel like a home. It felt hollow and empty. I immediately missed my small home in the Seam.

That night there was the welcome home feast in the middle of the square for the whole District. I had to give a small scripted speech and then everyone was fed. People from all over the District were talking to me and congratulating me. Peeta, the baker's son, came up and asked if I wanted to dance. Luckily Haymitch was near and heard. We knew it would look bad for me to be dancing with a boy my age, who wasn't family. Haymitch came over quickly, "Sorry boy, she needs to be heading back home. Long day. I'm sure you understand."

Peeta looked so disappointed, "Yes of course how selfish of me. Maybe some other time then." He then turned to walk away his head low. I felt bad, but I couldn't risk doing anything that would possibly upset Snow or make it look like I was going against his wishes, especially with all these cameras still here.

That night I slept alone, since I no longer had to sleep with my sister. She had her own room. I had horrible nightmares that I guess were only kept at bay because Haymitch had had his arms around me. I woke up screaming several times. Each time my mother, Prim and Haymitch who had ran over from next door where in my room. I was sweating and shaking. My mother looked at Haymitch with tense skeptical eyes. He looked back at her, "Nightmares come with the territory. They don't ever really go away." He said flatly. He looked at me with sympathy and Prim with pity, but he looked at my mother with anger.

The next few nights went the same, except my mother has stopped coming in at all and Haymitch slept in one of the extra rooms. He and Prim would come to check me. Only after I would assure Prim I was okay would she go back to her room. I would then cry in Haymitch's arms and tell him about my dreams. He would listen and he would tell me about his. I didn't feel alone and that was nice.

When the press finally left I decided to sleep in my old Seam house to see if that would help my nightmares or at least so I wouldn't be disturbing my family. I felt guilty for making them worry and I felt guilty that Haymitch had to assume even more responsibility for me, because my mother wouldn't. I would only have slightly fewer nightmares, but at least I wasn't being a burden on anyone, that made me feel somewhat better. I missed Haymitch's arms around me but I knew I was just being selfish.

Every night after dinner I would go to my Seam house to sleep. Every morning I would wake up early, hunt for Gale's family, since he was now in the mines and could only hunt on Sundays and then go to the bakery. At the bakery I would give, no longer worried with trading, the baker a squirrel and buy several loaves of bread and some treats; always making sure I left a generous tip.

I could feel Peeta's eyes on me whenever I was at the bakery. We would make small talk about the different breads or treats. We had struck up an acquaintanceship. He told me about how he loved to frost the cakes and I told him about Prim always making me go look at the beautiful cakes. He never took his eyes off of me though. It was unnerving and endearing at the same time. His eyes were always so filled with love and joy. I wondered if he will look at me in the same way after my tour.

I would also bring some game to Greasy Sae at the Hob and would buy whatever supplies Gale's family may have needed. Then I would head to Gale's house and drop off the meat and other foraged foods, supplies, bread and treats. I would also slip his mother two coins. Gale wouldn't like it, but it wasn't enough for him to notice so his mother, Hazelle, and I agreed it would be okay.

Every Sunday Gale and I would hunt together. We would meet at our spot and hunt until about noon when we would return and go trading in the Hob. Then we would drop whatever game and trade we had back at his house before heading back to my house in the Seam. After a few weeks of this routine and me pretending like he never said he told me he loved me, Gale brought it up.

"Catnip, you know when you came back and I said I loved you?" He started not looking at me. I could feel my cheeks start to burn.

"Yeah, you meant like a friend right?" I asked innocently. I knew it was wrong Haymitch spelled it out for me.

"Well, no not exactly. I mean I do love you as a friend, but also as more." He looks at me sideways trying to gage my reaction. The burning in my cheeks deepened.

"Oh." was all I can manage to get out before I kissed him. I didn't want to talk about this anymore. I just wanted him to shut-up. He was a little surprised but quickly and eagerly kissed me back. He was a good kisser. I felt butterflies start in my stomach and I wanted more. He pulled away and searched my face. I pulled him back to me and kissed him again. I'd hoped he got the hint, no talking just kissing. Kissing led to petting and groping. This led to clothes being removed. I wasn't thinking about the consequences, just that it felt good and I knew he loved me and that he wanted this too. I could feel through his pants how much he wanted this too.

I had known he had had girlfriends in the past; I just wasn't sure how experienced he was. I was surprised by the way he moved. His hands first finding my center and extracting arousal before he was in me himself. Just like in the woods our movements became one. We knew what the other needed and worked together like we always have to bring each other to climax, before falling back in a panting sweaty heap. Gale whispered in my ear how much he loved me. I just kissed him chastely along his cheek, neck and shoulder. We fell asleep for a while and when we woke up it was almost dark.

I grabbed his face to force him to look at me. "Listen Gale, I need you to know, that I do love you, but that this can never happen again. I need you to understand what I am about to tell you and to stay calm. There are things that are…" _how should I put this_, "things that are required of me. If I don't do exactly as I am told…people will get hurt." I narrowed my eyes willing him to understand.

"But what about us? What do you mean 'get hurt'?" his face shows confusion and pain at what I had just said.

"Look I am not permitted to go into details, but I need you to believe me and that anything you hear or see is not what I want… it's what is required of me. If I don't do it then Prim or you could be taken from me." My eyes were steady but I could feel the lump in my throat that told me I wanted to cry.

"So then why do this with me now?" I could see the pain turning into rage in his eyes.

"Because I wanted you to know how I felt." I said sadly. Both of our bodies were tense. I let go of his face and was looking at my hands. "Please don't hate me." I begged. He let out a sigh.

"I could never hate you Catnip. Thank you for sharing." With that he kissed me one last time, it was a desperate kiss, and left. I ran to Haymitch's house.

I burst through Haymitch's front door and into his kitchen. I knew he would be there drinking. "Well nice to see you Sweetheart." He said dryly. He looked me up and down then shook his head. "Finally tired of hiding out?"

"I have an experience. I am ready for training." I said flatly.

He looked at me sadly and shook his head. "How is he going to take seeing you, like everyone sees Finnick?" He asked.

"I tried to explain without explaining. He took it as well as can be expected; hopefully his heart won't break when the time comes." I said as I shuddered. I felt guilty, but at the same time, I knew he wouldn't take it back.

Haymitch nodded and patted the seat next to him. I sat down and he poured me a drink. "We'll call Finnick tomorrow." he stated.

"Does it have to be Finnick?" I asked shyly. "I mean if you don't want to I understand." I quickly added. He looked up at me astonished; I guess he never thought I would turn down Finnick.

"Why don't we call him and then we will see? Maybe we can both help you, if that's what you want. Cinna will also come to help with your styling." He said with a sliver of hope in his gray Seam eyes.

Effie called the next day to let me know that the Victory Tour was being moved up by a few months as this year's hunger games would also be a Quarter Quell and they needed the extra time to prepare for it. She said that she would be here to escort Haymitch, Cinna and I in a month and a half and that the tour would last two months. Haymitch quickly got on the phone with Finnick and Cinna and both would be arriving by the end of the week.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: AU In this story there is no Peeta in the 74th games. Katniss is the sole victor. I know other people have placed Katniss with similar multiple pairings.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter Two

When Finnick Odair arrived in District Twelve it was quite the scene. The girls of the district were fawning over him and the boys were all jealous. After just the rush and craziness of getting him and Cinna from the train to the victor's village, we all decided they were not to leave the victor's village again until it was time to go home.

Finnick and Haymitch took turns teaching me the art of seduction. Finnick taught me how to put on a mask for the Capitol. A mask they would love. A fake, glimmering mask just like his. Cinna taught me how to dress and hold myself. He helped me get used to wearing more provocative clothing and lingerie. I had always just worn simple cotton underclothes so these new garments took some getting used to. They were not comfortable, but they did make body look more appealing. I had gotten used to all three men staring at me in almost nothing. I would have to prance around in the lingerie and get their approval on whether or not it worked or if my body language and movements were sexy enough.

I could see each man, on occasion, give me lustful gazes, but they would quickly return to their professional stares. I knew which outfit, voice and movement each man liked best. If I really wanted to seduce anyone of them I could. I wanted to at times, but I restricted myself in the beginning. After weeks of coaching, I had finally passed all of their tests. For the most part I stayed in character.

My mother was appalled at the amount of time I spent "unsupervised" with Finnick Odair. Even worse was the fact that I had almost stopped coming back to my own mansion. I would come to visit with Prim every afternoon, but that was it. There were rumors spreading fast and quick throughout the district, luckily Haymitch and one of the biggest gossips, Greasy Sae, were able to tell people that Finnick was here to recuperate in the quietest district as to not draw too much attention to himself.

Gale on the other hand had stopped speaking to me when he came by one Sunday and my mother directed him to Haymitch's house. He saw the three men and me, barely in anything, drinking at the table. I tried to talk to him, but he refused. His mother had become Haymitch's housekeeper when my training started, but she was sworn to secrecy about what went on in his house, for her protection as much as ours and Gale's. She seemed to understand what was going on, she always did. She tried to reason with Gale that he was just over reacting, but he had his mind made up. I thanked her anyway for he help. Since I could no longer hunt, training had become a full time job, Haymitch and I made sure to pay Hazelle beyond well. We both paid her almost double of what any other housekeepers made.

I would practice my seductive speech and body language on the boys and men I would run into in the district. Just to make sure I was doing it right. Haymitch would always accompany me whenever I left the village. Soon almost every single male in the district had asked me out. I always declined. Haymitch was sadly proud that I had picked up this game so easily.

I stopped holding back though, I figured if I was going to be sold against my will, I may as well have some fun when I wasn't being forced. I decided I would try to seduce Cinna as he had already seen me completely naked and based on the conversation we had after my games, I figured he wouldn't turn me down. Plus is gentleness was at times far more appealing to me than drunk and sarcastic Haymitch or cocky Finnick.

Cinna's pleasure and adoration of me was completely different from the sweetness and purity that Gale and I had shared. I can't say one was better than the other, just different. I had gone to his room in one of the little numbers I had seen him be particularly fond of. I gently opened the door and walked in like fire dancing in the darkness. His beautiful golden green eyes widened in surprise at first, but then quickly darkened. He stood up out of his bed, in only his sleep pants. He had his cool and calm demeanor up. As I flitted toward him, I smiled and flirted with my eyes.

He spoke first, "Katniss what are you doing?"

"I am living what I can of my life… making choices that I can make, since I am only given so few." I said purring softly.

"What choice are you making now?" He asked.

"To be with you," I glanced up at him, his eyes shows adoration, "tonight." I placed my hand on his chest and I could feel him tense quickly then within the next heartbeat he forced himself to relax. He smelt of sweet cream and burning wood. He wrapped his arms around me and spun me so my back was against his chest. He moved my hair over my right shoulder and started to kiss down neck and onto my shoulder. He continued down my arm and spun me again quickly. With each touch little bolts of electricity were going through my body. I wanted him.

He nodded slowly as if making sure I understood. He looked into my eyes. His eyes were full of lust and love. I stood slightly on my toes so my lips could reach his. He met me and we kissed. His hands were on my hips then slowly went up my body. His touch was feathering, only enough to send electric currents. My hands were tracing the lines of his chest, back and stomach. I moaned when his lips left mine and started to travel down my body. We spent the rest of the night giving each other pleasure. And in the morning we showered together before I went back to my room to get ready for more training.

At breakfast Haymitch had a smirk on his face, "So I'm guessing Cinna finally got a happy ending?" he said sarcastically. I blushed furiously.

"Don't you worry dear Haymitch your time is coming." I said seductively giving him a wink.

"Oh Sweetheart don't be a tease." He said tsking me. His eyes hopeful shaking his head.

"You're only a tease if you don't follow through." I quipped back, "Plus I thought you, the great master, and Finnick were supposed to train me? So far you have just taught me how to act and dress."

"I know for a fact you got a good training last night. Cinna is one of the best." He smiled wickedly.

"You and Cinna?" I said incredulously.

"Yes, I have been with quite a few." He gave me a wink. I blushed again and started nibbling on the bread I had bought the day before.

Soon Cinna and Finnick came down; both men smiling and whispering. I noticed the closeness they shared and turned my gaze back to Haymitch to inquire if they had also been together with a raised eyebrow. Haymitch nodded back and I just chuckled ever so lightly. We were really a twisted family.

Finnick gave me kissing lessons. You would think it would be awkward, but in the scheme of things kissing lessons was the most normal thing we did. I really enjoyed kissing Finnick for the most part, except I felt guilty because I knew he loved Annie back home and I wondered if she hated me or knew what was going on. I guess he could sense my uneasiness. "I am not like that with her." He stated. I looked in his eyes questioning what he was talking about. "Annie, I love her as much as one person can love another, like you with Prim, but she is not mentally aware most of the time." I nodded my head. I understood what he was saying. He didn't want to take advantage; he wanted her to also be aware and want it. He continued, "She loves you, thinks you are a real life super hero." He chuckled. "You know if you wanted someone to be with last night, my door would have been open." He whispered seductively in my ear pulling me even closer to him.

I took a step closer so our bodies were flush against each other, "Oh Finny, what makes you sure you could handle being with me?" I purred back. At this I heard foot steps, loud and clumsy, Haymitch was coming near us.

He was laughing at our exchange, "Oh Sweetheart, you are probably right, Fish Boy here wouldn't even know where to start with you. You are a piece work." He walked past us and into the kitchen to get a drink.

I scowled at him and followed him into the kitchen. I grabbed a cup and held it out to him signifying I would be drinking as well. He kept mumbling "Piece of work" under his breath. Finally, he looked back up at us. "Well, Fish boy and Cinna are going to have to leave tomorrow as your tour will begin in two weeks and they need to be gone before the press gets here. Better take him up on his offer tonight." He finished with a wink at Finnick. I just scowled at him; sending him death glares. I didn't want Finnick or Cinna to go. I had felt safe with all of them around me.

After we dropped Finnick and Cinna at the train station in the morning Haymitch and I went to the bakery to get bread and a cake for my sister. The Baker and Peeta were in the front. Peeta was frosting a cake on a work bench and the Baker was behind the counter. Both men smiled as we walked in. "Well hello," the Baker greeted with a warm smile, "And what can I get our two favorite victors?"

I laughed at this, "We can't be your favorite. We are the only two!" I exclaimed still laughing at the thought. I heard Peeta chuckling too and I sent my gaze over in his direction. We locked eyes. His clear blue eyes looked into my gray ones like he was searching for an answer to a question. Haymitch saw and cleared his throat to get my attention. "Oh, yes, I will take three loaves of the hearty bread there and some cheese buns and a cake for my sister." I said quickly as not to loose focus again.

Haymitch leaned into me, "I will be right back I am going to go see Ripper, we are running low." I nodded that that was fine. He didn't necessarily like leaving me on my own out of the Victor's Village, but this would speed up the trip and he trusted the baker.

While the Baker was busy getting my order prepared, Peeta stopped what he was doing and came over to me. "You have changed." He stated staring into my eyes again, but I looked away, my body became stiff feeling shame because he was right. He took my silence and refusal to acknowledge what he was saying as permission to continue. "I have watched you and been in love with you since we were five, when I heard you sing, but since that pretty boy showed up you have changed."

I flashed angry eyes at him, letting my true colors show. The colors of a killer, a victor. How dare he think any of this has to do with Finnick. "Finnick has nothing to do with the change. It's killing other children and getting out and still having to play the game that changes you." I spitted out through gritted teeth.

He took a step back in fear and looked at me with sad, pitiful eyes before nodding and turning back to his work. The Baker came back in soon with my treats. "I do miss your squirrels. Do you think you will be hunting again anytime soon?" He asked.

"No, I have to be getting ready for the Victory Tour." I said quietly, my head turned down. I gave him a few extra coins.

As I was leaving Haymitch was walking back to me with a case of alcohol that would hopefully last us until the Tour. On the train there would be plenty, so we didn't worry about saving any. I went over to "my mansion" even though I have probably only spent ten nights there. My mother was waiting for me at the table. She was expecting me. "Where's Prim?" I asked as I always came by at this time to visit Prim.

"I sent her out for a while. We need to talk Katniss." He voice was calm, but her face was rigid. I just nodded to her. "I have kept my mouth shut for far too long. Probably because Hazelle continues to tell me you are fine over there, but it isn't right. It's not right for a sixteen year old girl to be spending the night in a house and traipsing around in only God knows what in front of three grown men."

"Oh, Good Lord mother! You have no idea about what you are talking about. Who told you what I was wearing anyway? Gale?" I am furious. She wanted to pretend to be my mother now?

"Yes. Gale came to see me. He said you were drinking with them wearing only undergarments." She stated matter of factly.

"Mother those three men, the ones you are so concerned about have been more of a parent to me than you have. Who was the one to comfort me, when I still stayed here, from nightmares? Not you, but one of those men who would hear my screams and come running!" I yelled at her. My body was tense, gripping onto the table leaning over to her. Heat rolled off my body. Before she could say anything else, I stormed off and back to Haymitch's.

The next two weeks went by in a blur. I had officially moved in with Haymitch and we drank and played cards most of the day and night. Hazelle made sure we ate and Prim came by every afternoon when she would leave school. Rory would come with her some days. They liked each other and I was just happy someone was looking at for her when I couldn't. Prim and Hazelle never questioned the fact that I moved in or wouldn't talk to my mother. Gale still wasn't talking to me and honestly at that point I was so mad at him I didn't want to talk to him either. Rory would tell me how he was though. He told me all he does was work in the mines and come straight home and sleep.

On the day we left for the Victory Tour, Cinna was in my room waiting for me to wake up. When I did finally open my eyes, I had two beautiful golden green ones looking right back into mine. I smiled and he kissed me quickly while mumbling into my mouth, "I missed that smile so much." He and I showered together. He washed my whole body and massaged my scalp as he washed my hair. He dried me off and then started to dress me. Cinna treated me like a special gift, like a porcelain doll that needed special care. The thought of being nothing more than a dress up doll for the Capitol bothered me, but I thoroughly enjoyed Cinna doing it. When he was done getting me ready, I was once again in a white dress and my hair was done in braids and curls and I had only a little make-up to enhance my features. Again Cinna made me look beautiful.

We were driven to the train and I didn't need to worry about bringing anything as everything was already supplied for me. There was a send off with the Mayor and press. Prim, Rory, Hazelle, Posy and Vick were my only family who came to send me off. I wasn't surprised by my mother or Gale's absence. Peeta was there along with other people from the district. Once we boarded the train, Haymitch and I headed to the sitting area to get a drink and play cards. This was a slower train than the one that was sent for the games. It would take longer to get from district to district; so Haymitch and I did what we did best. At night I would crawl into bed with Haymitch to keep the nightmares away, just like I did at home. Cinna didn't seem to mind; he understood there are some things that only another victor could understand.

The first stop was District Eleven. This would be my toughest district as I had been allies with Rue and Thresh had saved my life. I stuck to my script and when it was time for me to address the families I had to hold my tongue. I so badly wanted to tell them that this sucked, that I wished their children were still alive and how I loved Rue so dearly. When I shook the families' hands I snuck them a small coin bag filled with golden coins. When I got to Rue's mother I bent in to hug her, "I am so so sorry I wish I could have protected her better. She deserved more." I whispered this in her ear trying so hard not to cry. She just hugged me tighter. An old man started whistling Rue's tune when he saw the exchange and was shot on the spot. Haymitch, angry that they would do this in front of me grabbed me and refused to let me go until I fell asleep that night in the train. I was shaking. I didn't understand what had just happened. I felt sick.

We only stayed in the higher number districts for one or two days, as the Capitol didn't see them as important as the lower number districts. When we finally got to District four where we would be staying for almost a week, I was so happy to see Finnick. Finally, I thought, a friendly face. I had seen Johanna in District Seven, but she is not very friendly. She is like Haymitch on a bad day, disdainful, sarcastic and down right mean. Finnick though, was most always cheerful, even if it was an act. I got to meet Annie and right away I felt love for her too. She was special.

We were walking along the beach when she grabbed my arm and pulled me ahead of the others with her. "I can't believe I am finally meeting Katniss Everdeen, the girl on fire!" She squeaked like an excited kid, "Finn told me so much about you. He really cares for you." She finished quietly. Then just as quickly as our escape began, she drug me back to the group. Her eyes twinkled in the moon. She looked up at Finnick for approval, afraid she upset him by running away. He smiled at her warmly and nodded his head in approval.

District Four had been my favorite by far. I got to go to the beach and swim almost everyday. Everyone was surprised I could swim so well. I just shrugged my shoulders and blamed it on a big bath tub, which always got a good laugh.

Finnick took me out on a boat one day early in the morning. Once we had left the shore Finnick became more serious. His Capitol mask fading by each inch of distance between us and the shore. "Katniss…" he started, "I will be joining you on the rest of the tour." He looked up at me with a deep sadness in his eyes, his body no longer exuding confidence.

"Why?" I asked quietly reaching my hand to touch his arm.

"_They_ want me and," his eyes shifted nervously, "well you to move to the Capitol after the tour."

"What?" I choked out.

"It will be announced tonight that the Capitol's favorite victors will be moving to the Capitol." He said dejectedly.

"How come no one mentioned this to me? What are they just planning to get me there and not let me leave? Isn't that kidnapping?" I felt trapped, like a caged wild animal. He could see the panic rise in my eyes, my body shaking.

"Pretty much yes," he looked down, and then took me in his arms in a tight embrace, "but our families will be safe and we will have each other." I didn't say anything any response, what could I say. My fate was already decided for me.

When we finally got back to shore, Haymitch was frantically looking for me. I thought he was going to kill Finnick when he saw us get off the boat. "Where the hell have you been?" He snarled.

I stepped in front of Finnick, "WE went for a boat ride. I am fine." I told him sternly. He let out a loud exhale as if he had been holding onto his breath the whole time we were gone. He just grabbed my arm drug me back to the train where I would be getting ready for the banquet tonight.

"Sweetheart, you can't just go off and leave with out telling me." He finally said.

"I'm sorry Hay, but Finnick said it would be okay, he needed to talk to me and I've never been on a boat."

"Talk to you? About what? Why would he need to take you on a boat alone to talk to you?"

"Hay," I touched his arm gently, looking into his gray eyes just like mine, "I don't think I will be coming back to Twelve with you." I whimper.

"What do you mean you don't think you will be coming back with me?" he looked at me skeptically, harshly.

"Finn said that it will be announced tonight that he and I are moving to the Capitol." I let out a trembled sigh, my body still shaking from the news. He looked at me with tears threatening to spill out of his eyes. "What will Prim think? She is the only one who hasn't lost respect for me." I croaked out.

"Oh, no Sweetheart, Katniss, no. No, I will explain that her sister is the bravest person I know and is doing everything she can to make sure she is safe." He said this pulling me into his arms and lifting up as to protect me from all the evil in the world. He kissed me all over my face, head and neck. He carried me to our room and I kissed his lips and refused for him to reject me. He didn't and we spent that time wrapped in each others arms until it was absolutely time for me to get ready. He was gentle with me and that was truly making love as opposed to the other times I had had sex, which were more for pleasure and just the actual choice of it. Before I got up he pulled me in and whispered in my ear, "I love you, you insufferable girl."

"I love you too you old drunkard." I whispered back and kissed him before I got up and went to "my room" to have Cinna shower and dress me like the doll I am.

That night at the banquet I acted just the way I was taught by the three men who mean more to me than anything. I wore the clothes that were chosen for me. I bent to their will. I danced, smiled, laughed and flirted. I was everything that was expected of the Capitol's newest toy. As Finnick said, a mandatory announcement was made on the giant screens by President Snow. All of Panem would be watching.

"Dear Friends," the President started, "It is with great pleasure to announce that our two favorite victors have decided to now make the Capitol their new home." He smiled a revolting smile. There was a wave of murmurs that went through the room, everyone looking at Finnick and me. "That's right Panem, you guessed it, Finnick Odair and Katniss Everdeen will be calling the Capitol their new home and it is a very welcomed decision. The people of the Capitol are preparing and are so excited to welcome these two into their city. Let's wish them the best of luck in their new lives." He finished. The seal of Panem flashes with the anthem before the screens goes blank again.

Effie and Cinna came running over to me. "Oh Katniss I am so excited! How come you didn't tell me?" She squealed. Cinna gave me a look that told me we would be discussing this later. I had to snap myself out of my out of body experience. I was watching this all unfold and was seeing my body just react naturally in its new mask.

Finally I breathed again, "Yes I am sorry I didn't tell you Effie. It was meant to be a secret." I said in my practiced and controlled happy voice. Haymitch took to the bar and I glanced at him and back at Cinna. He understood and went to keep Haymitch company while I answered a barrage of questions and excited squeals at my luck. Finnick and I were forced together by the many excited people. He had on his mask as well, but his eyes were mimicking what I'm sure mine were saying. I felt nothing but loss. My life, the little I still had was now gone. I belonged to Snow completely. I was sure Annie wasn't taking the news well just like I knew Prim was crying her eyes out.

We left District Four in the morning, Finnick joining us for the remainder of our journey. We spent a week in each of the remaining districts. My hate was growing along with my helplessness. Between Haymitch and Cinna's efforts they kept Finnick and me alive. Finnick shower by himself and I kept my pleasurable showers with Cinna. Finnick and I slept in the room with Haymitch, I would sleep in the middle of the two men on the bed both of their arms holding me. Haymitch made sure we ate and kept us occupied with drinking and playing cards. Cinna made sure we were dressed appropriately and offered a calming effect. And Effie made sure we were on time. After a little over a month's journey we finally arrived in our new home, the Capitol.

Once we had arrived and were escorted off of the train, a black car was waiting for Finnick and me. We got in and were driven to a very tall and ornate glass building. We were escorted by two large peacekeepers all the way to the top floor and our elevator brought us into a large living room. There was a bar on one side and a sitting area on the other and the far wall is just windows, letting us see the whole Capitol.

I could smell him before I even noticed he was sitting there. President Snow stood up to greet us, shaking Finnick's hand and leaning in to give me a kiss on the cheek. "I hope you like your new home." He said looking around the space. Finnick and I looked at each questioningly. "I figured you would like sharing a living space. You have separate sleeping and small entertaining space with private elevators leading to those spaces."

We just look at him still confused. Finnick speaks up first, "Why?"

"Because Mr. Odair, I figured this will be more economical for me. I will have the two of you at my disposal all the time. You will of course have free time and will continue your other mentor and victor duties here." He answered with a sinister grin. "I do not need to go over the consequences with you if you, either of you, should decline. Do I?" We both just shook our heads no. We knew what the consequences were and now he was making us responsible for the other too. "Good, good, well I must be going. And you will need to be getting ready for the banquet." He left us there alone, shaking. We clung to each other. We had no one else with us.

We explored our new prison. We found our private quarters and found that they were next to each other with an intercom system with video feed. Why we would need that, at the time was beyond me. There was also a third room. I didn't know why we needed a third room, but Finnick seemed to know. He seemed mad about it, more so than our own rooms. My room was in a fire theme, since I am the girl on fire. Finnick's room was in a water theme. The third room seemed to be a combination of the two. "What's the third room for Finn?" I asked timidly.

"It's our shared room; for when we are required to do shared activities." He didn't look at me when he responded.

The elevator came up and off stepped Cinna and Dru, Finnick's stylist. Cinna grabbed me and held me so close and tight. He whispered in my ear, "Haymitch is going crazy. Can you please call him at the training center and let him know you are fine?" he looked around the room quickly, "Do you have a phone?" I looked around a bit and shook my head no. There was no way for me to communicate to the outside world. Cinna gave a defeated sigh. "Well lets get you beautiful, darling, you have a big night tonight." Cinna took me to my room and Dru took Finnick to his.

When we reemerged, we were the perfect dolls. I had on a long clingy, silky white dress, the lingerie underneath was enough to keep me blushing all night. Finnick had on a tux he looked even more handsome than usual. Our eyes may have shown we were dying, but no one would know by the way we acted and the way we were dressed.

Finnick held out his arm for me to take hold of it and as he led me to elevator to take us down he bent down to my ear, "You look absolutely virginal tonight." He whispered seductively, a sexy smile on his face.

"Oh you of all people should know how pure I am." I purred back. He chuckled a little. When we got down stairs and out the door the press was all around us. Taking our pictures and asking us questions. We didn't answer any questions but smiled, blew kisses and waved until we got in our car.

When we got to the President's mansion where the banquet was being held, it was the same circus with the press until we were able to get inside the door. Haymitch was awaiting my arrival, pacing back and forth.

When he saw me he pulled me to him. "Where'd you go? Why aren't you staying in the training center with me?"

"Finnick and I were taken to our new 'home'" I said bitterly. He was angry and slightly confused.

Finnick came up to us and put his hand around my elbow. "Yes new 'home' we are sharing. _He _really went all out to contain this fire." He said as he tilted his towards me.

Haymitch growled at him, "Leave, now, Fish Boy." Finnick left to go into the banquet leaving me with a very angry Haymitch, a fidgeting Effie and a melancholy Cinna. Effie, nervous that Haymitch may kill her, gently walked up and told us it was time to go. They announced Effie's name first and she walked in. Cinna was next followed by Haymitch. Finally, it was my time to walk down the long stair case into the ballroom. As I walked in cameras were going off in all directions. I felt blinded. When I got to the bottom of the stairs I curtsied and the room flooded with applause.

The food was exquisite, even though I barely touched any. I drank what Haymitch could sneak me to calm my nerves. They wouldn't want to show underage drinking but selling me was fine. I never did get the moral code of the Capitol. I danced with everyone who asked. I flirted shamelessly. I giggled and twirled as if on cue like in my interviews. Haymitch drank and Cinna babysat him. Effie watched me. She would lead me to the most important people at the party. These were the ones bidding on me. Whether she really knew that or not or if it was just an order didn't matter anymore. What's done was done. As the early morning was coming upon us and the party was ending, I snuck a quick kiss to Haymitch and Cinna and told them goodbye before I was escorted alone back to my "prison".

When I got there a man was waiting for me on my bed. He was older. I had met him at the party and for a Capitol person he wasn't overly enhanced. His name was Mr. Snile. He smiled at me while licking his lips. I had to remember all the things my three men had taught me. I sauntered over to him; he stood up as I made my way. When I reached him I placed my hands on his shoulders gently and flicked my eyes up to him, "Oh hello, Mr. Snile. I was hoping you would be here when I got back." I said seductively moving my hands down his chest slightly. He tensed only a little at my touch, but was enjoying it very much. "May I offer you a drink?" I asked turning to go to the bar, swinging my hips as I walked.

"Yes…bourbon on the rocks." He said. I could feel his eyes on me and his breathing getting heavier. I returned with the drinks and offered him a seat. He sat and as I went to take a seat he grabbed me and sat me on him. I giggled on cue. He kissed my neck and down my shoulders his free hand feeling my body. I became a robot on the inside. Only doing what I new would please him and in turn keep my sister safe. I was on autopilot. He left after we finished, placing a diamond bracelet on my wrist before he kissed my hand. I blushed and thanked him for the extravagant gift. "It was worth every penny." He said with an evil grin and a wink. I shuddered on the inside trying to hold in my disgust.

After the elevator doors closed the intercom went on, "Kat, shower and meet me in the shared living space." It was Finnick. I felt relieved. I quickly showered and put on my Capitol issued silk teddy. I guess this was what they considered conservative sleepwear. I put a robe on over it and made my way to the shared living area. Finnick was already there with two drinks in his hand. He was wearing a robe similar to mine, but nothing else. Either they didn't give him clothes or he really was that confident in his own body.

As I sat down next to him, still feeling sick and unclean, he handed me my drink. "You did good." He said in a low voice.

I shot daggers at him with my eyes. "You watched me?" I asked repulsed by the thought.

"Now before you get all angry listen to me. I will always watch the feedback of your nights. Not because I get off on it, but because I want to make sure you are safe." He said with a caring anger in his smooth voice. I calm down some. I knew Finnick wasn't watching to be gross. It's like when I would parade in lingerie in front of him he was only trying to help.

"Any pointers?" I asked sarcastically.

"Nope. Couldn't have done it better myself. Where did you learn those skills in the bed? I know it wasn't from me. Have you been getting private lessons from your mentor?" he replied mockingly.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I purred back. We continued to talk and joke about our "life" until the alcohol finally took the desired effect and we fell asleep in each others arms on the couch. Finnick always smelled like salt water and the sun, it was intoxicating.

Finnick and I started sleeping together. Not just sleep, but we would have sex. Even though both of us would have had a couple appointments a day, we would still be in wanting for each other. It was a distraction, like the alcohol, and it was real human contact with emotions. I wouldn't even say we were just having sex, but we let our walls down and would show each other love, the love and tenderness that we both craved. We would sing to each other songs from our homes. We would fall asleep in each others arms after. We never slept in either one of our rooms or the third room only on the couch in the shared living space. We didn't want to taint what we shared with the memories of the ones we had earlier.

Other than the clients who visited often, we were cut off from the outside world. Our meals were brought up by avoxes, unless we were on a "date". Our clients would tell us about the scandalous news and secrets of the Capitol. They would tell us how exciting the preparations for the Quarter Quell were. When either of us would leave our "prison" it became national news. We were followed by the press. They would hang outside of our building. I could only imagine what Prim and Annie were thinking as they had to watch their loved ones go on countless dates and parties, a different person or persons each day. This was/ is our life, what little is left.


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: AU In this story there is no Peeta in the 74th games. Katniss is the sole victor. I know other people have placed Katniss with similar multiple pairings.

A/N: _Point of view change. Present Time will start soon._

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 3

Haymitch was black out drunk again. This was nothing new before the Seventy-Fourth Hunger Games, but it changed when he let Katniss in. But she was gone, almost like he never even brought home a victor. It was worse though. He knew she was alive, but knew she wasn't living. He almost wished she had died in the arena. So he drank to keep from thinking about what she and Finnick are living through. At least they have each other, he tells himself. Hoping that Finnick is at least taking care of his girl.

"Haymitch," he heard her call. She was close, but he couldn't see her. "It's me Hazelle. I need you to wake up." She said sternly. He grunted. He opened his eyes and looked at her. His head was pounding, he reached for his flask. "Okay, well I am worried about Katniss. I saw her on the television last night with two older men. She didn't seem….like she was there. Her eyes they used to have life. They look dead." _Very observant, _he thought.

"Be happy she's alive and so is your son and her family." He grunted out. She gave him an exasperated look. Haymitch knows he's being an ass. But he is tired of the questions. Hazelle, the baker's boy, Prim all of them coming around at least once a week to ask questions. He was drunk at the Hob and the boy picked a fight with him. He didn't care, he didn't even fight back. He had failed the girl. He didn't stop her; he knew he wouldn't have been able to.

Haymitch showed up late and drunk again to the Seventy-Fifth Quarter Quell reaping. It had been announced that this year two boys from each district would be chosen. At least it wouldn't be two girls. The first boy called is only twelve, he is from the Seam. Haymitch didn't catch his name. Not that it mattered; the kid wouldn't make it past the first day. He was already starving and on death's door by the looks of him. He shook and was crying. The second boy called he did recognize. It was the Baker's youngest. He was seventeen and stocky. _He may have a chance_ Haymitch thought on instinct. He thought better and decided he wasn't bringing anyone home from the Capitol again unless it was Katniss.

He went to the train. And slept until the next morning, knowing he would at least be seeing Katniss soon, he didn't want her to think he gave up. At breakfast the next morning he was the first one there and was drinking coffee and eating, when Peeta came in.

"Look if it isn't our great defender. Where's your drink?" Peeta scoffed disgust dripping off his words.

"Shut your mouth unless you know for sure what you are talking about boy! Not a good way to get help from your mentor." Haymitch hissed back.

"I wouldn't take your help. Not if your help will turn me into a Capitol whore like Katniss!" he was almost yelling. Hate pouring out of his body. Haymitch had enough and punched the kid. He had no idea what was going on. He just needed to shut up.

Effie and the smaller boy came in just as Peeta was picking himself off the ground. "Haymitch what happened? Peeta are you okay?" Effie shrieked. The smaller boy, Rove, stood back still shaking.

"He needs to learn to shut his mouth." Haymitch grunted at her.

"I'm fine, really, Effie don't worry about me." Peeta said humbly. Hate towards Haymitch but trying to be calm for Effie and Rove.

"Haymitch are you sober?" Effie asked in shock.

"Yeah." He grumbled back.

"Katniss isn't going to be happy to hear you punched one of your tributes. Maybe she should work with Peeta." Effie offered back. She could see this older man was in pain. She knew how he felt about Katniss; she saw it in his eyes and his actions. The minute Katniss was taken from him he returned to the drunken fool he was before. "We will be there soon. Katniss should be waiting for you at the training center." She tried to console him, knowing this bear of a man had one soft spot. He just grunted that he understood.

He got up, went back to his room and showered and dressed. When he got back out they were just pulling up into the Capitol. Rove looked over at him fidgeting and asked, "Is there anything we should be doing?"

"Yeah, listen to everything I say and when we first get there you are going to go to the remake center. You are not going to like what they are going to do to you but don't complain and follow orders." Haymitch responded gruffly, looking at both boys.

They get off the train; the boys go to the remake center and Haymitch bounds to the training center. He burst through the front doors and runs to the elevator and pounds the buttons until it opens. Not caring if anyone else wants get on with him he hit the number twelve hastily. When he gets up to his floor and the elevator doors open he sees her. She is waiting for him. She takes his breath away, like an angel in a dream. She runs to him and jumps into his arms. He lifts her and carries her to his room and they stay there ignoring the pounding on the door by Effie.

She kisses him hungrily. She missed him more than he had even imagined, she is crying and pulling at his clothes. He holds her hands still and pulls away from her. "Sweetheart, slow down. I haven't seen you in six months. Let me look at you." He says. She lets out an exhale and smiles at him, a little life sparking back in her eyes. "Where has the spark in your eyes been?" he asks.

"It left and went back with you. It would show up some times with Finn and Cinna, but it was with you too." She says bashfully.

Katniss knows it is selfish for her to want to keep all three but she didn't care. She deserves to be selfish, she gives so much and she needs this. Haymitch understands. "I missed you Sweetheart, I let that boy of yours beat me up, because my reason to fight was locked away." His breath on her neck brings a fire to her pit.

She chuckles though at his confession. "And here I was under the impression Haymitch never let himself care. I thought you would have had a party since you no longer had to baby-sit me." She teases.

"Well I did have myself a party, drank all of Ripper's stash in District Twelve. There would have been more if a certain pain in the ass girl hadn't drunk more than her share before she left me." He quips back.

"You'd be proud at how much I can take now." She said as she hit his shoulder.

"I would be if it weren't for the reason." He said, his tone changing to sad. Katniss kisses him and this time he doesn't even think about stopping. They stay in his room until they need to leave to go meet their tributes for dinner.

As they are getting dressed she asks, "So I have been a shut in for a while, what kind of tributes did we get this year? I know its two boys that I was told before it was announced." She rolls her eyes at the ridiculousness of her situation.

"A twelve year old, Rove, from the Seam and the Baker's youngest, Peeta." She gasps a little when he mentions Peeta and she is disgusted that a twelve year old was picked. Haymitch continues, "Yea I punched Peeta, he requests you as his mentor." He chuckles at the memory from this morning.

"You punched our tribute? Why?" she asks shocked, but not mad.

"He kept rattling on about things he doesn't know about and when he mentioned you I lost it."

"Oh, well do you think you can play nice now?" she says leaning up to kiss his lips gently.

"No promises Sweetheart." He says seductively while slapping her ass.

Before dinner they catch a glance of the boy's costumes. They aren't on fire like she was but they are in light up suites that make them look like burning coals. Peeta looks intimidating, but his gentle blue eyes sell him out that he really isn't. Effie, Cinna, Portia, Katniss and Haymitch are sitting around the table waiting for the two tributes to finish showering and changing. They engage in polite conversation to pass the time.

"My Katniss, you are almost a completely different girl!" Effie chatters, "The Capitol has done wonders for you etiquette." She finishes. Katniss knows she doesn't know any better so she just nods with a polite smile, but it still makes her angry. She looks over at Haymitch who is doing everything he can not to punch Effie too. She then looks at Cinna to diffuse the situation, but even he looks mad. Luckily, no one but her has noticed and everyone's attention is taken off of the hostile situation that is brewing when the boys come out.

When Peeta first sees her sitting there his heart flutters, even if she has changed this is still the girl he has loved since he was five and just being in the same room as her is hard. He sees that the seat to her left is empty and quickly takes it before Rove gets to it. Rove is hesitant to sit next to Haymitch, but he is safer there than Peeta is.

Peeta takes the seat next to her and she gives him a reassuring smile and pats his shoulder. "How have you been Peeta, well besides the last two days?" she asks sincerely.

"Fine, everyone misses you back home. My father keeps talking about how your squirrels always tasted better since the arrow never went through the meat. How have you been? Do you really like it here?" he responds, whispering the last question.

"Oh, well, please give my apologies to your father about the squirrels." Ignoring the comment about being missed, she knows she isn't missed and there would be no welcome home party for her. She is being looked down upon as worse than the girls who hang around the peacekeeper Cray's backdoor, who will do what she does to feed their families. Even though she is doing the same thing, nobody knows it though. "I have been fine everyone here has been very… generous." She says choosing her words carefully. Haymitch, Cinna and she share a look.

After dinner they go to watch the opening ceremonies. She sits tightly between Cinna and Haymitch, both men holding her hands. Peeta notices and his hate for Haymitch grows, as does his jealousy, his jealousy for all the men who have had Katniss's attention. He doesn't even watch the opening ceremonies, doesn't even care too. He just stares at Katniss between two men who obviously know her better than just a mentor and stylist. Haymitch notices Peeta's gaze and smirks to himself. He knows how the boy feels about being jealous and hating anyone who touches her, but he also has more knowledge of the situation and is far more invested than some school boy crush.

When they show District Twelve's chariot pull out and Katniss sees the boys again she lets out a gasp and leans into Cinna. "Cinna, you and Portia did it again. You made District Twelve unforgettable, just like with me!" She looks at Peeta and with a quiet smile she says, "Peeta you looked so intimidating." She then turns her attention to Rove, who seems surprised that The Katniss Everdeen was even acknowledging him, "And Rove you looked menacing."

When the airing is over Effie tells them, "Go to bed, tomorrow will be a busy, busy day!" as she marches off herself. Portia excuses herself and leaves after. Rove hesitantly says goodnight and scurries off to bed. Haymitch clears his throat as to hint to Peeta to scram, but he doesn't budge. Peeta is refusing to leave until he sees Katniss go into her own room.

The elevator door opens and Finnick Odair comes hopping into the room, with Johanna Mason following behind. "Oh where is my Lovely!" he swoons as he makes his way to the group.

"God Finnick has got it bad," Johanna ridicules, "Katniss this, Katniss that. You would think after living together for six months watching and hearing each other get raped, they would not even want to touch each other. But no Fish brain here just wants to see fire girl over there."

Both victors stop short, realizing they said too much in front of "mixed" company. Peeta's eyes grow wide as he puts together what is being said. He looks at Katniss, then Finnick, then Johanna, and finally his eyes land on Haymitch. Haymitch glares at him to get him to leave and this time Peeta quickly runs to his room sick with the information he just received.

"You need to be more careful with what you say!" Katniss snaps at Johanna.

"How was I supposed to know your tribute would still be up staring at you and throwing death daggers at poor Haymitch and Cinna?" Johanna snaps back.

Finnick isn't fazed in the least over what happened, he just goes to fill the space where Cinna was.

"I am going to check on Peeta." Cinna says, "I hope the poor boy isn't too scarred to focus on saving his life." He finishes coolly.

"Seriously how was I supposed to know? My tributes went to bed the second the airing was over. They practically ran away." Johanna continues worriedly.

"No. It will be fine Jo." Haymitch starts, "The kid was getting on my nerves; that should put him in his place."

"Maybe this will make him decide winning isn't worth it, because he knows what his future will look like. Some days I wish I had." Finnick half jokes.

"Don't say that Finny," Katniss whines, "Then who would be there to hold me?" She bats her eyes at him. Finnick leans into her, Haymitch's arm still around her, and kisses her as if they were back in their "home".

"Yep I would definitely try to win if I knew I had to live with you." He says smiling at her.

"That's enough Fish Boy," Haymitch growls, "You get her everyday, she's mine during the games!"

"You know Hay, Finny has gotten really good at sharing." Katniss teases.

"Oh God! You too! How do you not go insane? How can either one of you sit here and joke about being held prisoner? Are you both that brainless? That's it he stays fish brains and she's brainless." Johanna barks. Their playful banter makes her angry, because she knows what they go through to some extent but yet they seem happy.

Katniss looks at her for a few minutes, "Jo, You know why we do it. We have people we have to protect. We joke because if we don't find the bright side we would give up and you and Hay would be two lonelier victors. Plus we have to give you something to bitch about. Right?" Katniss smirks at Johanna, daring her to argue.

"Well you don't always have to be so cheery." Johanna mumbles. Katniss jumps up from between the two men and lands on Johanna. She kisses her just like Finnick told her Johanna liked it.

When she got up Johanna had a dopy look on her face and then glared at Finnick. "Oh you and brainless over there sharing secrets about other people? Maybe I should share some secrets about you with her?"

"Go ahead Jo, we spend fifty percent of our day alone together, I doubt you have any secrets to share that she doesn't already know." Finnick replies haughtily.

"Oh really?" Johanna goes over to Katniss, "Did you know Fish brains here watched your games?"

"Of course everyone had to… it is mandatory." Katniss replies.

"Did you know he would touch himself when he saw you on screen?" Johanna looks at Finnick to gauge his reaction. He looks back at her confidently. Katniss giggles. "Oh that's sick Finn! You told her? I only knew because I walked in on you!" Johanna exclaims exasperated at these two.

"Like I said Jo, a lot of alone time together." Finnick winks. Johanna looks at Haymitch who just has a smirk on his face shaking his head.

"You," She points to Haymitch, "I blame you for this." She motions between Finnick and Katniss.

"How is this my fault?" Haymitch gasps back.

"Because you were her mentor!" She shouts back. She walks out in a storming huff.

"Okay how's it going you two?" Haymitch asks seriously.

"Well it's nice that we don't have to be alone, I guess, but sometimes it's harder because we are responsible for each other's loved ones now." Katniss answers honestly.

"Yeah one of us screws up and the other's family is hurt. It's pretty ingenious really. Not only putting pressure and guilt on us about protecting our own families, but putting responsibility for another person's family on top of that it's almost suffocating." Finnick continues on what Katniss couldn't elaborate.

"How are they?" Katniss asks quietly.

"Sweetheart they're fine. Prim comes over most days to ask about you. She says the apothecary shop is doing very well. Hazelle asks about you. She and the kids are good." Haymitch responds.

"And other than Gale beating you?" Katniss asks shyly.

"He's fine Sweetheart. You know living the Seam dream." Haymitch tells her. He doesn't want to tell her that the boy sleeps with every girl in the district just to forget her or in some way get back at her.

"Have you heard from my family or Annie?" Finnick asks.

"They're good Finn. She misses you, but she understands. Your family is doing well too." Haymitch says. "Now Fish Boy if you don't mind?" Haymitch moves his head to the side to tell him to leave.

Finnick gets the hint, but decided to be daring. "Oh I don't mind at all Hay, Katniss already told you I have gotten good at sharing." He purrs seductively and winks at the older man.

"I really wasn't giving you an option here Fish Boy!" Haymitch growls, but his eyes let on that he knows it was a joke.

Finnick gets up, grabs Katniss by the waist and pulls her in for a kiss. She pulls away first, "Good night Finny. Go see if Jo needs some cheering up."

Finnick smiles at her, "Good night. I don't know how I am supposed to fall asleep with out my lullaby." He teases as he heads for the elevator.

Haymitch takes Katniss's hand and pulls her towards his room. That night they just lay with each other, catching up on the last six months. Haymitch cries for her, but she just smiles at him warmly and tells him she would do all over again if it meant her sister was happy.

The next morning Cinna comes in to wake them up. "How's Peeta doing?" Katniss quietly asks conveying thanks with her eyes.

"He is taking it pretty hard. He is mad at himself for even thinking you chose this. He is still pissed at Haymitch for not protecting you, but he doesn't really blame him anymore. He still wants you to be his mentor though." Cinna explains.

"Thanks Cinna, but I think we will train them together. I'll focus more on training and Hay will focus more on the interview and strategy." Katniss tells him. Cinna is happy she is relaxed with Haymitch. There is no envy between them. He knows she relaxes with him in the shower and with Finnick whenever they are not previously engaged too. He knows they all offer her something different.

Katniss and Haymitch get up and dressed quickly. They don't really want the tributes to know they share a room. They made sure they were the first ones in the dinning room when the boys come in. "Good Morning Peeta, Rove." Katniss hums, "I hope you both slept well. We have a busy day ahead of us." She offers them another reassuring smile.

"G-g-good morning. Y-yes. Thank you Ms. Everdeen." Rove stuttered out, he was still in awe of her celebrity. She wonders if this is how Finnick's tributes talk to him.

"Good morning Katniss." Peeta says gently as if he is trying to convey how sorry he is in those three words.

"What… nobody is going to say good morning to me?" Haymitch says sarcastically.

"Good morning dear Haymitch and I assume you slept well." Katniss patronizes. Haymitch looks at both the boys expectantly. Peeta rolls his eyes; he is not ready to play nice yet. And Rove shakes at the sight of the big, scary man. Katniss laughs a little. "Boys you must know Haymitch's bark is worse than his bite, just don't make him bite though."

"What is the plan today, Katniss?" Peeta asks.

"I'm glad you asked Peeta. Haymitch and I have been discussing the way for us to give you both the best and we are going to coach you together. I will work with each one of you on training and Haymitch will work with each one of you on interview and strategy. We will be together the whole time to add if needed." Katniss explains with a gentle smile. Peeta frowns at this. Katniss continues, "As soon as you finish breakfast you will each get thirty minutes with us about skills."

After breakfast Peeta leaves to get ready and Rove is the first one to meet with them. "Well Rove do you have any skills?" Katniss asks soothingly.

"Nothing." Rove looks down at his hands nervously.

"Have you ever used any knives or other weapons? Do you know anything about plants, knots, camouflage?" She presses gently.

"No ma'am." Rove repeats sadly.

"Okay then you'll need to go in and train on the survival skills centers today. Plants, knots, first aid and camouflage. Try and master some of these things. Tomorrow we will talk about weapons. Now go get ready Effie will be waiting at the elevator at ten to take you down." Katniss tells the nervous young boy. She feels sick knowing he won't make it. He is so young.

Peeta comes in next and sits stiffly. He is not happy with Haymitch being present. "Do you have any skills?" Katniss asks.

"Unless the arena is a giant kitchen, no." Peeta says ashamed that all he can do is bake and frost.

"I don't believe that." Katniss starts, "I have personally seen you lift and carry hundred pound bags of flour and you can wrestle. Didn't you come in second to your older brother?"

"Well yes but I don't think lifting heavy bags of flour and wrestling will do me much good in the arena. I have no weapon skills. You can't wrestle someone to death."

"Don't be so quick there boy," Haymitch jumps in, "If you can get your hands on a knife you could do some damage and your strength will do you good." Peeta looks at him surprised. "You will want to focus on any center other than those that would show your wrestling skills and your hand-hand combat skills." Haymitch says.

"Yes I think that will be good for today. You better hurry to meet Effie she is waiting at the elevator to take you down. Good luck." Katniss tells him kindly.

For the next three days while the boys trained, Katniss and Haymitch went around trying to get sponsors for their tributes. Katniss was able to get funds for both boys based solely on who she is and who she has been with. Peeta had more funds than Rove because people thought he would at least have more of a shot in the arena. At night Katniss and Haymitch would go to bed together being careful to wake up early so the tributes wouldn't suspect anymore than Peeta already did. They tried their best to stay quiet, but sometimes it was impossible. Whenever either boy would question the noises they would blame it on Katniss's terrible nightmares.

After the private sessions with the gamemakers, Peeta goes up to the roof that Cinna had shown him the first night. He is surprised to see Katniss there alone. She is looking out over the city. Her hair is blowing gently in the breeze. He couldn't help but look at how beautiful she is. He is staring for what felt like an eternity when she feels his gaze and turns around, a warm smile on her lips. "Oh, hello Peeta." Katniss hums.

"Oh….umm… Katniss. Sorry…I didn't know you would be up here." Peeta shot out nervously.

"It's alright. It is a calming place, isn't it? Did Cinna show you up here?" Katniss responds smoothly.

"Yes. He did. It is very calming." Peeta says walking toward her.

"I am sorry for you…..you know having to be here." Katniss says sadly, her eyes down cast.

"Well, I am sorry you have to be here at all. You should be at home with your family." Peeta insists sincerely.

"Yes, it is a shame to not be at home, but I am doing so much good here for her." Katniss eludes.

Peeta grabs Katniss's hands and pulls her close to look her in her eyes. "Katniss, what is being done is not right. I wish I could find a way to protect you." Peeta asserts. Katniss laughs tragically.

"I'm sure you would now, but you looked at me no better than my mother or Gale did before I left. Even if I could come home, what would I come home to?" She asks wryly.

"I am so sorry Katniss. Believe me. If I could take it back I would and I would tell everyone they are wrong too." Peeta rambles his apology. Katniss doesn't even give it a second thought. She leans in close to him and kisses his lips softly before pulling away and heading back down stairs.

"Enjoy your time Sweetheart?" Haymitch says sarcastically as Katniss comes back into the living area. He can see the self loathing look in her eyes and the broken stature as she walked. She looks at him with curiosity. Haymitch is tense; he is bothered that the tribute went up to the roof where she was. He didn't want Peeta to make anything worse for Katniss. He didn't want him to make her feel bad. "I saw blondie go up stairs after you. He didn't say anything to upset you?" he asks.

"No, no. He just apologized. That's all." She says forcing back a smile.

"Bull. You can't lie to me Sweetheart. Something is wrong and if that little shit did anything….So help me God." He bellows. He is standing, body tense with anger, looking down at her. She looks so beaten down and hopeless.

"No. I just wish that…I don't know. I wish… you know… that the people back home wouldn't hate me." She let out, holding back the tears that are burning her eyes. She leans into him, face burying into his chest. She is still not allowing tears to fall. Haymitch's body softens, his arms reach around her in a tight embrace, rubbing her back to comfort her.

"Oh Katniss. They don't hate you." Is all he can say. He knows it's not all true, but he knows that they hate him more.

That night they watch the announcement of the scores. Katniss takes her usual spot between Cinna and Haymitch, both men holding her hands. All three of them sitting so close that it looks like Katniss is a living doll sitting on both of their laps. She is dolled up as right after the airing Finnick and she have a double date with a married couple. These are the ones, to Katniss, that are the worst. She doesn't understand why a married couple would want to watch her and Finnick have sex then watch each other have sex with them. The single people or the groups of unmarried at least, in her mind, aren't as perverse.

As expected the careers did very well in the 8-10 range. Nobody has yet to break her score. The rest of the districts did as expected ranging from 5-7, with the exception of one little girl from six who received a 3. Rove did okay, he scored a 6 and Peeta did well scoring an 8.

As soon as the announcement is over Finnick comes in the room. Effie is so excited to see him. "Oh, Mr. Odair!" She gushes. "You look absolutely ravishing. What brings you up to our humble little floor?" She inquires, her voice reaching a new high.

"Oh, Ms. Trinkett!" Finnick mimics her greeting. "Don't you look as stylish as ever! I am just here to pick up our lovely little Katniss flower here, we have a dinner arrangement we can't miss." He purrs. Haymitch rolls his eyes at all of the over the top acting.

"Yes. Of course." Effie blushes. Katniss gets up and walks over to Finnick swinging her hips as she goes, giving the boys a good show as she walks into the elevator with Finnick.

"Are you ready for this?" Finnick whispers into her ear.

She leans up and into him suggestively, "It's what I live for." She gives a dark laugh.

"You really are a piece of work. A perfect creation." He smirks back at her. He sees it; she is a perfect combination of Haymitch, Cinna and himself. Her dark sarcasm, her beautiful style and her seductive air are all of them.

They meet their "dates" at a fancy restaurant in the nicest hotel in the Capitol. To anyone else it would look like a double date, Katniss and Finnick out with another couple, but the reality is so much worse. The husband has been undressing Katniss with his eyes all night, his hand working its way up her thigh. The wife is drooling over Finnick finding any and every excuse to touch him.

After dinner the four head up to the President's suite. There is a large bed in the middle of the room and a small love seat facing it. On one side of the couch is a table. The table has all sorts of "toys" for them to use on the two victors. They know the drill. This isn't their first time with this couple. Katniss and Finnick are first told to start having sex with each other. Then the wife and Finnick are together, while the husband watches, fondling Katniss and whipping Finnick. He doesn't do it roughly, he's not really into what his wife is doing with another man, and his attention is on Katniss. Next it is the husband and Katniss's turn. The husband is gentler in his torture than the wife, who would seem to be jealous. She ignores Finnick almost completely as her husband devours the very beautiful and young girl under him. The wife whips her with much force that Katniss has to bit her tongue to not scream. She then burns her with a candle. Finnick tries to get back the wife's attention but she is enjoying herself too much.

After hours of pleasing the couple who inflicts torture, Finnick and Katniss are alone. Katniss, who is too sore to move, just lies in the bed in a ball shaking. Finnick walks over to her and picks her up. They don't speak; words are too much right now. He takes her to bathroom and runs cool water over her burns. There will be marks but no permanent damage and nothing some Capitol Magic Cream can't handle. He dresses her and himself and then they leave, both of them putting back on their masks. Katniss wears his jacket so no one will see the marks left by the woman on the way back to the training center.

Finnick and her step off the elevator into District Twelve's floor. Haymitch and Cinna are the only ones up. Both men look at the frail form of the girl. They can't see any marks but know she is not doing well.

"What the hell happened Fish boy?" Haymitch growls. He really isn't angry with Finnick, just angry at the Capitol and taking it out on Finnick.

"You know how it is!" Finnick defends, "The wife she is just crazy. I tried to get her attention off of Katniss I really did!"

"I guess you're losing your touch." Haymitch scoffs. Katniss steps up between the two men.

"I'm fine Hay. I just need some medicine and I will be fine." She says quietly assertive. She looks over at Cinna, not meeting his eye. "I need some of the cream. Finn already cleaned me so just put the cream on and let me sleep. Finn may need some too." Her eyes don't ever go to his, she is too afraid to see the look of pity in them.

"You aren't fine if you need cream, Sweetheart." Haymitch spits, his anger boiling looking for a place to get out. "Take off the jacket and dress, now." His eyes feel like lasers on Katniss. She can't look at him either, but complies, right in the middle of the room. She is only in her lingerie and they can see all of the whip and burn marks. They are not deep, but painful none the less.

"What is all the shouting…" Peeta starts, but stops suddenly when he sees Katniss, in her under garments, being looked at by the three of them, with whip and burn marks. He feels so much sadness for her and rage for the Capitol. The four of them look at him as if he just walked in on a perfectly normal conversation, which in some respects is true. Cinna quickly wraps her in Finnick's jacket and takes both her and Finnick in Haymitch's room before Peeta could get a word out. The look of disgust and pity was enough, no need to add more insult to injury by talking.

"Kat, I need the two of you to shower again. I am sorry, but the cream works best on damp skin." Cinna pleads with her. She and Finnick both climb into the shower together and when they get out Cinna rubs each of them with the cream. In the morning it will look like nothing had ever happened; only the emotional scars will be left.

Instead of heading back down to his floor, Finnick stayed with Katniss in Haymitch's bed. They sang each other to sleep. Cinna left them and went back out to see how Haymitch and Peeta were doing.

"What… Oh, God, what happened to her?" Peeta cries. Haymitch, who is tired and more concerned for Katniss, forces himself to stay there and calm down Peeta.

"Look. You have to forget what you saw. She is too proud to be pitied. So you have to act like everything is normal. No more apologies…nothing." He glares at the blonde boy who was crying in front of him.

Peeta looks up at him, "What happened?" he says forcefully with more anger than pity in his eyes.

"They had a 'date' and sometimes those 'dates' aren't always nice." Cinna pipes in from behind. He can see Haymitch's patience is gone and would not be able to explain this to Peeta.

"How is she?" Haymitch asks Cinna.

"She and Finn sang each other to sleep. They'll be fine… physically anyways… tomorrow." Cinna answers gently.

"Why would someone do that to her?" Peeta asks sheepishly.

"Because there are people who get off on hurting others." Haymitch spits bitterly, hanging his head. "I am going to bed." and walks off into his room. Katniss again sleeps tightly in between Haymitch and Finnick, just like on the train. Both men hold on to her as if she may slip away.

"Cinna?" Peeta asks, "Does that happen often? You know to Katniss?"

"That is one of the worst I have seen on her. If she has had worse she would never let us know. Finnick would know, he makes sure she is cared for." Cinna responds sadly.

"I have loved her since we were five you know?" Peeta states shyly.

"You may have known you loved her since you were five, but you are one of many who love her. She is something special. I don't think anyone who truly meets her doesn't love her." Cinna spouts demurely. "You need to go to bed Peeta; you have a big day of preparations tomorrow." Cinna walks out of the room and into Haymitch's room where he sleeps on the couch, not wanting to leave Katniss's presence.

The next morning Effie, followed by Peeta and Rove, open Haymitch's door. "Haymitch why aren't you up? Where is Kat-" She looks around the room, seeing the young girl in bed with two men while a third sleeps on the couch. Haymitch and Cinna awake at the disturbance, but Katniss and Finnick still slept undisturbed. "Haymitch! What the he-" she's interrupted.

"Shhh Effie!" Haymitch hisses above a whisper. Cinna is already up and walking toward the intruders. Haymitch leans down and gives Katniss a kiss on the head before getting out of bed and heading towards them as well.

Once they are all out in the hall Effie stands there biting her tongue to keep from yelling at the two men and looking at them expectantly. "Look Effie, I know you can't be as stupid as you play at about the victors." Haymitch snaps at her.

"Well everyone knows they like to sleep around, but I never thought she would be with the three of you at once and Cinna how do you even explain yourself. I know she is a beautiful young girl, but I thought you would have more self control than this drunken idiot." She yells. Anger boils in both men and Peeta sees it.

"Effie," Peeta starts, "Please calm down. I don't think it is what it looks like. I am sure they would be happy to explain it to you if you would calm down. I know you are concerned for Katniss, but I don't think they would ever hurt her. Do you?" Peeta says sweetly but firmly.

"Well?" Effie says impatiently, her foot tapping on the ground.

"Do you really think she wants to live here? You know how excited she was to go home after she won. Do you really think she wants to go on 'dates' with every wealthy man and woman in the Capitol?" Cinna hints, hoping he wouldn't have to spell it out for her. She looks at them with fear and shock in her eyes as the proverbial light bulb goes off in her head. She turns white and all annoyed fidgeting has stopped.

"You mean?" She gasps. Haymitch and Cinna just nod there heads yes to her.

"I don't understand?" Rove squeaks. They all look over at him. He has barely said anything since his name was called at the reaping. None of them wants to tell him what he walked in on or why it was. "I thought Katniss loved it here. Whenever we see her on TV or in pictures back home she always looks so happy. She always has everyone's attention." Rove quietly elaborates. They all shake their heads with such sadness in their eyes that Rove doesn't push anymore.

"Boys, today you will each spend half the day with me going over interview strategy and half the day with Effie going over etiquette." Haymitch says over breakfast.

"Katniss won't be helping?" Peeta asks nervously. He saw her last night and knows she needs rest, but he also just wants to spend time being near her.

"I don't know, we'll see." Haymitch grunts as he gets up to head back to his room.

When he enters his room he hears the shower and sees no one is lying in bed any longer. He walks into a dark bathroom and sees both Katniss and Finnick in the shower, crying. It broke him to see these two people who always put on a brave face crying in a dark bathroom. When she notices him she quickly finishes her shower and gets out. He wraps her in a towel and she braids her hair. Finnick finishes and stands there expectantly. "What no towel for me Hay?" He jokes.

Katniss tears hers off of her body and throws it over to him. "Here you go Finny. Enjoy the show." She walks out of the bathroom with Haymitch following behind. She starts getting dressed. "So who do we have first this morning for interviews?" She asks seriously.

"Peeta." Haymitch grumbles. She lets a small laugh out at his obvious dislike of the boy. Finnick comes into the room naked. "Fish boy can't you put on clothes?" Haymitch says exasperatedly.

"What's the point? Someone is just going to take them off again." He says jokingly, his famous grin on his face.

"That's true. Maybe I shouldn't bother either." Katniss jokes while mockingly pulling her shirt back off.

"I'm fine with that. I don't think our tributes would mind either." Haymitch says with a wicked grin.

"I know mine wouldn't." Finnick starts, "between my boys asking what you are like and if I have ever seen you… well let's just say they would definitely not have a problem with it." He winks at her before he reaches for his clothes and starts to dress him self.

"Maybe I should just pay a visit to all of the tribute floors naked….give them all a reason to die happy." Katniss laughs at the thought of her doing that.

"Let's not get carried away here Sweetheart." Haymitch chuckles. Finnick leans into her and kisses her while Haymitch rolls his eyes. "Alright Fish Boy get your scales off of her. It's still my time."

Finnick puts his hand in the air to surrender. "Alright, alright. See you two later."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Okay so sorry to any Gale fans but this is not a pro Gale chapter. He will shine later on in the story, just not yet. Thanks to those who have reviewed!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 4

Katniss and Haymitch coach the boys on interview style. Peeta will do fine. He is personable and friendly. The people of the Capitol will eat that up. Rove on the other hand will be quickly forgotten. He is going for shy, but it just looks like he has pure fear. The poor boy can barely sit still. Katniss feels bad and doesn't want to watch him die, but she knows he won't make it past the bloodbath. He will sit on his plate shaking so badly he won't even move. She hopes she is wrong, but doesn't feel optimistic. Peeta may do fine. Finnick's boys want him to join an alliance, but Katniss and Haymitch are skeptical.

After the interview training they have some free time before dinner. Katniss, Haymitch and the two tributes are sitting in the living area, Katniss lies against Haymitch and he almost has a smile. Peeta and Rove sit in the two chairs across from them. Everyone is sitting in a comfortable silence before Rove interrupts the calm.

"Katniss?" He asks nervously.

"Hmm?" She hums. She hopes he isn't going to ask something personal.

"Why were you in bed with Haymitch and Finnick Odair this morning? Is Gale right about you? I didn't want to believe the rumors back home, but" He is cut off by a hostile Haymitch.

"GET OUT!" Haymitch roars at him. Rove runs off and into his room shaking even more than before.

Katniss turns to Haymitch, "What is Gale right about?" She inquires angrily.

Haymitch is quick to try and calm down. He is trying to think of something, but is coming up empty. "Nothing. He is right about nothing." Haymitch says as he pulls her closer to him. Katniss pulls away and looks at Peeta.

Peeta looks at her awkwardly before deciding to tell her the truth. "Gale…he… he said that you were sick for choosing to be with three older men and that that he wouldn't take you back if you begged. He said it when he was drunk… He gets drunk a lot now." Peeta spits out nervously. He really doesn't want to upset her, but he can't lie to her either. Katniss has a solemn look on her face as she takes in the information. She is trying to gage what upsets her more, that Gale had said anything to anyone at all or that he was drinking.

"Thank you…Peeta for being honest with me." She glares at Haymitch. She gets up and heads to the elevator.

Once in she frantically starts pressing the number seven. She isn't particularly close to Johanna, but she needs to talk to another female. She is constantly surrounded by men. She loves her men: Haymitch, Finnick and Cinna, but she just wants to be away. She also knows they won't check for her there immediately.

When she gets to the seventh floor she tells the avox to send a couple bottles of white liquor to Johanna's room. She knocks on the door. "What?" says an aggravated voice.

"Jo, it's me Katniss." Katniss responds.

"Come in." Johanna responds sharply. As she walks in Johanna is sitting in her bed and is already laying into her. "What? Got tired of all your men?" Johanna quips.

"Actually…Yes!" Katniss shouts exasperatedly. At that time the avox came in with the bottles. Katniss grabs one and just starts drinking. Johanna is laughing at her, but grabs the other bottle and plays catch up with Katniss.

Once Katniss feels good and numb she starts to rant, "God….life is so fucked up!" She looks at Johanna. "I mean even if Snow ever let me go…I would have no where to go to. My best friend since childhood hates me. The whole district I helped feed with my game hates me! I have no idea why Finn or Hay or Cinna keep me around. They will hate me one day too." Johanna sits smirking at the girl on fire who has finally seemed to loose it. She has been waiting for this day, the day when Katniss would stop trying to hide behind her mask or humor and to finally go nuts. "I am so fucked up I am sitting here…talking to the only other female I kind of know and even you hate me! AAGGHH! I am so sick of it. Maybe I'll just let one of them go too far with their torture and kill me."

Johanna finally drops her smirk and stares wide eyed at the raving girl in front of her. She doesn't hate Katniss, but she has rarely ever seen her be herself. She liked this fiery girl standing in front of her having a mental breakdown. She felt bad for her, but she liked the real Katniss.

"Calm down Brainless. Nobody hates you." Johanna says rolling her eyes at the crazed girl in front of her. "You know for sure Finn doesn't hate you, you are all he talks about. You even have the Annie seal of approval. You must have some skills I have never experienced, because even Haymitch acts like things matters when you're around. I know it sucks but just think about your sister, she would die without you." Johanna tries to be comforting but her tone comes off as annoyed by the girl's stupidity of thinking everyone hates her. "At least you still have people. I have no one." She finishes bitterly.

"I'm so sorry Jo. I didn't mean to loose it. Or make you feel bad. I just needed to get away from it all. I just feel like…like I… I don't know…I feel like everyone is ashamed of me or I let them down somehow." Katniss says calming down.

"I guess I never had to worry about how other people see me. No one I loved is around to judge me." Johanna concedes, "I guess I may have it slightly better then." She says jokingly. Truth is neither of them had it good.

"Haymitch?" Peeta asks hesitantly after Katniss left.

"Huh?" Haymitch grunts.

"I was trying to think of a way to help Katniss…you know… so she doesn't have to live like this."

"Oh yeah? And what's this idea?" Haymitch asks sarcastically. He has been trying to find a way to get her out of it and his plan is almost ready to fully take effect.

"Maybe during my interview…we could somehow lead Caesar to ask me questions about a girl I like… and when I answer that the girl I like can't be mine because she is being held here against her will. They will have to put two and two together then." Peeta hurriedly finishes. It isn't the worst plan Haymitch has heard. The worst plan was his one drunken night. He planned to go to the Capitol walk up to Snow and slay a dragon and rescue Katniss from her tower. The kid was pretty smart. But who knows what Snow would do to get back at her thinking she put him up to it.

"No…that will most likely get her hurt more." He says flatly.

"Oh…Okay. It was just an idea I had." Peeta says meekly.

They sit together talking about their families and drinking for hours when finally a frantic Finnick shows up banging on the door. "Jo?" He yells through the door. The two girls roll their eyes at him from behind the door.

"What Finn?" Johanna calls back. "I'm kinda busy at the moment." She stands to go get the door, Katniss following closely behind.

"You haven't seen Katniss have you?" Finnick asks anxiously.

"Hmm? Katniss?" She teases as she opens the door. Finnick runs past her to grab a hold of Katniss.

"Where have you been? Haymitch has been tearing the place apart looking for you. Wait? Are you drunk?"

"Oh. Hi Finnick. Yes I'm fine. Thanks for barging in MY room like the oaf that you are." Johanna says sarcastically behind him. Katniss glares at him and refuses to answer until he acknowledges Johanna.

"Hello Ms. Mason. How are you this fine evening?" He says in his most proper accent. Katniss starts to giggle. He looks between the two girls and then at the several empty bottles on the ground, putting to shame any good sailor.

"I just came to pay a visit to my good friend Jo, here." Katniss slurs.

"Yeah. We had some good old fashioned melt down fun." Johanna says drunkenly annoyed at the fuss. Finnick just looks at Katniss and pulls her to him. She doesn't put up a fight. He looks over her head at Johanna.

"Thanks for being there for her." He says appreciatively.

"Anytime Fish Brains. She is a much better drunk than any of you boys." Johanna smirks back to him.

Finnick leads Katniss back up to her floor. She is drunk and happy. She doesn't understand what all the fuss is about, but when she hears his voice she knows she is in trouble. She tenses in Finnick's tanned muscular arms and looks up into his green-blue eyes pleadingly. He just gives her a devilish grin and pushes her off the elevator when it opens. She stumbles out and barely catches herself before she falls. Before Haymitch can even start yelling Finnick heads him off. "She was with Jo. They had a couple bottles a piece… I am guessing. Jo said something about a melt down."

Katniss glares up at him, feeling less happy by the second. "I just needed to get away from my watch dogs." She says belligerently. She walks over to the couch and falls into it. Haymitch and Finnick come to join her.

"Is this about what bread boy and the pip squeak said?" Haymitch asks. She just glares at him, his steal gray eyes bore right into hers. "I am taking your silence as a yes."

"You shouldn't," She starts anger filling her. "I am just mad at my own drunken mentor for lying to me."

"I didn't lie to you." He defends himself, "I just didn't tell you the whole truth. I didn't want to hurt you anymore."

"Is he really drunk all the time? I mean he would have never touched the stuff before. He always looked down on you for being so weak you needed to drink." She says bitingly.

"Well to be honest I am not too sure if he is always drunk… he does fill the empty barstool next to mine at Ripper's stand often." He sighs. "Sweetheart he doesn't understand just like your mother. But that doesn't mean he has stopped caring. Trust me he cares that's why he drinks because he cares too much."

"Why would he say those things then?" Katniss asks. Sometimes she had a hard time understanding others' feelings and their responses.

"His ego was hurt. The girl he thought, as well as everyone else, he was going to marry, started living with three men then moved to the Capitol and started dating every wealthy person that could exist." She knows he is right and she can't really hold anything against Gale. It just hurts.

She nods her head and sighs. "Did I miss dinner?"

"No we were just waiting for you Sweetheart." Haymitch says.

He helps her up and she hugs him and gives him a quick kiss before looking over at Finnick. "Thanks Finn…for finding me. I have some questions for you later. I had a very interesting conversation with Jo." She gives him a wink and he blushes.

"We will have plenty of time to talk during the games Lovely." He gives her a grin and walks out. She follows Haymitch to the dinning room where everyone is sitting waiting for her.

"Katniss where have you been I was almost forced to start dinner without you." Effie scolds.

"Sorry I was spending some girl time with Johanna. I should have been more aware of the time." Katniss tries to say sincerely.

Rove refuses to look up at her or Haymitch and Peeta's eyes again stare at Katniss making her feel nervous. Cinna and Portia are missing from dinner and without her having to ask, Haymitch is already whispering in her ear, "They needed to finish the interview costumes. Cinna got some other priority orders in too." She knows what he means. President Snow has again requested an outfit or two for her.

After dinner Effie leaves and it is again the two victors and their tributes. Rove gets up nervously to leave, but Katniss stops him. "Rove it's okay. You don't have to run off to your room if you don't want to. I'm not upset with you. Neither is Hay." She looks back sternly at Haymitch, "Right?"

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry I yelled at you kid." Haymitch responds automatically.

"I- I'm sorry I upset you Ms. Everdeen." Rove replies meekly. She walks over to the boy and pulls him in tight. She remembers feeling alone and without love before her games and this is her ways of making him feel better, just like she used to do with Prim. He relaxes in her arms and hugs her back. Haymitch clears his throat indicating that was enough coddling of a tribute. She pulls away and tries to give the boy she is sending to his death a reassuring smile. "Y-you know Ms. Everdeen," Rove starts gaining a little more confidence, "You are the most beautiful victor I've ever seen." He blushes a bright crimson.

"Thank you Rove." She bends towards him and kisses his cheek. He blushes even harder before running to his room, mumbling his goodnights.

Peeta nervously looks at her, "How are you feeling?" He asks addressing the elephants in the room from last night and from this afternoon.

"I'm good as new. See?" she holds arms to show that the marks were gone. She knows he doesn't just mean physically but that is as deep as she can go.

"I can see." He says his eyes scanning her longingly. He stands to get up to leave too. "Rove was partly right you know? About you being the most beautiful victor. It's the victor part he got wrong. You are the most beautiful person." He says blush creeping up his cheeks as well.

She blushes back and looks back at Haymitch. "He's right." Haymitch agrees. She blushes harder.

"Goodnight Peeta." Katniss manages before he is out of hearing distance. "So you think I am the most beautiful person you've ever seen do you?" she asks Haymitch teasingly. He gives her a mischievous grin and grabs her by the wrist pulling her back into him. He kisses her and her knees feel weak. He picks her up like a rag doll and carries her back to his room. They don't worry about keeping quiet that night. Everyone they were being quiet for has already seen them in bed with Finnick. So who cares what else they would think.

As Haymitch holds her in his arms he thinks about his plan. It is almost ready. Maybe another six months. He wonders if he can stand to watch her and know what is happening and not stop it for that long. He knows six months would be better than forever but the pain of knowing what she is going through is slowly killing him. He doesn't need to tell her this. She knows. She knew he cared for her last year at this time. They would always sit next to each other and have silent conversations with their eyes. Somehow they knew exactly how to communicate without words. Neither one of them has ever been any good at communicating with words, but they communicate on a different level.

In the morning they get up and join the tributes for breakfast. It is eaten in awkward silence. Peeta is back to glaring daggers at Haymitch and Rove just blushes furiously. They had heard the two mentors and there was no denying that it wasn't just Katniss's nightmares anymore.

Cinna and Portia come in as the foursome finish eating. Cinna as always looks calm and other than the gold eyeliner doesn't look "Capitol". He wears all black all the time, which is out of place in the Capitol where the brighter the color the better. He has dark hair and caramel colored skin. Portia on the other hand is more "Capitol". Her hair is a silver-purple color and she wears the same color lipstick. Her skin is darker than Cinna's and her eyes are a dark brown.

"Are our two tributes ready for a day of rest and beauty?" Portia asks cheerfully.

Cinna smiles at Katniss, but quickly turns back to the tributes. "Yes we have a lot of work to do for tonight." Cinna adds. Peeta and Rove nod and stand to leave.

Peeta pushes his blonde hair away from his clear blue eyes as he turns to look at Katniss. His fair skin color is a contrast from everyone else in the rooms. Rove, Haymitch and Katniss are clearly from the Seam they all have olive skin and dark hair, but Peeta is very light skinned. "Will we see you before the interview?" He asks nervously.

"Of course, Peeta. We will all go down together." Katniss responds tiredly. She is a little tired of his constant need to want her around. Peeta relaxes some and leaves. Rove is happy to be leaving the awkward silence that was breakfast. Katniss and Haymitch go to get dressed, they have a day full of trying to get more sponsors.

"Cinna?" Peeta asks.

"Yes Peeta."

"You love her don't you?"

"Yes Peeta."

"Why?"

"Because she lights a fire in me. A fire I never had before. She breathed life into my soul." Cinna answered wistfully.

"And you are okay that she loves Haymitch?" Peeta asks curiously.

"It's not the matter that she loves Haymitch or Finnick or myself. It's the fact that I know she needs all of us to survive. We don't have the option of loving just one person or the other with her." Cinna explains. He feels tense at this conversation, but on the outside remains collected.

"What if she had the choice? Who do you think she would choose?" Peeta pushes.

"That depends. Has she had to live the life she has had?" Cinna inquires.

"Yes." Peeta says.

"Well then I think she should choose Finnick. He is the only one who would truly understand all she has been through and be able to maybe help her live again." Cinna replies. He doesn't know if it is true, but he figures Haymitch will not live through much more of this if he doesn't get himself killed with his "plan" first and Cinna would always be a reminder of the perfect Capitol life, which Katniss definitely did not have.

"Then why do you continue to love her if you don't think she should be with just you?" Peeta presses.

"Because she needs me to." He says with a since of finality.

"Oh. What if she didn't have this life?" Peeta continues.

"Well if there were no games I would assume, based off of what Haymitch has told me that she would be with Gale." Peeta's face looks defeated as he thinks about the fact that he would and will never be with Katniss, there is always someone better than him. Cinna continues noticing the boys face but ignoring it no need to fill him with any hope. "If it was just she won the games and went home…Well that I do not know. I don't know if Gale would be able to handle her nightmares. Haymitch would be a good choice, he can relate. I may have even had a chance as we were close emotionally." Cinna finishes. Peeta just nods in understanding.

When Cinna had finished with Peeta he went to find Katniss and get her ready for the interview. Portia would handle Haymitch. When Katniss steps in the shower she stand there waiting for Cinna to join her, but he doesn't. He stands stiff, frozen thinking about the conversation he and Peeta had had earlier. "Cinna aren't you going to join me?" Katniss whimpers.

"Do you need me any longer Darling?" Cinna asks. His voice is smooth not showing the fear he is really feeling over her answer.

"What do you mean Cinna?" She asks nervously. She prays he still understands that she needs all three of them. She needs Cinna to be her sweet memory. She needs Finnick to be her happy ending and she needs Haymitch to be her protector.

"You know I love you and I know you love me in your own way, but do you need me? You have other men who love you that would be better suited for you." He answers.

"Yes I need you." Katniss whispers.

"Why?" Cinna asks curiously.

"I need you so that I have a happy memory before I have to go out and face the world. Only you can dress me like a doll and make me feel wonderful about it." She responds embarrassedly. That was enough of an answer for Cinna. He sheds his clothes and joins her in the shower.

For the interview Katniss was dressed in a fiery orange, red and yellow dress. It is tight and low cut. There is a slit that runs all the way to her hip and her iridescent heals match the sparkling flames of her dress perfectly. She feels ashamed that she will upstage her tributes, but hopes that she will at least be able to pull a few more sponsors based solely on her looks.

Peeta and Rove are both in black tuxes. Peeta's tux shimmers in orange and red and Rove's shimmers in yellow and gold. They both look very handsome and Peeta will definitely win himself more sponsors tonight. He is very attractive and his personality just adds to his desirability. Rove is too young to have the same appeal and he definitely doesn't have the personality either.

When Katniss walks out of her room Haymitch, Peeta and Rove all stare at her with mouths open. "Katniss, dear, you look absolutely wonderful! No one will be able to keep their eyes or hands off of you!" Effie shrills. This makes Katniss mad. She doesn't want eyes and definitely not hands on her tonight. Haymitch stops his staring and regains his composure. He steps towards her and kisses her chastely before placing her hand around his arm.

Haymitch did look particularly handsome tonight. He was clean shaven. His dark hair brushed and pulled back so it is no longer in his face. He has a strong jaw line and is very tall. Despite the fact that he has drunken the past twenty-five years away he is still built well, not as muscular as he was during his games, but he has kept up his shape.

Katniss looks up at him and gives him a small smile. He knows she is nervous about how the boys will do, but more she is self-conscious about the way she looks. Rove has yet to stop staring and Peeta is just now gaining composure. The whole team heads down to where the interviews will be held. They have to drop off the tributes back stage before they make their way to where they are to wait. "Good luck boys." Katniss says with a reassuring smile before she kisses each one on the cheek. Haymitch nods his head at both of them and they leave.

The boys from District Four come up to where they are standing; both look like a less attractive Finnick, but strong and big none the less. The first boy is staring at Katniss as she walks away, his eyes trying to undress her. "So…Katniss…Is she as 'fun' as I've heard?" He asks wickedly.

"No more 'fun' than I'm sure you've heard Finnick is." Peeta replies coolly. He is angered by the boy's presumptiveness. "Don't you need to be going back to your spot in line?" Peeta asks impatiently.

The boy laughs back, "Yeah come on Brack." He motions for the other boy to follow.

As Haymitch and Katniss make their way to the mentor waiting area they see Finnick and Johanna walking ahead of them. Katniss whistles at them. Finnick turns his head, his golden-brown and auburn hair swishing with his quick movement. His face lights up as he sees Katniss. Finnick can hardly contain himself when he sees her leg pop through the high slit in her dress as she walks towards them.

"Wow!" Finnick says slowly. "Cinna really out did himself. You look…" he can't finish his statement he is too awestruck with her beauty. Finnick looks good as well. He is in a dark ocean blue suit with diamonds incrusting it to look like waves.

"Close your mouth Finn you're drooling." Johanna tells him exasperatedly. Johanna is wearing a green, velvet, form fitting dress that covers her entire body. Her short reddish brown hair is in tight curls against her scalp.

Katniss, ignoring Johanna's comment asks sarcastically, "Really? You don't think it is a little over the top?"

"And here I thought this was supposed to be about the tributes." Johanna quips under her breath.

Finnick, finally, coming back down to reality closes his gaping mouth and smiles at Katniss. "You are going to be the cause of many heart attacks tonight. And I already think once all the tributes see you…you won't need to show up on each floor naked for them to die happy." He jokes. Katniss and Haymitch laugh. Johanna just looks at them all like they are crazy.

When the interviews are ready to begin the stylists for each district are called up first and are seated and then the mentors are to follow. As expected the crowd goes crazy when Finnick steps on the stage. Caesar can't help but to talk to the bigger than life star. "It is so good to see you again Finnick!" He exclaims. "How has the Capitol life been?"

Finnick gives a sexy smile and winks at the crowd making them go crazier. "It's been wonderful Caesar. _We_ have been enjoying all the Capitol has to offer." He looks at the crowd with playfulness. "But you know we can't talk about personal life now… it's the tributes time to shine."

"You always leave us wanting more Finnick!" Caesar fusses. Finnick walks off blowing kisses and waving to the audience.

The rest of the mentors are not given such treatment. It isn't until Katniss comes out does the audience go nuts again. The catcalls alone were enough, but the cheers and thunderous clapping shook the stage. "Beautiful Katniss!" Caesar gushes, "You have set us on fire once more! Tell me… how has the Capitol been treating you?"

Katniss blushes and giggles on cue. "Caesar you look wonderful! I love the new color this year! I hear orange is the new blue!" Katniss prattles excitedly. Caesar blushes over the compliments. "The Capitol has been wonderful, but I must remind you we are here for the tributes not me." She bats her lashes and giggles.

"Katniss Everdeen…still the girl on fire!" Caesar exclaims after she kisses his cheek and walks off the stage waving and blowing kisses.

When she makes her way to the audience towards the mentors seating area she sits between Finnick and Haymitch. "Thanks for saving me a seat boys." She smirks at them. Both men look at her with smirks on their faces as well. They all know just her presence has screwed over the tributes.

"I never thought I'd see the day when the crowd was more excited over someone other than Finnick." Haymitch half jokes.

"Yeah…I may be insulted! They never made the stage shake for me." Finnick fakes insult.

"Whatever… you two just can't handle the fire that is me." She rolls her eyes at the insanity of this situation. Pretending to care who the crowd likes more.

The interviews go as expected. The Career districts all have to same strategy, sociopath killers. The other districts range from sullen to cocky to aloof. Rove's interview comes and goes. He stutters the whole time and fidgets with his hands. Caesar, as always, tries his best to calm him down, but the poor young boy is just too frightened. It's Peeta's interview though that everyone talks about. He jokes with Caesar about his time in the Capitol and the crowd eats it up.

"So Peeta… do you have a special girl waiting at home for you?" Caesar asks. Haymitch is nervous. Hopefully Peeta doesn't go with his plan from yesterday.

"No…unfortunately I don't." Peeta sighs.

"A handsome boy like you? Surely there is a girl you like?" Caesar presses.

"Well there is this one girl…but I don't think she really noticed me until I was reaped." Peeta says shyly.

"Well here's what you do…you win the games and go home and she won't be able to pass you up then!" Caesar explains as if it is the most logical solution. Curses are going off in Haymitch's head he is praying that Peeta doesn't say anything that will hurt Katniss.

"It's not that easy…you see everyone in Panem is in love with her too." Peeta lets go.

It finally dawns on Katniss as well as everyone else watching who he is talking about. Her face flushes red not because she likes him too, but with anger. She feels like he is being careless and putting Prim in danger. Haymitch and Finnick notice the expression is not a return of adoration, but pure anger. They both hold her hands. The camera is now pointed on her. She quickly recovers and puts back on her mask and smiles at the camera. Inside she is screaming, but on the outside she just looks like she is accepting the compliment and brushing off his school boy crush, because let's face it, what school boy in Panem doesn't have a crush on her now.

The crowd goes crazy with excitement. Peeta is definitely the most memorable tribute this year. He even left Caesar Flickerman speechless. When his buzzer goes off Caesar wishes him good luck, "You never know Peeta…If you win you just may have a shot." He recovers. The mentors and stylist are ushered out and back up to their district floors. Finnick goes up to twelve because he is more than a little mad at Peeta and knows Katniss and Haymitch are furious. A tribute has never been killed before the games or by their mentor, but there is a first time for everything.

Peeta is the last to arrive back to the floor. Effie, Portia and Rove have been ordered to bed. Cinna sits in a chair nonchalantly, like he is just relaxing. He knows how Peeta feels for Katniss so it wasn't much of a surprise, but he also knows that he needs to be there to diffuse the situation, be the voice of reason, because Katniss and Haymitch surely aren't and at this moment Finnick isn't either.

When Peeta steps off the elevator a very angry Haymitch is blocking his way. Haymitch grabs Peeta by the arm hard and drags him to the sitting area. "What the hell did you think you were doing bread boy?" Haymitch shouts. His face is red from anger as he towers over Peeta. Peeta shrinks down into the chair behind him, but doesn't stop looking at Haymitch in the eyes.

"I was answering the question honestly….just be happy I didn't go with my plan from yesterday." Peeta grumbles.

"You have probably made thinks that much worse for her!" Finnick yells as he points to Katniss.

Katniss clears her throat. They all look at her. She is calm and collected. She put her mask back on and is in mentor mode. "Peeta… I want you to go to bed…you have a long few weeks ahead of you and you won't be able to get much sleep in the arena. I will not see you in the morning as Haymitch and I leave for the mentor suites tonight. Cinna will be with you until the launch. Good luck." Her voice is monotone. Her body is stiff. Peeta nods and heads to his room.

Once Peeta is out of sight, Katniss ignore the two angry, pouting victors and walks over to Cinna. She smiles at him gently and places her hand on his cheek as she lowers herself onto his lap. "Cinna make sure he eats and drink in the launch center. And make sure you come right back to Haymitch's and mine suite so you can watch the games with us."

"Anything you want darling." He coos. She gives him and appreciative kiss and slowly gets off of him.

She walks to Haymitch and Finnick and stops in front of them. "Okay boys lets go. We need to get as much rest tonight as we can, because we won't probably sleep well… or as well as _we_ can… until the games end." She turns back to Cinna and gives him a real warm smile and walks to the elevator. They already had a bag each packed for the trip and the hovercraft would be waiting for them on the roof. The two men followed her, both turning around to say bye to Cinna.

Once in the hover craft Katniss lets go over the anger that has been pushed down. "Why would he say that? On national television no less! I mean he has already told me how he feels a couple of times, but the whole country? Is he stupid?" She rants, pacing in front of the two men. "And what plan did he have that he didn't go through with?"

"He wanted to announce he loved you publicly, but also out the fact that you were being kept in the Capitol not by choice." Haymitch whispers closely to her.

"He would have gotten _them_ killed!" she gasps.

"I know that's why I told he couldn't." Haymitch explains.

"And people think I'm stupid!" Finnick exclaims.

"I don't think he did too much damage though Sweetheart. He just said everyone else in Panem wanted you too…which is true." Haymitch tries to reason.

They all sit there and drink for an hour before they have calmed down enough. Finally Katniss stands up and walks to the room where they will sleep until they land tomorrow. When she gets to the door she turns to look at them, "Aren't you two coming?" She asks tiredly. They both get up and follow her into the room. She showers and changes into Finnick's dress shirt and lies in bed. Finnick showers and crawls in in his boxers and holds onto her waist, nuzzling her neck. Katniss turns so she can look Finnick in the eyes. "Finn, Johanna told me something that confused me slightly."

"What was it?" He asks back.

"She said that you loved me and that I even had the Annie seal of approval. I know you love me, but the way she said it….it made it sound like…I don't know…something more. Why would Annie give me a seal of approval?" Katniss asks nervously.

"Well….I just….I do love you. And Annie knows it… and well she wants me to be with you, because she knows I am happy around you." He whispers putting his lips mere millimeters away from hers.

"Oh. Why?" She whispers back.

"You stir something in me that has been dead for a long time." He says in a low voice. Katniss closes the distance between them. They kiss for a few minutes until they hear the shower cut off.

After Haymitch gets out of the shower he also comes to bed and wraps his arms over Katniss's stomach. He kisses her cheek lightly and they all actually sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 5

She wakes up feeling guilty. Finnick was pulling on her heart. For the first time she really felt bad for leading them on. The kiss her and Finnick shared last night was different. They would have never normally stopped just because Haymitch was getting out of the shower. It meant something more. She couldn't put her finger on it though.

She carefully crawled out of their embrace and got dressed. When she is almost to the door she hears them start to stir. She quickly takes a glance back and smiles at both of the men who keep her safe before she leaves them to find breakfast.

Finnick and Haymitch soon join her for breakfast and they sit and eat while guessing at what type of horrors would be inflicted on the tributes. "Well…from what one of my 'visitors' told me I can only assume it is meant for district four and it is going to be set up like a clock." Katniss states dryly. She knows Peeta and Rove have never swum before and unless the water is shallow they wouldn't make it very far. It's this comment that takes both Finnick and Haymitch back. They both give her an uneasy, shocked stare.

Haymitch clears his throat, "Sweetheart…was one of your 'visitors' a person who is in charge of the games?" she nods and he looks at Finnick, anger starting to smolder in his eyes. "Why didn't you tell me she had that high up of a client?" He snaps at Finnick. Finnick who is trying to rack his brains going through the list of all the men he had seen her with is coming up with no one who was a gamemaker. Katniss snaps her fingers to bring their attention back to her.

"Hay you can't get mad at Finnick. There were times when he was previously occupied and I had to leave. It didn't happen in front of him. I was escorted to the man's house." She looks at him then quickly down at her hands.

"Who was it Katniss?" Haymitch asks in a low growl.

"The one that fell in the punch bowl." She whispered.

Haymitch knew this man…he is planning a goddamned rebellion with him. How could he buy Katniss! His anger is pouring out of him. Katniss sees this and quickly begin telling him what had happened hoping it would calm his anger. "He was actually the best one. He didn't even touch me. He just wanted to talk to me. He asked me lots of questions about myself. But I stuck mostly to my act." She quickly spits out as if she is shooting water from a hose onto a fire. Haymitch calms. Finnick still looks confused, but relaxes at the news that the mystery man hadn't touched her.

When the hovercraft lands at the mentor viewing station there were two peacekeepers waiting for Katniss. "Follow us Ms. Everdeen." One guard demands. She looks back at Haymitch and Finnick, but turns to follow the guards. Finnick starts to follow. The second guard turns and glares at him, "She has been requested alone." He snarls. Finnick looks like he is getting ready to fight when he feels Haymitch's hand on his shoulder and sees Katniss's gray eyes pleading with him to stop. He nods and watches her leave with the two guards. He feels helpless, like a bigger kid just took his lunch money.

The guards lead Katniss to a private room. She once again smells him before she sees him. She wants to gag, but tries hard to keep her composure. "Good morning Ms. Everdeen." President Snow greets in a wickedly sweet voice.

"Good morning President Snow." Katniss responds pleasantly as if she is greeting a friend.

"I do hope your mentoring duties have not been too hard on you. I know the first year can be hard." He says like he is actually concerned for her well being.

"It has been fine." She answers politely.

"Good glad to hear it. Now obviously I did not call a meeting with you to discuss how mentoring has been going." He looks at her with his snake eyes narrowing. She nods that she understands this not a friendly check-in. So he continues, "That tribute of yours caused quite a stir in his interview last night…didn't he?" He looks at her expectantly.

She nods her head in agreement. She is still upset with Peeta and becoming more upset by the second as she sits in here with Snow. Snow sees her eyes flicker with anger and her face begins to become red. "I can see this news did not please you either. That is what I was hoping for. If he should win you are to reject his advances. The people seem to think it is cute…a love sick school boy, but they don't really want to give up their girl on fire to a baker's boy."

"I have never had any plans to reciprocate those sorts of feelings with Peeta. If I had…I would have before my victory tour when he first made his feeling aware. I am as shocked as the rest of the country that he said what he did during his interview." She looks at him with a hard stare, hoping he understands she want nothing to do with the game Peeta is trying to play.

"Good then. We don't have anything to worry about then do we?" He asks sinisterly.

"As long as _they_ are safe then, no." She says honestly. He nods at her in seriousness. The peacekeepers come back into the room and silently escort her to her suite.

After Katniss left with the peacekeepers Finnick and Haymitch head to District Twelve's suite. Haymitch turns to look Finnick in the eye. His normal scowl and sarcasm are gone from his face. He looks calmly sad. "You love her. Really love her. You aren't fine with her needing all three of us… are you?" He asks Finnick seriously. Finnick's sea green eyes sparkle as he thinks of her, but then look away and back quickly as to shake the longing out of his eyes.

"Yes Hay. When did you figure it out?" Finnick asks quietly.

Haymitch sighs, "It isn't like you really try to hide it, but you were jealous last night when the boy proclaimed his love for her. You have never had a look of jealousy before." Finnick nods, he has nothing to say. Every word Haymitch said is true. He was jealous, but not because of Peeta's feeling, but because he couldn't express those feelings out in public.

Haymitch looks at him a moment longer before he continues, "Well, we all feel the same way. So I guess we will just have to wait for her to make her decisions when she feels she can." He claps Finnick on the back.

Finnick gives him a sad grin, "Tell her I'll stop by later….I should probably act like a mentor for a while you know." He walks out the door down the hall passing eight doors until he reaches his own. Mags is in there waiting for him and she gives him a knowing smile as they sit and ready themselves for the show.

Katniss quietly comes in her suite and takes a seat next to Haymitch. He could feel her come in, but waits for her to speak first. "_They_ are safe." She exhales. He grabs her small soft hand in his larger one to comfort her. She looks over and asks playfully, but in seriousness, "So what do we do here?" she has a smirk on her face. She knows what they do here, they watch children kill each other, but since this is her first games as a mentor she wasn't sure what _she_ was supposed to be doing here.

Haymitch chuckles at her, "Well this screen," He sweeps his hand over the long wall, "Is where we watch our tributes. This computer," He points to the desk with a computer on it, "Is how we manage their sponsor support and get gifts to them. Just watch me. I'll never leave you to do it alone." He winks at her giving her a supportive smile.

The screen comes on and they see that Katniss's information was right. There is a long thin beach with jungle just beyond it. District Twelve kids would never even imagine that this kind of land exists. The cornucopia is just off shore. There are spokes of sand that jut out from it leading to the tributes plates. The tributes are up and most look confused by their surroundings. Sixty seconds later and the gong sounds. The District Four tributes are the first ones to the cornucopia; they grab nets, spears, knives and a trident. The other Career districts are soon on shore after and are grabbing the weapons they need as well. The six tributes ignore each other until they realize all that is at the cornucopia is weapons. They start to fight.

Slowly some of the other districts start making there way towards the horn, hoping to at least get one weapon while the six Careers battle it out. There is no real alliance between them this year. They are all too self-important to think they need someone else's help.

Rove is frozen in place, as Katniss had guessed he would be. Peeta, who had made it to the horn and gotten a belt of knives sees this and runs to get him. When he reaches Rove he grabs him by the arm and drags him through the waist high water until they get to the beach. He pulls him along through the jungle until they are both tired at are panting. They stop and look back. They hear the cannons going off, but can no longer see any action. Rove looks at Peeta, "T-t-thanks." He trembles. Peeta gives him a small smile and they walk to look for water and food.

Katniss notices the arena has no fresh water source and she knows unless they by some chance remember which nuts and berries aren't poisonous they won't survive for more than four or five days if they can stay hidden. Haymitch, who has read her mind once again, starts, "Well the trees there have water in them I'm sure." She looks at him quizzically, her eyebrow going up,

"Like some of the trees at home that have syrup?" She asks.

"Exactly." He grunts.

She thinks for a minute about how her father and she used to get the syrup from the trees and then she remembers the small silver thing they would stick into the trees to extract the syrup. "Can we send them a spile?" She asks. Haymitch looks at her like she is a mysterious genius. Sometimes he forgets what her life was like even before the games. She has always been a survivor.

They send them a spiel and it takes until nightfall before Peeta figures it out, but at least they have water now. Rove remembered his training and saw some nuts he knew would be safe. The boys set up a small camp for the night as the trumpets sound and the Seal of Panem goes across the sky. Then it shows the pictures and district numbers of the ones who died that day. There were quite a few, thirteen in all: half of the Careers (one from each district), both from three, both from five, one each from six and seven, one from nine, both from ten and one from eleven.

Katniss sighs as she is at least relieved that both of her tributes had made it past the first day. She goes to shower, but as she is finishing Haymitch comes barging in. "Fog" He gets out in a worried shout. She wraps the towel around her and runs into the room after him. What she sees on the screen in front of her looks like a wave of dense fog rolling onto the boys. Peeta is up and running pulling Rove behind, but Rove trips over a large root that is protruding from the ground. Katniss knows Peeta can't stop or try and carry him, but he does. Rove's foot is caught though and he can't budge. "Go!" he yells at Peeta and as Peeta leaves the young boy he salutes three fingers to him. He runs until he is back in the water. He can see at that the fog recedes at the jungle line and just as quickly as it came it went. Peeta's skin is burning him and his thin purple suit is tattered. The salt water is making him feel better and he immerses himself. He passes out from exhaustion at the edge of the water.

When Peeta wakes, Katniss and Haymitch send him some bread. They don't have enough for cream to stop his itching. They have more money for him than Haymitch has ever had most years, except last year with Katniss she had more money than he could possible spend on her in the arena. Peeta is grateful for the bread and starts walking down the beach.

When he gets a little further down three tributes start running out towards him followed by large rabid monkeys, mutts. He gets his knife at the ready and the boys fight off the monkeys two of the tributes die in the battle with the monkeys and after the monkeys retreat the third boy tries to fight Peeta. Peeta kills him while the boy was on top of him. It's his first real kill and Katniss knows how that feels. The first one is always the worst.

Katniss looks at the computer to see how many tributes are left. Five had died so far that day which means Peeta was now in the top eight. The press would be here soon to start the interviews. She wonders how his family and friends back home will respond for his interviews. She thinks his dad will be pleased and hopeful with a touch of sadness for his son. His mother probably won't even care she is a cold woman who is known for he physical abuse of her boys as well as verbal. His brothers will be fine she thinks, cheering him on. She wonders what friends will be interviewed.

Cinna snaps her out of her thoughts and tells her it is time for her to get made-up for her interviews. No body expects Haymitch to look like anything but disheveled so he does not have to get changed. Katniss on the other hand, is expected to continue being a living doll for the Capitol. Cinna and she come out of the dressing area, she is wearing a light blue silk dress it is short but fairly modest compared to what she normal wears. Her hair is done in the same style braid her mother used to do for her and she has only a touch of make-up.

"Katniss?" Caesar asks excitedly, "So how does it feel for your first tribute to be in the top eight?" Katniss smiles, but it doesn't quite reach her eyes.

"Wonderful. Peeta is doing very well." She gushes only slightly.

"And may I ask how you feel about his bombshell he dropped at his interview?" Caesar pushes eagerly. She knows she must play this right. She can't afford for Snow to think she has gone back on their agreement. Still smiling she speaks gently but firmly.

"Oh. Peeta just has some school boy crush. He doesn't really feel that way. I think he was just so overwhelmed by the Capitol." She pauses to let it sink in while she forms her next words very carefully. "I know I don't share those feelings. Don't get me wrong he is a nice boy, but he is just not my type." She finishes letting out the breath she had been holding. She hadn't really lied, at least not about her feelings.

"Oh Katniss!" Caesar fawns, "You have won the hearts of so many how could you possibly be expected to choose just one." He finishes. She is happy that the interview is over and that she had certainly put down any rumors that she may feel the same for Peeta as he does her.

Haymitch's interview went much quicker partly because he grunted his way through answers, but mostly because people really weren't as interested in him as they were Katniss.

Once they got back to their suite it was night already. The seal and trumpets were just coming up. Two more tributes died that day. All that leaves in one boy from Four, Six, Eight, Ten, Eleven and Peeta. She was nervous that Peeta would win. He is attractive enough; surely Snow would sell him too. Maybe not like her or Finnick, but he would have some buyers out there. It made her sick to think about.

The next two days in the arena go slowly. Peeta had figured out that it was a clock and made sure he moved with the time so he wouldn't get stuck in any one form of torture. Two more die and they are down to four.

Finnick comes in after his tribute dies; he drowned in a wave of blood. Ironic really. Mags and Johanna are also in their suite, as well as Cinna. Chaff still has his own tribute to watch after so he doesn't join. Most of the other victors just hang around until it is time for them to escort the dead tributes back home.

For some reason Katniss is all too aware of Finnick being there. It makes her stomach flitter as she feels his eyes on her. It's not a bad feeling, but one she hasn't felt before. She gets up to go to the bathroom and when she comes back in Finnick had decided to take her seat next to Haymitch. She walks over to him, arms crossed against her chest and a scowl on her face. "You are in my chair." She says impatiently.

Finnick reaches out to grab her waist and pull her into him. "I thought maybe we could share. I was getting lonely sitting by myself." He purrs. She rolls her eyes at him as he pulls her into his lap. She doesn't make any move to get out of his iron grip on her. She missed his touch the past few days and craved to be in his arms.

Johanna is almost nice to Katniss as they now talk like friends, well almost friends. They are both too messed up and deep down too hostile to be like normal friends. They are friends though in their own way. They express themselves in dry sarcasm that is laced with friendly feelings.

Katniss can still not understand anything Mags says, but the old woman babies her as if she is her own family. She makes sure Katniss eats and sleeps. Katniss knows Mags is like a second mother to Finnick and she wonders if this has to do with the same reason as why Annie gave her the seal of approval.

Cinna and Haymitch comfort her in their own ways. Cinna keeps calm as to keep her calm, he is her steadying force. Haymitch and she communicate without words. The others are amazed how seamlessly they work together and seem to know what the other is thinking and respond accordingly. It is just like in her own games last year when she and Haymitch would communicate without words, it really is a sight.

Johanna becomes increasingly aware of this oddity and finally says something. "What the hell?" Johanna asks after she had witnessed their third silent conversation. "Are you two telepathic? Or are you really the same freaking person?"

Both Haymitch and Katniss just start laughing. They had been trying to decide if they should send Peeta a bottle for water as he was having a hard time continually having to drain the trees and having no way to contain water for more than just immediate use. They had been looking back and forth at each other with serious twitches of the eyes and upturning or down turning of their lips and then they would look back at Peeta and the spile. Katniss finally went and sent him a bottle for his water and Haymitch nodded that she did good.

"Sorry Jo." Katniss begins, "We just don't find the need to waste words. We are doing just fine without them." She smirks at Johanna who rolls her eyes exasperatedly.

Finnick looks over at Johanna, "Yeah it really makes you wonder what they are saying about us, doesn't it?" He says teasingly.

"Yes Fish Boy. We have been talking about how if we get rid of you there will be one less body in this room." Haymitch tells Finnick mockingly. Finnick looks at Katniss for reassurance. He gets none, just a giggling young girl.

"What's so funny brainless?" Johanna asks sarcastically.

"N-nothing." Katniss starts trying to catch her breath. She is smiling at Haymitch. She knows he wishes it was just the two of them in the room and his poor attempt at a joke was just his wishful thinking.

They sit on the edge of their seats as they watch two more tributes get killed by the arena itself. It is down to Peeta and the tribute from eight. They are both on the beach. The tribute from eight starts running towards Peeta madly. He is delirious from lack of water and food. He just wants to go home. They start to wrestle and both boys fall into the water.

They wrestle, both nearing fatigue, for hours in the water. Neither has the upper hand, both just clinging to life as they seem to take turns pinning each other under the water. Finally, just as the sun goes down in the arena, a cannon sounds.

No one is sure who the victor is. Both boys are just lying in the water. Finally, a loud booming voice comes on, "Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present the victor of the Seventy-Fifth Quarter Quell…Mr. Peeta Mellark."

No one in the room cheers. It is not necessarily a happy thing to be a victor. Katniss knows this, but she is also proud that she has been able to keep him alive. Even more though, she is worried about how this will effect her. She wonders if he will make a fuss about winning to win her over. Or if he will be sold too.

Haymitch looks over at her, "Well who would have thought that after twenty three years of loosing I would start having a winning streak." Sarcasm rolling off his tongue. He is no more happy than she. He knows that bread boy won't give up his damned quest of Katniss. He just hopes the boy doesn't make anything harder on her.

She looks up at him and around at everyone else, "So was this how excited everyone was for me when I won? We should at least pretend to be happy; it's like a freaking funeral in here." She says half joking.

"No it was worse for you," Johanna starts, "You had these three here crying their freakin' eyes out like little babies. You would have thought you died….well considering…I guess death would be better." Johanna tries to comfort her. She feels how every victor feels when they bring home a new victor…terror and guilt, more guilt than when they die.

Peeta is taken to the hospital and it would be four days until he is allowed visitors, not until after he wakes up on the fourth day. They will be doing a full body gloss just like on Katniss to erase any imperfections and make him look sparkling and new, not like he had survived the hunger games.

President Snow paid Katniss and Finnick a visit informing them that they would be returning home for two weeks to either burry their tributes or present the victor.

Two weeks, Katniss thought. She is nervous. She is petrified at what the people of her district would say or think. She doesn't want to face them. She would almost rather stay in the Capitol as it would be far less emotionally painful. She will miss Finnick terribly, but at least she will have Haymitch and she guesses her things are still at his house as she had been living there before she left. And Gale…what is she going to do about Gale, she thought.

Finnick on the other hand, is excited to see his family. They are very understanding, but then again he has been at this for a lot longer and they caught on. But when he thinks of the two weeks he would spend without Katniss he almost doesn't want to go. He will miss her heart beat against his chest, the way she sings him to sleep and the way she feels in his arms.

All of the victors were escorted back to the training center to wait out the final ceremonies of the games. They all had to be present at the banquet, the day after they will leave and return to their homes to lay to rest the lucky ones who wouldn't have to live with the guilt, the terror or the continued games the president put on them.

"Haymitch do I still live with you…you know…back home?" Katniss asks quietly. She is unsure since she has not been home in nine months.

"What? You think I would just kick out your belongings just 'cause you moved away?" He responds sarcastically. He looks at her. She is sitting next to him on the couch. Her gray Seam eyes looking into his nervously. He sees the terror she has.

"I don't know." She responds quietly, twirling her braid in her hands, looking down now.

"I didn't move your things." He starts trying to show a little more compassion, "So if you still want to stay with me you are more than welcome…wherever I am you are always welcome." He lifts her chin so she is looking at him and he smiles at her, it even reaches is eyes and they look silver as they twinkle for her. She gives him a smile back and hugs him tightly.

After dinner Cinna comes in to take Katniss to get ready. She has a few more dates this week before she is to go home. Once they get in her room she hugs Cinna tightly and whispers in his ear, "I am sorry."

He pulls back looking at her questioningly, "Sorry for what darling?"

"For being selfish and needy. I know my constant need for you and Hay and Finn….well I know it bothers all of you. I can see it. I hear it in your voices. I don't want to be the cause of your pain Cinna. YOU are too good and kind." She looks at him her face soft but her eyes show sincerity.

He gives her a warm smile, "Darling, I will take whatever you give me and if now you need me, that is wonderful just like if later you choose I will be happy then too, no matter what the choice, because I only want to see your happiness." He pushes her hair from her face, "Now, come on, we need to shower and get you ready for your date."

Katniss feels the worst about Cinna, because Finnick and Haymitch have lived through most of what she has so they can understand her need for all three better. But Cinna, Cinna is from the Capitol. His heart is kind and pure, only love is in there. He doesn't know what is like to be sold, not really. He only feels the pain because he sees it in their eyes. He doesn't know what it is like to kill another child just so you can live. So she worries about his feelings with their arrangement more than the others.

Cinna dresses Katniss in a long golden yellow silk dress. It is backless and only has thin straps holding it up on her delicate shoulders. Despite the fact that she has regular meals she is still very thin. The neck hangs low and the dress falls over her body, accentuating her most valuable assets. He does her hair in loose waves and pulls it back and up slightly so it is not covering her back. Her make-up is light and golden in tone. She wears black and yellow diamonds for her jewels. She looks radiant. Like the sun.

Cinna stands back circling her, admiring her, his work. He hates his job. He hates having to play dress up with her so she can be sold to someone who is not worthy to be in her presence. But he loves his job too. He gets to be with her. He gets to show her real love before she has to leave. And that makes him love his job.

They walk out of her room and as usual Finnick is waiting for her. Since they are on official mentor duty time they do not stay in their "home". Finnick is always required to escort her to their dates as most of them during this time are joint. Katniss wonders how much someone has to pay to get both victors or maybe it's a two for the price of one deal. She guesses that since the joint dates are typically with more than one or two people, they all chip in.

Finnick gives a sexy smile when he sees her. He looks handsome she thinks. Finnick isn't required to wear quite as extravagant outfits, as his are normally tuxes with embellishments. She gives him the same smile back their eyes fixed on each other. Haymitch comes to stand next her and leans into her ear, "Be careful Sweetheart." He gives her a kiss on the cheek and she turns to him and smiles a sweet adoring smile. He is worried about her and she appreciates his kindness at this time.

Finnick holds out his arm for her and she takes it. "Don't worry about her, I've got her." He says looking over his shoulder giving a wide grin and waving at the two men seeing them off. Once they are in the elevator he wraps his arms around her, the feel of the barely there silk on her skin sends a shiver up his spin. "You feel nice tonight." his smooth voice whispering in her ear.

She leans back into him and relaxes some inhaling his sent, "I don't know how you do it, no matter how far from district four you are, you always smell like salt water and the sun." He chuckles at her observation.

He inhales her deeply and says, "Well you always smell like fire and mint." He loves her scent it is comforting like sitting around a fire place drinking mint tea. She giggles. They are interrupted when the doors open and the must untangle their stance and go back to being The Finnick Odair and Katniss Everdeen –The Girl on Fire.

That night, their date is with a group of five men. Katniss is the only woman. They mingle at a celebration for something ridiculous that the Capitol supports, like saving the rainbows. They are always so concerned with saving things that didn't need to be saved, but when it came to actual people nobody cared.

As the night wore on Katniss danced and flirted with the men, she was seductive. That night they all went to a suite in the hotel the benefit was being held. The men watch her and Finnick then they join in. Each man has his turn. There is no torture, just what felt like an endless amount of men enter her and bend her to their will. She plays along. She pleases them and when they were all done each one presents her with a gift of jewels. As always she gushes about how beautiful they are and how she can't accept such extravagant gifts. The men hand Finnick wads of money and he gives them a seductive grin of appreciation. They know how to play the game. They are pros; this has been their life, day in and day out of over half a year now.

Katniss and Finnick make their way back to the training center after their date. She is slightly sore as is Finnick. Haymitch and Cinna are awake when they get back along with Johanna. The three had been talking about how to get Peeta off of Katniss mania when he comes to. They know the boy thinks he loves her and wants to help, but the best way for him to help her is by forgetting Katniss ever existed. Finnick and Katniss are slightly surprised when they see the three of them still up or maybe they had just woken up, it is seven in the morning.

"If it isn't the Capitol's favorites: Fish Brains and Brainless." Johanna greets sarcastically. Finnick and Katniss are too tired to play so they just ignore the comment. Both of their eyes pronounce clearly that they are dead.

"So did you three actually sleep or did you stay up all night worrying over Kat?" Finnick asks wearily. He knows they wouldn't worry over him like they do her.

"You know how it is…with sleep….plus these two over here can't stop plotting away." Johanna answers them.

"Like you're any better Jo! You came running in here with five different ideas." Haymitch snaps back. He is grouchy; he was hoping they would have been home sooner. He looks at Katniss and then at Finnick with an inquiring look. Finnick just shakes his head and gives a dark chuckle,

"You don't really want to know Hay." Katniss lays down her jewels on the coffee table and Finnick lays down the money. They both head off to shower and sleep.

As they leave the room they hear Johanna say, "With as much loot as those two pull in surely they would be able to buy their own freedom!" she is astonished at the worth of what they had made in one night.

They shower together getting the dirt off one another. Then without bothering with clothes they lie in bed and sing songs of their homes. The others can hear them, but do not interrupt. They know that they need this to help them stay sane.

They wake that evening just in time for dinner. They don't bother dressing; just put a robe on so they wouldn't be naked either. They know that after dinner they will be taken to get made-up by their stylist for another date.

"Finn," Katniss whispers before they leave, "Thank you." She looks into his sea green eyes and placing her hand over his heart she leans up and kisses him sweetly. He pulls her closer and with a shimmer of happiness glinting in his eyes, kisses her more deeply. When they pull away they both blush.

"Anytime my lovely little flower." He whispers back. She smiles at him and they walk out to join the rest for dinner.

"What? We are no longer important enough to dress for Fish Boy." Haymitch starts.

"What I am required to dress, but Katniss you don't mind?" Finnick retorts.

"Now boys we already went over this…Finn and I decided that clothes were pointless since someone would be undressing us anyway….and I don't think anyone has a problem with me not being dressed….too bad I never got around to walking the floors naked before the games." Katniss jokes. Everyone at the table laughs. It seems that District Twelve is the official hangout of the victors when not being filled with tributes. Johanna, Blight, Chaff, Seeder, Beetee, Wiress, Mags and Cinna and even Brutus, Cashmere and Gloss are there.

If it weren't for the games the unique group of people in the room would have never met. They would have had no reason to, as no one is allowed to travel between districts unless it is official Capitol business. But somehow, here they all were, broken and used, but for some reason they kept in together for the most part. No one else would understand unless they too went through the horrors of the games, but even more these victors were stronger than most. Sure they had their weaknesses, like alcohol, but they were nothing compared to the majority of victors who killed themselves or became morphling addicts or had complete mental breaks like Annie. No the victors in this room had refused to let the Capitol completely break them. They were broken and their lives really weren't there own, but they didn't let the despair engulf them.

The next few days went by in much the same manner. The victors going off and doing their victor duties, if they had any, during the day and night, but every evening the same group had dinner together like a family. Katniss and Finnick would be out all night until the morning and come back to shower, sing each other to sleep and then sleep all day. At dinner they still didn't bother with clothes. Brutus and Chaff made sure that they let everyone know they didn't mind Katniss's dress for dinner. Haymitch rolled his eyes at this and Cinna chuckled to himself, who really would mind if Katniss decided not to wear clothes he thought. And everyone was so used to seeing Finnick naked after ten years that no one even batted a lash at him.

Katniss feels comforted by these people, who don't judge her, unlike everyone else she knows back home. She wishes she could just stay here with them and continue this twisted life, without the dates would be preferable, but she would take that indignity over the loathing she knew she would see in the eyes of the people in her district in a few days. These people were her new family.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. Sorry for any errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 6

On the fourth day after the games they are allowed to visit Peeta and escort him back to the training center where he will be getting ready for the crowning and watching of the games and then the banquet.

Everyone agrees it is better that Katniss stays at the training center, so Peeta doesn't get any false hope that she cares for him. Finnick and Johanna stay with her. Haymitch and Cinna, which is really going to piss Peeta off, go to collect him.

When Peeta comes to, he is lying in a hospital bed. He looks around and sees Haymitch and Cinna sitting in the two chairs across the room. He grunts. Soon both men are up and standing by his bed. Peeta slowly sits up and searches the room, for something, for someone. His eyes show disappointment when he doesn't see who he was looking for. Haymitch rolls his eyes and scowls at the boy. Cinna keeps up his demure practiced appearance.

"She didn't come?" Peeta finally breaks the silence.

"She is at the training center. We felt it best for her not to come." Cinna answers. They all know who she is.

"Why?" Peeta asks angrily as he feels like they are keeping her from him.

Haymitch, growing impatient, growls, "Look Bread Boy. Be happy you are alive! Get her out of your head, because so help me if you don't, you won't be alive for much longer."

Peeta stiffens, but comes back just as angry in a low voice, "Why? So you all can have her? So _they_ can have her? If you really cared for her as much as you pretend to then you wouldn't let her stay like this!"

Haymitch is losing it. He walks away and throws a chair at the wall. He is under strict orders from Katniss not to punch him again. "That little stunt you pulled in your interview only put her in that much more danger. So you need to forget her." Haymitch's face is red, he is leaning over Peeta. His eyes showing pure fire and hate in them. "I can't deal with this idiot anymore Cinna. Can you make sure he gets back?" Haymitch walks out of the room and heads back to the training center.

Cinna helps Peeta out of bed and hands him some clothes to put on. "Peeta, Please I beg of you, just stop with Katniss. You will only make things worse for her." Cinna's eyes plead with him and Peeta concedes.

When they get back to the training center Haymitch is on the couch grumbling something about idiot bread boys and drinking. Katniss is sitting with him and Finnick and Johanna. Cinna clears his throat as they make their way in. Katniss looks around and gives him a warm smile and then at Peeta only giving him a small smile. She doesn't hate him but is not happy with him. She is in so much fear for Prim and Annie that she can't show him any true kindness and let him believe she may even feel anything for him. Finnick stands up and outstretches his hand to Peeta with a wide grin on his face, "Congratulations Peeta!" he says cheerily. Johanna gets up and does the same, except far less cheery. Finnick heads back to where Katniss is sitting and kisses her on the cheek before he leaves. Johanna gives a blanketed grunt goodbye and they go back to their own floors.

Katniss stands and walks towards Peeta and Cinna. She sedately says, "Yes, congratulations Peeta. I am sorry to cut short but it is time for you to get ready for your closing ceremonies tonight." She nods at Cinna who leads Peeta back to his room. Peeta turns to look at Katniss one more time but she had already turned around and is almost to Haymitch again. He turns back around and hangs his head low as he follows Cinna. Cinna doesn't talk while getting him ready. The prep team rambles on and on, but Cinna's mouth stays closed. It isn't until Octavia mentions what Peeta will do to win Katniss over does Cinna show any emotion at all. He hides it quickly and waits to see what Peeta will say.

"Oh well. I don't know. Nothing." Peeta looks over at Cinna quickly. "I mean she is way out of my league, even before her games. That's not going to change now. I will just admire from afar." He finishes with a small self –deprecating smile.

Cinna relaxes at this and hopes the kid will keep up the act. Even though Peeta is the same age as Katniss, he is much more a child than she is. Even without her games, she was much more wise. Peeta, he thinks, is at least able to lie easily so that will do him well no doubt when Caesar asks him the same question. Cinna hopes, maybe since Snow doesn't want any of this that Caesar would be ordered to not mention it.

Katniss is able to calm Haymitch so he is at the very least not spewing curses at Peeta under his breath. When Cinna had finished with Peeta he gets Katniss and dresses her up. She again looks stunning as usual. Her dress is a sparkling black gown. Since the banquet will immediately follow the crowning, they needed to be ready to leave straight from there to the President's mansion.

Haymitch escorts Katniss as it is their mentor duties to be shown as a team. He never leaves her side. The crowd cheers when she comes on stage before Peeta. She waves and answers a few questions about how it feels to bring a tribute home her first year mentoring, nothing that would elude to his revelation before the games started. For this she was relieved.

Peeta comes on stage and is greeted by cheers as well. They watch the games again for three hours. They show the interviews from his family, friends and mentor. When he hears Katniss's interview his face saddens for a split second before he realizes he is on live TV. His father was tearful and wishing him luck, his mother was cold and preoccupied. His brothers and friends cheered him on. Haymitch presents the victor's crown to Peeta as he won the last quarter quell. President Snow did not make an appearance like he had for Katniss. He never came to these things, except for last year.

After, the group heads in a long black limo to the President's mansion. Just like in Katniss's banquet, Effie is introduces, then Cinna, then Haymitch and Katniss and finally Peeta. The crowd cheers for him. There isn't as much press and people are not as enamored with him as they were with Katniss. All night she is busy dancing with different men and talking with higher up people. People talk to Peeta, but they aren't as interested in him as they are about asking him about Katniss. He brushes them off with ease, never saying anything about his feelings towards her.

Katniss and Finnick have one more date that night after the banquet and when it is over they go back to his room instead of back to District Twelve's floor. They want to spend this last bit of time alone together. They will miss each other. They shower, make love and then sing each other to sleep. Finnick wakes before her and he watches the small girl in his arms, a smile across his face as she seems so peaceful. He knows Haymitch is probably up worrying about where she is, but it is still early morning and she wouldn't have to be upstairs for another hour. He plays with her dark silky hair as she sleeps against his chest. He kisses the top of her head and then pulls her up towards him. He leaves a trail of kisses from her temple to her lips. She smiles as she wakes and involuntarily clings to him. She loves the way he smells and tastes, like salt water and the sun, it reminds her of being at the beach in District Four, one of her happiest memories. She can't get enough of his large warm hands on her body. Each touch makes the butterflies in her stomach flutter like they are dancing around a May pole. They begrudgingly get out of bed and get dressed, she puts on a robe and he changes into the clothes he will be wearing on the train. "I'm going to miss you, you know?" He says quietly.

"Me too." She hums. They kiss one more time before she heads back to her floor.

When she gets up there Haymitch, Cinna and Peeta are waiting on her. Her face is relaxed and she is calm. They notice she is not in her dress but in a robe. "Decided not to come here after Sweetheart?" Haymitch says slightly bitterly. He is jealous, but knows she needs to do what helps her.

"Yeah. Just wanted to say bye to Finn." She looks at him, "It will be strange not seeing him everyday. You know?"

"Yea…I know." Haymitch admits. "Well you better get dressed. We have Peeta's interview and then we board the train. Effie is trying to keep a schedule." He gives her a smirk. She just smiles back and goes with Cinna to quickly change into a simple brown skirt with light purple Katniss flowers on it and a fitted sweater shirt that is the same color as the flowers. It is really simple compared to the other outfits she has gotten used to wearing, but she would be going home and they needed to leave the sexpot look in the Capitol. This made Katniss feel a little more comfortable.

Peeta is dressed in a navy blue suit with a light blue shirt. It brings out his blue eyes and makes them pop more than they normally do. The interview goes seamlessly. Caesar never mentions Katniss, even though the audience at home is probably dying to know. It is quick and before they know it they are on the train eating lunch. Haymitch and Katniss sit on one side of the table Effie is at the head and Cinna and Peeta are on the other side. As Cinna is Katniss's personal stylist, on top of being the tribute stylists, he is required to go wherever Katniss goes.

Finnick sits on his train thinking about Katniss. Mags knows it and tries to get his mind off of her, but knows it's of no use. She knows he is completely gone over that young girl. She is happy that Katniss has brought him so much joy in his pathetic excuse of life. It's not that he is pathetic, just the situation. Mags feels for him, she loves him like a mother.

"Mags," Finnick starts as the eat dinner. "What do you think of Katniss?"

"She is lovely and brave just like you dear…I don't think you could ever wish to do better." Mags responds in garbled speech. She gives him a gummy smile and pats his arm. He nods and sighs happily.

"You know…it's sick…I miss her so much that I almost want to be back with her in my arms in our Capitol 'home'." He admits embarrassed that he would rather be in that prison than at home, just so he could be near Katniss. Mags gives him a sympathetic look and shakes her head at him. She wants so badly for him and Katniss to have a future outside of the Capitol, to have their own lives.

After lunch Katniss and Haymitch drink and play cards. Peeta observes them. He notices they rarely speak, but seem to be having a conversation. Cinna notices and comes over to him. "If you are wondering, they _are _having a conversation." Peeta jumps a little as he is startled by the sudden sound of a voice.

He looks at Cinna skeptically. "How?" he asks, "They haven't said more than three words in an hour." Cinna gives a soft laugh. He knows how ridiculous it is, but when two people are as similar as Haymitch and Katniss in almost every way, it happens. The other person becomes part of you, an extension like another arm. He thinks that if she was Haymitch's age and they had met when they were younger they would have married.

"They are so similar and so much a part of each other like an arm or leg that they just can." Cinna tells him. Peeta nods and goes back to watching them.

Katniss feels Peeta's eyes on her. She has tried to ignore them for the last hour, but they don't leave. She looks at Haymitch quickly and then turns around to see Peeta and Cinna standing off in the corner. "Why don't you boys join us, instead of boring holes into the back of my skull?" She has a smirk on her face. The look on Peeta's face is embarrassment. He knows he has been caught. Haymitch and her laugh at the look on his face. Peeta shakes his head and Cinna and he go over to the other two.

Peeta looks over at Katniss as he sits. She is sipping her drink, white liquor, and studying her cards. "Katniss, I am sorry if I made things worse for you. Please let me know if I can do anything to make it up." He says assuredly. She glances over in his direction and turns one side of her lip up.

"Just don't say anything more about me." She says pointedly. He nods his head in assent. The rest of the day goes quickly as they play cards.

After dinner they all go to bed. Katniss goes with Haymitch and they fall asleep quickly in each others arms. Cinna has an idea though and he will need Peeta's help. He knows that Gale is on Katniss's mind and is one of the biggest worries she has with coming home, but as he cannot go to speak to him, he needs Peeta to.

Cinna knocks on Peeta's door. Peeta groggily answers. "Is it time to get up already?" Peeta asks sleepily, his hair is tousled and his clothes are wrinkled.

"No. I am sorry to disturb you, but I need your help with something….for Katniss." Cinna tells him in a hushed tone.

"Anything." Peeta says excitedly. He would do anything to help her. Just because he wasn't allowed to acknowledge he loves her doesn't mean he has stopped. Cinna looks him over once then starts to tell Peeta his plan.

"You know Gale. Well I know he is on Katniss's mind and she is worried about him and about how the district will look at her when she returns." He pauses seeing if Peeta is following. "I need you to talk to Gale let him know what you saw and what you know about Katniss. It hurts her deeply, because he is one of the ones she does this for so he will be safe." Peeta nods.

He is thinking about this. "How will I get him to talk to me?" He finally asks.

"I will have Prim and Rory bring him to Katniss's old house in the Seam and you will be there. We will have to do it in the morning when he is still hung over and more likely to comply….Haymitch has kept me abreast of the situation." He says.

"Okay…When?" Peeta asks as he tries to figure out the plan perfectly so he doesn't screw it up.

"The day after tomorrow. If you sneak out of your house early enough the press won't bother to follow you, they won't be up." Cinna tells him. He can see Peeta thinking this through.

"Okay I will. Anything to make things easier on her." Peeta states with a resolved smile.

The next morning they eat breakfast quietly as Effie explains the schedule for the day. First they will greet the press; this is when they will present Peeta as Victor. Then there will be the public welcome home, where Peeta will be reunited with his family. Next he will be presented his mansion in the victor's village and lastly there will be the feast in the town square. President Snow had not come to him to request the same as he had from Katniss so he would actually be able to enjoy it. Katniss will not be able to enjoy this feast as she will be flanked with Haymitch and peacekeepers. She requires higher security than most victors. Her detail when out of the Capitol is almost as big as the President's.

After breakfast they all changed into their attire for the day. Katniss is in another fitted sweater and skirt set. This time it is a light blue skirt with white Primroses and a white top. Peeta is in a black suit with a white shirt as is Haymitch. Effie has changed her wig yet again and it is now light blue and her makeup and outfit match accordingly. Cinna wears all back as usual, the only thing "Capitol" being his thin gold eyeliner.

Once they are all ready, they wait by the doors for them to open. When they do open, Effie steps out first to direct. Peeta follow her and he is followed by Katniss and Haymitch. Cinna will meet them back in the victor's village.

Katniss and Haymitch say their scripted speeches about Peeta and introduce him. Then they give their scripted condolences to Rove's family. Peeta also gives his condolences to Rove's family and his appreciation for his victory. Effie leads him off stage where his family waits to greet him. His father hugs him tightly and cries and smiles. Soon his brothers are piled on top. They are all so happy and full of life. His mother stands to the side. She is not smiling, she just glares at Katniss.

Katniss has five peacekeepers and Haymitch around her. She looks for Prim and when she finally sees her she starts to take off only to be grabbed by one of the peacekeepers roughly. "You need to stay with us at all times Ms. Everdeen." He snaps. She glares back at him with a scowl on her face and then slowly makes her way to her sister.

As she walks she mutters under her breath, "Is this slow enough for you?" Haymitch hears and gives her a smirk.

Soon Prim and she are hugging. She can't believe how big she has gotten in the last nine months. She is as tall as Katniss and is filling out well. She is much curvier than Katniss was at thirteen. Hazelle, Rory, Vick and Posy are standing behind Prim and when Katniss finally lets go of her sister she hugs and kisses each of them. They all look better fed and healthier. She feels proud that she is able to help them not starve. Once again her mother and Gale are missing. She didn't expect them to show. She holds her embrace to Hazelle for a long time, as Hazelle was more of a mother to her the last few years than her own was. Hazelle lets out a few tears as she is relieved to see Katniss.

Once all the greetings are done, they head to the victor's village to present Peeta with his own mansion. Even though she is flanked by peacekeepers it doesn't keep Peeta's mother from making horrible comments about her. Haymitch is getting angry that this woman is ignoring her own son and choosing to ridicule Katniss, the person who helped keep her son alive. Peeta's mother announces as they reach his mansion, "We will not be living here with Peeta and I would hope he will return with us to the family home, as I do not want to live near or associate with the Seam trash that lives here and the vile things I have heard go on here are not appropriate for my son."

What happens next surprises everyone. One of the peacekeepers who is assigned to Katniss is Darius and he along with Haymitch and Peeta were getting tired of her running her mouth. "Well then Mrs. Mellark, I guess I will be escorting you back to your house now as you are now on the suspect list and are banned from all public areas until the lovely Ms. Everdeen is safely away." When he finishes he grabs her harshly by the arm and drags her back to town. She is ranting and raving about the injustice.

Peeta smirks, but quickly wipes it off his face. Somehow that had felt like justice for him. His mother had yet to even acknowledge him and was going off about Katniss. He is happy she is banned for all public areas that would even include the bakery. She will have to stay upstairs in their house the whole two weeks.

Katniss feels bad for Peeta over the incident, but is so happy that Darius had stuck up for her. She thought about what Haymitch had told her after she won her games about Darius liking her and she realized it must be true. The other peacekeepers were surely getting tired of the ranting, but only Darius has forcibly removed the woman.

Haymitch is proud of Darius and happy that the evil woman wouldn't be able to bother Katniss. He feels like it is somehow payback for all the years she has been a horrible bitch about the people of the Seam and this will hopefully put her in her place.

Peeta and his dad and brothers explore his new house. They had put in a kitchen that puts the bakery to shame. His house is also decorated to what _they_ thought his taste were, just like they had with Katniss. Other than the kitchen and decorations it is exactly like Katniss's and Haymitch's.

Katniss's mother stands out on the porch watching the circus across the street. She sees her oldest daughter surrounded by peacekeepers and Haymitch. She grows angrier. She feels like he stole her daughter from her, because he wanted her. She never liked him before, but now she loathes him. Katniss looks over towards her, a stone stare. She no longer has any emotions towards her mother. Her mother had died the day her father had and now she was really and truly gone from her life. She feels no need to see her or speak to her.

Prim holds Katniss's hand as they walk around. Prim is her reason to keep going, her only real reason. If she was to drop dead of course Haymitch, Cinna and Finnick would be devastated, but they wouldn't die without her. She thinks that even President Snow would mourn her more than her own mother…or even Gale. Hazelle would surely grieve, but she and the kids would survive. Haymitch would make sure of it. Prim is the only reason she continues on.

When Finnick makes it home everyone is happy to see him. He does the traditional condolences for District Four and makes his way back home with his family. Annie is with them and all she wants to know about is how Katniss is.

"She's good Annie. She told me to give you a hug and let you know she is doing her best to take care of me." He smiles at Annie when he talks to her. She is so much like a small child, so innocent.

"Good. Will she come visit again? I hope she will. How are you Finn?" She prattles happily.

"I am good too. I don't know if she will be able to visit again. I'm sure she will if she can. How have you been?" He asks.

"I've been good. I have a crush though." She admits shyly. Finnick looks at her skeptically. He is surprised and happy. All he wants for Annie is happiness.

"Oh you do, do you? And may I ask who this crush is on?" He inquires teasingly.

"You've met him…. He has the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen. I can't wait for the victory tour." She chirps. It takes him a minute before he realizes she has a crush on Peeta. He chuckles.

"I'm sure he will love to meet you too. He is a nice kid." Finnick tells her.

"I know! He has such a kind heart. In his games when he went to get his district partner…well that's what did me in." She squeals. Finnick is so happy that she is happy. He knows nothing will ever really come of this crush since Annie is like a twelve year old girl with a crush not like the twenty-two year old that she is, but he wants her to enjoy the feeling.

That night Peeta delivers his scripted speech before the feast. He sits near his brothers and father. Everyone in the whole district eats very well and it is joyous celebration. Peeta dances with several girls from school and jokes with his friends. By looking at him you would never think he had just gotten home from the games. He isn't showing the emotional distress that Katniss had. Then again he doesn't have to deal with what Katniss deals with. She hope his carefree attitude goes into his sleep too. She knows eventually he won't be able to escape the nightmares about the ones you have killed, the ones you watched die.

Katniss and Haymitch stand off to the side with the peacekeepers. Neither of them want to celebrate, but they are required to be there and look somewhat happy. It helps that Peeta looks happy. It also helps that Darius is standing next to them making jokes. He seems truly happy to have Katniss back home. He is one of the few. Most people in the district look down their nose at Katniss and barely acknowledge her presence. Greasy Sae had hugged her when she saw her and asked if she would be visiting the Hob. Only Peeta's dad, who came up to thank her for bringing him home safely, and Delly Cartwright, who squeezed Katniss and cried that she was so happy Peeta made it home, approached her during the feast. Small children would point excitedly as they passed her, because to them she was the living dream. She made it out of the Seam, out of District Twelve and is living the Capitol life.

"I can't speak for others, but I am happy to see you alive and in one piece." Darius coos in her ear. She laughs quietly at this.

"I'm sure you are….are you going to try to sell me on your kisses again?" She teases back. Haymitch smiles at the exchange, happy that someone is making her return better.

"Oh if you didn't take me up on the offer before I don't think I would be able to pay you for them now." He says jokingly. Katniss knows he is joking but she burst out in tears. She turns into Haymitch and he holds her to him. He knows Darius didn't mean anything by it. It was the way they had always joked about his kisses. He would try to get her to trade a rabbit for kisses, which in District Twelve a rabbit is better than money.

"Darius, I think this has been too much excitement for Katniss can we please escort her back home now?" He asks sternly. Darius nods his head quickly and the convoy starts to make its way back to the victor's village. Katniss keeps her head down and towards Haymitch as he leads her.

Peeta notices the group moving away and gives Haymitch a questioning look. Haymitch just shakes his head and waves the boy back to his festivities. Peeta worries about her, but knows if he leaves it would look bad for her.

Cinna talks secretively to Prim and Rory at the feast, both kids look at him skeptically, but agree to do anything to help make Katniss happy. Cinna is relieved and heads back to the house that he and Effie will be sharing the remainder of the trip. It is the guest house on Haymitch's property, as Katniss no longer lives with her mother. Even though the house is registered in Katniss's name, she would never kick Prim out.

When they get back to the Victor's village Haymitch dismisses all of the peacekeepers at the gate and only takes Darius with them towards his house.

"Darius, there are some things that cannot be known." Haymitch looks him up and down before continuing, "For one Katniss lives at my house…she and her mother don't see eye to eye on some things. For two, no more joking about buying of Katniss ever again. She has become sensitive to that sort of talk. Do we have an understanding?" His words are forceful.

"Yes sir. Of course sir. And Katniss," He looks at the girl he has teased since she was thirteen and no longer looking like a child, "I am so sorry to have upset you. You know I didn't mean it." His words are sweet and kind. She nods and gives him a sad smile.

Once they are inside, Darius goes back to his group. They will be staying in the security house at the front of the village. After Haymitch shuts the door he gets a bottle of liquor and leads Katniss to the couch. They sit there and drink in silence. She is in his lap and he kisses her head in between sips. After hours of sitting like this they head to bed. She removes her clothes and gets into bed in her underwear. Haymitch does the same. Once in bed they start kissing. She needs to feel love. Today has been a hard day for her and she craves his loving touch. They end up making love. He puts all the love he feels for her into it and hopes that at least for tonight she feels loved. They fall asleep in each others arms neither one has nightmares. Neither one wants to ever let this feeling go.

Haymitch knows he only has Katniss for as long as she will have him. He also knows that their bond goes beyond being "in" love. No matter whom she chooses Haymitch will always be with her as well. The physical part of their relationship may end, but not the mental or emotional, that is too deep to ever be cut.

Early the next morning Peeta leaves his house and heads for Katniss's old Seam house. Prim had already left to meet Rory and convince Gale to follow them. It shouldn't be too hard he is normally pretty easy to control first thing in the morning as he is still hung-over.

"Gale," Prim pleads, "Please come with us, there is something we want to show you back at my old house." Gale grunts, but gets up and puts on a shirt and his shoes. Prim feels relieved he is coming.

"What is it?" He grumbles.

"Oh we're not sure that's why we need you to look at it." Rory covers. Gale slowly shakes his head and mutters something incoherent under his breath. He looks like he has aged ten years in the last year. He looks like Haymitch.

When they reach the house and walk in Gale becomes mad. "What? Bread Boy here needs to lose his virginity too so he comes to me?" Gale fumes.

"Gale please just listen to him." Prim pleads, her big blue eyes brimming with tears. Gale sighs in defeat. He knows he can't say no to her. She is like a little sister to him. He can no better deny her than Posy.

"Well? I'm listening." He snaps at Peeta. Peeta looks at Prim and Rory.

"Prim, Rory…I don't think you should stay for this conversation. It may be traumatizing for you." He hopes they will leave. He can't tell Katniss's sister that she is held prisoner and forced to have sex and be tortured.

Prim sensing that it would be better pulls Rory out, before she closes the door she looks at Gale and very sternly tells him, "Be nice." She then shuts the door behind her and walks off with Rory. Gale falls into the chair that is across from Peeta and glares at him.

"Gale," Peeta starts, "I have been asked to make some things clear to you about Katniss. You need to keep your mouth shut until I tell you I am done. You need to listen to every word I say and picture everything I am describing. Can you do that?" Gale nods, still glaring at Peeta.

Peeta explains everything he was told and everything he saw. He gives a very detailed account of the marks on Katniss's body and the dead look in her eyes. He explains what Cinna had told him about Katniss and her relations to the three men and even what he had mentioned about Gale. As he speaks Gales face softens and hardens. He is angry at the Capitol. He is angry at himself, but more than anything he feels so bad that he wasn't there for Katniss that he had turned his back on her. She had warned him and he promised to be there but wasn't. And Gale Hawthorne did the unthinkable he sobbed. His heart was broken, not because he thought the love of his life had left him to be a Capitol slut, but because the love of his life was doing all of this just to save Prim and himself. Peeta answers whatever questions he can and then leaves Gale by himself as he needs to get back before the press are up and notice him missing.

Gale stays in Katniss's house. The one they had made love in. The one where she had warned him, tried to prepare him. He didn't drink that day. He didn't sleep with anyone that day. He sobbed all day.

Peeta informs Hazelle of the situation and when she gets off work she goes to the house she knows he will be at. She pulls her son into a tight embrace and comforts him. He feels so ashamed. Even his own mother had tried to explain, but he was too stubborn to listen. She tells him that Katniss is living at Haymitch's house and maybe he should pay his cousin a visit tomorrow after he gets cleaned up.

"You wouldn't want her to see you like this…it would just hurt her more. She has sacrificed everything to protect Prim and you as well. She and Haymitch have supported our family this whole year, because she loves you, us. Don't let her see it has been a waste. Don't let her feel like one of her only reasons for going on is wasting his life in a bottle and in the bed of any woman who walks by. Show her, her best friend." Gale nods slowly to his mother.

"How will she ever forgive me?" he asks.

"You know she will. It may take her a little time, but she will. She has been hurt more by you than her own mother shunning her. And trust me I have chewed out her mother on several occasions. I agree with Haymitch she is a weak excuse of a woman. Katniss got everything she is from her father." They get up and go back to their house. Gale has a real bath and shaves. He even cleans his best clothes and lays them out for in the morning.

After Prim and Rory left Gale and Peeta she went to Haymitch's house to spend the day with Katniss. They play cards and talk Katniss holds her sister every chance she gets. Prim and Rory have started dating and Prim is so excited. Katniss cries a little as she sees how wonderful her sister is growing up to be. She wishes she could watch her sister grow up, but she knows if she wants her sister to get the chance to grow up she won't be able to watch. Even though she is spending time with her sister who she has missed more than anything, Katniss can't stop thinking about Finnick. Her heart pulls each time she thinks about him. Her feelings for him are different from the feelings she has for Cinna or Haymitch or even Gale. Yes she loves each one of them, but she longs for Finnick. She still needs the others though for now.

After they ate dinner and Prim went home, Katniss and Haymitch drink and play cards with Effie and Cinna. The drinking and the card games help them to get through the constant down time. There is a knock on the front door that startles both of them. They have their knives out as they aren't expecting anyone. Cinna and Effie roll their eyes at the two paranoid victors.

"Who's there?" Haymitch shouts.

"It's me Peeta." Peeta calls through the door.

"Come in." He shouts back. Peeta carefully opens the door, "Hello?" he calls.

"Yea back in the kitchen." Katniss calls back. Peeta makes his way back there and sees the four of them playing cards. He sits down next to Katniss and on the next round without even asking if he wants to play she deals him in. As they play they joke and talk about superficial things like who was wearing the wrong outfit for the season back in the Capitol. Peeta stays fairly quiet and takes in the conversation. He can't relate.

After Effie and Cinna leave to go back to their guest quarters, Peeta asks, "So is it normal to wake up screaming your head off every time you go to sleep?" Katniss and Haymitch look at each other and then back to him, before Haymitch responds.

"Yeah. You must not scream as loud as this one…some nights I could hear her all the way from her house in the Seam."

"I stayed there after the press left because I hated burdening Prim and Hay with my screams." Katniss adds.

"Do they ever go away?" Peeta asks tiredly.

"No." the both respond dryly.

"Does anything help?" He pushes hoping there is a way to help himself.

"Depends," Katniss starts, "Some people prefer morphling, some alcohol, some sleep in bed with others so that someone is there to wake them before it gets too bad and some don't sleep until they are beyond exhaustion and wouldn't be able to wake from a dream even if it was bad. But then there are those who kill themselves to get away…that is the most permanent solution." Her face and tone are stone. It sends a chill up Peeta's back.

"Is that why you stay with Haymitch?" He inquires.

"Partly" She glances at Haymitch with a slight smirk, "Partly because Haymitch has been there for me and cared for me more than my mother has in the past six years." She responds coolly.

"If it will help you…you can sleep in the guest room." Haymitch offers, not because he is particularly found of Peeta staying here but he knows how hard it is on your own.

"No I don't think it will look good for all three victors staying in the same house while the press is still here." Peeta says after taking in the offer. Katniss and Haymitch nod their heads in understanding. Soon, Peeta leaves to go back to his house and Katniss and Haymitch go to bed as well.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. Sorry for any errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 7

The next morning Gale wakes up and takes another bath, just to make sure he looks his best for Katniss. He eats breakfast, does his hair and carefully dresses himself in his nicest clothes. He needs her to know he is serious. He also gets the necklace he had made her that he was going to give her before Odair showed up.

He walks to Haymitch's house. It bothers him that she lives with Haymitch, but after everything she goes through and her mom he tries to understand now. He is nervous, more nervous than he has ever been in his entire life.

When he gets to the house he knocks and waits for a few minutes, but gets no answer. He knocks again and waits with still no answer. He is getting frustrated. A friendly voice call from around the house, "They won't be up yet." The voice says as it comes closer, he recognizes the person as her stylist, Cinna. "The door is always unlocked though." Cinna says with a warm smile. Gale doesn't understand why the man in front of him is being so nice. He should hate Gale for hurting Katniss.

"Thank you." Gale says as he turns the handle.

"Don't get upset if you see something that may not sit well with you… remember all she has been dealing with….it's what I have to do." Cinna reminds him carefully. Gale nods as he pushes the door open.

Once in he closes the door he calls, "Katniss. Are you up?" She hears his voice. She thinks it is a dream.

Haymitch hears it too and grabs his knife from under his pillow. He kisses Katniss, "Sweetheart get up…we have company." She turns and grabs her knife out of instinct as well. She puts on Haymitch's dress shirt that he had hung over the chair from when they first arrived back. Haymitch pulls on a pair of pants and they make their way down stairs.

"Katniss are you up stairs?" Gale calls from the bottom step. She walks onto the top one just as he finishes.

"Oh" she says. She looks like a startled deer. Her eyes have grown larger and almost swallow up her face. Haymitch places his hand on her shoulder as he sees who is down there.

They both make their way down. "Are you here to finish me off boy?" Haymitch snorts.

Gale scowls at him, "No. I came to see Catnip." he says shortly, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Haymitch grunts. He doesn't want this boy here; he will just make Katniss feel worse. "Catnip can we talk alone?" Gale asks hesitantly.

She looks back at Haymitch and his eyes falter just enough for her to read his thoughts about this; he clearly is not for it. She looks him in the eyes telling him that she will be fine. "Well if you need me I'll just be upstairs." Haymitch says more for Gale than Katniss.

"Thanks Hay." Katniss replies.

They sit at the table in the kitchen. There are fresh cheese rolls from the bakery. She guesses Peeta must have brought them over while they were still asleep.

"Finally decided to crawl out of whatever bottle you were in." She quips. He deserves it. She looks at him, he has aged, but he is still handsome. It is really remarkable to her how much he and Haymitch actually look alike. They are all very similar in personality too. He clears his throat.

"Yes. Someone told me I should be here groveling for forgiveness instead of drinking and doing… other things to get my mind off of you." He looks away ashamed.

"Really? And what things were said to make you realize you should?" she glares at him. She hopes no one told him about the horrible things she does.

"Look I don't want to lie and I am more than grateful for the person who shared things with me. I was told the actual truth, word for word. I was told about the marks, about the 'dates' and about your relationship with Haymitch, your stylist and pretty boy Odair." He says. Her eyes flash anger when he says Finnick's name with disgust.

"Oh. And what makes you think I wanted you to know any of that?" She scoffs at him.

"I know you didn't want me to know, but I am glad I know." He says back. He sees she is getting angry. Her fists are clenching in her lap.

"It doesn't matter you still lied! You lied to me! You promised you would always be there for me and YOU lied!" She screams. "It doesn't matter that you know now….it doesn't matter because you turned your back on me." She is breathing hard, her whole body shaking with rage. "I tried to tell you…but you couldn't see past your own fucking ego to trust me or even know me. WE were best friends for years and you still jumped to conclusions." She gets up and starts pacing back and forth, clenching her fists and jaw. Her nails are digging into her palms and are starting to cut the skin.

Gale knows he screwed up. Everything she said is right. He stands up and walks over to her. She tenses and flinches as he wraps his arms around her and whispers, "I'm sorry." over and over again in her ear. His tears falling down his face help her to finally relax. Only then does she realize she has cut her hands. There is thin trail of blood coming out of each cut and down her fingers.

Gale grabs her hands and pulls her to the sink to wash them out. "Haymitch," He yells, "Do you have a first aid kit?" Haymitch comes running down the stairs with a small kit from the bathroom.

When he sees her hands he starts screaming at Gale, "What the hell happened boy? Why are her hands cut and bleeding? I knew I shouldn't have left her alone with you."

Once Katniss's hands are bandaged she interrupts his rant. "Hay, I did this to myself….I just got so mad and humiliated that someone spelled everything out to him and told him about my marks." At this she began crying and fell into Haymitch's arms.

"Katniss I am so sorry. Please what can I do for you to forgive me? I owe you so much." Gales says quietly while rubbing her back. He doesn't necessarily like being this close to Haymitch, but she is in Haymitch's arms he wants to comfort her.

She pulls herself from Haymitch's arms and looks at Gale. Her eyes are red with tears. "Gale I will always love you, and one day after a while I will forgive you, but please… you are just going to have to prove I can trust you again." He nods and she steps closer to him and gives him a hug. He wraps his arms around her delicate form. He pulls her in tightly like if he gives her any room she may disappear on him.

Haymitch sits down at the table and starts to eat the rolls. He watches them come back together. If she never went to the games they would've gotten married, he thinks. It almost breaks his heart, because it reminds him of the girl he left behind and failed to protect. Katniss was better than him, she protects without a second thought. That was something that took him twenty-four years to find the ability to do. If Snow would give him a way to protect Katniss he would in a heartbeat.

Katniss and Gale finally let each other go and move to the couch. They talk about what has been going on in the district. Gale tells her about working in the mines, what he can remember of it any way. They talk about the district and life there until dinner time. His mother and the other kids stay for dinner along with Prim. Katniss tell them what her home in the Capitol looks like, about the parties and benefits she attends, about the ridiculous outfits and extravagant gifts. Katniss never mention what she does to get those gifts, because the real gifts that she does those things for were right with her at that time.

After dinner the Hawthornes go to leave. Gale turns, with a big smile, and eagerly asks, "Do you want to go hunting tomorrow morning?" Katniss looks down. She want to go, but knows she will never be able to again.

Katniss shakes her head no slowly, "I can't…I can't leave this property without five peacekeepers with me." Even when she isn't in the Capitol she is still in a prison.

"Oh. I'm sorry…I should have known." He says sadly as he realizes things will never go back to the way they were before the games.

"Bye" Katniss gives him a small smile and waves as Haymitch places his arm around her shoulder offering her moral support.

"Okay… bye… maybe I'll stop by then." Gale says and he walks out with his family.

That night Cinna and Effie and Peeta come over to play cards with them while Katniss and Haymitch drink. They don't drink a lot, but enough to help numb the pain. She knows she is weak for wanting it, but doesn't care anymore. Katniss figured out who told Gale and then who set him up. She glares and scowls at Cinna and Peeta all night until they finally fess up to it. Once they do she forgives them, but warns them to never do it again or she will personally see to their deaths, which she is only half kidding about.

Finnick loves spending time with his family and Annie. During the day they keep him busy enough that his longing for Katniss doesn't completely break him, but at night he can't stand not to have her near. He feels weak for feeling this way. _I am_ _The Finnick Odair!_ He thinks to himself, _I am supposed to be wanted not wanting._ But he is wanting badly. He would rather have whatever they could have in their prison in the Capitol than not have her at all. He feels sick for it, because he would really and truly rather her not have any of it, just be a normal happy girl.

By the third night without her he can't take it any more. He breaks down and decides to call her. He knows better than to try her house. It breaks his heart for her that her mother has turned her back on her, but it also makes him feel so grateful for the family he has.

After the group leaves, Katniss and Haymitch go to bed. Right after they drift off the phone rings. Haymitch darts up at the sounds and is confused by it, but after the tenth ring he figures it out and grabs the nuisance making the noise on the nightstand.

"What?" he growls.

"Do you always answer the phone that way or am I just special?" Finnick teases.

"Fish Boy why the hell are you calling so late?" Haymitch grumps. He is irritated that Finnick has interrupted his sleep, the rare bit he gets. Katniss is just now stirring from the noise. She looks up at Haymitch and scowls. He doesn't look happy and they have been woken up.

"I just wanted to make sure everything…everyone is alright?" Finnick says. He can't tell Haymitch he wants Katniss to sing him to sleep, to hear her voice, to comfort him, because really and truly she needs the comfort more. He is at home with his loving and understanding family and she has to rely on Haymitch and Cinna.

"She's fine." Haymitch snaps. He is too tired to care what Finnick really wants. He shoves the phone towards Katniss. She grabs it. She doesn't need to ask who it is because she could tell it was Finnick just by the way Haymitch was acting. His normal mean tones are always a little more sincerely mean with Finnick. She knows Haymitch loves Finnick like family, but he also doesn't like the fact that she and Finnick are so close. He is jealous. She thinks it's kind of cute.

"Hey Finny!" She says excitedly.

"Katniss! How are you?" He asks trying so hard to hold back the pounding joy in his heart from oozing out into the phone.

"I'm okay…Cinna and Peeta told Gale about our life. He apologized." She says sadly. "Maybe we will be friends again one day. Hay has been taking really good care of me." She continues a little contently. "The best though is Peeta's mom is banned from all public places…even her own bakery…until I leave. Oh and if I leave Hay's property I have a detail of five peacekeepers on me at all times." The last part she says sarcastically. She feels trapped. "How are you? And Annie and your family and Mags? I wish I could go to District Four again." She shoots out quickly. Finnick laughs at her always sudden and sporadic mood changes.

"Well it sounds like you have had a lot of excitement! I'm fine…my family keeps me busy a lot during the days. They send their love to you. They want to see you again…Annie especially. Oh and she has a crush on Peeta!" Finnick exclaims.

They all know how Finnick feels toward Katniss. When he came back home after helping train Katniss before her victory, his mother had tried to discourage his growing feelings. She felt that Katniss was too young for it to be right, but once she met her on the victory tour. She fell in love with her too.

"So did you need something Finnick?" She asks hesitantly.

"Yea….kinda….could you sing me the song about the valley?" Finnick asks sheepishly.

"Only if you'll sing me the song about the old man and the sea." She responds eagerly. She loves his nautical songs. And she has to admit she misses their nightly ritual.

Haymitch rolls his eyes at this, but lies back down and wraps his arms around Katniss. Finnick and she sing each other to sleep. When they both finally fall asleep Haymitch picks up the phone and returns it to the stand by the bed. He loves her melodic voice and even though she was singing to Finnick, he felt like she was singing to him too.

The next morning Gale gets up early, far earlier than the sun. He makes his way to the woods and retrieves her bow and arrow. _If she can't go to the woods, I'll bring the woods to her,_ he thinks to himself. He knows that Haymitch's back yard is like a small forest and that he and Katniss would be able to go out and at least shoot arrows. He takes them back to his house and cleans them up.

The mines are closed during the time Katniss is going to be there. It has to do with all of the mandatory victory celebrations that are held. But he thinks that President Snow doesn't want people outside of District Twelve to really see the mines, as there is so much press around.

After he eats a quick breakfast her wraps the bow and arrows in a long box and heads to Haymitch's house. He is stopped at the gate to the victor's village by Darius.

"What do you have in the box Hawthorne?" Darius asks teasingly, he knows just by the shapes that it's Katniss's bow.

"Just a gift for Katniss." Gale says quickly. Darius nods and tilts his head in the direction of the house. "Thanks." Gales says as he walks past. Gale still has the necklace he made her. He hadn't given it to her yesterday.

When he got to the house he remembered what Cinna had said yesterday and instead of knocking he walks in and heads strait up stairs. He looks in a couple of open door rooms, but they look like no one has ever been in them. He finally gets to the last door and it is shut. He takes a deep breath and remembers the second thing Cinna told him as he opens the door. Cinna was right he didn't like what he saw.

Katniss and Haymitch in barely anything sleeping wrapped in each others arms. He takes in another deep slow breath, his jealousy and anger starting to tip over. He forces them back down. He walks over to Katniss and gently places his hand on her shoulder. "Catnip" he whispers, "Catnip, wake up. I have a surprise for you." She shoots up alarmed, knife in hand and pointed at him. He backs up slowly with his hands in the air.

Once she realizes it is just Gale, she calms, forcing her breathing to slow. Haymitch grumbles something and pulls her closer. She gives him a quick kiss on the forehead before acknowledging Gale.

"What are you doing here so early? The sun is just barely rising?" She hisses.

"I told you I have a surprise. Now get up and get on your hunting clothes." He says back a little impatiently. She never used to have a problem with waking up early, but she also never used to drink or sleep with the town drunk, he thinks.

"I told you I can't leave the property without five peacekeepers on me." She says tiredly.

"I know. I thought of a solution. Come on already. I'll be down stairs." He says as he turns to leave the room. He can't stand there and have a conversation with her in almost nothing in the arms of Haymitch. But he also knows he can't do anything, because anything that helps her feel better he will do for her.

She comes down stairs in her old hunting clothes. She hadn't worn them since well before her victory tour; they almost feel foreign to her. She is so used to being dressed up like a doll she forgot what comfortable clothes feel like. When she gets down stairs Gale is waiting for her on the couch. When he sees her his face lights up. She at least looks like the girl he knew.

She gives him a slight smile and shrugs her shoulders. He grabs the box with her bow and takes her hand and leads her out the backdoor. She doesn't ask where they are going because she realizes it once they walk outside.

"You are a genius." She whispers, a true smile starting to creep up on her lips. He smiles back.

Once they are in a little ways, he stops and hands her the box. She lifts her brow at him, but takes it and opens it. Her face lights up, she looks like a beacon in the night. "I can't believe you got these for me. I thought they were lost to me for good." She is almost crying. The bow being one of her last true connections to her father.

"Of course I got them for you Catnip. I know how much they mean to you. So you wanna use them or cry over them?" He gently jokes. She lets out a snort of a laugh and nods her head vigorously.

They hunt in the small forest that is Haymitch's backyard and don't do too bad. She takes down four rabbits and three squirrels with ease, still hitting only the eye. Gale gets a turkey and a couple of squirrels as well. Once they feel like they have enough, they sit together under a tree in comfortable silence. Gale breaks the silence first. "I am really sorry. I wish I could take it all back." he is looking at his hands as he says this, but when he finishes he looks at Katniss.

"I know. This is a good start though." She says quietly, giving him a reassuring smile.

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out the necklace, "I made this for you…after we…"He trails off handing her the necklace. She looks at it. It is made of the same twine he uses in his traps. He has braided it and knotted it into a lovely design. She smiles at him and real smile, the kind she used to only save for him.

"It's lovely…but why give it to me now?" She asks.

"I made it for you, so you would always have me with you." He says sadly, "But I let my stupid pride get in the way." He shakes his head before he continues. "Will you please let me in? Tell me about your life? I really want to know from…you." He finishes.

She thinks for a moment. She isn't sure she wants him to be close again, what if he gets mad at her again for something she really can't control. She decides though that today was a true peace offering and that she would give her own and be honest with him. He had been honest yesterday when he had told her about the other women and the drinking and the fighting.

She tells him everything she can remember, from the last nine months. She talks about Finnick and her most and Cinna and her dates. He shows his emotions as she talks and she does so without regret, because truthfully she doesn't regret saving Prim and his life. He holds her and apologizes constantly. She just smiles at him, because she is happy he is at least alive. She regales him with her tales of Finnick and their "down" time. Gale looks hurt that she feels so deeply for Finnick, but he is happy she has someone with her that makes her happy. He wishes it were himself.

"So you are in love with _him_ then?" Gale asks with only a little bitterness.

"I don't know. I don't know what it feels like to be _in_ love. I love a lot of people, but he somehow feels different. I love how cunning and protective Haymitch is, how calm and kind Cinna is and how brave and fierce you are….but I don't know…Finnick makes me feel." She admits. She knows he won't be happy to hear it. He nods his head as he thinks.

"Well… I'm still here and I still love you…you will always be my Catnip and I will take whatever you give me." He finally says. There is no anger in his voice, only a defeated love.

She hugs him and gives him and kiss which he happily returns. She pulls away first and looks into his smoky gray eyes, "I will always love you too. And I will always do what I have to to protect you and Prim. I want you to find yourself a nice girl who will be _in_ love with you and can give you what I can't."

"Don't you understand I have tried….really…tried to find someone else, but I can't forget you." He tells her.

"Maybe in time then." She says wistfully.

They decide to go back inside and Haymitch is sitting at the kitchen table when they come in. "Have a good day Sweetheart?" He smiles warmly at her as he sees her caring her bow and fresh game. He loves seeing this Katniss the huntress, not the doll.

"Yeah Hay," She smiles then looks over at Gale, "We did."

"Hay, can you take these squirrels to Peeta, for him to bring to his dad?" She asks. They know she can't go to Peeta's or to the bakery as that would require the troops. He nods his head and takes the meat.

"I better go too." Gale says after Haymitch heads out.

"Will you and your family come to dinner again tonight?" She asks hopefully.

"Yeah definitely. Except can you and Haymitch include me in your conversations sometime?" He jokes.

"Maybe. Can you read us too?" she asks a little shocked.

"Well you and I have always been able to communicate like in the woods. It's not too much different with you and Haymitch." He explains. She laughs out loud. If Gale, Haymitch and her had all been the same age they would have definitely been best friends.

"We'll see." She says still laughing. He gives her a funny look then leaves to go home.

After the Hawthornes and Prim leave after dinner, Peeta came over with lots of goodies from the bakery. He hands them to Katniss who gives him a curious look. "My dad was so happy to see your squirrels that he went a little overboard with the treats." Peeta says with a smile and shrugs.

"Tell him thanks." Katniss says sincerely.

They play cards like they have done every night they have been back. Cinna and Effie have grown closer over the past few days. They share little sideways glances and this fills Katniss's heart with joy. She wants Cinna to find someone to make him happy and who can truly be his. She holds no jealousy over him. Cinna notices her smile and gives her a quizzical look.

"Cinna will you join me for a walk around the house….since I am not allowed to go any further." Katniss asks. Cinna gets up to agree.

Once they are outside Cinna asks, "So what was that smile in there all about?"

Katniss gives a sly smile and glances at him, "You…and Effie." She says holding in her giggles. The more she thinks about it, she thinks they look cute together, both of them Capitol, but also completely opposite. He gives her a shocked look. He can't figure out how she had caught on to whatever it is he had with Effie. It had started a little on the train here, but it is becoming more than extinguishing a physical need.

"Are you mad?" he asks, a little hopefully. He still wants Katniss more and has a little hope that she will be jealous.

She looks at him happily. "Nope." She states merrily. She can see he is a little disappointed so she gives him more, "I want you to find someone who will love you and only you back. You know I can't…it wouldn't be fair for me to expect you to just wait in the shower for me for all of eternity. I am here by letting you go of shower duty." She says with a grin. He gives her a soft chuckle.

"You know…I do not know if I am quite ready to be let go of my shower duty, but when I am ready I will let you know." She nods her head that whatever he wants is fine. She gives him a quick kiss and they go back inside where Effie is being tormented by Haymitch.

"Oh Katniss thank heavens you are back! He always behaves so much better when you are around!" Effie squeals. Katniss laughs as does Cinna. It is true Haymitch does behave slightly better when Katniss is around, but he really just likes getting Effie all riled up.

"Oh Effie. You know he just likes to watch people squirm." Katniss replies.

In bed that night, Katniss rolls over so she is looking in Haymitch's eyes. He has his arms wrapped around her tightly. "Hay, if I didn't have to live in the Capitol would you and I be together…you know just us?" she asks. He chuckles at her question. It is one he has thought about.

"I would love to say yes Sweetheart, but I don't know. I would always feel like I was robbing you of a life with someone more… appropriate." He says. She gives him a puzzled look so he elaborates. "Well if you lived here and not in the Capitol, then you would be able to be with Gale or whoever else you may have chosen. Believe me I want you to be mine, but I know that you aren't _in_ love with me. I am no fool. I love you too, but the only person I have ever been _in_ love with was my girl before my games." Katniss silently listens, taking in every word as if it were gospel, as he continues. "In a way I love you more, partly because I have grown from losing her and my family, partly because I won't imagine a life without you. No matter who you ever end up choosing…you will forever be stuck with me. We may not have as much fun in the sheets as we do now." He gives her a wink, "But we will always be together. We are like one." She smiles adoringly at him and kisses him. She knows he is right and she loves him all the more for it.

The next day Katniss is required to appear for the food drop off. The trains will be coming to drop off extra food rations that the district gets when there is a victor. Haymitch, Peeta and her will be helping to hand it out. The press will eat it up and will no doubt be airing it on every TV channel that night. She silently hopes Finnick will get to see her.

Katniss is once again surrounded by peacekeepers. Darius and Haymitch are on each side of her. Peeta walks in front of them with Effie. The press get some shots of Peeta, but are obsessive over Katniss. At the train station they hand out food. Peeta does very well, he is personable and friendly, everyone in the district loves him. Katniss plays her part. She is once again dressed up, more conservatively than her normal outing clothes but still sexy, and has on her mask. She smiles and waves. Little children come up to her with flowers, because to them she is like Finnick Odair, a national treasure. Men and boys all line up at Katniss's post. They have pictures of her and ask her for autographs which she always signs her name and kisses the picture. Cinna has to reapply her lipstick several times.

A couple of days pass as they had before the food drop. They keep up their routine. Gale comes over for a little bit in the morning and they hunt in Haymitch's backyard. The Hawthornes and Prim join them for dinner and then once they leave Peeta comes over for cards. Haymitch and Katniss always sleep together and Finnick calls some nights to be sung to sleep.

The night before her, Cinna and Effie have to go back to the Capitol there is the banquet at the Mayor's House. It is a lovely affair and Katniss is happy to spend some time with Madge. Madge was her only friend outside of Gale before her games. She was even the one who gave Katniss the mockingjay pin as her souvenir from home. Madge treats her like before, never showing any judgment. Katniss is always grateful for it. Katniss dances some, but never with anyone her own age. That would lead to rumors of love. She is the Capitol's Katniss whenever she is in public. Mainly though she stays with Haymitch and Darius. They laugh and drink…well what she can sneak anyway. She still laughs at the fact that it is frowned down upon for her to drink, but she can be sold and go on dates with men old enough to be her grandfather and that is okay.

Peeta has a good time at his party. He laughs and jokes with his friends and brothers. He dances with some girls and makes the rounds talking to all the other guests. He wants to ask Katniss to dance and to spend time with her but he knows he can't in public. He has to force his eyes not to wander towards her direction. He is sad because she will leave again tomorrow morning and he won't see her for six months when it is his victory tour. It will just be him and Haymitch.

Katniss and Haymitch and her convoy of peacekeepers head home a little early since she has to wake up early. Once they are home they are alarmed by who they see waiting for them. Katniss's mother is sitting at the kitchen table in Haymitch's house. She looks up when she sees them come in. "So you really choose this life?" she asks bitterly. Katniss sighs and rolls her eyes. She does not want to have this conversation.

"Mother I didn't choose anything." She says tiredly.

"You chose him and all those other men I see you on TV and in pictures with." Her mother snaps. Haymitch who has had enough of this, steps in before Katniss can say anything.

"Look your daughter is doing what she has to to make sure Prim and Gale and YOU are safe. I have sat by for far too long looking after her while you just judge her. You need to look at the situation really hard. Did Katniss ever act like this before she left? Who did she volunteer for? Who kept YOU alive after your husband died? When you think about how much time Katniss has spent saving people you will realize that is all she is doing now." He seethes. Mrs. Everdeen looks at him shocked. She doesn't say anything else, but a single tear falls down her cheek as she walks out the door.

"Thanks Hay." Katniss says as she throws herself into his arms. They spend their last night in who really knows for how long together. They love each other and give each other everything they will need to continue on for at least six more months. Haymitch hopes his plan will work when it is time for them to meet again.

The next morning they groggily wake up. She showers and gets dressed. Downstairs Gale, Prim and Peeta wait to eat breakfast with her before she goes. Gale and Peeta are friendly but slightly competitive.

She will miss this feeling. Although coming home is hard, she is happy to have these few people care for her. She squeezes and inhales every ounce of Prim. She kisses Gale before he leaves and he smiles lovingly at her. His gray Seam eyes sparkle. "Bye Catnip, I love you." He whispers in her ear before he walks out the door.

It is just her, Peeta and Haymitch left. They know Effie will come marching in in her ridiculous heals to usher Katniss back to the train. "So it's really just going to be me and Haymitch?" Peeta asks teasingly.

"Yeah. It should be entertaining…you will have to fill me in on his antics during your victory tour." She says with a light laugh. She can only imagine Peeta having to deal with a drunken Haymitch. "Maybe you could teach Prim to decorate the cakes sometime….if you wanted more pleasurable company." She suggests. She knows it would make Prim's day, because she loves the cakes so much.

"Definitely!" Peeta says happily.

"Well take care of him will you?" She says quietly, her head nodding towards Haymitch. Peeta nods.

"I'll try, but I don't think I can do as good of a job as you." He replies. She leans in and kisses his cheek and he leaves, blush lingering on his face.

Haymitch, Darius, the peacekeeper, Effie and Cinna all escort Katniss to the train. Effie and Cinna say their goodbyes to Haymitch and board. Katniss hugs him tightly, "I will miss you so much. Please watch over them for me….I love you Hay." She has a tear in her eye and looks at him as if he were her own personal savior.

"Anything for you Sweetheart." He chokes out giving her the same adoring look.

She then looks over at Darius with a playful expression, "We will see about that kiss the next time I come back." She pats his shoulder with a laugh as his mouth hangs open. She pushes it back up and gives him a wink. "Bye boys" She calls over her shoulder and she boards the train.

She watches them standing there as the train pulls away. When they are finally out of sight she goes to her room and cries. She will miss Haymitch so much it hurts. She will miss Prim and Gale and even Peeta some, but she is sick over Haymitch.

Cinna comes to her room and sees her curled up in a small ball shaking with tears. He picks her up and puts her in his lap. He whispers words of comfort to her in hopes that maybe they will help. Effie comes to tell them dinner will be in five minutes, but when she sees the broken young girl in Cinna's arms she stays quiet. She watches as Cinna comforts her. She knows his heart belongs to Katniss, but she also knows that even though Katniss loves Cinna it isn't the same way entirely. Effie likes Cinna, but isn't near love yet. It's more of a silly crush. She knows he enjoys her company, but his heart only sees Katniss.

Cinna looks up and notices Effie staring tears brimming and motions her to come in. Effie strokes Katniss's hair and the two try their best to comfort the girl until she wears herself out from the tears. Katniss sleeps exhausted from the emotions. Cinna stays by her side in the bed. Effie goes back to her own room and cries for Katniss. She has grown fond of the girl and hates what is being done to her.

Later that night the train slows. Katniss wakes from her sleep and sees Cinna by her side. He smiles down at her. "How long have you been up?" She asks.

"Not too long darling. I just wanted to make sure you were alright." He says softly. She smiles at him.

"Any idea why the train is stopping? It's still too early to be at the Capitol. We still have another fourteen hours." She questions.

"No clue. If I had to guess it would be for refueling." He shrugs.

The train has stopped now and they get up to look out the window. She breathes in deeply and knows exactly where they are. She can smell the thick sea air and her face gets a goofy smile. Cinna looks at her inquiringly.

"We're in Four." She hums happily. He chuckles at her giddiness and gives her a small smile.

"It's only nine here." He says knowingly. She smiles at him and takes off.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews and follows and alerts! Sorry for the errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 8

She is out of the train and on her way to the victor's village before anyone can say anything. She gets to his door and knocks. She feels like maybe this is just another vivid dream, she hopes it isn't. From behind the door she can hear movement. "Who's there?" his smooth voice calls.

"Just a little flower." She sings backs. The door flies open and she is in his arms before she can even get a good look at him. His strong tan arms are wrapped so tightly around her small frame she is having a hard time catching her breath. Her face in his neck, she inhales him deeply. She starts to kiss his neck slowly and then makes her way to his face. His warm lips smiling inviting hers. She crushes her lips on his. She feels at home in his embrace. They finally pull away and look at each other. Both of their hearts are beating to the same rhythm.

"What? Couldn't stand to be away from me so you hi-jacked the train so you could come see me?" He jokes with his velvet voice.

She looks at him with a superior eye, "Of course not. I figured you had flirted your way onto my train and we were stopping to pick your pretty ass up." She gives him a flirty smile. He laughs out loud.

"God I missed you so much." He confesses as he pulls her into him again, backing her into the wall, lips joining in a magical symphony. Their hands searching every inch of each other, just making sure the other is real. He throws her over his shoulder; she lets out a squeak and laugh as he takes her inside his house. He runs with her into his large beach front room and places her on the bed. They are soon finding their rhythm and get lost in each other. Both are highly trained in this area, but when they are together they let the emotions take them over instead of going through the motions like a job. Until her, he never imagined sex was about pleasure.

As they lay in each others arms, completely worn out from their activities, Katniss gives him a small smile. She melts in his sea green eyes. Soon though the sun will rise and she will have to be gone. She sighs.

"What is it my lovely little flower?" Finnick asks.

"I have to go. I'm sure Effie is freaking out…I doubt we are on schedule." She says forlornly. "I wish this was our life. You know…you and me here away from the Capitol…away from district Twelve." She adds holding back the tears that are forming from wishful thinking.

"Me too…me too." He agrees sadly as he kisses her lips softly. "Good news is I am ready to go so if you would like me to accompany you back now I will." He adds excitedly, as if it was the best idea he had ever had.

"But then you won't get to say goodbye to your family." She tells him. She wants him to go with her, but she would feel guilty if he left them without a word. He nods his head. "Why don't you just walk me back…I'm sure your train will come later in the day."

"Okay." He gives into her. He really just wants to go with her, but she is right his train is scheduled to arrive for him at ten in the morning.

They walk hand in hand in the dark of night back to the train. When they get there Cinna is waiting on the platform. He has a mischievous grin when he says, "So it seems like we are stuck here until ten tomorrow as we have some very important cargo to pick up. Effie forgot to tell us."

He looks back at Effie who has her arms crossed over her chest.

"Well it's not like I had the opportunity." Effie defends herself. She really didn't, Katniss was inconsolable and Cinna was the fool trying to console her. "But Katniss, you need to stay on the train. We don't want the press to know you are here." Effie warns. She had been told to keep Katniss away from the press until she reaches the Capitol. Katniss nods that she understands and turns to Finnick. She smiles at him and he grabs her face and kisses her with as much passion as he can.

When he lets go he grins at her, "until tomorrow then my lady." He bows to her in great theatrics.

She giggles a little and returns the gesture. "Until tomorrow good sir."

When she gets back on the train she goes to the lounge area and pours herself a drink. She sits starring out the window dreamily thinking of the night's events. She loves the way he tastes, the way he smells, the way his eyes light up for her, the way his hands feel against her skin and the smile he only gives her. Her heart flutters with joy as she remembers each heartbeat, each breath, every kiss and every touch of the night.

When Finnick gets back to his house he receives a call. "Hello?" Finnick answers.

"Hello Mr. Odair." He would know that sick voice anywhere. "I hope you were careful with my prized possession." President Snow says. Finnick feels sick with anger. His body shakes as he keeps his voice normal.

"Mr. President what do I owe the pleasure of this call? You have stumped me with your opening riddle."

"Have I now? I thought it was very clear that was talking about Ms. Everdeen. Did you not just spend the past five hours with her?" President Snow says knowingly.

"Well yes I did, but I was baffled by the careful part." Finnick says trying to get more information.

"I supposed I should give you fair warning Mr. Odair, Katniss will have a new regular appointment when she returns. And from what I am told he is a sick man…at least that is what the word is in the districts."

"May I inquire as to who would be able to afford such a privilege?"

"Why there is only one man in all of Panem who has that much power….would you care to take a guess?"

"Are you telling me it is you?" Finnick has almost lost his composure. He feels the bile rising up in his throat.

"Well pretty and perceptive."

"Why? I mean you have never shown an interest that way in the victors before?"

"Because I see her as an asset on my arm as well as in my pockets. I do not mind if you insist on continuing your own obsession for her, just know that if you step out of bounds it won't just be Katniss's family, the crazy girl and your family's lives at risk…it will be Katniss's dear life. I won't physically harm her, but I will keep her as mine until we part ways in death." Snow finishes his venomous threats looming. "See you soon Mr. Odair." Snow hangs up.

Finnick can't believe the conversation. He needs to tell Katniss, but he will wait until tomorrow when they can be alone. Finnick uses the only phone in the house he knows is safe, as in not bugged. He calls the only other person who loves Katniss as much as him. The phone rings the usual ten times before the drunk picks up with his familiar grunt.

"Haymitch I need you to listen to everything I say." Finnick says forcefully. Haymitch groans in response.

"I received a call from our dear President. He is going to be a standing appointment for Katniss. If I don't do exactly as he requests of me then he will marry her. I mean I am already doing everything he asks, how much more worse can it get that he has to threaten to take away my flower?" Finnick bursts. There are a string of curses then there isn't a sound on the other end of the line. "Haymitch?" Finnick shouts.

"I'm here fish boy. Did he say why?" Haymitch responds. He is breaking from the thought of Katniss being touched by such evil.

"He said she is an asset on his arm as much as she is one in his pockets." Finnick answers.

"He knows she is somewhat of a sign for the rebels. It has to do with her selflessly volunteering for her little sister, giving the girl from Eleven a funeral in the middle of the games and her strong will and determination…her spirit. Her ability to hunt which in and of it's self is showing she was going against Snow even before the arena." Haymitch always speaks eloquently about Katniss. She had brought him to life.

"I hadn't thought of that." Finnick says, "He did say I could keep my….how did he put it…oh yes…my obsession with her." Finnick finishes.

"Thanks for warning me." Haymitch says and he hangs up. For the rest of that night Haymitch drank and cried for Katniss. Finnick tossed and turned, but eventually just stayed up making knots, something that helped him keep calm.

The next morning Finnick is up, showered and more than ready to get on the train. He needs to see Katniss. He says goodbye to his family, Annie and Mags. He does not mention that Katniss is on the train, but they all knew as he is eager to say his goodbyes and get on the train early. He stays at the door looking at them, slightly hesitant, when his mother says, "Go to her Finnick. We know its killing you." She smiles at her son and laughs as she says this. He relaxes with her approval and leaves.

When he gets inside the train he notices a very large display of roses in the center of a table with a note and Katniss staring at them with a horrified sick look on her face. He rushes over to her and wraps her in his arms as he picks up the note to read.

_My Dearest Ms. Everdeen,_

_ I hope you have a relaxing trip back to your new home. The people of the Capitol miss you so much. I will be anxiously awaiting your company tonight. I have sent Cinna instructions on you attire. I assure you that our visit tonight will be a regular occurrence as I find you to be very useful for me. Please enjoy the roses. I had them picked from my personal garden just for you._

_ Until tonight,_

_ Coriolanus Snow_

Katniss is petrified. She does not know what to think of his note. She is sickened to know that he will touch her, that his blue snake eyes will look at her body, and that the smell of blood and roses will be on her. She shudders at the thought. Before she knows what is happening she is running out of Finnick's arms and into the bathroom where everything she has eaten or drank in the past day leave her stomach. Finnick follows her and pulls back her hair for her. He pats her back. "I know this is horrible Katniss, but it gets worse. I am now responsible for you too…he called me when I got home after I left you. He told me that if I screw up…he will make you his until death." Finnick tells her and she is sick all over again.

When she can't possibly have anything more to come out of her she shakily stands, Finnick holds onto her to keep her steady. She has tears of anger falling down her cheeks and her eyes are on fire. Finnick is scared by the look in her eyes. He can see the thought, the only thought running throw her mind. _Beat Snow…kill myself. _He understands the thought. He wouldn't even blame her. But he hopes she decides against it. He would hate to lose his family and Annie and little Prim, but it would actually rip his heart out and kill him to lose her.

He grabs her and puts her in the shower. He cleans her. She is frozen in her maddened state. He kisses her and touches her wanting to bring her back to the here and now. She slowly responds until all of her anger is being focused into her desire for him. He remembers the feisty comment he had made to Haymitch back before all of this. More importantly he remembers Haymitch's response telling him he had no idea. With the lust and anger mixing together she has become a wildfire. He knows he will get burned, but he jumps in with her, letting his own anger and lust take over. They are rough; there is no love and compassion in this meeting, just a mutual hate and anger fueled fire.

Cinna and Effie are almost frightened by the sounds coming from Katniss's room. Effie asks, "Should we make sure they aren't killing each other?" Cinna just hands her the note from the flowers. Tears fall from Effie's eyes as she looks back at Cinna who has crumpled to the ground. She gently helps him back up and to his room. She shuts the door behind them and he turns to her holding out a dress. The dress it's self is sexy, yet modest compared to some of the other outfits that have been ordered. It is long and silk. The champagne color shimmers. There is a long slit and it hangs on one shoulder. She will look stunning in it.

"We'll be arriving soon Cinna." Effie states as they both head back towards Katniss's room, the sounds still loud.

"I know, a few more minutes. Let her work out her anger." Cinna replies wearily.

"Ten and that's it. We have a schedule to keep." Effie walks away from him. She can no longer sit with him while he listens to the two people on the other side of the door make the most frightening noises she has ever heard. They send a chill down her spine and she can only hope that they really aren't killing each other.

Katniss and Finnick work out everything they have built up in them. All of the love for each other, the responsibility for their loved ones, the hate and anger for Snow is being released. They finally finish after three hours of being possessed. They dress and both are sore. Cinna knocks on the door, Katniss opens it. "We are here." Cinna says not looking at anyone in particular. They both nod their responses and carefully put on their masks. They become the people the Capitol wants, the people they hate. Cinna goes with the two stars back to the home. Effie is not permitted to follow and goes back to her own house.

When Katniss goes to her room she knows he has been there. There is another large spray of roses but instead of a note there is a blue velvet jewelry box. Cinna watches her open the box. She is uneasy as she slowly opens it. There is a necklace of golden roses. It makes her stomach churn. To anyone else it would be considered an honor to receive such a gift, but for Katniss it is like a leash, a leash that is meant to strangle you to death. She puts the box back down next to the flowers. Cinna leads her to the shower and cleans her only. He dresses her and does her hair and make-up just like he was instructed. Lastly he places the necklace around her neck. She stands looking herself in the mirror, unable to see the real Katniss Everdeen. She had hoped she would catch the elusive glimpse of her, but there is no one there but her shell. She quickly writes a note and asks Cinna to deliver it after she leaves.

Katniss is taken from the tower that cages her to the mansion of the devil. Snow is waiting for her on the front steps with a disgusting smile on his cosmetically plump lips. Katniss has to control her urge to be sick again and regain her mask. She steps out of the car, slowly and seductively. She makes her way to Snow with her arms opening towards him and a pleasant smile on her face.

"Mr. President what an honor to be your guest this lovely evening." She coos.

"No Ms. Everdeen the honor is all mine. You look absolutely stunning." He flatters. She blushes and gives a small giggle. She kisses his cheek as they greet their hands holding onto each other in a friendly embrace. Some press is there and they take a few pictures. He places his hand on the small of her back and leads her into his mansion. She restrains herself from shuddering at his touch. She becomes calm and detached just like always.

Inside he leads her to an extravagant sitting area. He pours them a drink and sits across from her. He takes a slow sip from his drink as he watches her. "Ms. Everdeen," He starts, "I think we should take care of our business before we can really have any pleasure." He looks over her body; he is calculating and has desire in his eye. She nods at him, a polite smile on her lips. "You will still have private appointments, but anytime you are to be in public I will be accompanying you. We will have a very long courtship as I do not want to marry you anytime soon and hand over all I have worked for. If Mr. Odair or you do anything that would displease any clients or do anything that the public may see as rebellious, then you will marry me and be completely cut off from him and the others." He is watching her reactions, but is getting none. She looks at him as she would any other date, with a fake smile like everything that is about to happen will be the best thing in the world. "Do you agree to these conditions?" He finally asks.

"Yes." She says stoically. Then her tone changed into her seductive purr, "Mr. President, I just love your house. Will you please give me a tour sometime seeing as how I am going to be spending more time with you?" She bats her lashes.

President Snow gives a sickening laugh, "Of course my dear, but you will need to call me Coriolanus as that is my name. I have heard wonderful things from associates about you and so far you are doing very well." He stands and holds his arm out for her as she stands and walks next to him. She gently places her hand around his arm as he leads her. "We will be having your favorite for dinner tonight. It is still lamb stew correct?"

"Oh, yes I just adore it. Thank you for your consideration of my tastes." She gushes. Anyone watching would think she really did care for him, just like all of the others.

Cinna hands Finnick the note. He has a sad look on his face as he sees Finnick is also dressed and ready to leave. "She wanted me to give this to you…I think you will win her." Cinna says sadly.

He turns to leave when Finnick speaks, "Who would have thought a little girl would be all of our undoing?" he has a sweetly sad smile on his face.

Cinna gives a light chuckle and shakes his head, "Yes who would have thought. Watch over her Finn." Cinna leaves.

Finnick opens the letter and sees her careful penmanship.

_My Dear Finn,_

_ Even though I am owned, they can't own my heart. _

_ Love your little flower._

He smiles at the thought of her, a real smile. He is on cloud nine thinking of how he will hold her tonight as he makes his way down to meet his date. He has had many dates with this woman. She was demanding, but craved love and attention. Finnick decides he will treat her to what she craves; he will let his love for Katniss ooze out so he can keep this woman happy.

Katniss and Snow enjoy a pleasant dinner. They drink and talk of politics and society. Snow is intrigued by the way Katniss's mind works. She does not show her hate for him, but is honest in her thoughts of life for the citizens of Panem. He admires her truthfulness. Despite her age, she is an equal in their conversations. He is riveted by her. He cannot remember the last time someone has caught his interest.

Katniss turns on her charms, but remains truthful with Snow. She figures he knows everything about her already why hide her views on their world. She does it in a way that would not suggest she is trying to overthrow him or contradict him, but just offer a differing view. She sees in his eyes that he is pleased. She sees he is looking at her with attraction and as the conversation dies she turns on her charms.

"Coriolanus I have truly enjoyed our discussion." She says as she lays her hand on his arm tenderly.

"You have surprised me too Ms. Everdeen." He says with a twinkle in his eye.

"Katniss, please call me Katniss." She interjects.

"Yes Katniss. Like the flower. Would you like that tour now?"

"Oh yes! I am most excited to see more of your lovely home."

They walk arm in arm through the house. They only go to some areas and when they finally reach Snow's intended destination he opens the door and says, "After you my dear." She gives him a slight smile and walks into the room.

As she enters she sees it is a bedroom. Her heart stops for a split second as she feels sick at the thought of having to touch him more. He comes up behind her and runs his hands down her arms, "This is a room that few people have ever seen. This is my room, a room we will share as time goes on." She wills herself to stay calm. She turns to him and runs her hand to his cheek. This close up, she can smell more blood than roses. He takes her hand and brings the palm to his mouth and kisses it. She turns into a robot whose only ability is to seduce and have sex. She pleases him and he is excited by her. She is a rare creature to him. He thinks of how deadly she actually could be. In some sick way that knowledge turns him on more. She anticipates his every need in the room and satisfies him.

When they finish, he looks at her, she stays put together and strong. He realizes he would not be against the idea marrying her; she is almost worth all he has worked for. "There is a car waiting for you outside to take you home. I am pleasantly surprised by our night. I am looking forward to our next shared encounter." He kisses her hand and she smiles at him.

"Thank you for a lovely evening, Coriolanus. I am very happy to have pleased you so." She bows her head and looks up at him.

When she gets back to her home with Finnick she goes to shower. Finnick is just finishing with his date as she steps into the shower. She knows he will soon be showering and they will meet in the shared living space. She scrubs his smell off her. She throws up. She is so sick that he was touching her and will continue to. The others she could handle to some degree, but it is _him_ who disgusts her so badly that she is physically ill over it.

They meet in their area. He wraps her in his arms and kisses her fervently. He carries her to the couch and she sits straddling his lap. She only has on her silk teddy and he had his robe on, but it is not really there for cover. She feels him on her and she wants him. They are slow and take their time, like they are experiencing each other for the first time. When they finish they lie together and sing. They have learned each others songs and now sing together. When sleep is creeping up on them, Finnick asks, "If they do not own your heart, who does?" She doesn't answer for a few minutes, she is thinking. Really and truly two men completely own her heart in that way, Finnick and Haymitch. She can't picture life without either one. She can picture life without Cinna and Gale in that way, only as dear friends. She finally sighs and decides to tell him the absolute truth; she knows he will not like it.

"There are two who are in my heart almost equally, but one is more than the other." He looks at her wanting her to continue. "You and Hay. You are more though." Her eyes sparkle as she looks into his eyes. He has a smirk on his face and his eyes glisten.

"What is that smirk about?" She asks sharply.

"Cinna was right. I won." He says grinning.

"So now I am just a game? A stupid prize for you?" She huffed. His joy dropped quickly.

"No lovely, not at all. I am just so happy that you feel the way you do." He kisses her and she relaxes.

"I can still change my mind you know?" She teases.

"Trust me I know." He laughs and rolls his eyes. He knows she is not his yet, but almost.

Haymitch decided that part of taking care of _them_, the people in District Twelve that Katniss loved, meant that he needed to get the boy out of the mines. He offered Gale a job as handyman/ gardener at his house and Katniss's. Gale accepted readily.

Two months after Katniss had gone back to the Capitol, Gale, Peeta and Hazelle are at his house. Haymitch is watching TV when they hear the broadcaster announce that Katniss and President Snow are an item now. The broadcasters speaks in detail about all of the dates and dinners at the mansion. They talk about how she has not been out with any others. They bring on experts and insiders to discuss this at length. The four of them sit on the couch dumbfounded. Haymitch knew of the scheduled appointments, but did not see this one coming.

He is cursing under his breath. In all of the video and pictures, Snow actually looked like he was in love with Katniss. No one had ever seen him look so gentle and caring. He doted over her and she doted over him. The only difference being that her eyes were dead. She was playing the part of the arm candy to the older man. Anyone who would really be looking at the situation would see that Katniss was not in love with him as she acted. In her interviews she fussed over how wonderful he is and what a powerful and strong leader he is for the country. He knows that now Snow won't just see his plan as an act of rebellion, but as a personal attack.

There is only another month until the victory tour; he will hopefully be able to get her out then. He is pacing and the other three are glued to the program. Finally, when it ends Hazelle is the first one to speak; both boys are still sitting there like they have seen a ghost.

"Haymitch? Why is the president in love with Katniss?" she asks fear running through her veins. She knows Katniss is admired by many, but she couldn't see the president falling for her. Haymitch shakes his head.

"I knew he had scheduled appointments with her, Finnick had warned me, but I thought I was just imagining the look in his eyes, but you saw it too." He doesn't know what to think.

"It is very eerie to look into her eyes. Do they know she is dead inside? Can they tell?" Hazelle asks.

"The people in the districts can." Haymitch says. He has already informed all of them on what they need to know for his plan. His rebellion for her. It may have been lying dormant in all of the districts for years, but she sparked it. He was going to make sure she got out.

"He wouldn't force her to marry him would he?" Asks Gale as he finally joins the conversation.

"Yes. He has already threatened that. But if he does it now…it will be because he wants it, not because they screwed up." Haymitch explains. They all sit there burdened by this news. No one knows what to say so they wait.

Katniss was only sold to others her first month back, now she is just saved for President Snow. He has become more demanding in his wants from her and she bends to his will, completely shutting down emotionally. She knows now that this is more than some control tactic for the people. He has made his feelings known that they are in fact real. She is disgusted with herself. She hates herself more now than she ever did before. Snow still lets her keep Finnick as neither one has done one thing wrong. He won't go back on his word. She has learned many things about Snow, he may be a cruel evil man, but he doesn't ever go back on his word.

Katniss knows the victory tour is coming up and she just hopes that she will be allowed to join them on it and that Finnick will be able to go home during the duration of the tour. Later in the night when she is lying in his bed waiting to be dismissed she hesitantly asks, "Coriolanus, will I be permitted to join the victory tour this year?" she bits her lower lip as she waits his response.

He looks at her with a smile, "Of course my dear. Why would you think I wouldn't?"

"I just was thinking that since you are so fond of having me around….that maybe I wouldn't be allowed to leave." Her voice wavers with her uncertainty of being honest. He thinks for a minute as if he is trying to decide if he really will let her go now or not.

"You are Peeta's mentor after all so it would be expected of you to accompany him and the rest of the team. You will have a high security detail with you at all times though." He states matter of factly. She, deciding to be bold and seeing if she could use her womanly charms tries to get a few conditions out of him.

"Coriolanus," she purrs, "Finnick will also be allowed to go home too." She states more than asks as she looks into his eyes and lazily runs her fingers along his chest. He nods in agreement. "And for my detail…could we have Darius from my district be on it. I know he would give his life for me….I would really feel safest knowing he is looking out for me." She kisses his face in small lingering kisses.

He sighs, "Yes dear anything for you."

President Snow is away for a week on some business in districts one and two. He suspends all of Finnick and Katniss's duties, which feels odd, like they are being set up. But they take advantage of their confinement. They pretend that for once they are not being sold to others and that this is really their home and that they are a real couple. Finnick is holding Katniss in his arms. He can feel her heart beat against his chest. It steadies him. He whispers in her ear, "Marry me." She pulls back and looks at him, her heart rate picking up while her heart drops into the pits of her stomach. Her breath catches and she is looking at him wide eyed.

When she sees his eyes are serious she leans back into him and whispers, "You know we can't. I would…" she can't finish her statement it is too difficult, because she knows unless some miracle happens she will be wedded to Snow.

He breathes out deeply, "We could, _he_ would never know. It will be our secret and when one day comes when we are free…we will already be." She doesn't respond just kisses him with every ounce of love in her body. Tears fall freely from her face and she knows she shouldn't even dream of it.

Darius comes to Haymitch's house the day the Victory tour is to begin. He has a wide grin on his face when Haymitch answers the door. Haymitch had given up hope of even seeing Katniss on the tour being she was now the President's pet. In doing so he had given up his will to stay sober or at least partly sober. It just got worse the more the programs on TV talked about their relationship. He wondered why no one even cares to question how wrong their romance is. People questioned his romance with her. Snow is even older than he is by a good twenty five years.

"What?" Haymitch grunts, holding on to the wall to keep from falling over.

"I have a surprise for you on the train!" Darius says mischievously.

"What a couple of cases of Ripper's best?" Haymitch scoffs.

"No…just a young lady who we all know is your reason to drink." Darius winks at him.

"Well why didn't you say so sooner!" Haymitch hollers. He is off quick to shower and ingest as much water and coffee as possible to sober up. Darius gets Peeta and they wait for Haymitch who comes out of his house looking more sober and much cleaner than he has in months. Peeta laughs at the sight.

"She really is the only one who can take care of you?" Darius and Peeta laugh the whole way to the train.

Finally, as they are stepping into the train, Haymitch turns and looks at Darius, "What may I ask are you doing here anyway? Aren't you supposed to just drop us off?"

"Why the President asked me himself to be part of Ms. Everdeen's personal guard." He has a grin on his face that makes Haymitch want to slap it right off of him.

"Well where is she?" Haymitch growls.

Katniss clears her throat and Haymitch turns so quickly he almost loses his balance.

"Nice to see you haven't stopped tormenting people." She says teasingly.

She looks over at Peeta, "Tell me he has been treating you right."

Peeta laughs, "Yeah I guess I prefer the ignoring than the ranting he does to most other people. Then again I learned to leave your name out of conversations."

She gives Haymitch a stern look, but her eyes light up as she looks into his eyes. Haymitch remembers his feet and runs over to her and grabs her and spins her around. "Still as skinny as ever…you would think living in the Capitol you would be able to eat until you got fat." He says sarcastically as he feels her body to make sure she is still there. She laughs.

She feels content sitting on the train with Haymitch. They go back to their comfortable ways, drinking and playing cards. Darius, Peeta, Cinna and Effie join them. Cinna and Effie are now officially dating. Katniss knew, because one day about two months ago he stopped coming in the showers with her. It made her happy that he had found someone who could love him back. He is still one of her best friends in the world and they share everything.

The tour goes as hers did, except without the shooting of any people in the districts. The people all cheer when they see her. Despite what Snow had been trying to accomplish with making her be with him, the people saw through it. They knew she is being forced. Haymitch is nervous. He hopes his plan goes without a hitch. It is going to go down during the banquet in district four. He has two hovercrafts ready to go to district four for them and district twelve. He knows if he lets her get back to the Capitol it won't happen.

On their way to four Katniss is lying in his arms in bed. She looks up at him adoringly, "Hay…Finn asked me to marry him." she whispers. He inhales deeply and as he exhales looks at her with a brow raised, questioning her on her response. "I said I couldn't." she sighed. He looks at her. He sees she is heartbroken. He knows Finnick has more of her heart than he does, not much more, but more. They have been through so much together. He just holds her tightly to him, because he knows if his plan goes through then she will be with Finnick.

When they get to Four she is happy. Finnick, Mags and Annie are waiting for them on the stage. Annie runs and crashes into her. She prattles on and on asking her questions and catching her up on her life as well. Katniss enjoys Annie's company so much and spends much time talking to her. She smiles at the way Annie talks about Finnick and how he talks about Katniss. Katniss introduces Annie to Peeta and she loves the way Annie adores Peeta. She laughs as she sees how Annie tries to be as close to Peeta as humanly possible. She wonders if she will ever be free to openly adore someone like Annie, but she has learned by now not to get her hopes up. In public Katniss is not to show affection to Haymitch or Finnick, but they stay close by, conversing constantly. Katniss is happy she was able to get Darius on her detail for the trip. He seems to lighten the mood.

She spends much of the week on the beach and in the ocean. She loves it there. Finnick and Katniss play in the water like small children, swimming and splashing. His mother and Mags watch wishfully as the two open up and become themselves when they are together, not the Capitol versions. Haymitch and Cinna are off to the side watching; both have a look of happiness mixed with longing on their faces. "She really is choosing Finnick over us," Cinna starts. Haymitch looks at him questioningly. "I decided to start to let her go when I realized it…I found comfort in Effie. My heart is not quite there yet." He looks at Haymitch hoping he understands that he bowed out of the race.

Haymitch nods his head in respect. "I'm not ready to let go... I will, but not yet." Haymitch states wistfully.

On the night of the banquet, Katniss wears a beautiful shimmering golden dress. Nothing in their outfits is too over the top. Other than Finnick's tux has hints of golden shimmer, the rest of the men are in plan black. Effie is made up in some ridiculous Capitol dress that looks more like a weapon than a dress and Annie wears an aqua colored dress. They all make there way to the banquet and despite the fact that Katniss is not the newest victor she still steals most of the spotlight. When she introduces Peeta the crowd cheers. As she steps off the stage, Haymitch grabs her, "Sweetheart, keep on your mask. Something is going to happen in the next ten minutes. You are not going to like it, but you have to trust me. Nod your head once if you understand." He whispers in her ear. She nods her head.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thanks for the reviews, follows and alerts! Sorry for any errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 9

"Thank you so much District Four." Peeta starts. He is nervous. His speech is being aired live for all of Panem. They had decided on District Four for many reasons. One being that his speeches there would be aired live for all the districts to see. Two is for Finnick. He isn't sure why Haymitch would want to save Finnick knowing he is standing in the way of him and Katniss, but he isn't one to argue. "I am very happy to be here with you tonight. I have some news I was recently informed of and I wanted to share it with you all and all of Panem. Apparently, in Panem, if someone has enough money or power they can buy the company of a victor from the President. Two of our favorite victors are held captive for the most part in the Capitol being sold several times a day. And one has been recently forced to entertain our very own President without her true consent. She has been blackmailed into everything she has done since her games to keep the sister she volunteered for safe."

Katniss realizes what Peeta has done she is standing shell shocked when Peeta runs off the stage and Haymitch grabs her and they run outside. They board a hovercraft. She sees Finnick and Annie are already on along with Cinna and Effie. Mags and Darius are ushering Finnick's family on when they are both shot down. They cannot wait to send someone down as the hovercraft is being shot at. They take off.

Katniss is sitting there looking out feeling confused and like she is suffocating. She can't catch her breath and she shakes. Haymitch is barking orders into a microphone. She looks around at all the people in the craft with her. She sees Peeta sitting across from her. Finnick is making sure Annie and his family are all alright. Cinna is reassuring Effie.

Peeta sees the pure fear in Katniss's eyes and cautiously makes his towards her. "What just happened?" She asks her voice shaking with fear.

"That man over there rescued you from your life." Peeta says as he points to Haymitch. Haymitch is still talking to someone on the microphone. Katniss looks even more scared.

"Prim?" she squeaks out as a tear falls down her face. Finnick runs over to her as he has gotten his family settled.

"He thought of everything. They were taken out of District Twelve just before my speech." Peeta says. He looks down sadly before he continues, "They got out as many people as they could without causing suspicion. My dad and one of my brothers came with them. Madge's father wouldn't let her go with them."

"I'm sorry about you mother and other brother." She whispers. He gives her a small smile and walks back to his seat, letting Finnick take over comforting her.

"Mags…and Darius?" Katniss lets out a sob.

"They knew the risk and they were for it as long as it meant getting you out safely." Finnick says he too has a tear in his eye. He has just lost his mentor, his second mother. They hold each other until Haymitch finally dislodges himself from the command post.

"Hey Sweetheart….didn't think I would get you out did you?" He says with a smirk on his face.

"Well it took you long enough…I wasn't sure how much longer poor Finny here was going to last in the Capitol." She says sarcastically, but he can tell she is joking. She hugs him tightly and whispers in his ear, "Thanks Hay…I will always love you." He snorts and kisses her cheek placing her back into Finnick arms.

"Where are we going anyway?" Finnick asks.

"District Thirteen of course." Haymitch says as if it was as clear as day. "We have a rebellion to start and a war to fight. And this little girl," He points to Katniss, "Is the spark that lit the fuel of the nation. Who would have thought she would be the ruination of a whole country." He laughs. "She's are Mockingjay." Finnick laughs at this but Katniss stares at them expectantly.

"Sweetheart, you wore a Mockingjay pin in your games and they stop when you sing. Plus they are a mocking thorn in the Capitol's side. They defied the Capitol just like you did when you brought real human emotions into the games. And when you refused to let Snow break you into what almost every victor becomes. They refuse to die and so do you." Haymitch explains to her. He doesn't see how she is so blind to the effect she has on those who come in contact with her.

Peeta watches the two men fawn and dote over Katniss. Jealousy rolls in his heart, but he pushes it aside to be happy she is at least safe for now. He can see that they know the real Katniss more than he does and are not drawn to her based solely on her looks. He knows Haymitch is lost without her. And he can see Finnick's love shine in his eyes when he looks at her.

After a while Haymitch, Finnick and Katniss have settled in. They are drinking and just sitting up talking. Most of the other passengers have gone to sleep, but they can't, they are still too wired from the adrenalin rush. "So Katniss….now that we are free….will you marry me now?" Finnick asks her. He is slightly inebriated and slurs his words. His eyes show he is only half joking.

"Yes Fish boy. How will she ever be able to turn down a proposal like that?" Haymitch says sarcastically. Katniss rolls her eyes at both of them.

She gets a mischievous grin on her face and simply states, "I already told you I want you both and you two will just have to learn to share." She is enjoying their discomfort, but they know how to play this game with her. Haymitch and Finnick look at each other and wink then they both look at her with a smirk.

"Well if that's what you really want Sweetheart." He looks at her like she is a piece of meat that he wants to devour.

"Yea Kat, like you said I have gotten really good at sharing." He grins wickedly.

"Well you both will have to catch me first." She smirks as she is out of her chair and dashing towards an empty room. They both run after her and when they get to her, she is standing in a door way taunting them. She has shed most of her clothes and is daring them both to take her.

"Ok Fish boy you hold her down and I will get the rest of her clothes off."

"Wait why do you get to take her clothes off? You hold her down and I will take her clothes off." Finnick argues. Katniss laughs at the two men arguing over who is going to hold her down and who was going to finish undressing her.

"Sorry boys I guess you both lose tonight….Maybe I'll just go check on Peeta." She teases as she closes the door in their faces. On the other side she can hear them arguing. She waits for them to calm down before she opens it again and drags them in the room with her.

She lays them both down and crawls in between them falling quickly to sleep. Both men lay there frustrated and content at the same time. Both are smiling at the girl who stole their hearts and made life matter again.

"Hay?" Finnick starts.

"Yea." Haymitch sighs.

"I want to marry her. I don't know what she sees in your drunken self, but she sees something there. I won't ever keep her from you. I know your relationship is more mental than physical. I don't know how, because between the two of you, you drink enough to drown the whole country." Finnick professes.

Haymitch sighs, "I know Fish Boy. Let me have just one more night with her and I swear all of our interaction will be purely mental." He concedes.

"Don't I get a say?" Katniss hums as she is slowly waking from the conversation.

"No." They say in unison.

"Why not?" She demands.

"Because I say so and I am your mentor. Now go to sleep." Haymitch snips.

"Like hell. I will not sleep with either of you again unless you let me choose and I won't choose until I know for one hundred percent we are free." She says exasperatedly.

"Alright Kat we will let you choose please don't with hold though." Finnick purrs. She smiles like she has won.

The three of them sleep well that night and are woken up by Cinna. "What? I wasn't invited?" Cinna says with mock hurt feelings. His arms are crossed over his chest and he has a pout on his lips.

Katniss looks over at him with a sheepish grin, "Well last time I saw you, you were being drug off by Effie so I figured you didn't want to be invited." She says with a smirk, her eyes alive with mirth.

"Well the three of you need to get up and dressed into something a little more appropriate….as we will be landing in about twenty minutes. I don't think the president of thirteen needs to meet the three of you on such a personal level. She may cancel this whole rebellion thing." He teases. He knows not many people understand their relationship and if he hadn't been involved in it he may have differing feeling towards it as well.

Katniss jumps up and kisses both men quickly before running to the bathroom to shower. When she comes out Cinna has left clothes for her. Haymitch and Finnick are already changed and waiting with the others for her.

When they walk out of the hovercraft and look around District Thirteen they don't see much but the ruins. It isn't until they see the soldiers walking towards them do they realize that they are in the right place.

A large, authoritative man walks up to the group. "I am Boggs. I take it this is the Mockingjay's group."

Haymitch walks forward leading Katniss. "Yes. This is Katniss Everdeen."

Boggs looks Katniss up and down then smiles. "You are much smaller than you appear on TV." He says and then he looks at the rest of the group, "Follow me the other hovercrafts have already landed and the people have all been placed and are awaiting your arrival. First you have a meeting with President Coin." They all nod and follow.

They go deep underground. Finnick's family and Cinna and Effie are taken to their rooms while the rest of the group goes to meet President Coin. Katniss hates being underground she feels like she is choking. The constant gray makes her feel like she is going blind. Everyone but them are in gray clothes, all the clothes are the same. She compares this to being in a prison. It is still better than the prison she was locked in but all of the sameness just blends together until you can't find your way out.

President Coin is a tall, medium build woman. She has silver hair that is perfectly styled into a bob. She looks over the group of four victors. She eyes Katniss making Katniss shudder. This woman has the same effect on Katniss that President Snow did. Coin finally speaks, "Welcome to District Thirteen. I assume the small child in front of me is Katniss Everdeen." She laughs oddly. "To think someone so young, so small incited a rebellion." This again makes Katniss shudder. She does not like this woman instinctually.

Haymitch feels her discomfort and places his hand on her shoulder. "Yes. But sometimes all you need is a spark in a dry forest for a wildfire to come to life." Haymitch says. President Coin nods.

She turns to Katniss, looking her in the eyes with a hard stare. Katniss does not look away or flinch. She is resolved to not let someone ever have a say over her again unless she agrees to it without being blackmailed. "We would like you to be our official symbol of the rebellion. You see the people of the districts have become very fond of you and you inspire courage and change in them. Will you agree to be our Mockingjay?" Katniss does not break her stare, but thinks. She would be used just like Snow had used her, but it would be for something she wanted.

"Yes." She finally states, "But only if I get to personally kill Snow." She says this low with so much venom everyone else in the room shrinks at her voice. Coin laughs wickedly as she sees all of the big men in the room cower to Katniss. She is finding herself slightly weary of the girl. This girl could take her down, but she will have to make sure she doesn't.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." Coin finally responds. She knows Katniss will make an impression killing Snow, more than she would. It would be theatrical and poetic.

The group is led to the cafeteria where they meet up with everyone else that had been brought there. Katniss is shocked to see the other victors were there as well. She looks up at Haymitch questioning how they all had managed to get there. "They shipped themselves to district twelve and were brought with them." Haymitch tells her. She smiles as she sees her twisted family. Prim, with Gale close behind, runs up to her. Peeta's father and brother were running to him. Chaff and Johanna were making their way towards the group as well.

Peeta knew he wasn't really part of their group. He hadn't been initiated like the others. He was content with his family and Delly surrounding him. He saw that Katniss had yet to let go of Prim, who is now slightly taller and curvier than Katniss. She looks like every other girl from Towne back in District Twelve. He smiles at how different Katniss and her sister are. Prim is always happy, pleasant and full of life like Delly. Katniss is sarcastic and dark, but has a flaming fire that shines love and devotion.

When Prim finally lets go of Katniss, Gale scoops her up and spins her kissing her face and neck. He is caught up in the moment and Katniss is letting him have this small victory. Jealousy flashes in Finnick's eyes. Johanna and Haymitch notice. "You would think by now Fish brains fascination with brainless would be over…but here he is pouting like a little boy that's precious trident was stolen." Johanna quips.

Haymitch laughs and claps his hand on Finnick's shoulder. "I guess you really haven't gotten any better at sharing." Haymitch cracks.

By now all of the remaining victors, outside of Peeta and Annie, are gathered in a group talking. Katniss has finally finished making sure the Hawthornes and her sister are fine. Her mother only nods and offers a small ashamed smile. She stands with Peeta's father and greets Peeta and Annie.

Katniss walks over to the group and Chaff grabs her and kisses her right on the lips which everyone laughs about. After the last games Katniss has gotten used to how familiar everyone is with each other. "So you all stuffed yourselves in boxes just to watch me kill Snow?" Katniss says jokingly.

"Yeah Brainless. It is about time we all get a little payback…I have to say though, even though you lived this life the shortest time, you definitely lived it the hardest. I would have said to hell with it all when Snow touched me." Johanna responds. Cashmere nods her head in agreement and shudders at the thought of Snow's lips on hers.

"So Finn how was Snow's sloppy seconds?" Brutus laughs.

"You have no idea. You all think you know how feisty she can be…you haven't seen her truly filled with rage. Her games were just a small preview of her intensity." Finnick eludes with a smirk. He looks at her and at this she blushes, but her eyes are fiery.

"Like your one to talk. It's not like I attacked poor helpless Finny." She scoffs.

"Yeah but people expect that from me." He says proudly, but his eyes show he doesn't want it to be true. Brutus and Chaff are sitting there scratching their chins as if really imagining the brutal love making sessions Katniss and Finnick would have.

Chaff looks over at Haymitch and simpers, "No wonder you fell for the little vixen." He winks and bounces his eyebrows.

"I have yet to experience whatever it is they are talking about…but I sure as hell would like to Sweetheart." He says looks at her naughtily.

Cinna has been listening and he is not normally one to join in on such talks of a young lady, but he knows she is not a young lady who would take offense. "Yes…the noises they made on the train almost scarred poor Effie. She begged me to go in there and make sure they weren't killing each other. She then decided to hide in her room and put in ear plugs and crank the music for three hours." He smiles impishly at the two and chuckles at the memory.

Katniss blushes now out of sheer embarrassment. She isn't offended, but she hates to know that Effie was distressed. The rest of the group was looking at the smallest one like they were truly impressed. Johanna is the next closest in size, but they all know she is a ruthless sociopath so this type of behavior wouldn't be something new.

Katniss quickly shakes the embarrassment away returning to a smug smile and knowing eyes, "Don't look so surprised. Next time I won't hold back like I did on the train." She looks over at Finn and winks. He knows she was holding back on the train, because in their home in the Capitol he wouldn't be able to walk for a while.

He grins mischievously, "Yea there were sometime I wouldn't be able to walk for hours and would be hobbling for day. The Avoxes would be shaking in fear."

Their group is loud and they laugh darkly, not like truly happy, self-satisfied people, but like people who hate themselves and are too damaged and broken. The other people gathered in the cafeteria watch the group. Gale looks at them furiously, because he wants to be the one Katniss laughs with. Peeta and Annie look at them as if they don't belong, which they don't neither of them are true survivalist, true killer, true whores. They are still innocent. Peeta only killed in self defense and Annie didn't kill anyone. It is true Katniss didn't kill anyone for the actual sport of killing them, but her kills were revenge and mercy kills which were thought out, not self preservation. Annie and Peeta didn't play the games like the rest of the victor group. Their hearts are still pure.

Prim, Finnick's family, the Hawthornes, Peeta's family and Katniss's mother looked at them as if they are all raving lunatics, which they are. They are all fearful of the group. Even Effie and Cinna keep some distance. Hazelle's and Prim's eyes show happiness for Katniss, that she finally looked alive again. They love the spark of life that has returned.

Johanna grabs Katniss's arm and pulls her along in the hall away. They are followed by Boggs, Haymitch and Finnick. Johanna opens the door to a small, gray room with two beds, a bathroom, and a small table and two chairs. "And this Brainless is…" Johanna says sweeping her arms "Is our room." Katniss looks at her for a moment then back to Haymitch and Finnick.

"What do you mean our room? Why am not staying with Hay and Finn?" Katniss asks confused. She had assumed she would stay with Haymitch and Finnick. Johanna mocks hurt feelings. "Not that I don't love you Jo, but seriously, I would have figured you wouldn't want to share a room with me."

Boggs clears his throat, clearly nervous with the thought of the young girl sharing a room with the two men. "Gentlemen…" he directs his attention to Haymitch and Finnick, "Your room is across the hall." He says opening the door.

Finnick and Haymitch share a look then look inside their new room. Boggs, sensing the victors are less than pleased with the pairings, looks at the group. "President Coin does not want single men and women sharing rooms." He states this flatly and walks away.

"Humph." Johanna says collapsing on one of the beds, "So much for being free. The Capitol made us sleep with people and this place forbids it!" Katniss is cracking up in a loud irony laugh. She is rolling on the other bed holding her sides.

Johanna is up snooping through the dressers looking at the plain gray uniforms they are to wear. "Well the dress code here should leave a little more to the imagination." She says sarcastically. Katniss is still laughing at the irony of leaving one prison and being thrust into another one. Johanna is now joining her and the two men standing in the door watching them are baffled by their reactions.

"It must be a girl thing." Finnick shrugs. He and Haymitch turn and go to their room to clean up and change for dinner. The girls laugh until they cry for a little while longer and then shower and change.

In the cafeteria all of the victors, plus Cinna and Effie, sit together for dinner, just like in the training center. They joke about how they had never seen Katniss and Finnick in so many clothes. Brutus and Chaff kid that they may stop coming to dinner if Katniss didn't start to wear her robe to dinner again. They have their easy comradeship. The families and Peeta and Annie sit comfortably together at the next table, just like the victors they are coming together.

The food in District Thirteen is nothing special. It is bland and nutritional. Everything is portion controlled and there is no getting seconds. Everything about District Thirteen is bland.

As they are finishing their dinners the TVs in the cafeteria come on and it is a mandatory message from President Snow. Although District Thirteen is not under Capitol rule they have feed from them so they are kept up to date on anything that is happening.

"My dear citizens. In an attempt to over throw the government, rebel forces have blown up District Twelve and have taken most of the remaining victors, including my beloved, hostage. Please take up and fight with us and plead for a cease fire and the return of the victors." President Snow laid it on thick. His speech is full of lies. He blew up District Twelve in retaliation.

The room is quiet for a moment. Finally Coin comes over the intercom system and reassures the people that everything is fine and there will be no cease fire. Boggs comes in and calls over Katniss, Johanna, Finnick, Peeta, Haymitch, Gale and Beetee. They all follow him into a large meeting room where President Coin, Plutarch Havensbee, a gamemaker, and a few of her higher up military people are waiting.

"As I am sure you are all aware of the announcement the President Snow made, I will cut to the chase. The younger people who are able to fight, that have just arrived, will start training in the mornings. Our Mockingjay and the other victors will start to shoot propos immediately. Any questions?" Coin says dryly. They all shake their heads no and she dismisses them with a wave of her hand. Before they can all file out Coin calls, "Haymitch and Katniss. You stay."

Katniss gives Haymitch an uneasy glance. "Plutarch has informed me of the special bond and communication you two share. So Haymitch you will be in control of the Mockingjay. You will be in her ear at all times during propos and missions." She stares at the two victors who don't shy away.

"That sounds great President Coin. Just what I need his crotchety ass in my ear bothering me while I try not to get killed. We work better with parachutes you know." Katniss replies sarcastically. She and Haymitch know if they are too excited she will use it against them. They, after all, are experts at playing games.

Haymitch scoffs, "Yeah like I need to baby-sit your reckless ass any more."

Coin looks at them skeptically for a moment before continuing, "Boggs has also brought it to my attention that our Mockingjay does not care for sleeping with Soldier Mason. She would rather share a room with you and Soldier Odair. I had hoped the rumors were not true." She looked at them disappointedly.

"Well you know what they say about victors, if we aren't sharing a bed then we are dead." Katniss quips.

"Soldier Everdeen, you will do as you are told and follow the rules of District Thirteen. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal." Katniss says back eerily calm as she gets up to leave. Haymitch stays with Coin and Havensbee to go over strategy.

As Katniss stalks down the hall she is a smoldering fire of anger. She no longer wants to be controlled. She is tired of the looming ominous threats, the unrealistic rules and expectations. When she finally manages to get back to her room Johanna and Finnick are sitting there talking. Katniss slams the door shut, fury rolling off of her. Johanna sits there wide eyed at the girl on fire. Katniss looks at Johanna with a deadly calm stare, her voice a low growl, "Find alcohol. I don't care what it is or if you come back before I have worked out my demons, but get alcohol now." Johanna gives Finnick a worried glance then edges quickly out of the room.

"Little flower what happened after we left?" Finnick asks carefully.

"We'll never be free." Katniss states coldly. She walks over to Finnick and he can see what she wants and he gives into her. She is once again a raging wildfire and he will do whatever he can to be burned by it. He is drawn to it. It may be his own anger and hate that he has built up for years that finally gets released in her fire, but he needs it as much as she does. They do not hide what they are doing or even try to muffle it. They are so far from caring or even being in the real world at the moment, they are lost in the fire.

Johanna and Chaff are sitting in his room a few doors down and can hear the rabid noises coming from their room. Chaff's lip curls up as he looks at Johanna for an explanation. "Don't look at me. She comes rolling in like a bad electrical storm and told me to get alcohol. Dear lord. Who knew all along that that is hiding in her? No wonder they all fall for her. At this point I am curious enough to try."

Chaff laughs and shakes his head. "She may break even you in half. I think he is the only one with as much pint up rage as her that can handle it."

Haymitch walks past the door to Johanna's and Katniss's room and makes his way to Chaff's room. He needs is drinking buddy and a drink. He walks in head shaking with an amused laugh.

"What are you laughing about?" Johanna sneers. She doesn't understand the dynamic between Haymitch and Katniss very well. It is something deeper than normal.

"She is going to kill poor Fish boy. Dear lord. I knew she was mad when she left the meeting. She is something else." He says still chuckling. The three of them drink together listening to their friends down the hall make disturbing noises even to them.

When the sounds of fury die out, the three of them head back to the room. Johanna makes sure she followed orders and has alcohol for the fiery bird. She opens the door and Katniss is just getting out of the shower, a towel wrapped around her and a satisfied smile on her face. Finnick is still in bed moaning lowly, but with a smirk of enjoyment on his face. Katniss grabs the bottle in Johanna's hand, "Thanks for remembering the booze Jo." She looks over at Haymitch and Chaff and smirks, "Well don't just stand in the door. Come in and have a seat."

"Sweetheart…I think you broke Finn." Haymitch tries to say seriously but there is a playful pride in his voice.

"He will be fine. A little sore for a while but nothing is broken." Katniss states as if this is the most normal thing.

Haymitch snickers and then seductively purrs "Next time give the boy a rest and come see me." He winks at Finnick. Finnick moans as he sits up and Katniss hands him a drink with a loving smile.

"Like hell! I need this is much as she does. Plus a drunk like you wouldn't be able to handle it." Finnick retorts. He pulls Katniss, who was sitting on the bed, close to him. In this motion her towel shifts and they can see bruises on the inside of her thigh.

"How the hell did you get those?" Johanna asks. Katniss giggles and Johanna takes a better look at her body. "Brainless join me in the bathroom won't you?" Katniss kisses Finnick's nose and wrestles free from his grip. He has nail marks and bruises but his are on his back so they wouldn't notice them until he stood up.

Katniss takes off her towel in front of Johanna and turns. She has hand marks from Finnick grabbing at her on her arms, thighs and ass. Johanna just looks at her in shock. "I didn't know you had it in you. I always assumed you were a gentle lover." She chuckles.

"Only sometimes." Katniss smirks and shrugs as she turns to walk out of the bathroom.

"Where do you think you are going? There are people out there?" Johanna shouts.

"Since when has that stopped you?" Katniss mocks. Johanna is flabbergasted. Katniss sighs, "Well how else am I going to get dressed? It's not like I have clothes in here." She holds her arms out and looks around.

Johanna steps out of the bathroom, shaking her head in disbelief of how much Katniss has changed since she first met her. When they first met she couldn't believe how innocent and pure she was, but after a year and a half of constantly being sold, they had warped her. It made even Johanna's stone heart crack.

Finnick is up and getting dressed when Johanna gets out of the bathroom. Haymitch and Chaff are looking at his back, both with their mouths open. "Well it looks like she gives as much damage as she gets." Johanna quips, still shaking her head.

"You mean she is just as beat up?" Haymitch asks in disbelief.

"Yeah. _They_ killed the innocent girl you brought home from the games. Just like _they_ killed the young boy Finnick was." Johanna states harshly.

"It's nothing. Just us letting off a little steam." Finnick shrugs. He knows this only happens when they are both so consumed with the anger and hate that they don't even feel pain, they are just grasping to feel. Johanna rolls her eyes and grabs some clothes for Katniss. Finnick finishes dressing and soon Katniss and Johanna are out of the bathroom.

Finnick is having a hard time walking and Katniss's gait is a little off so they sit in the bed, backs against the wall drinking talking to the other three in the room. Brutus knocks on the door and Johanna opens it. "Wanted to make sure everything in here is okay. Heard some strange noises." His eyes survey the room and land on Finnick and Katniss, who don't even bat a lash, just keep drinking.

"Yeah everyone is fine." Finnick says waving him in. He pulls up a seat. Johanna returns to her spot next to Chaff on her bed and Haymitch is on the edge of Katniss's bed with her and Finnick.

"So Cinna wasn't exaggerating about the train…was he?" Brutus questions.

"Definitely not. It seems our little girl here is quite the wild animal and Finn well he is not just a docile dolphin of the sea." Chaff says.

"Sweetheart…What exactly brought this on? Is there a trigger?" Haymitch asks Katniss hesitantly. He is not sure if she is drunk enough to respond normally.

"I was just transferred from one prison to another. I snapped. I haven't ever left the games. I am just a pawn." She answers flatly. Her eyes focused on the gray wall in front of her. Finnick holds her hand and kisses her cheek.

"I know we have all been through a lot and been used by the Capitol, but none of us have experienced what she has as being an actual pawn to both players of the game. Plus the months of us being locked away in the tower, no one else has had that done to them. Most of the time, in private, she is just normal Katniss we all know and love, but there are those times especially after Snow that she just turns into a smoldering fire. It's terrifying but electric and soothes my own angry soul." Finnick waxes.

The other victors in the room contemplate what has been explained to them. It's true they were used for years, but not to the extent Katniss is. Katniss shakes her head vigorously as to get out the demons and then plasters on a smile. "Anyone want to play cards?" She asks as if they had not been discussing her mental state.

"Sure Sweetheart." Haymitch says. They deal out the cards and drink and play until they decide it better to go to sleep as most of them have training in a few hours.

Haymitch and Finnick kiss her goodnight and the boys leave Johanna and Katniss in their room to drift off into a drunken slumber. Katniss dreams of the cruel things Snow would do to her and have her do. She never mentioned them to anyone. He was not like her other clients. He liked to psychologically damage people. That is what turned him on. His favorite, she learned, was making her listen to her sister's screams and pleas for help while he was on top of her. Katniss knew they weren't real, but they sounded so real that for a split second the doubt would seep in.

Katniss woke up the whole floor screaming that night. Haymitch and Finnick are the first to arrive, followed by Cinna, Gale and Peeta. They all knew her screams. She is thrashing and Finnick has to lay on her to get her to stop. He wraps the shaking and screaming mess and holds her tight to help the anxiety in her subconscious.

"Wake up my little Flower, Wake up." He says forcefully in her ear. She isn't budging from the nightmare. The screams in her own head are far louder than his demands.

Haymitch gets a cup of cold water from the bathroom. "Move Fish boy." He growls. Finnick looks at him madly, but moves. Haymitch splashes the water on her face then turns to the rather large crowd that has gathered, "Go. To. Bed." He bellows glowering at them until they all slink away into the night. She shoots up throwing punches reaching for a knife that isn't there. Haymitch grabs her hands and Finnick sits behind her wrapping his arms around her. She is fighting them tooth and nail; she has yet to fully emerge from her nightmare. Johanna sits there, eyes wide. She has seen and experienced her fair share of nightmares, but nothing to this extreme.

Finally Katniss tires herself out and calms. Her eyes come back to life as she looks around the room trying find her bearings. "Prim." She gasps. Shaking again.

"Lovely, Prim is in her room with your mother sleeping. We are in District Thirteen. She is fine." Finnick sooths. Katniss is gasping for breath. Haymitch is in front of her rubbing circles into her hands and Finnick is holding her from behind. Both men trying to get her back to reality.

She finally completely calms and looks at them. She hasn't had a bad nightmare in a long time. Not really since after her first games. Since, she has always had someone there to comfort her in her sleep or wake her before the screaming started. After a year and a half of living her existence she hadn't realized the nightmares would be so much worse without her protection.

"I can't sleep in a room with her if she does that every night. How do either of you do it?" Johanna states unbelievingly and annoyed.

"She hasn't screamed that much since I brought her home from the games. Of course she really hasn't slept alone since then either." Haymitch says looking at Katniss with compassion.

"Little Flower normally whimpers some, but I quickly wake her up before they get to screams. I have never witnessed this before." Finnick adds.

"I mean I know my nightmares are bad. I find it easier though to work through them. I wake from them before the screams start." Johanna says still with an annoyed tone.

"She's been through a lot…I have had to start waking her more since our return to the Capitol." Finnick informs Haymitch, his eyes looking at Katniss.

"Snow?" Haymitch questions. At his name Katniss's eyes shoot up and there is pure terror in them. She starts shaking again as if reliving something. "Prim. Prim. No. Prim." She says in a whimper, tears falling down her face.

"Johanna, go get Prim from her room. That may be the only way to snap her out." Haymitch says exhaustedly. Johanna rolls her eyes and begrudgingly gets out of bed to go get Prim.

Gale is in the hall waiting to see if Katniss is alright. Johanna sees him and rolls her eyes in disgust. "Shouldn't you be asleep? We have training bright and early. Someone should at least seem prepared since the four of us will be dead." Sarcasm dripping from her words.

"What the hell happened to her?" Gale asks, trying to not let his anger over come him.

"Nightmare." She spits.

"Where are you going?" He asks almost jogging to keep up with her.

"To get the little princess's sister." Johanna says with disdain. She did not sign up to be the Mockingjay's keeper. She loves Katniss as much as she can, but that just means she tolerates her most of the time. It's a mutual understanding. They are as close as either one can get.

"Why? What is getting Prim up going to do? Other than frighten her." Gales retorts.

"Get her to snap out and realize her sister is fine. Any more stupid questions please direct them to the co-presidents of the Katniss care team." She says, her words cutting.

"Go back if you are so annoyed and don't know how to care for others. I'll get Prim and deliver her." Gale snaps. He runs a head and gently knocks on the Everdeens room. Prim answers and he tells her he needs her to go see Katniss. Prim's face is full of worry, but quickly follows Gale. They pass Johanna who falls inline behind them. She is still shocked that he called her out on her bitching and he doesn't even know her.

They get back to the room and Prim runs in. Katniss looks like she has seen a ghost, but when Prim puts her arms around Katniss she relaxes. "Prim is it really you? Are you hurt? Why were you screaming?" Katniss asks. Prim looks at her confused then around the room at the others. They all look as baffled by Katniss's line of questioning.

"Katniss, I wasn't screaming you were. I haven't been hurt ever. Remember you made sure of it?" Prim says sweetly, but firmly. Katniss lets out an exhale.

"It was a dream." She says as she relaxes back into Finnick she drift back to sleep. Prim looks worriedly at them all. Finnick closes his eyes and falls to sleep under Katniss. Johanna flops back on her bed and mutters some obscenities before she is out too. Haymitch sighs and looks at Prim and Gale and motions for them to come into the hall with him.

"Prim you remember when Katniss came home from the games and would wake up screaming?" Haymitch asks gently. Prim nods. "Well that's what that was. This time though she just couldn't find her way out." He smiles at the young blonde girl who could be Peeta's sister.

"Okay. If you need me again…please I will always do anything I can for Katniss…she does so much for me." Prim pleads sorrowfully.

Haymitch nods his head, "Goodnight." He says as he turns back into the girl's room and falls asleep uncomfortably in one of the chairs. Gale walks Prim back to her room. He hugs her and tells her everything will be okay and that Katniss loves her more than anything. Prim smiles at him and thanks him before heading back into her room.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: Thanks for the reviews, follows and alerts! Sorry for any errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter Ten

The next morning the capable victors, Peeta's brother and Gale all meet out on the surface for training. Annie does not join them since she is not mentally cleared. Boggs is their squad leader as he is under strict Mockingjay detail. They all look tired with purple bags under their eyes. Katniss's voice is hoarse from the screaming and even swallowing is a difficult task. Boggs can tell the group is run down, but he doesn't take it easy on them. They need to be ready, in a few weeks they would be leaving for their first mission.

Before he dismisses them, he looks around at the sorry group. "Does anyone want to fill me in on why you all look dead to the world? I thought victors were supposed to be strong and scary you all look pathetic." He barks.

"No one on our floor got much sleep last night…it seems a little bird was up screaming her head off." Cashmere answers shooting malicious stares at Katniss.

"You are dismissed. Katniss stay." He commands but his expression is much gentler. She walks up to him head low. Finnick and Gale stand off to the side and wait. Both keeping their distance from each other as they do not want to interact. Gale hopes that since they are free she will forget pretty boy Odair and finally be his.

"Why were you screaming last night?" Boggs asks Katniss. He is now as gentle as he would be talking to a small child. She looks down, ashamed that she looks weak in his eyes.

"Nightmares." She mumbles.

"Do you have these often?" He asks.

"Every night…I only scream when I sleep alone though. Haymitch and Finnick have gotten good at waking me before the screaming starts." She glances over at Finnick then back at Boggs. She flushes at her own weakness. She hates feeling dependent on them. She hates more that this stranger in front of her will judge her for it. Boggs thinks for a while, like he is wrestling with a moral dilemma.

"What if, since your floor is just victors and refugees from District Twelve and Four, you sleep in the room with Finnick and Haymitch? Just be discrete. We wouldn't want any talk getting back to President Coin." He smiles at Katniss. She looks up at him amazed that he would go against orders and she decides then that this man she can trust.

"Thank you." She says giving Boggs a small smile.

Katniss jogs over to Finnick who is leaning against the wall by the entrance. She smiles at him and he relaxes and returns it. "I get to sleep with you." She whispers when she is standing mere inches away from him. His lips turn up even higher and his eyes twinkle.

"Really? Is there going to be enough room for all three of us?" He playfully asks. She nods and he puts his arm around her as they walk back down into Thirteen.

Gale watches from afar and wishes her eyes would look at him like that. He feels so detached from her and just craves to be near her again. He decides he wants to find away to make her feel happy.

The week flies by. The group all seems to be more rested and there haven't been anymore complaints about Katniss's nightmares. Haymitch isn't around much. He is always in meetings. Katniss and Finnick decide to stay in her room with Johanna. The only time they spend much time at all with Haymitch anymore is for their evening drink. Katniss misses him, but she is happy that Finnick is with her.

Katniss and Finnick spend time at meals with Peeta, Annie and Prim. Gale spends most of his free time with Beetee on weapon design. President Coin finds Gale to be very useful in that department so he is also brought in on a lot of the strategy meetings with Haymitch.

Things are settling and they are all getting their rhythm. Katniss still feels trapped being underground in the caves of gray, but she is not in constant fear for her sister's life. Johanna, Finnick and she have become like the three musketeers. They are always together; in training, at meals and in sleep. Johanna mocks them for signing to each other at night, but she really enjoys it. Despite how hard Johanna presents herself, it's these little real moments of her friends that make her happy. She sees how they care for each other and how they care for her, but she won't give them the satisfaction of seeing her be mushy too.

"Haymitch?" Gale says to get his attention. He looks to be in deep thought as Gale approaches.

"What?" Haymitch grunts.

"Since you seem to be so chummy with President Coin, could you maybe get Katniss and me clearance to go hunting? Beetee and I have made Katniss and me new bows." Gale states.

Haymitch looks at him. He smiles, because he knows this will help Katniss heal.

"Yeah. Sure kid." Haymitch says almost sincerely, he can't help but let a little sarcasm drip from his mouth. Gale nods and leaves.

The next day Gale had gotten clearance for him and Katniss to hunt on Sunday mornings. After training he jogs over to Katniss wearing a sneaky smile. "Hey Catnip. Can I talk to you a minute?" He calls out to her. She turns and smiles at him. Finnick glares and Johanna rolls her eyes.

"Sure Gale." She calls back as she jogs to meet him half way.

"I know something that is going to cheer you up?" He teases.

"You found an everlasting spring of white liquor?" She says sarcastically hopeful, a smirk going across her face.

"You wish…but this is even better." He continues to drag it out knowing that this is now wearing on her patience.

"Well what the hell is it?" She shouts, exasperated. His grin widens as he sees her frustration grow.

"Well what used to be your favorite day of the week?" He asks.

"Sunday." She huffs.

"Why?" His grin is still wide and eyes twinkling.

"We would go hunting." She says annoyed of his questioning, he already knew the answers she doesn't know why he is asking.

"Precisely!" He says widening his eyes hoping she will catch on.

"You mean we can go hunting!" She exclaims. Her face almost looks carefree in her excitement.

"Yes! Every Sunday morning. Beetee and I even designed us knew bows." He tells her, reviling in her excitement. She jumps on him wrapping her arms around his neck. He wraps his arms around her and kisses her cheek.

Finnick, who has been watching, is now getting even more annoyed with the interaction. He knows Gale loves her. He is afraid that since she doesn't have to be constantly confined with him she will leave him. He doesn't realize she wouldn't leave him for anyone at this point. She isn't good at letting her true feeling show when it comes to love of another person, other than Prim.

He walks over, Johanna trailing behind anxious to see a fight. He clears his throat and Katniss turns around with a mile wide smile that goes all the way to her eyes.

"So what has made my pretty little flower so happy?" Finnick smooth voice asks, trying not to sound jealous.

"I, well we get to go hunting!" Katniss exclaims as if she is a kid in a candy shop. She is bouncing up and down as if this is the best thing that has ever happened to her. He knows her love of hunting.

"Is that so? Just you two?" Finnick raises his brow; his arms are crossed over his chest. Katniss stops her jumping and looks at him with a scowl.

"Oh no!" She fake gasps, "Is Finny jealous?" She holds in her giggle. Johanna who is behind him is losing her battle with the laughs as she watches the stare down between Finnick and Gale. Both men have their chests puffed and are standing straighter.

"Should I be?" he asks, not really to her, but to Gale. Johanna and Katniss are now standing together watching, laughing at the ridiculous display.

"Why would she want me when she could have the expert?" Gale spits at him. This one comment makes Katniss and Johanna both stop laughing. They go into defensive mode. Katniss glowers at Gale.

Her voice goes low and gravely, "Is that what you think? Because if it is then you must think that about me as well…is that why you want me, because I'm an expert?"

Gale snaps out of his stare down with Finnick when he hears Katniss. He knows he has crossed a line, but he doesn't care at that moment. Johanna glares at him and steps in front of Katniss. "I will kill you with my own bare hands if you so much as whisper that again." She has a deadly calm voice, but she will not let this kid break her friends.

Gale hangs his head and looks past her at Katniss. "I'm sorry Catnip…I didn't mean to imply anything. I'll see you tomorrow. Meet me at the fence." He walks away, their joyous moment ruined because of Odair.

"Just let me beat him, just once please." Johanna whines to Katniss, who shakes her head.

"If you still feel like fighting, then we can tonight after we drink some, since I promised Boggs I'd be discrete I need a new way to get out my frustration." Katniss grins wickedly at Johanna.

They are the same, they both need to release their frustration physically since neither one can express anything emotionally. They make Finnick and Haymitch look like sissy girls half the time with how little they can convey emotions beyond sarcasm.

The victors shower and change as they are going to be doing propos this afternoon. Cinna dresses them all in stylized victor uniforms. These will be the uniforms they will wear into battle.

It was decided that these propos would be about the victors' lives; before, during and after the games. Katniss is to go last as she is the Mockingjay and according to Coin the last real victor. Peeta will go with Annie as he has become an important part of her recovery. She has changed some, she isn't so broken. Both Katniss and Finnick are happy to see her blossoming with Peeta.

Peeta still gazes sometimes too long at Katniss, but he has come to terms with the fact that she will only see him as a friend. He has also learned she is not the girl she was before the games. He still loves her, but he realized that he had idealized her so much in his head and she is so broken emotionally that she would not be a good match for him. They talk now, which they never did before, but she stays on the surface. Anytime he tries to go deeper she immediately stops the conversation. Prim tells him she has been like that since their father died. He likes Annie; she is like him, open and caring. Plus Annie has almost sold him on Katniss and Finnick. She tells him they are the only two who would fully understand each other.

Each victor goes; describing their lives before the games, some are happy some are sad. They speak of the horrors of being in the games, of the mental damage it does to a person. They tell of the horrors of being sold or not complying and losing their families. The crew cries at every story. Not many people outside of the victors themselves really can comprehend the horrors or even knew of them. Most people believed like Katniss did; you win, you go home and you are happy.

Finnick speaks of all the secrets he had learned during his times in the Capitol. He tells of Snow's preferred choice of murder. He tells of the tortures he would go through. He looked at Katniss the whole time. His eyes filled with rage, anger and hope. Hope for a better tomorrow.

Katniss doesn't want to do this. She doesn't want to tell all of Panem the indignities done to her. She doesn't want to be open with them, let them see the monster she really is. The monster _he_ made her. She feels sick. When it is finally her turn Cinna turns to her and reminds her to be honest and act like she is telling all of these things to him. She knows this will work, but there are some things that she doesn't even want Cinna to know.

Cinna watches the young girl he loves try to be strong and open up. He knows it is hard for her and she hides most of the things that bother her so she isn't a burden on others. He wishes she would understand she isn't a burden on anyone and to let others really help her.

She takes a deep breath in, trying to suck in as much air as she can. She can't seem to breathe right or get enough oxygen to her lungs. She pretends that she is only telling these things to herself, that the camera isn't going to send this out to the world, that there aren't dozens of people standing around watching her. She speaks in a determined, calm voice. Her eyes trained on the camera.

_ My name is Katniss Everdeen. Some of you know me as the Girl on Fire; some know me as the Mockingjay. I am a seventeen year old girl from the Seam in District Twelve. My father was a coal miner and he loved me dearly. He taught me how to hunt and survive. He taught me to sing. I was happy in our woods, with him. I felt free. I long to get that freedom back. My father was killed in a mine explosion. My mother took it hard and mentally disappeared. At eleven I had to assume responsibility for the one person I love above all others, my sister. We were starving and in probably another week we would have all been dead, but a kind boy risked a beating and burnt some bread for me._ She quickly glances at Peeta while she takes another deep breath.

_That bread gave me hope and I started hunting by myself in the woods outside of District Twelve. I soon met another boy who had also lost his father during the mine explosion. He had also assumed responsibility for his family; hunting to feed them. We became partners. We shared everything even the burden of our families. It was a hard life, but I still had small freedoms. _She looks at Gale as she takes another deep breath in.

_When I was sixteen my sister, whose name was only in the reaping once out of thousands, was called. I love her as much as anyone could love another, so I did what I had to do to insure her life. _She glances at Prim.

_And I would do it again if it meant saving her life. The games were hard. I lost my only ally. My district partner died before he even had a chance to fight for his life. I was burned, because the gamemakers were warning me, mocking the Girl on Fire. They really wanted me to be on fire. But I survived. I came out and thought that I would be free; my sister would always be safe. _

_I was wrong. Immediately from waking after the games my first visitor was President Snow who told me I was to be sold starting during my victory tour or else my family would become deathly clumsy. I agreed to protect them; I always will agree to protect them._

She continued to talk about her first extended stay in the Capitol and about Peeta's games. She tells them about her return to District Twelve, about how she was looked down upon by most of the members of the community. It isn't until she talks about her return to the Capitol that she starts to crack, a small jagged line breaking her mentally.

_When I returned to the Capitol President Snow made me his own. At first I still had other clients as well, but soon he kept me all to himself. He would make me listen to hours of my sister screaming for her life, begging me to save her, while he was enjoying himself to me. He would make me watch video of Finnick Odair being tortured while he would have me strapped down, my eyes forced open and him on top of me. He would make me watch and re-watch the mine explosion that killed my father while he made me please him. He told me it was a planned explosion. That there were dangerous free thinking individuals who worked in the mines and he made sure they wouldn't be around to think freely anymore. _

_President Snow thrives on mind games. He gained his power from knowing he could break a person just by messing with their heads. Don't let him break us. Show him he no longer has the control. In all of the tortures he did to me, not once did I show him he could break me down. Don't give him the satisfaction. Fight for our freedom._

When the camera stops rolling Katniss falls to her knees, no tears falling from her face but her eyes are dead again. She left herself. She can not deal with being this open sharing those details. She sits in a crumpled ball on the ground while those around her cry for her. Haymitch who is the only victor let out of having to share his story, picks her up and carries her away. He is mad at the propos team for this suggestion. He had fought against it. Coin put her foot down she wanted it and there was not arguing. He knew this would break Katniss.

He brings her back to her room, refusing to let anyone come to see her. He gives her a drink and holds her in his lap, rocking her back and forth as if she were a small child. They sit like this for hours, neither of them speaking, but still talking. They don't leave to eat and Haymitch made sure no one would come to bother them. He knew that having to say the things that were done to her out loud had humiliated Katniss. She never wanted people to know, especially her family.

Katniss isn't one for showing emotions readily. She isn't one for crying or telling others what really bothers her. No she has learned to release her feelings physically. Before the games it was through hunting. After the games when hunting had become a none option, she would show feelings through more intimate situations, never actually saying what she was feeling.

As the sun is getting ready to rise Katniss remembers she would be able to hunt today. This lone thought moves her to her feet. She looks at Haymitch and gives him a slow nod. She leaves the caves of gray and goes to the surface, to the gate, to her saving grace. She didn't really want to see Gale, but she knew this was her only way to be free.

Gale is already there. He wanted to get there early so Katniss wouldn't think he decided not to show. After her propos yesterday he had wanted to see if she was alright. Haymitch wouldn't let him in to see her. At dinner that night he didn't see her either, but saw Odair and Johanna, both in a deep conversation. He listened intently as the two talked about what Katniss had said during her time. Finnick had no idea she had been put through that, but it did explain her actions after. Johanna knew that if anyone could make sure Katniss was alright it was Haymitch. He wouldn't press her to talk, they didn't need to. Gale can't help but wonder if he would ever be able to understand her again, he wants to help her feel normal, but he doubts she ever will.

Gale sees Katniss and he smiles at her. She is making her way towards the gate fast. She doesn't smile, but sees the bows in his hand and holds out her hand expectantly. He knows he won't be getting greeting from her today. He sees her eyes are soulless, she is a walking corpse. He hands her her bow and she grabs it and is moving so fast and so quiet he can barely keep up. He can still sense her though. That is something that he has never given up, being able to feel her presence.

She is up a tree fast and taking down every animal that crosses her path. Despite not being able to really hunt for the past year and a half she still has incredible aim. Her first few shots were messy, but soon they were as flawless as they ever were. Gale admires her as she hunts. He hunts along side of her. They silently move, directing each other. It is a comfortable flow. It's almost normal. As they hunt she becomes more alive. With each release of her bow new life is shot back into her.

Finally, when she feels satisfied with her overflowing bag, she sits under a tree. Her head leaning back facing up toward the morning sun, eyes closed. Her hair is in a wild braid. She is dirty from the hunting, blood on her clothes and hands. But to Gale, he has never seen her more beautiful. Her face is finally relaxed, a small ghost of a smile present. She breathes deeply trying to inhale as much fresh air as she can before she is ordered inside again.

He sits next to her slowly, not wanting to disturb her. She finally looks at him. "Thanks for this….I needed it." She says slowly.

"Every Sunday?" He asks, hoping they can return to their old routine. She nods yes. A strand of her dark hair falls in front of her face as she nods. Gale reaches his hand and tucks in behind her ear. She tenses at the contact at first but quickly relaxes at the familiar touch. Looking at him she thinks about what they could have been without the games. She doesn't know if they would have been married or had kids, she certainly didn't really want either of those things before the games. But she can't help but imagine that life while they sit silently. Little does she realize Gale is imagining the same things.

They drop the bags of meat off in the kitchen. Gale leaves quickly to get cleaned up, he has to meet Beetee. Greasy Sae is working in there now; she is excited to see all the meat. They really don't have much meat in District Thirteen. These two would be feeding a whole new district now and she would be serving it in her mystery stew. Peeta bakes bread in the kitchens and smiles when he sees the full bags. Katniss looks at him with a faint smile. "Your dad will be happy…lots of squirrel." Her voice is calm and light.

"I think everyone will be…we will actually get some meat tonight." He says with a light chuckle. He is happy to see her hunting again. Her eyes have life in them; it's a dim life, but life.

She sniffs the air and looks at Peeta, a smile playing across her lips, "Cheese buns?" she asks.

He laughs; his clear blue eyes are bright, "Yup, they will be served with dinner tonight."

She pouts a little jokingly, "I think I should try one, as part of my Mockingjay duties are to be the official taste-tester, incase anything is wrong we wouldn't want to lose someone important to accomplishing our goals." She is sarcastic and airy. She really wants a cheese bun. She hasn't eaten since lunch yesterday and her stomach is in tight hunger knots.

Peeta grins his eyes twinkling as he holds a bun out to her, "Well since it is part of your duties, I think I can sneak you this one. Just this once though." He voices in a mock seriousness.

She grabs the bun quickly, her smile growing wider and hungrily bites into it. "Thanks" she says with her mouth full. He laughs at her childishness as she turns to leave, chomping on the bun.

When she gets back to her room she finds Johanna, Haymitch and Finnick. Once the door is closed behind her she starts stripping out of her dirt and blood stained clothes and heads to the shower with out saying a word to the other three. They glance at her but continue their conversation. While she showers Haymitch tells the other two they need to keep her occupied so she doesn't see the airing of the propos. He doesn't think it will help her feel any better about having shared the horrible indignities she has suffered. Haymitch also thinks it will be good for Johanna and Finnick to miss seeing them as well. There's something about having to watch yourself explain how shitty your life is that doesn't boost your own morale.

Katniss, cleaned and clothed, sits next to Finnick. She takes his hand in hers and he knows this small act is more meaningful than any other public display of affection. This act says that he is on her mind. In this small seemingly insignificant act she is letting him know she loves him. He smiles at Katniss. She returns it with a slight upturn of her lips.

The propos air after dinner, but the victors are all so drunk they don't know it. The whole lot of them are in and out of each others rooms talking, playing cards or just being a nuisance. Annie and Peeta join them. They don't drink; they just watch the other victors and truly believe they are all crazier than Annie was ever. Annie insists on watching Katniss and Finnick. She loves watching Finnick's eyes light up when he looks at Katniss.

After the propos air, Katniss's mother and Prim come to visit her. She is in her room with Finnick. Johanna, deciding they were no longer being fun, decided to head down to Chaff's room. Really, she just wanted to give them privacy. The two blonde Everdeens look in the room shyly.

"Hey Katniss. How are you?" Prim asks sweetly. Katniss smiles at her younger sister with her whole heart, life coming through her eyes. Prim smiles back coming in the room and takes a seat. She notices her mother's hesitancy and motions her for to come in a well.

"I'm good little duck." Katniss replies. She doesn't acknowledge her mother, only looks at Prim.

"We wanted to see you. You have been so busy…we miss you." Prim says, her blue eyes glancing at their mother.

"I've missed you too little duck. How have you been?" Katniss speaks lovingly to her little sister. She doesn't speak to her as if she is her sister, more like if she was her own child. Finnick stands to leave as he is feeling like they may want some privacy, but Katniss grasps his hand and smiles at him and he sits back down next to her.

"They have us working in the hospital. I am learning a lot." Prim says excitedly, her eyes beaming with joy.

"You remember Finnick don't you?" Katniss asks motioning to Finnick. Katniss doesn't know why her mother is here and it makes her nervous. She doesn't think she can let her guard down.

"Of course! I mean who doesn't know Finnick. How have you been?" Prim answers quickly as if she had lost her manners and didn't greet everyone in the room.

"I've been well. Training is draining. The hospital?" Finnick starts. He looks at Prim the same way he looks at Annie. They are both so innocent and open. He feels like he knows Prim and he loves her just from what Katniss has told him. "Katniss always told me what wonderful healers you both are….I am so happy they are letting you continue doing your work here." He smiles warmly at them.

Prim can see Finnick and Katniss are comfortable with each other. She knows they have spent a lot of time together, but she has never seen Katniss hold someone's hand other than hers. She sees the life that fills Katniss's eyes when she is near Finnick and Prim knows Katniss with out a doubt loves Finnick.

Mrs. Everdeen clears her throat before she begins to speak, as if she is announcing her ignored presence. "Thank you." She says looking at both Katniss and Finnick. "Thank you both for everything….I am so ashamed of my own thoughts and so sorry for my actions. I hope you both find the happiness you deserve for giving happiness so selflessly to those you love." When she finishes she has tears brimming in her eyes and gets up carefully, smoothing her dress she leaves. Prim gives her mother a small smile and looks at Katniss and Finnick before she says her goodbyes and leaves bouncing down the halls.

"Little flower…I know it's been a bad couple of years, but I can't be sad about one thing that has come from it." He looks at Katniss, his sea green eyes staring into her gray ones so intensely she wants to look away, but can't. "I got to meet you and although things have been fucked up for a while…I love you and my proposal is always on the table, until our last days." His lips are so close to hers as he whispers these declarations of love; she can feel his warm breath on her lips, it feels like home to her. She closes the gap and kisses him sweetly.

"I-I love you too and one day… I will say yes." She whispers into his mouth. She isn't ready now, not until the Capitol has fallen and she has killed President Snow. They will fight together to take down the evil that brought them together, that damaged them, that damaged their friends and killed so many innocent children.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Thanks for the reviews of the last chapter and all the support through follows, favorites and alerts! Sorry for any errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter Eleven

A few weeks later Katniss is required to shoot propos and visit those injured in District Eight to help boost morale. The other victors aren't asked to go as the districts don't see them in the same way they see Katniss. A small team is assembled to go with Katniss. Haymitch stays in command and is in her ear the whole time. Finnick was told to stay back, but Boggs talked President Coin into letting him come as he would be a great asset in controlling Katniss.

President Coin doesn't really care how she can control Katniss, but she will do anything to make sure the girl is under control. She hates how much people look up to a pathetic, emotionally scarred little girl as their savior when she herself is the one moving this rebellion along. She is envious. She is power hungry. She can be cruel.

The team includes: Katniss, Boggs, Finnick, Peeta's brother Barley, Gale, a few other District Thirteen soldiers and of course the Propos team, Cressida and Pollux. When they touch down in District Eight it looks worse than the flattened District Twelve. This place wasn't flattened but it is on its way. The people are scarce and there is much damage. People lie under collapsed buildings as rescue teams try to pull them out, they are half dead and will probably die within the next few hours. Katniss shies away from the gore; she has never done well with wounded people. For someone who can kill without a bat of her lashes, she is squeamish when it comes to mangled bodies and blood.

Gale watches Katniss's face turn slightly green and laughs at the memories of all the times Katniss would flee her house when her mother and Prim had patience. Katniss would go out into the woods and hunt and skin the animals, be covered in their blood, but when it came to people's blood she was like a sissy girl.

Katniss knows what Gale is laughing at and glares at him. He looks at her innocently and shrugs. She continues to glare. Haymitch is in her ear and can see across the feed that she is a little under the weather at the sight. "How did you ever win the games and go hunting when the sight of blood makes you sick?" He mocks her sarcastically. She glares at the camera and reaches for her ear set, taunting, daring him to continue making fun of her. "Don't you dare Sweetheart." He warns her. She smirks; she knows she has the upper hand.

They are greeted by the leader in District Eight, Paylor. Paylor is a commanding woman, but her face shows kindness. She speaks directly to Boggs first then looks over at Katniss. Paylor senses Katniss's uneasiness and decides against showing the girl pity, besides it's the last thing she would want after having to share her life with the whole country. Katniss is grateful to Paylor for not looking at her as if she were damaged goods, a weak runt of a puppy who was beaten to a mere millimeter of it's life. She wishes more people would treat her normally. She is tired of the sad, pitiful looks she gets in the cafeteria or hallways in District Thirteen.

"We will be taking you into the make shift hospital Ms. Everdeen." Paylor states authoritatively. Katniss nods that she understands, but her stomach twists in knots. "I am not going to lie. It doesn't look good and we are doing all we can, but the outcome for most is bleak. We are hoping that if they can see the symbol for what they have been fighting for then maybe some of them will make it through on hope alone."

Katniss looks over at Finnick for reassurance and he gives her a small nod. She looks back a Paylor, "Okay lead the way." She tries to sound confident, but her voice wavers slightly. The group follows Paylor into the make-shift hospital. It is an old falling down factory, but it is one of the only standing buildings large enough to house this many people. It is a sea of dying and decaying people. The smell is horrendous, like rotting meat and burning flesh. The smell burns Katniss's nostrils and she feels like she is going to throw up, but when she sees a small boy with blonde hair and big blue eyes she is reminded of Prim. He is missing his ear, but has a large smile across his face when he sees Katniss.

He starts to shout to everyone, "The Mockingjay is here! Katniss Everdeen!" He announces to everyone and even bounces his way up to Katniss in the same way her sister bounces around when she is excited.

"Hello Ms. Everdeen." The boy says excitedly, "Thank you for coming. My sister and I always dreamed of meeting you." The boy looks over to a small cot at the mention of his sister. She is lying with her head in a bloodied bandage.

"Hello. Please call me Katniss. What is your name?" Katniss speaks to him in the same gentle, caring voice she uses for her sister. A loving smile splays across her lips.

"I'm Jovan." The boy says confidently. "And this is my sister Javon." He points to the small girl with the bloodied bandage wrapped around her head. Katniss smiles at the pair and goes closer to Javon. She holds the girl's hand and pats it reassuringly.

Katniss looks back up at Jovan. "Will you show me around?" She asks the young boy who nods his head excitedly. Jovan shows Katniss around the hospital. She feels comfortable with him like she would Prim and her queasiness has died down. She listens to people tell her about their loved ones lost, their life stories and their desire for change. Katniss does all she can to comfort them, forgetting the cameras are following her.

When it is time for the group to leave she thanks Jovan and says goodbye to his sister. They all thank Paylor and start to head back to the field to get back on the hovercraft. Half way there Haymitch starts barking orders for them to find cover as far away from the hospital as possible. Capitol bombers were on there way and would be there in two minutes. Katniss sees the bomber jets and decides she can't sit and watch all those people die.

She breaks away from the group, Haymitch spewing curses and orders at her. She takes the ear piece out and lets it hang from her neck. The camera crew follows her as she climbs up on a building and starts shooting at the jets with her exploding arrows. She takes down two jets that fall in a burning heap a few yards from the hospital. There are several rounds of bombs and once they all have left the hospital is gone. Katniss sees red. Her anger at the Capitol grew more than she thought possible. She starts ranting and showing the damage the Capitol had done. Everything that this fiery girl in front of the camera says and does is caught.

Boggs and Gale are dragging her back to the hovercraft before the next round of bombers come. They are chewing her out for not following orders. She knows when she gets back to District Thirteen Haymitch will be giving her an earful too. Finnick is too shaken up to be mad, he is relieved she is fine and proud she stood up to the Capitol even if they still killed all those people.

In the hovercraft Katniss relaxes against Finnick. He is tying knots in his rope to calm himself from the thought of losing her that had just become so real. He knows why she did what she did, it's the same reason he followed right behind her and started shooting at the bomber jets as well. She leans her head on his shoulder and places her hand on his busy ones. He turns to look into her eyes and he sees that she feels shame in herself that she couldn't save them. How could she expect herself, one person, to save them from all of those bombs? She did make an impression though, showing that no matter how few and how small the victory, a victory is possible.

"Next time you try to save the world give me fair warning at least. Don't just jump into a bomb's direction without giving me some clue little flower." He says in a defeated tone. He knows she will do it again, it's what she does. She jumps in front of figurative and real bombs to save people. It's what he does too, more so now since he met her.

She sighs at his worry. "I'll try to remember to inform you Finn of my last minute failures." She shakes her head. She wishes she could have saved them, she feels responsible for Jovan and Javon being killed. Her heart is heavy with guilt.

Gale comes over to them. He is stiff and still mad at Katniss for trying to take down the bombers, but he knows she wouldn't be his Catnip if she didn't. He is madder that she seeks comfort with pretty boy Odair, but he tries to let it be. He thinks if they can just get back to the way they used to be she will forget _him_, but she won't. She will never be the girl that left District Twelve before the Seventy-fourth Hunger Games. Fundamentally she is still down there, but it is a mangled twisted darker version. Not that she was ever considered to be bright and happy like Delly or Prim. This version has really no self preserving qualities. His Catnip would have thought about Prim and her mother's survival before hastily putting her life in danger, but he guesses now she doesn't have to worry about them surviving. They can do it on their own now in District Thirteen.

"Haymitch is having a conniption fit…you better put in your ear piece." He says dryly. He stares at her intently until she complies. He nods and goes back over to Boggs. Boggs looks at him. He really looks over this young man who is so eager and good at war.

"You love her too don't you?" Boggs asks casually.

"Since I was fourteen." Gale responds. He sees Katniss flinch at something Haymitch is telling her.

"Why?" Boggs asks truly curious as to why he loves her. Boggs can see her traits that make her a fiercely loveable icon for rebellion, but he isn't sure why Gale and Finnick and Haymitch all seem to want to do anything for her.

"We are the same. She is the only one who could…could…I don't know." Gale tries to explain, but like Katniss isn't good with words. "She has a fire in her that gives life to all those who are lucky enough to have her touch them." He finally says. He doesn't expect Boggs to understand, but it's the truest thing he has ever said about who Katniss is fundamentally. She gives life to those she loves. She made sure Prim and her mother didn't die. She helped keep Gale and his family alive. She helped Peeta survive the games. She was born to survive and help others to survive. Boggs nods. He's seen the fire that she displays when she is in protector mode; it was alive and spreading this afternoon.

"What the hell Sweetheart? Do I need to implant this in your head so you will never be able to turn me off again? Or would you rather Coin lock you in a prison for going against orders?" Haymitch berates her. He is proud of her. He knows she wouldn't have been herself if she hadn't at least tried. He also knows Coin doesn't take well to orders not being followed. He doesn't think Coin is too mentally stable. He sees the power hungry person she is. "Are you alright Sweetheart?" He finally asks, his voice losing the hysterics it had moments before, after receiving the silent treatment from her.

"Yeah, Hay, I'm fine." She exhales. She's not fine, but she doesn't want to talk about it.

"See you soon Sweetheart." Haymitch says tiredly.

"What'd Hay want?" Finnick asks concerned by they way she was flinching after each shout of the angry drunk, who was surprisingly sober. Just like in her games he feels the need to stay sober to help her through the war too. That and he can't openly drink in District Thirteen. They do, but only on their floor in their rooms. Most people won't go near there as they say all the victors are a bit bonkers.

"To tell me that he would have a chip implanted in my head so I would hear him all day everyday no matter what." She says with a hint of mockery. "Or else Coin will lock me away in some prison for not following orders." She rolls her eyes.

"How would either of those things be any different for you than they are now?" He scoffs. He knows Haymitch is always in her head as she is always in his, they don't need an earpiece to communicate. As far as prison, well they have a few more luxuries than the District Thirteen prisons, but they are pretty much bound and dictated to what each minute of their day goes to.

She laughs darkly. "It wouldn't be." She finally says after she finishes. Boggs, Gale and the others in the hovercraft all look at her. Finnick smirks at them and then pulls her closer and into a kiss. If they are all going to stare at the crazy, whore victors then he will give them a show worth staring at. She readily complies and when they come up for air she looks around at all the blushing men and says, "Well I think our work here is done Finny. We have made a group of grown men blush like little school girls." She smiles deviously at Finnick as they laugh at their audience.

Boggs shakes his head in disbelief and looks at Gale who has gone back to working on some plans he has for Beetee and weapons. Peeta's brother, Barley, walks over to the two victors and sits in front of them. He has a smirk on his face like he has a secret he is dying to tell. They look at him expectantly since he did come over to them.

"Well. I guess my little bro was right….all victors are crazy." Barley says trying to keep from laughing.

"Says the boy who just walked up to and insulted two such crazy people and is now laughing at them." Katniss says defiantly. "Plus isn't your brother a crazy person then?"

"Yeah but he was that way before the games. Hops and I used to call him the Everdeen stalker. So him being crazy is nothing new." He looks at Katniss. She stares back a little shocked.

"At least he had good taste…just like bow boy over there." Finnick remarks. Peeta and Gale having major crushes, or what they called love, on Katniss is nothing new to Finnick. He admires them for holding out as long as they did.

"Yeah whenever Katniss and Hawthorne would come trade my brother would be in such a bad mood for the rest of the day. He was so jealous." He laughs at the memories.

"Yes so jealous of two Seam kids struggling to survive everyday." Katniss scoffs.

"Not the struggling part, the getting to spend time with you part." Barley explains this to her as if she were a child. Finnick is now laughing at how truly clueless she was before her games. Haymitch was right. She hadn't noticed any of them. Katniss rolls her eyes she is tired of being reminded that men wanted her. She is perfectly content with Finnick and Haymitch wanting her because she wants them too, but everyone else makes her uncomfortable like she is just a piece of meat to buy. Barely shakes his head and leaves them.

Katniss and Finnick sit together holding each other quietly singing songs from their homes to each other. Boggs notices and he is surprised at how open and vulnerable they are with each other.

When they land in District Thirteen Haymitch is waiting for them on the hovercraft landing dock. Katniss lets go of Finnick and runs up and hugs Haymitch. She knows he was worried about her. Haymitch relaxes when he sees she still in one piece. Finnick strolls over to them and clears his throat to make his presence known.

"What no 'Hey Fish Boy. Good to see you're still alive.'?" Finnick smirks.

"Fish Boy the only reason you were let on this mission was to make sure she followed orders." Haymitch starts nodding towards Katniss. "Jo's right you both are brainless. _She_ decides to go off and take down the Capitol by herself and you join in." Haymitch says in a mock scolding tone. He is happy Finnick is okay too.

"So how much trouble am I in?" Katniss asks sarcastically. She knows her actions won't go unnoticed.

"Well that's why I'm here Coin has requested your presence…Now." Haymitch says as he leads her towards Coin's office.

When they get to Coin's office, Coin is finishing up watching the footage from the mission to Eight. She clicks off the screen the moment it's over and turns to look at Haymitch and Katniss. "You better be glad that no one from your team was injured by your little escapade." She glares at Katniss and Katniss stares back, not backing down. "At least we got excellent footage….It is much better than what we had originally hoped for. Just remember a dead Mockingjay is just as powerful as a live one so if you insist on risking your life that's fine….Just know I will give orders to the rest of the team to back down if they are in danger, they are still useful alive."

Katniss smiles slightly, making Coin nervous. Haymitch knows what Katniss is thinking. She has figured out that Coin is not a friend and he sees Katniss putting on the same manipulative mask she used in the Capitol. "Of course President Coin. I wouldn't expect anything less. I am so pleased that the footage made you happy. My goal as I am sure yours is…is to fuel the rebellion. Now if you don't have anything else to discuss with me at this moment…May I please be excused? I need a shower." Katniss says in her perfectly adapted sweetly seductive voice. Haymitch sees Katniss is just leading Coin to believe that she is behind her. Katniss does well at following the old adage, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer."

Katniss waits idly in her chair for Coin to respond. She keeps her eyes locked on the older woman. "Yes…you may go." Coin says as she waves her hand dismissively. Katniss smiles politely and slowly stands and walks back to her room. Haymitch follows closely behind and he knows she is holding it in. She will do whatever it takes to win true freedom.

When she gets back to her room no one is there. Finnick is in his room showering and Haymitch went there to get a few hours of sleep. Johanna is at training still. For the first time in a long time Katniss is actually by herself. She showers and lets the warm water wash off the smell of burning flesh. She sits in the shower letting silent tears fall. When the tears stop she gets out of shower and dresses. She braids her hair and it falls down her back, the feeling is so familiar, but foreign compared to before her games. She lays on her bed with her hands interlaced cradling her head. Taking deep breaths in and out as she calms.

Finnick comes in after a while and lies down on top of her, giving her chaste kisses across her face. She smiles at him and pulls him closer to her, kissing his soft warm lips that make her feel alive. Slowly they make their way out of their cloths, both of their needs and wants growing. She loves Finnick she knows that without a doubt. She doesn't want to do this with any other man again, not even Haymitch. Haymitch is an extension of her, but Finnick makes her alive.

They leave trails of hot wet kisses all over each others bodies. They are gentle and fit together like two puzzle pieces. He looks into her bright gray eyes that are sparkling for him and whispers, "I love you." So softly into her lips it brings a shiver up her spins. Her lips smile into his as she mouths, "I love you." back. They hold each other tightly after, both lying in the rumpled sheets, whisper singing their songs to each other.

It's not often when Katniss lets down her guard, but in these times with Finnick she does. She feels safe in his arms and dare she even think happy.

Johanna burst through the door after training, before she even looks around she starts ranting. "So I heard the girl on fire set ablaze two Capitol bomber jets and all I got to do was stupid train-" Johanna stops and looks at the two lovers in the sheets, smirking, before she continues. "-ing. And I miss out on the show going on in my room!"

"Yes such a pity. If you had been there none of us would have made it back." Finnick jokes.

"Plus we wanted to make sure you wouldn't be giving us any directions during our show." Katniss slaps his arm playfully and rolls her eyes.

"Besides Jo…I don't think poor Finny could handle both of us at the same time." Katniss teases.

"Since I see neither of you are physically damaged I am assuming this was a nice ride…" Johanna mocks while raising her eyebrow nosily.

Finnick smiles his famous sexy smile. He stands up naked and stretches before he reaches for his clothes. Both girls scoff at his arrogant display, but they are used to it. He really is a beautiful specimen of a man. His body looks like that of a Greek god, but for Katniss it is his heart that draws her to him. She loves the person on the inside of Finnick more than everyone else loves the outside of him. His heart is purer than hers even though he is broken. He can still feel and communicate feelings, which is something Katniss has a hard time doing.

Katniss gets up and gets dressed also and after Johanna showers and changes the three make their way to the cafeteria for lunch. At lunch they had yet another nutritionally bland meal and joked some with Prim, Peeta and Annie.

After lunch Johanna goes off to find, "Some more interesting people" as she put it leaving Katniss and Finnick alone. They don't get too much alone time, but they do a good job of making alone time even when they are surrounded by people.

Finnick looks at Katniss with a devilish grin, his eyes glimmer with delight at the thought of them being alone. As soon as their food trays have been deposited Finnick grabs Katniss, in the middle of the cafeteria, and throws her over his shoulder.

"Put me down Finn!" Katniss demands, her limbs flailing about.

"No I don't think so." Finnick says plainly as if this is normal behavior. He is walking them out of the cafeteria and all the people in there are gawking at the display. Everyone always whispers about the Mockingjay's love interests, especially Finnick, but this new salacious tidbit is sending the rumor mills of District Thirteen into over drive. Most people like them together and could see how happy they make each other, but there are those who just don't think it was right for a young girl to be with a man, despite the fact that he is only eight years her senior.

Seeing as Finnick would not be putting her down she stops fighting as fiercely, instead decides spanking him would be a better idea.

"Little flower…be careful you are flirting with some dangerous things here." Finnick says seductively. Whack…her hand smacks his ass again. She is smiling wickedly.

"Oh am I? And what kind of danger could I be getting into?" She purrs back. His large hand lands on her ass and gives her a jolt.

"Two can play this game." He smirks.

Before she can retaliate they are back in her room and he is locking the door. He throws her on the bed and straddles her, holding down her legs and arms. He smiles innocently. "Now the way I see it...you have two options." He pauses for dramatic effect as her brow rises inquisitively. "One, we can have a serious talk and then fun or two, we can have fun then the talk." She looks at him not knowing what he wants to talk about.

Finally she answers, "Fun first since I don't think we will be left alone for too long." He smiles at her seductively before he devours her. She loves the way he feels on her. He loves the way she tastes: salty, sweet and a little bitter, like good tequila. While they lie there in each others sweat and glory Finnick runs his hands through her hair absentmindedly.

He sighs, "Little Flower am I holding you back from being with someone else?" Finnick has been growing increasingly more worried that she only stays with him out of habit and that maybe now that she has other options she may want someone else.

Katniss sits up to look in his eyes; she looks bewildered by his question. She doesn't understand how he could even think that. She sees the doubt in his eyes and leans in closer, her lips almost touching his. "Definitely not." She smiles, "Am I holding you back?" She asks pulling back.

He smiles and pulls her into him. "Impossible. You are the only one I see." He kisses her as if that is the only way to prove that she is all he sees. When they pull away they go back to comfortably holding one another.

"If we get out of this and are free….and there are no more hunger game…could you think about marriage and kids with me?" Finnick asks lazily.

Katniss sighs. She never thought about these things before, there was never a reason. She never really thought about love before, but here she is in love. She shrugs, "We'll see…I don't see why not." She responds nonchalantly.

They drag themselves out of bed and shower and change for dinner. They don't really want to leave the cocoon they made in bed, but know if they miss their meal they will be paying for it the next day at training.

Surprisingly Gale sits with them at dinner that night. Most nights he sits with his family and the other victor's families.

"Hey Catnip, Odair." He tries to sound friendly, but when he says Odair's name it comes out a little bitterly.

"Hey Gale." Katniss greets trying to get back to the friendship they once had.

"Hey Gale." Finnick smiles at him, his hand under the table squeezes Katniss's thigh. She blushes slightly. "How is weapon design going with Beetee?" Finnick asks with sincere interest.

"Good. Actually tomorrow after training we need you two to come down and test some new weapons we have been working on for you." Despite his best effort to hate Odair, Gale is finding it hard. Beetee has been telling him about all of the victors when they work together. And Gale has learned that Finnick isn't the playboy he had grown up seeing, he is actually an amazing person just like his Catnip.

"I heard Coin is pleased with the footage we got yesterday." Gale comments.

"Yeah. So pleased…A dead Mockingjay is just as valuable as a live one." Katniss scoffs. Only Haymitch had heard what Coin had said.

"What?" Both Gale and Finnick said at the same time.

"In my meeting this morning…she said she didn't care what I did on the field to get good footage, but she has ordered that the rest of the team not follow. She won't spare someone who is more useful alive. She really doesn't care if I die out there…I would at least be easier to control dead." Katniss shrugs as if this isn't anything new.

"Well you know we won't follow orders either." Finnick looks up at Gale expecting him to agree.

"Yea Catnip wherever you go you have us two following close behind." Gale smiles reassuringly.

"You two may be as crazy as I am." Katniss says shaking her head.

Suddenly the screens in the cafeteria flash on and President Snows is addressing the country. Images flash behind him of Katniss shooting down a bomber jets.

_People of Panem. It breaks my heart to see our lovely Ms. Everdeen has been brainwashed and trained to kill the same people who have loved her and protected her since her games. The young woman in the clip has been identified as Katniss Everdeen, my love, but she is a far cry from the peaceful woman we have all come to know and love. We need to come together as a country to save her from their evil plot to overthrow our great nation._

When he finishes the seal of Panem comes on the screen then they turn off. President Coin comes on over the speakers. "Attention District Thirteen residents. As we have all know, what President Snow has said is complete lies. He was the one to try and brainwash and break our Mockingjay, but she didn't let him win and neither will we."

Katniss starts to shake as people start to stare at her with pity again. The stares from the confession propos had died down, but now they were brought back and a wave of self hatred and ashamed feelings over come her. She looks down at her hands and retreats within her self. Finnick and Gale noticing she is mentally shutting down again lead her out of the cafeteria and take her back to her room. They wait there trying to reassure her and tell her encouraging sentiments, but they seem to make her worse. Haymitch rushes in a few minutes later.

"She shut down again." Finnick says dejectedly.

"Okay. Boys I think it will be better if you leave." Haymitch says sternly. Gale starts to argue, but Finnick grabs his arm and Haymitch glares at him. Haymitch picks up the small girl and hands her a drink and sits with her in their comfortable silence. This is the only thing that makes her feel better. Haymitch is an extension of her and his presence is always welcome just as your lungs or arms are. They don't have to speak to actually share their emotions, both of them professing their hate towards all the powers that be on both sides of the rebellion and still somehow calming the embarrassment they feel at letting Snow control their every move. No one else quite knows how they feel. Both Katniss and Haymitch feel weak and embarrassed that they let Snow get away with what he did. It might not make sense to anyone else, but it is like they are ashamed they allowed someone to make them this vulnerable.

Finnick and Gale walk around the floor together, in silence at first, but Gale breaks it.

"What do you love about her?" He asks bitterly.

"It's complex. There are so many things. She is as delicate as a flower but as fierce and deadly and strong as a raging wildfire. She protects first then thinks. When she cares for someone she takes responsibility for them, no questions asked and expecting nothing in return. She brought me back to life." Finnick explains, trying to be delicate.

Gale nods in agreement.

"Why do you love her?" Finnick asks.

"The same reason you do…and I am assuming they are the same reason why Haymitch and even Cinna love her. I just wish she never had to go into the hunger games, selfishly. We would have had a shot then." Gale says shaking his head in regret.

"She's beautiful." Cinna says from behind them. He had been listening to their conversation and couldn't help but point out the easiest way to explain her. "Inside and out." He finishes.

Gale and Finnick nod in agreement. The three of them sit in the hall, each one thinking about Katniss.

Prim comes up to them skipping. She sees them all in deep concentration. "Hey Cinna, Gale, Finnick. What are you doing? Where's Katniss?" She chirps.

"She isn't feeling too well. She's with Haymitch now." Finnick answers gently, choosing his words carefully as to not upset the pretty blonde girl in front of him. He thinks how different Katniss and Prim are, in every way possible. Prim is a beautiful young girl and probably will be a heartbreaker when she gets a little older. He knows he has seen Gale's brother sending longing glances her way at dinner.

"Is she sick? Does she need a doctor?" Prim asks worriedly.

"No, no. She will be fine in a little while. Don't worry." Finnick gives a reassuring smile.

"Hey Prim can we have your opinion." Gale starts wanting to get her mind off of Katniss's mental break. "If you could choose a future for your sister what would it look like?" Prim things for a while, but then her eyes light up and a bright smile shines on her face.

"One were she won't have to fight for anyone's life, where she can grow old and happy and maybe even get married and have kids. One where she can hunt daily since I know the woods was one of the only places she ever smiled growing up." Prim says excitedly. They nod at her response. It is the future all of them want for her.

"And what future do you want Prim?" Cinna asks.

"I want to be a doctor so I can heal everyone and everything." She squeals. They chuckle and smile at her excitement.

"Well from what I hear you are on your way." Gale says.

"All thanks to Katniss. She truly is the best person in the whole wide world. I just wish she could see it too." Prim says solemnly. She perks up some and her bright smile returns to her face. "I like this game. What future do you all want?" She asks.

"I want to be free and hunt and marry your sister and take care of her." Gale says wistfully. She nods this isn't news to her. She knew he has wanted that since he was fourteen. She looks at Finnick.

"I want to marry your sister and take care of her, also. But more than anything I want her to be happy. That's my future your sister happy." Finnick says smiling. Prim loves this answer. She looks over at Cinna expectantly.

"I want to design lots of outfits for little baby Mockingjays." Cinna half jokes.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: Thanks for the reviews of the last chapter and all the support through follows, favorites and alerts! Sorry for any errors.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Hunger Games or any of the characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 12

He holds her while she shakes. Her mind has flown the coop and now he holds what is left of the girl on fire, the Mockingjay. He knows Katniss Everdeen hasn't been there for years, but at times there were remnants of her in the other two identities that were forced upon her. They were true to her basic character, but still not Katniss Everdeen. They are not the girl who loved her father and sister above all or the girl who loved to swim and hunt and go to the Hob with her father. No he knew this is not the same girl. This girl warped into something new after her father died. She became something stronger, fiercer and angry. She had become a survivor at only eleven. As far as he was concerned she had already won the Hunger Games before her sister was reaped. Her life was a preparation for the Hunger Games. She was never allowed the proper time to grieve the loss of her father. She had to become the parent to her seven year old sister and mother. She had to become the soul provider. No this shaking, broken girl in his arms was something different completely.

Katniss did not cry when she slipped away. She just shook as if her body could no longer take the mental and physical stress she had endured for the past six years. Her eyes would die out, the flame that shines in them completely blown out. So Haymitch holds her to maybe, just maybe, keep her together. He doesn't speak; he knows the words would be lost on her. That is one thing the others don't get. They are not like he and she. Haymitch and Katniss aren't ones for words.

Johanna comes into the room hours later; they had still not moved or made a sound. She looks at them and breaks the silence. She is annoyed, but more she feels pity for the younger girl. She is annoyed by the pity she feels. She gives Haymitch an irritated look, "So it looks like you are our new roommate tonight? What set her off this time?" she spits.

Haymitch gives her a serious look, one that not many people have seen, but means back off if you don't want to die. "The announcement." He says low in a deadly calm voice.

Johanna roles her eyes, but she gets it. "Whatever I'm turning out the light. Goodnight. Make sure she doesn't start screaming." Johanna knows not to try to talk to Katniss. It is pointless and that is one thing she hates, wasted attention.

Haymitch and Katniss continue to sit in silence neither of them sleeping, but neither one awake. Gale, Finnick and Cinna talk more about their shared interest that night after Prim left them. Finnick is enjoying getting to hear tales of Katniss before the games. He hangs on Gales every word. Gale tells them of their hunting adventures and misadventure. He tells them about Katniss's phobia of blood and wounded people, how she got her nickname and about their time in the District Twelve, mainly the Hob.

"Can I ask why you never crossed the line with her…you know before she was sent to the games?" Finnick asks truly curious. He can tell by the way Gale talks about her, he has been in love with her for a while.

Gale's eyes mist over as if remembering a special dream, a hope. His face hardens then softens then hardens again as the dream comes and goes in his memory. "She wasn't aware of those types of things or feelings. She had one goal, keep Prim safe and happy. I didn't want to put anymore pressure on her, especially if I was reaped. It was my last year…I was waiting till I couldn't leave….her." he looks down at his fist, clenched together tightly trying to release the built up rage he feels that their forever was stolen from him.

"How about you Cinna…when did you fall for the girl on fire?" Finnick asks with a grin. He knows that like all tributes and stylist, Cinna met Katniss while she was nude.

"Well…If you must know…it was her open disdain for the Capitol that did me in." He smiles knowingly before adding, "Of course meeting her while she was in her birthday suit didn't hurt either." He shakes his head as he softly chuckles. She was thin like all District Twelve tributes in the past that he had seen on TV, but she had lean muscle and despite the skeletal frame she had lovely soft curves. Gale looks up appalled that Cinna had seen her naked on their first meeting. Cinna notices. "All tributes are presented to their stylist in the nude. It's the way it has always been." He shrugs as if it wasn't a big deal, which to him it wasn't, but he could see how someone else may beg to differ.

"That just leaves you Mr. Odair?" Cinna asks, with his brow raised.

"When she volunteered, not because of the supposed glory, but to protect the one she loves…and when District Twelve refused to clap…well I knew I had to meet her." He says. His eyes shine when he thinks about Katniss.

"More than any other tribute in District Twelve….Katniss made a difference. Nobody from the Seam or Hob celebrated. Even the peacekeepers were sad." Gale remembers. He shakes his head quickly. "We better get some sleep Odair…another long day of training." Gale gets up and nods at the two men. He really can't sit there any longer and talk about Katniss. He hates himself a little because he can't seem to bring himself to hate Odair or Cinna completely.

"Night." Cinna and Finnick call as they get up and part ways as well.

Finnick walks back down the hall to Katniss and Johanna's room to see if maybe she had come back. When he peaks his head in he sees them still sitting there, her shaking and him holding her, trying to keep her together. Haymitch looks up at him and they lock eyes. He motions with his head gently for Finnick to come in.

"How is she?" Finnick mouths, barely a sound escaping his mouth. Johanna sleeps deeply on the bed across from them, light snores coming from her.

"Been better." Haymitch responds sarcastically. Finnick nods and sits next to them and leans his head back against the wall. He sleeps there with them.

The next morning when they wake to go to training Katniss is still not mentally there, but she mindlessly goes through the motions. She dresses and silently follows Finnick and Johanna to training. Her eyes are still dead and Gale looks at the other two victors questioning if she was better. They both shake their heads no. Gale looks down disappointedly. He had hoped she would be back.

Katniss works herself harder than ever before. Even though her eyes are dead she runs faster and goes harder on all of the drills as if she is trying to find an escape. She doesn't look at anyone, but can feel the stares on her. Boggs is worried and makes a call to Haymitch in command.

"Is Katniss okay?" He asks.

"Why is she not doing anything? I thought she would at least go through the motions." Haymitch responds shortly.

"No, she is doing great in training…but her mind is on autopilot as if she has left the building." Boggs answers back…he hasn't ever seen anything quite like it before in all of years as a soldier and then a commander.

"She isn't there." Is the only response Haymitch gives. Boggs can tell by the way Haymitch answers that he isn't going to get anymore details. He knows Haymitch doesn't trust anyone with Katniss's information.

After everyone is done training for the day, Katniss sits in the training area. She falls to the ground and started shaking again. As if all of the energy she spent trying to escape hadn't helped at all and she is once again defeated. Boggs looks at Finnick then back down to Katniss. He looks at the small girl, not with pity but sympathy. Finnick scoops Katniss in his arms and carries her back to the room. She has stopped all free movements after training and Finnick showers her and dresses her and carries her down to weapons as they are scheduled.

He knows Coin has it out for Katniss and doesn't want Katniss to do anything that would be perceived as blatantly going against orders, like not following their strict time schedules. Plus he thinks maybe the weapon practice will help her come back, like the hunting had.

When they get down to weapons Gale and Beetee are waiting for them. They give Finnick an inquiring look as he carries the shaking girl in his arms. He offers them a polite smile and shrugs. He sits her down in a chair and she stays there, not moving.

"We have added some new features to her bow." Beetee starts, "She will still have the exploding arrows, but now she will have fire ones, regular ones, and poisonous ones that will kill a person upon contact. I want her to practice with the arrows and bow at the range as they all have a slightly different weight and it may affect her aim." Beetee finishes and looks questioningly over at Katniss.

Gale bends down to her eye level. His steely gray eyes become gentle as if he were about to talk to Posy, his sister. "Catnip...Do you want to practice with your bow?" He asks. She looks into his eyes and nods her head slowly. She gets up and takes the bow. Gale leads her to the practice range. The exploding and fire ones have been deadened for practice as well as the poisonous ones, no need to put anyone else in excessive danger.

Beetee looks at Finnick and starts to explain his trident. "It will be able to come back to you once you call for it." Beetee says with pride. "That way you will never have to get too close to any one else who may wish you harm." Then in a slightly quieter voice he asks, "Is she okay?"

Finnick looks at the older man. He is almost the same age as Mags, maybe ten years younger, but by far now the oldest living victor. "I don't know….I don't know if it is the memory of what _he_ did to her or if it is all too much to ask a seventeen year old girl to shoulder."

He looks at her and sees she has started to come alive once more. She is standing in perfect shooting form. Shoulders high and rounded back, legs planted firmly apart. She looks exquisite to him in her natural hunting form. It reminds him of her games. When he had seen what she could accomplish once she had gotten the bow away from the Careers. He admired her during her games. Never once did she kill just to kill or for herself. It was always a selfless kill. She killed the boy who stuck a spear through the little girl form Eleven and she killed the last tribute as a mercy kill even though if the tables were turned and there were no mutts that boy from Two would have been sick and brutal towards her. She killed him so he wouldn't live a second longer in the irreversible pain and damage the mutts had caused. He had pleaded and she gave him his final wish. She was an angel of death, not the grim reaper.

He watched her as she came back with each release of the arrow, each perfect hit. Gale's expressions change as he sees her fire come back into her seemingly dead gray eyes from moments before. She had stopped shaking and is looking like a warrior. She is once again oblivious to the attention she is drawing. She is in rapture. She loves the feeling of the string as she pulls it tight, the feeling of release as the arrow shoots forward and the pure adrenaline she gets from the second the arrow pierces its target. She imagines she is back in her woods, her hunting partner by her side, always having her back. She moves seamlessly as the targets get harder. It is like watching a ballet.

Once she feels settled she stops and looks around, her eyes questioning how she got there. She tilts her head slightly and Gale understands the question. "After dinner…the announcement…you checked out…After training Finnick brought you down here so you would stay on schedule." He says. She nods her head in understanding and offers him a small smile. He returns it, because watching her come to life with her bow and arrow is like being in the woods with her back in District Twelve, it's the only place either of them smiled.

She walks out of the practice range room and with a smirk. She sees Finnick and Beetee have been watching her. "Like the show gentlemen?" She says seductively sarcastic like only she can.

Beetee grins at her. "Does it feel alright…natural?" He asks.

"Yes. I love it…if I had had this during my games they would have ended much sooner." She compliments. "What'd you make Finny?" She asks, glancing at Finnick, her eyes showing she is back, smiling at him.

"A trident." He holds it up proudly, like it is his new toy he got for Christmas.

"You got to see what I can do…let's see what you got?" She purrs, batting her lashes playfully. He chuckles and shakes his head, golden brown and auburn tresses moving freely with each shake.

He makes his way to the practice range and gives it his all. He is excited by the beauty of the instrument he holds in his hand. He loves that it comes to him after each hit. She watches her sea king as he takes down target after target in a perfect symphony. He is beautiful and deadly. His muscles tighten and contract with each movement. His breath is controlled and timed perfectly to each movement his body makes. It excites her all the more. Together they could win this war for their freedom.

He saunters out of the practice range to where she is waiting, watching. He has a satisfied smile on his face and sees her desire for him in that moment. He puts on his best seductive smile and leans into her, "I'll give you lessons, if you give me lessons." He purrs in her ear.

A shiver goes up her spine and she pulls back, returning the same look he taught her, but it is mixed with the sarcasm she and Haymitch share. "Are you talking on the range or in the bed?"

He throws his head back in a fit of laughter. "Little flower you already know all of my skills in the bed…Maybe we can try out our skills on the range like a good foreplay?" He winks at her.

She smiles at him deviously and licks her lips. "Sounds intriguing…when can we start?"

Finnick looks over at Beetee, "Can Katniss and I teach each other the others weapon?"

"Yeah, but not too long…you can come back Saturday when the place is pretty much empty except for Gale and I." Beetee agrees.

Finnick smiles turning to Katniss. He holds out his arm for her and she takes it. They make teaching each other a sensual yet serious act. They show each other how to stand, breathe and which muscles to contract and when, their hands going over and holding onto each other. They teach each other well and decide to call it a day. They will come back Saturday after training to practice some more. They are both in need of each other.

Gale left soon after they started to practice. He became jealous. He couldn't sit there and watch the two of them give each other instructions. He remembered when he and Katniss had first met and she had taught him how to use a bow. Every touch she gave him felt like fire burning his skin even if she was only twelve at the time. Something about her touch felt like fire. He could only imagine what it would feel like now if she were teaching him instead of Odair.

As Gale is storming off down the corridors of District Thirteen he runs into Haymitch. Haymitch grunts a greeting at him before asking, "Have you seen her?" He knows Gale will know which her he is talking about, it's the only her they really have in common.

"Yeah, she and Odair are giving each other private bow and trident lessons." He snaps angrily. He turns quickly facing the older broken down version of himself. "How do you stand watching them together? I saw you whenever she would come on TV with another "date" or Snow. I know you love her!"

Haymitch shakes his head and chuckles darkly at the young Seam boy who has so much to learn about the world. "I was angrier with those, because she did not choose them. She chooses him and if he makes her happy then my job," He holds out his arms and swoops them around, "all of this is worth it and done. She and I will always have something more." His voice is sincere, but dripping with his normal tone of vile sarcasm.

Gale looks at him and sighs heavily. Shaking his head he turns back into the direction he was walking in and goes back to his compartment to think about, for the umpteenth time, what could have been with the girl with the bow.

Finnick and Katniss, consumed in adrenaline and lust, don't make it to their own rooms. They find a supply closet just outside of weapons and quickly go in before anyone notices. Finnick locks the door from the inside and looks at Katniss like he is going to devour her. She returns the hungry look and attacks his lips with hers. They rip each others clothes off as Finnick lifts her by the hips and presses her against the wall. She wraps her legs around him and her arms hold tightly around his neck. Finnick hold onto her hips tightly as they move together. Both of them whispering their desires and moans.

Haymitch catches up with them as they are leaving the supply closet. He has a big cheesy grin on his face as he sees her eyes are lit up again and filled with fire. He knows what they were up to in that supply closet. "Hey Sweetheart, try and be nice to your cousin…he looked pretty red as he was storming down the hall. Well, maybe not as nice as you are to Fish boy…But still try and be nice." He says teasingly.

She looks at him and gives a cocked smile. "Hay, I'm nice to everyone." She whines sweetly. At that both Finnick and Haymitch start howling with laughter. She pretend pouts, but the grin tugging on her lips wins out and she too is laughing. She knows better than anyone she is not a nice person and she doesn't want to be nice to anyone the way she is to Finnick.

"Yea Sweetheart, you're nice to everyone and I'm fucking jolly ol' St. Nick!" Haymitch hoots.

"Finny here is the only nice one. You, me and Jo…hell even Gale are all a bunch of bitchy assholes." She smiles up at Finnick like she is proud of him.

"Good to see you came back. So in the future should I forgo holding you all night and getting a neck cramp and just send you to weapons?" He smirks at her, but his eyes sparkle enough to tell her he is happy to have her back.

"No I like the holding. Send me to weapons only after you have a pretty good pain in your neck." She mocks, but her eyes show thanks and appreciation. "So boys what's next on my schedule?" She asks holding out her arm.

"Dinner." Finnick says happily, licking his lips. "I'm starved."

"Me too." She says as her stomach growls loudly. She blushes in embarrassment, but the feeling of hunger is all too familiar.

The three of them go to dinner and sit with Johanna and the other victors. It is again like they are back in the training center and are once again reunited as a family. They laugh and joke and tell each other all of the mundane things that happened.

That night, Katniss can't sleep as her two roommates are dead to the world. She wiggles out of Finnick's iron grip on her and slips on some shoes. She doesn't bother changing into regular clothes, she stays in her tank top and sleep pants as she walks down the hall absentmindedly. She paces up and down the long gray halls just trying to tire herself out.

Gale is having a similar problem and is unable to sleep. He also decides to roam the halls. He doesn't bother with a shirt, but only puts on some pants, because who else would be up at this hour. At times he is so consumed with rage he can't sleep. The rage had started when his father died in the mines, but built into a full blown wildfire of hate and anger once Katniss was reaped. Watching her games from home was the worst experience he thought he could have at the time. He was wrong. Watching her be sold was the worse thing that had happened to him and knowing he was a small reason why she agreed to it made his guilt and rage grow even greater.

He sees a small figure walking towards him. Her head is down and it looks like she is murmuring something to herself. He smiles at the sight of her. She is alone and has the same scrunched face she makes when she is concentrating on a difficult snare. "Hey Catnip." He whispers into the dark hall.

Her head jerks up, but she relaxes quickly when she realizes it Gale. "Hey Gale. What are you doing up?" She asks shocked that anyone else would still be awake.

"Couldn't sleep." He shrugs, but she sees his eyes are fiery. She knows he is raging behind is fake calm demeanor.

She looks at him skeptically. "Really? When did you start hiding from me?" She asks accusingly.

He looks at her incredulously. "How am I hiding…I am right in front of you. Talking to you." He says hedging the real question.

She rolls her eyes. She knows the game he is playing. "Right. But your not being you anymore…at least not the you who would show me the rage in his eyes." She demands he acknowledges what she is asking.

He huffs out. He is angry that she won't drop it. She can see it, she knows he is going to blow his lid soon. She plans on being the one who opens it. "I don't know what you are talking about." He denies.

"Whatever Gale. I thought we were friends again….I guess not." She shrugs. She knows this will hit his button and he will pop. She can see it in his eyes. His gray eyes turning darker and hard. They twitch ever so slightly when he is about to go on a rant.

He tightens his jaw and clenches his fist. He takes a deep breath in before he speaks, remembering he can't yell. "Friends? Friends? Really? You want to talk about being friends? How many times have you sought me out?" She looks down ashamedly. He smirks in victory. "That's what I thought."

She falls against the wall. Her knees are in her chest and her arms wrapped tightly around them. She knows she isn't the best person in the world, but she hadn't realized she was neglecting anyone. She just isn't sure how everyone fits in her head. She isn't sure where she belongs.

He sighs and sits next to her on the cold hard floor. "I know you have a lot going on, I'm sorry." He says almost sincerely. He has a hard time really apologizing, especially if he doesn't think he is entirely wrong.

She looks over to him, her eyes brimming with tears. She is determined to hold them in. "I –I just…I don't know where I belong." She begins. "Or how my past and present fit into my head. I don't even allow the future into my head." She concedes. "I'm just trying to make it to the next day."

He puts his arm around her and pulls her close. "I guess I am having a hard time excepting the past and present too. It's not exactly how I had pictured it." He gives her a small smile as a peace offering. She returns it. He kisses the top of her head and inhales her hair. She reminds him of the woods, their woods.

"So what are you so upset about that you can't sleep?" She asks quietly.

He looks at her and shakes his head before answering. "I am mad because I hate what has been done to you….I hate that _they_ took you away from me...I hate what has been done to all of us…I hate Snow and the Capitol." He says maliciously.

She looks at him seriously with a resolve he has never seen in her eyes before. "Me too." She states coldly. She has become tense. He fears she may disappear again, but she doesn't she soon relaxes as he holds her tightly against himself. They stare into each others gray eyes that are the same. Both steely and determined. Both raging with a fire to tear down the oppressor.

They fall asleep side by side in the hall way staring into each others eyes. They are awaken by the sound of footsteps. Peeta is awake earlier than most to get the bread for breakfast started before training. He sees the two of them asleep sitting up. His arm draped over her shoulder. Their heads on their knees, faces towards each other. He wishes it were him next to her. Offering a small comfort, but he knows it never will be. The small girl in Kindergarten he fell in love with isn't all there anymore. He doesn't really know this new wondrous creature. He sighs as he looks at them. Nothing about their position would register anything more than deep friendship. They look up at Peeta, both moving a little slow as they are sore from their current position. She offers Peeta a slight smile.

"Morning." He says cheerfully to them and nods his head.

"What time is it?" She groggily asks, trying to remember how they ended up like this.

"Four. Don't worry you still have an hour and a half until training, but I do suggest a bed to sleep on in the future so you won't be so sore the next day." He smiles brightly at them and gives a small laugh. They both glare daggers, but he can see they are not meaning it. He leaves them to go to the kitchen.

"Well I guess we better go back to our rooms to try and sleep a little more before training." She looks at Gale who nods in agreement. They give each other an appreciative smile to show their thanks for allowing some of the bridge to mend. They head back to their rooms silently.

When she enters her room she sees Finnick still sleeping, but looking a little sad. He is frowning ever so slightly and his face is tense. She is at first worried he is having a nightmare, but as she climbs back in bed with him and wiggles her way back in his arms, his face relaxes and a small smile splays across it. He sighs happily as if he has found his favorite teddy bear again. She looks at the gentle features on his face and smiles herself as she drifts back to sleep.

Morning comes too soon and she is dragging her feet to get up. Finnick pulls the covers off of her and drags her out of bed. She stumbles to the floor and changes quickly. "Didn't sleep well little flower?" Finnick asks knowingly. He knows she left the room last night. He just doesn't know why or where she went.

She sighs heavily. "No." But that is all the answer she is willing to give right now. He nods at her but his eyes tell her that they will be discussing it later. She looks at him tiredly but nods back.

At training Boggs tells them they will be leaving for a mission to District Two in two weeks. The victors are all excited to finally get some real action. Victors are funny people. Even though they abhor the Hunger Games and the killing of innocent children, they are all still violent and vindictive in nature. Who knows if it is something that happens after the games or if it is something that was always in them, but they are all eager for a fight.

Peeta walks over the where Katniss, Finnick, Johanna and Gale are chatting anxiously about the upcoming mission. "You two get anymore sleep?" He asks looking at Katniss and Gale.

Finnick's face becomes hard. He knows she left last night, but doesn't understand why or where she went. Katniss tenses as she knows Finnick isn't pleased. "Yeah." She looks up at Finnick. "I fell asleep happy." She says hoping Finnick will understand. She can't really say that she fell asleep in his arms because that is something she isn't supposed to be doing. His face is still hard and won't let up until he hears the full story. His sea green eyes have become murky with jealousy.

"Where were you two?" Johanna asks obnoxiously.

"In the hall….neither one of us could sleep well. I got up and went for a walk around the floor and bumped into Katniss." Gale states a little haughtily. He likes that it is getting under Finnick's skin, a form of payback.

Peeta looks at the group a little nervously, realizing he may have caused a problem in their dynamics. "When I was on my way to the kitchen this morning they were asleep sitting up in the hall." Peeta says, hoping this will restore the order. Finnick raises his brow at Katniss and she looks at him almost pleadingly to drop it. He shakes his head and puts on his fake Capitol smile.

After training, Katniss and Finnick go for a walk. He looks at her expectantly and she sighs before giving into his demand. "I couldn't sleep…I just thought maybe if I walked around a little I would get tired, but I ran into Gale and he was mad and wouldn't tell me." She glances over at him to gage is reactions, he looks at her to continue. "Well I yelled at him for not really being my friend and then he yelled at me for the same thing….then we sat and talked about how we were each having a hard time….I don't know…fitting the past and present together. Then I guess we fell asleep." She shrugs, but looks at him wanting him to say anything.

His face returns to the gentle face he only gives her. "I understand Katniss." He concedes. She smiles up at him and he bends and kisses her nose.

"Finn…When I came back in the room, your face was all worried and sad, but as soon as I wiggled my way back in your arms you were happy again." She looks into his beautiful hypnotic eyes that sparkle for her like the sea on a sunny day. "I fell back asleep in your arms happy too." She admits.

The rest of the week goes by in the same routine; wake, train, shower, lunch, propos and strategy, dinner, drink with Haymitch, sleep. On Saturday they break the routine and after lunch, Katniss and Finnick go to the practice range to work on their weapon skills and to teach each other. Finnick loves watching her body move. He finds himself wondering how Gale was able to restrain himself ever. She looks elegant, like a skilled ballerina when she moves with her bow and arrow. Her body is rigid, but fluid at the same time.

Gale for once did not go to weapons. He would not watch them again. He flushes even thinking about their familiar and seemingly seductive touches and he wishes it were him instead. He feels like he is intruding on some forbidden desire when they move together as one, showing and leading the other to release. He does not need anymore reasons to be angry, so he stays away.

When he instructors her on how to use the trident he always holds a little too tight or a little to long. He love the way her small strong frame feels against his, delicate but deadly. "You are magnificent." He whispers in her ear as she stands poised to launch the trident at the target.

A smile tugs on the side of her mouth. She thrust the trident and it hits its target right on the mark. She decides she enjoys working with the trident almost as much as she does the bow and arrows. It gives her ecstasy. Or maybe it's just her teaching instructor. No, she really does enjoy the moment of puncture too much for it just to be about the instructor.

She is patient with him and the bow. It is a more delicate instrument than the trident and takes a gentle touch, not just a thrust. Soon though he has caught on how to finger and hold it. He too decides he likes this weapon almost as much as his own. It reminds him of the instructor teaching him. She is delicate yet sturdy and strong.

When they are done they once again find the supply closet and as they did earlier in the week, they let their desire and need come to a head. They really don't understand why weapons practice makes them feel this way, but it does. So much so that they can't even wait to find a proper room or bed. Hell, if they were sure there weren't cameras or people in weapons they probably would have gone down right there on the range floor.

They spend the rest of the night with Johanna and Haymitch talking. She loves the way Finnick's mind isn't completely desolate and warped like hers or even Haymitch and Johanna's. He has a hope in his mind that the other three can barely comprehend. He talks of the future where they can only think of the present and relive the nightmares of the past. His mind is damaged, but he never lost his hope.

Haymitch knows they will be going on their mission soon and he knows it will be like a reminder of her games. He will be sitting in command watching and directing her while she fights. He looks at the three warriors and knows that if anyone can bring down the Capitol it will be them. His chest fills with sorrow and pride at the thought, because who should ever be trained to kill or have as much hate for something. But he is far prouder of the fact that they will bring it down, block by block. He knows Cato or Glimmer or any of the other tributes from the Seventy-fourth games would not have sparked or touched the people of the districts as much as she had. And even though Snow tried with all his might to show the people she was just a puppet, his tool, they saw past it to the girl who is on fire, to the Mockingjay. They hadn't always seen past the other victors, but they know this girl, who brought humanity to the games, is different from all the rest.

Early in the morning on Sunday, Katniss kisses Finnick gently as she wiggles out of bed and gets ready to go hunting. This will be their last Sunday to hunt before the mission. She likes hunting with Gale, they move as a team of one mind and body. Even if these woods weren't their woods it is still a familiar feeling. When they see each other at the fence they smile, real smiles and walk out into the wilderness together. They have a good day getting game and talking. They sit in a tree in an old familiar way, like when they were younger. He sits leaning up against the trunk and she sits facing him, but leaning against his legs, her legs straddling the limb. "I miss this." She admits lazily.

"Me too Catnip." He agrees. His gray eyes are light with happiness.

"We really could have run away that day before the reaping…you know if we didn't have all the kids." She smirks, thinking of how the conversation had bothered her then. She would never leave Prim, but now, looking back, it is funny in a dark woeful way.

"Yea too bad we had all those kids at such a young age. We had what six and you were only sixteen." He teases. They always included their mothers as part of their kids, because they wouldn't have survived without them either.

"You were only eighteen." She counters. Their tongue-in-cheek assessment of their situation is new for them. They never discussed the kids actually being theirs or any innuendo of such, only that they called them their kids. "I don't know if I will ever have kids. I didn't want them back then after having to raise so many, but now I am still not sure even with the hope for an easier future." She confesses almost embarrassedly.

He nods his head in understanding. He knows not to tell her that he wanted/ wants to have kids, but only with her. He knows that telling her she would be an amazing mother and he has seen it first hand would make her pull away. He doesn't want that, not now that they are really coming back together. "We better head back. Greasy Sae is probably wondering where dinner is." He says lightly. This time she nods in agreement and swings off the branch landing on the ground in a perfected crouch. He follows and they head back into the gray underground abyss of District Thirteen.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: First, I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it!

Second, just to let anyone who wonders know, Peeta already got his wonderful happy ending story in the real books with Katniss and I do not intend on changing it, adding to it or putting their relationship into a new scenario. So my fics will never be about her and him getting together, sorry.

Third, I am sorry for any errors. I am trying to improve my writing as I get constructive feedback. I hope it is working. I hope the quotes are easier to read as I have been trying to segregate speakers.

This chapter will mainly be a flash back of her games, since going into war is a similar effect and would trigger a response of some sort.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter Thirteen

District Two is like a fortress for the military of the Capitol. It has a giant mountain that contains all of their military facilities, it is called The Nut. And it is going to be a hard one to crack. Gale, along with Beetee and a few other higher ups in the District Thirteen military strategize tirelessly over how to crack it. They know that if The Nut doesn't fall, neither will the Capitol anytime soon.

Katniss loves watching Gale in his glory of planning. He gets the same look of concentration he gets when working on or making up new snares and traps. She can tell he is really in his element. She, on the other hand, feels like she is back in her games, fighting people and having Haymitch help direct her along the way.

Haymitch hates watching Katniss over the live feed as she fight. It reminds him all too much of her games and watching her fight to survive. He wants her to just be able for once to rest, but knows that rest will either come when they win or in death. He hopes it's the former, but sometimes with Katniss one never knows for sure. It is often hard to follow her thoughts as she is an act first then think person, but she is enough like him that he can guess it before it happens.

Her games were the first ones since his first year mentoring that hit him hard. He was constantly afraid for her. He stayed fairly sober and never took his eyes off of her. He did not worry about Farve, her district partner; he had been dead before the games actually started. Haymitch would not waste time on someone who did not care about themselves. Katniss cared, not for herself, but for Prim and he guessed her friend Gale.

He had some interactions with Katniss in the Hob before her games. He would only buy her rabbits if he was sober enough when she would be there. He always tried to pay her extra, but she never took it. She would only take what was fair. He liked that. He had known her father, but more than anything he was intrigued by this strong girl who had taken over so many responsibilities as a young child. He admired her and that is why he would buy her rabbits. It is a hard task getting under Haymitch's skin, getting his admiration, but somehow a little girl with the odds stacked against her had. That is why he tried to bring her home. That is why now, sometimes when he sees her breaking, he wishes he hadn't for her own sake. But he knew that she would not die without a fight and no matter what he did as a mentor she would have probably made it home anyway. He knows she will win this war just like she won her games, fighting and a life of guilt over the dead.

After another excruciatingly long day, Katniss lays in her bunk thinking about the events leading up to her games and her games. The fighting people, who don't necessarily want to fight, is taxing on Katniss's mind. It conjures up all sorts of stress and games related memories.

**Flash Back**

_It is nearly time for the reaping; Prim shirt is coming un-tucked in the back. Forcing myself to stay calm I tell her to "tuck your tail in, little duck". I smooth the shirt back in place. She giggles and quacks at me. I love my sister more than anything and always have an urgent need to protect her. I am wearing one of my mother's dresses from her apothecary days. She has done my hair in an intricate braid. I guess I followed Gale's advice to wear something pretty. Who knows, I am not a very "pretty" girl in the same sense that Madge or Prim are. _

_We make our way to the square and sign in. Prim is so nervous, this is her first reaping and even though she has only one slip out of thousands, I know she is scared. Everyone is. I take her to the twelve year old section and I make my way to the sixteen year old section. I search out Gale who is standing in the eighteen year old section. He offers me a wary smile. It is his last year. He has forty-two slips with his name in it, I am nervous for him. I have twenty-two slips my self. _

_The reaping starts and the mayor reads the history of Panem like he does every year. Then Effie Trinkett comes up to the podium and greets us in her high-pitched Capitol accent. It's the same greeting every year, "Happy Hunger Games! And may the odds be ever in your favor!" She wears pink this year. All over pink; hair, make-up and clothes. _

_Gale looks back at me again and I find myself worrying about him. I wish I could tell him there are still thousands of slips in the bowl. Effie's voice rings out over the crowd, "Ladies First!". She waddles over to the girls bowl in her ridiculously high heels and pulls a name out. "Primrose Everdeen." She announces when she makes her way back to the podium. Everything stops. I see my life flash before my eyes. Prim is my life and hers is about to be taken away from me. As I see her pass my section I run out. The other kids in my section move out of my way, expecting me to do this. "Prim, Prim wait!" I scream into the crowd as I make my way in front of her, blocking her from the stage and Effie. At that moment I could swear I thought Effie was evil. I wanted to kill her for pulling out Prim's name. I had to protect my sister. "I volunteer, I volunteer as tribute!" I call out. They debate the legality of how to volunteer, but the mayor sadly tells her to just let me up._

_Prim clings to me, wailing for me not to. I turn to her trying my best to keep the tears from coming and to keep my composure, I forcefully tell her to let go. Gale comes up and pulls off Prim. His voice catches, "Up you go Catnip." He takes the still screaming and flailing Prim and carries her to my shocked mother. When he sees she has become useless again he takes her to his mother and takes his place back in his section. _

_It's all I can do to pray he remembers our pact. That if one of us has to go to the Hunger Games the other will stay behind to take care of our families. Effie asks me my name as I stand on the stage next to her. "Katniss Everdeen." I say quietly. _

"_I bet that is your sister, can't have her stealing all of the glory can we!" Effie says. I want to smack her so bad; I have to clench my fist to hold myself from doing so. "Katniss Everdeen your female tribute. Let's give her a round of applause." Effie shrills. She seems so excited to finally have some action in District Twelve. _

_To my, and I guess Effie's, surprise no one claps. Everyone stays silent, telling the world that they do not condone or agree to this. They are against this. Then, one by one, they all give me an old District Twelve sign. They kiss three fingers from their left hand and raise them in the air towards me. It means thanks, admiration and good-bye to someone you love. It takes all of me not to cry. I keep my face stone, but I know my glistening eyes show them thanks. Haymitch comes staggering over to me and wraps his arm around my shoulders and tells everyone he likes me that I have a lot of spunk. Really I think he will miss the occasional rabbit he would buy from me at the Hob. Then as if he is mocking the Capitol, he points to the camera, "More than you." He says. He is about to continue, but luckily for me falls off the stage and the attention for a moment is off of me so I can recollect myself._

_Effie who seems distressed at this quickly recovers. "Now time for the boys!" She reaches into the boys bowl and calls a boy I had seen at school and some in the Seam. He is seventeen, but horribly small for his age, still bigger than me, and underfed. His name was Farve Landon. The mayor reads over the Treaty of Treason and then we shake hands before we are escorted to the Justice Building. _

_I am locked in a luxurious room. There is a red velvet couch and all of the furniture is wood, velvet and detailed. I have never seen such nice things before. As I sit there feeling the velvet of the couch between my fingers the door opens and my mother and Prim come in. I hold Prim in my lap as if she were my own child. I comfort the crying child and promise her I will try to make it home for her. I will try. I may not have a shot in hell, but I will not die, for her, without a fight._

_I make my mother promise to stay for Prim. I don't allow her to cry. I refuse it. She does not have the right to cry, not now. I tell Prim that Gale will make sure they have meat and other things they need, but to sell her goat's milk and cheese and some of the medicines her and mother make. I tell them I love them and they are ripped from me too soon._

_Madge comes in next and quickly takes the pin she is wearing off and places in on me. I try to argue but she doesn't let me. She makes me promise that this will be my district keepsake I can wear in the arena. I do. She leaves and I know she is really and truly my friend, not just someone I have sat next to for years. _

_Gale comes in last and immediately I am in his arms. We go over strategy and he tells me to get my hands on a bow or make one, that this is just like hunting and I need to forget that they are children just like me. He tells me I need to make it home. I make him promise to take care of my sister and he says he will. He is drug out of the room by the peacekeepers. He is saying something but I can't make it out. The doors slam and lock shut. I am alone again. I have refused to cry. I will not let them see me as weak. I am not weak. _

_The peacekeepers come in and escort me to a car, the first one I have ever seen much less ridden in. Farve looks like he may have been crying, but now his face looks like he has given up completely. He has no hope and he has come to terms with it. _

_Once on the overly indulgent train, Effie shows us our rooms and I lay in mine for a few minutes, trying to catch my breath. I shower and change and soon Effie is back telling me to come to dinner._

_To my surprise Haymitch is there and looking much more sober than he had early. He gives me an innocuous nod, so subtle I don't think anyone else would have noticed if I had not looked in his direction. Although Haymitch and I never had a real relationship before the games, he knows who I am. I am the girl who sells him rabbits on occasion and he is the drunk who would try and over pay for them. I never let him. I only took what was fair. I think on some level he always respected that. He never bought Gale's rabbits, but it never occurred to me to ask why. _

_After dinner we went and watched the recaps of all the reapings. As expected the Careers from One and Two all volunteered with a sick sadistic smile on their faces. The rest of the tributes go by in a blur. The only ones standing out to me are, the girl from Five who looks like a fox, the boy from Ten who has a crippled foot and the two from Eleven, especially the girl. She is twelve just like Prim, but nobody had volunteered to take her place. The boy was like an ox. They almost look comical standing next to each other on the stage. _

_The next morning at breakfast I see Haymitch and Farve are already eating, in an awkward silence. "So what is the game plan?" I ask Haymitch once I get my food. _

"_Stay alive." He tells me darkly. I am so mad that I take my knife and throw it just past his head at the wall behind him. I am sure he felt the cool metal of the blade as it grazed his ear. It gets a good stick in between the seams of the wood paneling and makes me look better than I am. "You missed." He sneers, but his eyes show just a little bit of pride. _

"_No if I had wanted to hit you I would have." I reply back snottily. He looks me over searching my face for my bluff, but he knows I have none. He starts laughing maniacally. _

"_I may actually do my job this year, seeing as I have such a strong fighter." He says once his laughter died done. I nod my head in understanding. He knows, just as I do, Farve has already given up and I am still clawing at death's door to keep from being sucked in. Farve hasn't spoken once. I think the last words he actually said were to whoever came to tell him goodbye. I do not have any attachment to him, since I don't understand how he has no will to fight for his own life, even if it is a slim chance. He has already become a ghost, Haymitch knows it and so do I. _

"_So what can you tell me about how to survive?" I ask Haymitch. _

"_First thing is first, we will be arriving in the Capitol in a few minutes and you will be handed over to you prep team and stylist. Do not argue and do everything they say. They may be your only chances before you get in the arena to get sponsors. If they can make you desirable then people will not want you to die, then they will send money your way." He smirks as he says this, knowing full well I will be in my own personal hell in a few minutes. _

_The prep team is scary. They do not look like any people I have ever seen. Their bodies and hair are dyed an assortment of colors. They have piercings and other strange body enhancements. They scrub me down several times in different solutions to make sure they get off all the dirt and coal dust. They wax my whole body except the hair on my head. They buff and polish my nails. And once they have finished their rare brand of torture on me they look almost pleased. "There now you look almost human." One of them says as if I would be happy. I thank them for all their hard work and help, since I think they truly believe they are helping me. _

_They leave and I am left standing in the nude waiting for my stylist. When he comes in I am shocked at how un-Capitol he actually looks and even more shocked that he barely has a Capitol accent. He introduces himself as Cinna and is evaluating me as I am him. He circles around my body, taking it in, inspecting it; before he tells me I can put back on my robe. I join him in a sitting area where we eat lunch. He can see my disgust and evaluation of the Capitol opulence and comments on how despicable I must think them. He doesn't allow me time to answer just shrugs and goes into details about my costume for the night, the opening ceremonies. _

_In the past District Twelve has always dressed up as coalminers, except for one year where they were completely naked and covered in black dust. I am just happy that neither of those options are the direction he is taking it, but am overwhelmed with fear when he tells me I will be lit on fire._

_I am dressed in a shiny leather body suit that covers my whole body. I have lace up, knee high boots on. I am also wearing a cape and head dress with red, yellow and orange flares. Cinna has explained that the fire is synthetic and won't hurt us, but I am still more than a little skeptical. I look at Farve who is just standing there like a corpse already, waiting for instructions. "I will pull off your cape, if you pull of mine." I say only half joking. _

_He gives me a blank stare, "What's the point? Die now or die later." He shrugs and we are called to the chariot. Once on Cinna lights us on fire. He holds my chin in his hand and tells me to keep my head high, smile and wave, make the crowd fall in love with me even more. I am not sure how to do this; this kind of thing has never been something I am good at. But once we are moving and I see myself in all of my fiery glory I can't help but smile. I put on a show just like Cinna wants. Farve stands there, dead to the world. There is no life in his movements or eyes. _

_At dinner that night, everyone is congratulating me on my success. The crowd loved me and I am all anyone is talking about, according to Effie who is apparently in the know. Farve is ignored for the most part, seeing as he isn't so full of life anyway. I wonder if this is how it is every year in the District Twelve suite, two already given up dead kids who are not even encouraged to make it through. I can tell Haymitch has mixed emotions. He says one thing, that he wants me to do anything I can to survive, but his eyes tell me to try and find an easy dignified way to die in the arena. I can't help but think what must be so horrible about winning if even the victors don't seem to enjoy it. I shake the thoughts from my mind. I have to win for Prim. Watching the recaps of the ceremonies I can tell I stole the show. Most of the camera time is on me. _

_The next morning, Haymitch instructs me to steer clear of archery. I am not to let anyone know how good I am. I must save that for the private sessions with the gamemakers. I never thought he paid much attention to me back home, but he must have to already know what my greatest skill is. Farve has none and he refuses to even join in on the strategizing. The next three days goes the same. I try to learn skills from all of the centers. I avoid archery. Farve just wonders around aimlessly putting out little effort. I eat lunch with Rue the little girl from Eleven. I know it is not smart to get attached to someone before the games, but we both offer each other company and love. We eat dinner and Haymitch and I sit and discuss different scenarios I could encounter and what to do. He doesn't ever give me answers just prompts and makes me come up with the solutions. It would be fun if it weren't for the reason. I have always been good at figuring out how to survive and Haymitch once again seems contradicting in his pride and sadness. We are sarcastic and short with each other, but we get each other so it is not too often taken in offense. We fight and bicker, but what else would you expect from two people so similar. It irks me that I am so similar to the town drunk, but here I have realized there is much more to it than I think._

_The fourth day is our private sessions with the gamemakers. I am the last to go. I am called only ten minutes after Farve, clearly he did nothing; he spent the least amount of time in there. I walk in and the gamemakers are all sitting around drinking, joking and admiring a roast pig. I take a few practice shots with the bow then do some impressive shooting, even taking out one of the center light to make a fireworks like explosion. Some of the gamemakers look up and nod, but the rest continue to ignore me. I am not one who is known for keeping my temper in check or acting rationally all the time. I lose it. I send my arrow through the apple in the roast pig's mouth and stick it to the wall behind it. The gamemakers look at me in shock; one even falls over in a punchbowl. I bow and thank them for their consideration before throwing the bow to the ground and walking out without being dismissed. _

_When I get back to my floor. I run to my room and lock the door despite Haymitch's calls. I cry for what feels like forever. The last time I cried is when I was eleven and was watching my mother, sister and I starve and had failed to protect us. I had stooped so low as to look through trash cans to find discarded food. I made the mistake of looking through the baker's cans when his witch of a wife came out and started swinging her broom at me and threatened to call the peacekeepers if I didn't leave at once. I turned and ran to the side of the bakery and sat under a tree. I cried for the first time over my father's death and being a failure. I had let him down. There was a clatter in the kitchen and soon the youngest baker boy was outside with two burnt loaves of bread. He had a nasty whelp on his face. He tore off some of the charred bits and tossed them into the pig pin before throwing the rest of the two loaves at my feet. He turned without even looking at me and went back inside the bakery. I ran all the way home with the two loaves and we ate that night. That was the beginning of my hope. I had meant to thanks him the next day at school and when we looked at each other we both quickly turned away. I looked down and saw the first dandelion of spring and memories of what my father had taught me flooded back in and I knew we would make it then. _

_So tonight I cry out all of the pint up tears I have been holding in, trying to be the strong one. I cry because I fear I may have gotten them killed, or hurt my own chances of making it back to them. When I have cried myself out, I showered and made my way to dinner. I keep my head down. I am not ready to look at anyone or discuss the mess I made. Haymitch asks Farve what he showed the gamemakers and as usual Farve just looks down and shrugs. I finally take in a deep breath preparing myself for the onslaught of curses I will get when I tell Haymitch what I have done. He looks over at me with a smirk, "And you Sweetheart? What did you do that would cause you to lock yourself in your room?" _

"_Shot an arrow at the Gamemakers." I say, my voice only barely wavering. As a response I get a blanketed "What?" from the shocked members of the table. Haymitch shakes his head, but has a mischievous smile on his face._

"_From the top Sweetheart." He demands. I explain everything that happened and when I am done Haymitch looks proud. Effie tells me it serves them right for ignoring me just because I am from District Twelve. She looks around nervously for a second then relaxes into her usual state of up-tightness. _

"_What will they do? Will they hurt my family? Arrest me?" I ask nervously. _

"_No. They can't divulge any information so all of those would be too much of a hassle they will just make your life a living hell in the arena." Haymitch tells me. I calm some, as long as Prim is okay, so am I. _

"_Didn't they already promise us that anyways?" I ask sarcastically. Haymitch howls a dark laugh. Farve shakes his head and the others sit there unsure of how to respond. _

_That night we sit and watch the scores. I sit tightly in between Cinna and Haymitch. I am not sure why, but I am comforted by being near them. Haymitch reminds me of home in some weird way and Cinna is always so calm it helps my own jitters. The Careers all score very well in the 8-10 range. Everyone else is in the 4-7 range with the exception of Thresh, the boy from Eleven, he got a 10 and. Rue did well scoring a 7. Farve received a 3 as we suspected he did nothing to impress the judges. The shock though was me. I got an 11. Haymitch hoots loudly and clasp me tightly. Cinna hugs me softly and everyone offers me congratulations. I am so stunned I sit there with my mouth open. _

_During the interview the next day the other tributes played the parts I was sure they would. Glimmer, the girl from One was sexy. Cato and Clove from Two were sociopaths. The girl from Five, Fox-face as I had started calling her, was crafty. Thresh was a beast. Rue was adorable. Farve was, well he just sat there and refused to answer questions or look at anyone. I did my best to follow Cinna's advice to be myself, but a happier version. I guess it was the nerves because I twirled and giggled two things I wasn't sure I knew how to do. I got a huge applause; the people of the Capitol must really be eating me up. _

_That night I say goodbye to Haymitch and Effie. They have to leave to go to the mentor center for the game and secure more sponsors for me. I think they gave up on the boy who has given up on himself. They focus solely on me now. _

_The next morning Cinna wakes me and takes me to the roof where we load a hovercraft. I am injected with a tracking chip and Cinna has me shower and change into the clothes I will be wearing in the arena. He makes sure I eat, even though I only pick at my food, I am too nervous. And he makes sure I drink. He tells me if he were allowed he would be betting on me. And that seems to calm me, knowing I have his confidence. I load myself into the glass cylinder that will take me into the arena. _

_I stand, sixty second on my disk and when the gong sounds that the games have begun I run to the nearest back pack. I pause for just a second as I see Farve walk up to Cato, holding out his arms practically begging Cato to kill him. Cato happily obliges. During this time a boy from eight tries to grab the bag out of my hands and as we wrestle for it, Clove sends a knife into his back, his blood shooting onto my face. I quickly shove his corpse off of me and take the bag, running towards the woods. Clove sends a knife at me, but my hunters ears allow me to hear it and I pull the bag up to protect my head. The knife sticks into my bag and I turn around and smile a snide thank you to Clove. _

_I run until I can't run anymore. Once I feel I am far enough away from all the other tributes I look in my bag. I have a water bottle, but no water, Iodine to purify water, rope, twine, a small fist aid kit, a sleeping bag and some dark glasses. I then think about Rue. I had not seen her at the cornucopia and pray she had gotten away. I am sure she had. She is smarter than the Careers will ever give her credit for. _

_I was hoping to have gotten the bow and arrow I had seen, but Glimmer had gotten to them first. I will be able to make do for now with a knife and twine, but hopefully I will get my bow since I know I will not have a chance physically against any of the other tributes without it. _

_I search for water for what feels like days. At night I sleep high in a tree. A girl starts a fire close to where I am camped up high in a tree and the Careers find her and kill her. They pass by me several times, shouting angry words about me. They are looking for me, but seem to be looking everywhere but up, thankfully. _

_Finally, after asking Haymitch for water and being denied, I figured it is probably because water is near by; I stumble/crawl onto a stream. I fill my bottle with water and add some iodine. I wait for what feels like forever, but probably isn't long enough, to drink. I drink hungrily and when I have had my fill I refill the bottle and clean myself some in the stream. I get a squirrel and cook it on the hot stones by the bank of the stream. I hope it cooks the meat enough; I would hate to die from food poisoning. I don't want to start a fire as it would signal the Careers to where I am._

_I am suddenly awoken by the smell of a fire one night. I look around and notice a large wall of flames coming towards me. I quickly get myself down and out of the tree and take off in the direction of the animals. Haymitch was right, the gamemakers are after me. Fire balls are being shot at me while I run away from the fire. I am not quick enough for one and it sears my leg. I quickly place my hands over the burning spot on my leg without thinking to smother the flame. As fast as the fire started it disappears. I find myself dry heaving from the smoke inhalation and eventually wear myself out as I fall into a cool stream trying to subside my burning hands and leg. (Cinna told me he cried because it was his fault this was happening, he presented me as the girl on fire and the gamemakers were making sure I was.)_

_I am drifting off into an exhausted slumber from the mere shock to my system, when I hear people coming. I force myself to wake and look up just in time to see the Career pack heading my way. I stumble my way back through some trees and scurry up one. My hands and leg are killing me as I grab hold of the branches. I finally get far enough where I don't feel like I am in immediate danger from them. _

"_How are you doing?" I call down. I know this is a show and even though it may be stupid to taunt them, I do it anyway._

"_We're fine. How have you been?" Cato calls back, a sinister sneer plastered on his face._

"_It's been a little hot for my liking." I respond coolly smirking at my wittiness._

"_Why don't you come down?" Cato calls back, licking his lips as if he is expecting his dinner. _

"_No I'm good…you can come up if you would like." I say tauntingly. I know their body masses will not be held be the tree and I can still climb higher, they are not aware of this though._

"_I think I may." Cato starts to climb the tree. I climb a bit higher just to be safe. I hear a loud crack and Cato is on the ground with a loud thud. Glimmer rolls her eyes at him and she starts to climb up. She only gets slightly higher before she falls to the ground too. Irritated that they can not reach me Glimmer tries to shoot me, but misses by a long shot. I climb to where the arrow landed and grab it._

"_Missing something?" I hold it up tauntingly. The people of the Capitol must really be enjoying this show. _

_Finally the girl from District Four tells them that they should just camp out at the bottom of the tree since I can't get down without them noticing anyway. They argue over the stupidest things. I wonder how long it will be before they just start killing each other off. As the anthem plays that night I see two white eyes beckoning me to pay attention. It is Rue. She points above my head and I see a tracker jacker nest. I start to saw away at the branch it is on with my knife. My hands are bleeding from the burns. When the anthem goes off, I stop I do not want them to hear me. I go back down to my perch and will wait until morning to finish. _

_A white parachute with a silver box drops near me. I grab it and open it. Inside is some burn ointment. I apply it to my hands and legs and the effect is immediate. In the early morning hours I see that all of the Careers have drifted off, Glimmer failed at her post to stay awake. I finish sawing the branch and it drops down on them. I get stung by three of them and quickly pull the stingers out before the wounds swell over. I climb out of the tree. Cato, Marvel and Clove had taken off to the nearby stream. Glimmer and the girl from District Four were on the ground dead. I try to pull the bow and arrow out of Glimmer's swollen green hands. The tracker jacker venom has taken its effect on me and I am not sure if I am hallucinating or not. I finally manage to get it and stumble off in another direction. I fall in a small clearing and pass out. I have nightmares constantly about my father's mine accident, about Gale and Prim and about the games. When I come to, Rue is sitting near me looking after me. She has placed chewed up leaves on my tracker jacker wounds._

"_Thanks." I say. She nods timidly. "How long was I out?" I ask. _

"_Two days." She says. _

"_Allies?" I ask. Again she nods and we shake on it. We hunt and forage for some food. And as we eat our dinner she catches me up on what I missed and we talk about our homes. I am under the impression that not all of the Districts have as easy going Peacekeepers as we do. I don't remember the last time someone was whipped or shot, but in Eleven it happens all the time. She tells me about the Career's food and supply pile and I get a wickedly good idea. I whisper in her ear my idea to destroy it and how we will distract them so I can. She agrees and the next morning we get started. We set up three fire sites with lots of green wood to make more smoke. I head to the lake where they have their supplies and Rue starts the fire on the first site and moves among the trees to the next one. _

_When I get to the Career's camp I see Fox-face leap around trying to miss certain marks on her way to the goods. She is very clever. Somehow she has figured out their code. I figure out that it is mined and that my best bet is to set off all of the mines at once if I want to destroy all of the food. I shoot one, two, three arrows and rip open a bag of apples that tumble down the pile setting off a chain reaction of the mines. Everything is blown to bits and I am blown backwards. I scramble back to my hiding place. I can't hear out of my left ear and am off balance. I see the Careers run back to their camp. It is funny to watch Cato's mind break. He throws a massive fit and snaps the neck of the boy from Three who set up the mines. The Careers take off again to search for whoever blew their supplies to bits. I eventually regain some hearing and balance and make my way to Rue's and my meeting place. (Haymitch and Finnick had told me once after the games that this was truly one of the best plays in game history.) _

_She isn't there and I sing out our signal. I check the last fire site and notice it hasn't been lit. I start to panic. I hear her young voice scream out for me and I run towards it. When I get there I see her trapped in a net and Marvel thrusting a spear in her stomach. I shoot him in the neck before he can even turn around and look at me. His cannon sounds instantaneously. I cut Rue down and hold her head in my lap, trying to give her comfort._

"_Did you get their supplies?" She asks._

"_Yes, I blew up every last bit of it." I say. She smiles at me. _

"_Promise me you will win." She pleads._

"_I promise." I tell her, a tear falling down my cheek. _

"_Sing for me." She barely whispers as she is drifting off into death._

_I sing for her. It comes out choked from my tears. And when I finish, her cannon sounds and I close her eyes and lay flowers around her body. I take her pack and place it with my things and cry over her for another minute. When I get up, I collect my things and give her the same goodbye the people of District Twelve gave me. I run off and start crying in a tree to myself. I feel like a small piece of me has been ripped out. Another parachute falls to me and I open it and find bread that Rue had told me about. It is the bread of District Eleven. Before I eat it I look to the sky, "Thank you District Eleven. I am sorry for your daughter." I say before I take a bite and eat it with salty tears streaming down my face. After that I become numb to the games. I hunt for food and make sure I drink enough water. I lose track of who has died and when a feast is called I don't think twice about going. _

_I get there early and see Fox-face leaving the inside of the cornucopia to get her bag from the table. I run to get mine and am tackled by Clove. We wrestle and she throws insults at Rue. Thresh hears and he beats her to death with a rock. He tells me we are even. I run off back to the woods. I watch from the edge as Thresh and Cato battle. Cato eventually wins after hours, but two cannons sound and I am confused as to what Fox-face died from. (I found out later she ate the wrong kind of berry in the woods, nightlock.) _

_The next day, Cato and I are driven to the cornucopia by hungry wolf looking mutts. We climb up and are at a stalemate. He finally makes the first move towards me but slides off instead. I hear his screams and pleas. I lean over the edge and see his blue eyes for once look human. I send an arrow through his head to end his misery. I am not joyous over winning. I sit on top of the cornucopia and cry. I am announced the winner and when the hovercraft comes I still do not move. I sit and cry for all of the pointless bloodshed. An attendant has to come down to carry me into the hovercraft. _

_This, Haymitch tells me, is the point in which the people of the districts finally made me their symbol, it is the fact that I had won, but refused to acknowledge it. I was so overcome with sadness for the ones who had died that I could not even care that I was alive. I brought humanity to the games. I was not a happy, ruthless victor. I was a saddened, broken victor. I really didn't believe I deserved to live anymore than anyone else in the games. _

Finnick comes into Katniss's bunk and sees her silently crying. He lifts her up some and lets her continue to lie in his lap while he strokes her hair. Finally she opens her eyes with a gasps. "Where are we?" She asks a little dazed. She felt like she was still sitting on the Cornucopia crying for the children who died instead of her.

"We are in Two little flower. What is wrong?" He asks seriously concerned, she is not one to cry too often.

"I was in the games. I just feels so….guilty for living sometimes." She says with her breath still shaking.

"You should never feel guilty…it's _their_ fault and that is what we are fighting against so no one will ever have to be put in that situation again." He tells her gently. He understands the guilt, but no one has ever talked about it. She is the first victor to actually show it.

She starts to feel nauseous and runs to the small bathroom in the hall. She throws up and Finnick follows her to help her back to her bed. She is tired and wants to sleep. They do and in the morning she is sick again. She isn't running a fever so she brushes it off as stress. Finnick buys it, but not everyone does, but no one says anything.


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews, favorites, follows and alerts! I really appreciate them! Sorry for any errors. Sorry for the slower update this week…had a couple Haymitch days.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games Series or any of the Characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 14

"Congratulations Ms. Everdeen, you are pregnant." The doctor says to a stunned Katniss and an amused, smug Johanna.

Johanna had dragged Katniss to the doctor on base after Katniss had spent yet another morning retching. She couldn't figure out how clueless Katniss could be over her symptoms. Everyone other woman on base knew, but Katniss kept blaming it on stress. Johanna really didn't see how the men in their squad didn't get, but apparently Mockingjay's words are gospel so no one argues. She figures her and brainless will have to stop fighting each other now when then they both need to let out a little frustration and probably Katniss will be sent back to Thirteen. She doesn't want her to go and knows for sure Katniss will raise hell to stay.

After what seems like an eternity, Katniss finally picks her jaw off the ground and with a quivering voice asks, "How?" Both the doctor and Johanna give her a look of disbelief. Is she really that brainless to not know where babies come from, she should be an expert at it by now.

"How do you think?" Johanna scoffs. Katniss looks beyond confused and almost into the land of insanity.

"I thought the shots they give me here are the same as the Capitol ones?" Katniss is looking up, but at no one. Her eyes are glazing over and her voice sounds distant.

Johanna rolls her eyes. "Didn't you think to ask what someone is injecting you with?" Katniss shakes her head 'no' slowly, eyes not blinking still far off in the distance. She stopped questioning injections after the tracker was placed in her arm before her games. "They are freakin' vitamins and immunizations." Johanna shouts, waving her hands in front of the catatonic Katniss.

"Living underground depletes your immune system and you don't get as many vitamins naturally as you would above ground. Like Vitamin D. Plus living in such enclosed quarters allows disease to travel fast." The doctor adds. Hoping this clears up the confusion for the young girl.

"Thanks Doc." Johanna says as she gets up to go, pulling Katniss along with her. The doctor hands her a bag of different vitamins that Katniss should take and some pamphlets on how to keep the baby healthy. Katniss stumbles along after Johanna, being pulled by the arm jerkily.

Johanna jerks her around base until they reach their group's quarters. She has a wicked grin on her face as she announces to the group of men that there will be a baby Mockingjay soon. She lets go of Katniss as she flings the shocked girl in front of her.

"How?" a just as confused Finnick asks.

Johanna cracks up at this. She laughs so hard tears are coming out of her eyes and her sides burn. "God you two are meant for each other." She finally wheezes as she comes up for air. "That's the same question brainless here asked the doctor."

"But how? I thought…the shots." Finnick looks at Johanna flabbergasted by the situation. He is happy over the thought, but confused and concerned because he knows Katniss won't stop fighting until Snow's heart is pierced by her arrow. Johanna explains about the shots here and how they aren't to prevent this kind of thing and probably only helped.

Finnick picks Katniss up in his arms and squeezes her tightly in his excitement. She still has yet to really acknowledge anything or come out of her daze. He kisses her face all over and sits her back down on the ground she is still staring off into the distance. "Katniss, little flower, we are going to have a baby flower!" He coos to her. When she doesn't respond he looks over at Johanna who is still wearing her 'I knew it' smirk. "Did they give her something?" He asks.

"No she spit out the same questions you did, but has been zombie Katniss since. I had to drag her back here." Johanna responds annoyed that she has to take care of the Mockingjay and that she has lost her sparring buddy.

Finnick cups Katniss's face with his large hands that cover it almost completely. His sea green eyes look hopefully into her glazed over gray ones. "Little Flower. Please say something…anything. I know you are young, but you said you would think about it one day. One day has come sooner than we both thought, but it has come. Please, please Katniss say something." He begs for a response, any response. At this point it didn't matter if it was happy, sad or angry. He just needs to know she is still there.

"Finn?" She coughs out in a whisper.

He looks at her for recognition. "Yes my lovely little flower." He whispers back to her.

"I…I need to kill Snow." She says quietly with a deathly resolution that sends a chill up his spine.

"I know Kat, I know." He hangs his head in defeat.

She looks at him, her head cocked to the side not really understanding his stance. He looks defeated to her and she doesn't know why he would be. Does he not want the baby? Or does he not want Snow dead? Or both? Her mind is going a mile a minute and she is having a hard time forming complete thoughts on the subject at hand. She isn't sure what is going on anymore. Finally he looks back up into her eyes that have cleared some and she asks, "Do you not want Snow dead...Or do you not want the baby?" her head still cocked to the side as if this is really a conundrum for her.

He is confused by her questioning at first, but then a smile creeps up on his lips as he realizes she isn't saying no to the baby, she just doesn't want to think about happily ever after until Snow is no longer an issue for her. "I want the baby and Snow dead." He says darkly cheerful.

For people who are looking at the exchange between the two whore victors they would believe both are mad. There are a few things everyone knows about Katniss. One being she loves to fight. If she isn't fighting in the war she is fighting Johanna. Two she and Finnick go at it like jack rabbits whenever she isn't fighting. And three Katniss likes her white liquor, a habit they assume she got from her mentor. These three facts about Katniss are not good ones for babies. It is written on all of the bystanders' faces that they see nothing but doom for this child if Katniss doesn't stop her current behavior.

Gale and Peeta both watch like this is their worst nightmare coming true, yet they can't stop watching or wake themselves up. They are as shell shocked as Katniss, but are destroyed by the news. Gale thinks this is some sick joke Katniss and Jo are playing on them. They are always coming up with awful pranks for the boys in their group. For Peeta this put the final nail in the coffin of his idealistic love for Katniss. He is no longer delusional in his thoughts that maybe one day she would see him as more than the baker's boy or a friend. But both, no matter how they may feel about the situation, will die to protect the girl with the arrow who set the world on fire, because she is the one who will set them all free.

Boggs curses in his head. This is not good news for him. He knows Coin has it out for the young girl and will use this to hurt her. She won't ever let Katniss live through this revolution; she has more than spelled out her objectives for their storm on the Capitol. Use Katniss as bait for President Snow and blow them both to bits. What Coin doesn't know is that Boggs has every intention of going against orders.

Johanna laughs to herself. She really hopes this kid is smarter than its parents. More though, she hopes Snow's reign ends, because this kid, above all other victors' kids, will be tortured and warped. It will be sent into the games to win and then brought out to be used like its parents. She shudders at the thought of the fate of the unborn child.

"Should we call Haymitch and our families?" Finnick asks. She shrugs hesitantly. She isn't sure she wants to tell them. They will all want her to go back to District Thirteen and she refuses to go until Snow is dead. Finnick takes it as the go ahead and calls Haymitch first. Out of everyone he is the most nerve-racking call for them. Finnick is afraid he will kill him and Katniss just doesn't want him to be disappointed in her.

Finnick thrust the phone at her cowardly not wanting to be the one to tell him. "Haymitch?" Katniss asks when he grunts his hello.

"Yes Sweetheart? You feeling any better?" He asks with sarcastic concern. He, like Johanna, knew what was wrong, but prayed it wasn't true.

"Well yes. No. I don't know." She whispers trying to hold in her fear.

"Fish Boy knocked you up didn't he?" He says accusingly bitter. She nods her head silently, but realizes he can't hear her head move.

"Yes. I'm sorry Hay. Are you mad at me?" She chokes out.

"No. I could never be. I know you don't want to come back here to do the normal thing in your condition, but I will have Cinna make you a new uniform. One with even better protection, especially around the center. Does anyone else know?" He says trying to sound caring, but it still comes off bitter.

"Just our group. Jo announced it to everyone, because I left myself for a little bit." Katniss continues to whisper. She is still waiting for the barrage of curses and yells for her stupidity.

He sighs deeply. "Put Jo on the phone please….and Katniss, stop drinking and fighting for fun." He knows she will have a hard time quitting both at the same time, he just hopes for the sack of the child she is carrying she will. _God she is just a child herself. How could Fish Boy be so stupid? He had asked him before they left if they were being careful, apparently not._

"Okay…Hay I love you." She says barely audible, but he heard it and it made him smile. She hands the phone to Johanna who huffs exaggeratedly.

"Yea. What do you want? I didn't get her knocked up!" Johanna snaps at him in greeting.

"What the hell were you thinking? Telling the whole group? Coin is out to get her and you are just letting information about her that is this life changing slip out….no, no announce it!" He barks at her. Katniss and Finnick can hear him, not sure what he is saying, but they know he is livid.

"Well nobody told me were keeping secrets from the Ice Queen!" She yells back.

"Put Finn on the phone. Keep her safe and stop trying to fight her!" Haymitch shouts, his anger getting hold of him. He doesn't want Coin to find out about the baby. He is aware of Coin's plans for Katniss in the Capitol. She thinks she can keep information from Haymitch, but he has people too, who bug offices and are playing both sides.

"What you don't yell at the blessed bird princess but me you will screech at? And now you want to scream at Finn. He should have been your first stop before me!" She grumps back to him before shoving the phone at Finnick.

Finnick hesitantly holds the phone. He tries to hide behind his fake confident voice, the one he would use in the Capitol. "Hey Haymitch." He says almost cheerfully. "What can I do for you this fine evening?" Katniss and Johanna are looking at him shocked by his gall.

Haymitch's voice lowers to a growl. "What the hell happened? Why weren't you more careful? I didn't expect her to know anything about precautions, but you…Damn Finn. You made things a hell of a lot stickier."

"Look I thought the shots…well I thought they were the same as the Capitol ones. I didn't know." Finnick defends himself.

"I don't care. All I know is you better watch your back and hers. If you die out there she will too and so will your kid. You need to find people you trust and build a fortress around her at all times. Do I make myself clear? Or do I need to send you a step by step manual?" Haymitch sneers.

"What aren't you telling us?" Finnick demands.

"Coin has some plans. Make sure Katniss doesn't follow orders once you are in the Capitol." Haymitch growls and then slams the phone down not wanting to talk to the idiot who knocked up his Katniss.

Finnick hangs up the phone and scans the room quickly trying to follow Haymitch's advice. He knows Brutus, Gloss, Peeta and Johanna are all trust worthy. He is not sure about Gale. Gale would easily take Katniss away from him if he could, plus he is so wrapped up in strategy and weapons that he may by too far in to see clearly. He knows Katniss and Gale argue over what to do about The Nut. Gale wants to close off the exits by causing and avalanche and then explode it. Katniss doesn't want anyone to die the way their fathers did, enclosed underground in fire. For all of her ruthlessness she still has humanity to not want to watch others suffer something she knows is beyond painful.

Katniss touches his arm and draws him out of his concentration. The others in their group had left the area when they called Haymitch. She picks up the phone and hands it to him. He calls his family and Annie. "Hey Ma'." Finnick says when his mother answers.

"Oh, Finn. Thank goodness you are alright. I was worried about you. Is Katniss there is she alright?" His mother starts. She loves Katniss as if she were her own now. She sees what Finnick and half the nation see in the young girl. She understands it's not just her looks, but something so much deeper that draws you in and makes you feel for her.

"Well actually that's kinda what I am calling about….Katniss is….umm…We are going to have a baby." Finnick nervously says. The line is silent for a minute before he hears his mother gasp.

"Finn are you sure?" She asks. She doesn't know whether she is excited or frightened by the news.

"Yeah. Jo took her to the doctors today." He responds.

"Is she coming back to Thirteen…I mean she would have to right?" She inquires.

"Well…that's the thing…you know how she is. She won't calm until Snow is gone." He tells his mother. His mother knows Katniss trained harder than the men in their squad. She knows Katniss won't rest until Snow is gone, but she can't help but worry about her grandchild's safety.

"Well I guess congratulations are in order! You three stay safe now. I love you both." She says and he almost believes she isn't shaking in her worry. "Why don't you tell Annie the great news? She is right here." And she hands the phone to Annie.

"Hello?" Annie's quiet voice rings through the line.

"Hey Annie. You are going to be an aunt. Katniss and I are going to have a baby." He says gently.

"That's great Finn!" Annie shrieks like a little kid. "Now Katniss can come back and spend more time with me!"

"Katniss won't come back until the war is over." Finnick lets her down.

"Oh no….But the baby!" Annie cries over and over.

"It's okay Annie. You know we will take care of it. Everything will work out just beautifully. You will see." He comforts her. Katniss may be the only one not emotionally charged over this child he thinks. His mother and Annie are beside themselves. Haymitch is livid. Johanna is overly annoyed that her punching and drinking buddy is gone. Gale and Peeta looked like someone ripped out their hearts. Yes, Katniss is the only one who seems like it doesn't really matter. Yes she was shocked, but that would be expected.

"Oh Finn you must make sure she is okay. I love you both." Annie cries as she hangs up the phone.

"Okay now your turn!" Finnick smiles teasingly at Katniss who shakes her head no. She is firm in her decision. She refuses to call her mother and sister and tell them. Prim will beg her to come back and Katniss can't refuse anything to Prim, but she can't go back. Katniss walks to her bunk and lies down.

She doesn't know how she feels about this baby. Hell, she isn't sure she even ever wanted to have one. She loves Finn more than anything, but she is still seventeen almost eighteen. Too young for this. No freedom yet. Who knows if they will even make it out of the war in one piece. There are so many thoughts running through her head, but the only thought that is constant is to kill Snow. That is the thought she will listen to, all the other ones will find there way somehow.

Boggs comes into Katniss's bunk and bends down to her so they are eyelevel. "Katniss. I know there are a lot of changes going on, but I need you to listen. Do not go back to Thirteen unless our whole squad returns. And when we make it to the Capitol please follow my directions…they will not be the same as a certain President will be ordering. I need your trust." He eyes her seriously. She has known since their first day of training she could trust him. She nods her head in understanding.

"I trust you." She whispers and he gives her a small thankful smile as he stands back up and leaves her to rest. She will need it. The rebels will only be sending out small groups to fight while the heavy artillery finish plans on cracking The Nut. Once those plans are in full force there won't be much sleep for anyone.

Finnick decides to make more calls his first being to Katniss's mother and Prim. He knows they won't be happy that Katniss is continuing in her never ending quest to take down the Capitol.

"Hello?" A curious Prim answers.

"Hi Prim…its Finnick." He says trying not to sound too hesitant.

"Is Katniss okay?" Prim worriedly asks.

"Yes. Actually it is good news….Katniss is pregnant." He says hopeful the young Everdeen will not be upset by the information.

"She is?" She asks unbelievingly. "Is she coming back?"

"Yes she really is and no she won't. You know how she is she will fight until either she or Snow are dead. But I'm going to make sure she stays safe." He says reassuringly.

"How is she taking it?" Prim now is hesitant. She knows Katniss will make a wonderful mother, she did pretty much raise Prim, but she also knows Katniss's beliefs on having children and marriage. She doesn't think her sister would be too pleased with this new development.

"She seems okay. You know she doesn't really open up too often about her true feelings, so it's hard to tell how she is really taking it." He confesses honestly. "I gotta go. Let your mom know."

"Okay, I will. And Finnick please make sure she is safe." Prim says before she hangs up the phone.

Finnick hangs up and makes his final call. Cinna would at least pretend happiness for the couple. Effie will be thrilled. He suspects this will be good news for Effie, knowing once and for all Katniss is tied to someone other than Cinna. He has seen how she hovers around when Cinna and Katniss talk alone, not too close, but still making sure it is just talking. "Hey Cinna." Finnick says when he hears the phone pick up.

"Finn?" Cinna asks.

"Yeah. Before we get all into is Katniss okay spiel, let me just give you the news." Finnick begins tired from all the explaining. "Katniss is pregnant. She won't go back to District Thirteen until Snow is dead. You need to make an amazing new suit for her to protect her and the baby."

The line is quiet for a moment as Cinna collects himself. He feels like Finnick just launched his trident into his heart. Although he now loves Effie, there is always the lingering feelings he has for Katniss. He knows they were over and done with months and months ago, but still the thought ached in his heart. "Congratulations." Cinna says quickly recovering "The suit will be on its way be the end of the week. Is our bundle of fire excited?"

Finnick laughs. "Yea so excited her first words to me were she is going to kill Snow." They all know Katniss isn't someone who will share her feelings, so the absolutely ludicrousness of Cinna asking if Katniss is excited made him snap a little. He hangs up. Not meaning to be rude, but he wants to think about what Haymitch had told him and even let himself feel happy that he is going to be a daddy, something he always wanted but never thought it would come.

Katniss gets up after lying in bed for an hour, not sleeping, but not necessarily awake either. She had drifted in between the two states of consciousness as she tried to collect her thoughts. She thought about what Boggs had said to her and she does trust him. He had already proven he didn't have that strong of an allegiance to Coin. She walks around base trying to clear her mind from the millions of thoughts running through it when she notices Gale sitting up against a wall, elbows on his knees, face in his hands. She silently walks over and sits beside him. He doesn't look up but knows she is there, "Hey Catnip." He says dejectedly.

"Hey Gale. What are you doing?" She asks.

"Praying that this day, hell this life, is a nightmare and I am going to wake up and find you lying next to me in our house in the woods." He says trying to sound light, but it just comes off as dark and hurt.

Katniss doesn't know how to respond. She knows how Gale feels about her and maybe in a different life they would be together, but she knows he wouldn't be able to deal with her baggage now and doesn't expect him to. "I'm sorry…it's not like today has been a bowl of peaches for me either." She responds sarcastically, but not hostilely.

Gale looks up at her and laughs a dry bitter laugh as he realizes she isn't excited about the prospect of this child. He is starting to believe Finnick may be the only one happy with this turn of events. "I know Catnip, but you know you will be an amazing mother. You have years of experience and all of our kids turned out great." He jokes. He hates seeing her upset and will do anything to see her smile even if it trying to convince her she wants Odair's baby.

She glares at him but the corners of her lips upturn slightly that he knows she is only trying to hold back the smile forcing its way on her face. "It's a weird feeling you know…wanting something and not wanting it so much." She concedes. He is still her best friend despite everything and for some reason feels the old strange ability to open up to him.

"Yeah, I know. Are you going to go back to Thirteen?" He asks.

"No…not unless our whole squad does. Boggs doesn't trust Coin too much. Neither do I." She says, but it is more of a question, a test, to see where his loyalty lies.

"I go wherever you go. Like it or not, I will die to protect you. And if anyone…either side…tries to take you away from this world, I will not rest until they all rot in hell." He says damningly. It's not just a threat, but a promise. She nods her understanding and places her hand over his as a sign of gratitude. They are the same and sometimes little gestures say much more than a sonnet of words.

They part ways; Gale needs to get back to cracking The Nut and Katniss needs to find Finnick. As expected she finds him with Johanna deep in conversation. Someone would think Katniss would get jealous over Finnick and Johanna's relationship, but she knows it is only that of friendship. It would be like Finnick getting jealous over her and Johanna's relationship. Sure Johanna and Finnick had slept together once upon a time, long ago during her training and some afterwards, but it was never in any other way than deep friendship.

Katniss stood back watching them, so deep in conversation almost like they are plotting away. She admires how despite Johanna's short temper, Finnick always stays calm and collected, almost egging her on at times like he gets a kick out of it. Neither one notices her watching them and after ten minutes she clears her throat. They both look up at her. She is wearing a smirk on her face as they turn to see her. "Damn hunter stealth! How long have you been standing there?" Johanna says clearly annoyed that Katniss could easily sneak up on her.

"Ten minutes." Katniss says coolly as she breezes into the room and sits next to Finnick. "So what is so important that you two are plotting away?" She asks knowingly. She knew they were discussing her. It seems to be what everyone does. Talk about Katniss and how to 'save' her from herself. She likes Boggs because he comes straight out and tells her what's going on, not plotting around her.

"Discussing what Haymitch told us Lovely." Finnick says as if it is insignificant to her.

"Oh yes, and what did my dear mentor say to you?" Katniss says bitingly, more plotting around her. She figures it is the same thing Boggs had spoken to her about. Haymitch always knew secret information. Sometimes she isn't sure who has more power back in Thirteen, Haymitch or Coin.

Finnick looks warily over to Johanna who shrugs. What does she care? She always thought Katniss should be brought in on the plans before they were made, but all of her 'men' wanted to keep her in the dark, to 'protect' her innocence. Not like she had any anymore. "Coin is out for you." He stops to gauge her reaction, but she doesn't seemed shocked or even upset. She looks bored. "Hay wants us to protect you from whatever orders come down from Coin." He finishes.

She nods her head in understanding. "Boggs told me. He won't follow her orders. I trust him. Gale too." She states blankly. They both look at her incredulously. Johanna shakes her head as she smiles at the girl who always surprises her.

"See she already knows everything! Why do you two keep trying to keep her out of the loop, until the last minute? She has been upgraded for the next twenty minutes from brainless to fire girl." Johanna says annoyedly to Finnick. Katniss smiles at the small victory she has won, not only has she proven Finnick wrong that she can handle information, but she also got a small sign of respect from Johanna.

"We just want to protect you that's all." Finnick says to Katniss, but answering Johanna's question. Katniss again just nods and gives a small knowing smile. "So you really trust Boggs and Gale?" He asks suspiciously. They were the two he didn't really trust.

"With our lives." Katniss says patting her lower abdomen and then smiling back up at Finnick.

Finnick sighs as he gives into Katniss, hoping she knows what she is talking about. He trusts her judgment. "Alright Little Flower." He smiles at her and clasp her hand in his. "You wanna go somewhere and celebrate….not like we have to be careful now?" He asks knowing full well Katniss's appetite will be more now that she won't be able to get out some of her frustrations with Johanna.

She gives him a mischievous smile and leads him away. She looks back at Johanna, "Sorry Jo. It'll be another nine months until we can fight again. I am sure you could take down Gale if you could convince him fighting you is not like fighting a girl." She smiles over her shoulder at Johanna who rolls her eyes, but is seriously thinking about finding the brooding cousin of Katniss's.

They make it back to their bunk and block the door with a cot so someone would have a hard time coming in. They didn't really care if they had an audience but figured someone else might not want to see their show. Finnick's hands roam all over her body, but then linger on her lower abdomen where their baby lies. He trails his kisses from her lips, down her neck, over her shoulders, down her chest and when he gets to where his hands rest he whispers "I love you my baby flower." ever so lightly on her skin that his hot breath is tickling the sensitive area and sends a chill up her spine like an electric shock. Soon they are enraptured with each other again and again. Each time a different emotion is worked out; fear, hate, anger, and finally love and appreciation. This is how Katniss best communicates her feelings and by now he knows what each experience means. Fear for their child and them if this war ever goes belly-up. Hate and anger for both Presidents. Love and appreciation for their child and each other.

As they lay there after in a blissful calm, Finnick's hand resting protectively over Katniss's womb, they speak of the silly things that normal couples get to speak of. They joke over baby names and argue over the sex, Katniss thinks it's a boy and Finnick thinks it's a girl. They imagine the child's first words and first steps. Both cautious though not to let themselves really feel the happiness they imagine, they both know all too well that it can be viciously ripped away from them at any moment. No, they don't fool themselves into believing they are like any other normal couple. They can't. Most of their lives so far have had an ominous rain cloud looming over head raining on their parades and now they are waiting for it to pour.

Haymitch finds Chaff and drinks away his fear for the young victor, his anger at the careless Fish Boy and his sadness for the child to come if this rebellion fails. "He got her knocked up." He finally says.

Chaff nods taking in the depth of the statement. "Well….congratulations grandpop." Chaff says sarcastically. He knows his friend is torn up. He knows his friend loves the fiery bird, on so many different levels and ways that he couldn't imagine what is actually going through his mind.

Haymitch laughs. "Yes…I am sure that is what I will be. I am old enough to be her father so how else would they explain me to the child…the man who used to sleep with your mommy and at one time daddy…the man who your mommy cannot live without and vice versa. Yes grandpop will probably be the best way to hide all of the beautifully ugly truths." He says darkly.

"She won't come back and do the normal thing for a pregnant woman will she?" Chaff asks, but knows the answer. He has seen the fire in her eyes and it won't burn out until Snow is extinguished.

"Nope…and I think she is making the better choice…compared to coming back here and being handed over to him on a silver platter." Haymitch says. Chaff nods and they fall into a comfortable silence with the beverage that soothes their aching souls.


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it!

Sorry it's a little shorter than normal and for the longer waits in between post lately. I will try and get a few more chapters out this week. Please review; it helps motivate me to continue some when I am having a hard time motivating myself to write.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 15

_HE was on top of me. The smell of blood strongly overpowering the smell of the genetically altered roses that was ever so mixed with the metallic smell of blood coming from his mouth. HIS puffy, enhanced lips were forcefully, domineering mine. I could hear my sister's cries and pleas for help. It is all I can do not vomit and cry out it in utter pain. Pain in my shattered heart. How did I end up back here? Wasn't I in Two? How did I end up strapped to HIS bed again? I turn my head away from HIM and tied to a chair is a young girl with my almost metallic black hair and his sea green eyes. She looks at me tied to the monsters bed in disgust. My sister's screams get louder and more pained, making my heart wrench, but it's the young girl tied to the chair that stabs a knife into my heart and twists it. "You are weak" the young girl tells me. "I am ashamed to have a whore and murderer as my mother!" the young girl spits. My heart rate has sped up twenty times more, I can feel it in my ears and in my eyelids as I squeezes them shut to escape. HE laughs in my ear as HE thrust harder into me, "I made quite a lot of money on you and Finnick, and your daughter will bring in even more. Too bad he isn't around to watch." HE sneers. Finally I can't take it anymore, I give up, I scream for HIM. HE has finally taken everything from me. _

Katniss is thrashing and screaming in her bunk. Everyone runs in; her eyes are open, but are wild, feral. Finnick, the only one willing to go near the animal that used to be a girl, holds her body down. "SNOW!" she screams, a blood curdling scream. There is no doubt in the minds of the bystanders that this girl has been damaged and is out for blood.

"Katniss!" Finnick says forcefully. "You are having a nightmare. Wake up." She calms for a minute at the sound of his voice, but soon starts to shake uncontrollably in her cries. "Jo, get me some water." He commands. Johanna runs out to get a bucket of water, a method they picked up from Haymitch who ironically picked it up from the lost girl they are using it on. Johanna comes back and throws the cold water on the girl effectively making her shoot up looking for her knife. Katniss and Haymitch are so much alike that the rest of the group is trying their best to hold in the laughs at how the two mimic each other in most ways.

Katniss's eyes scan the room and lock onto Finnick's, they are still wild, but back in reality. She cautiously reaches her hand to Finnick's cheek. "Finn? You're still alive?" She asks.

"Of course little Flower….not dying until we are old and gray." He says with a smile.

She lets out a long exhale. Her heart rate slowing and her shaking subsiding. "The baby? She's not been born right?" Katniss asks.

"No…" Finnick starts as he places a hand on her womb, "She's still in there."

"Prim's okay too?" She questions going down the list of things that happened in her nightmare.

"Prim is safe with your mother, working to be a doctor in District Thirteen." He reassures her. She loses her grip though as she remembers the look on their daughters face and the words that came out.

"She's going to be ashamed of me." She mumbles. Finnick looks at her confused by the statement. Prim is the farthest thing from ashamed and always has been, even when her own mother and best friend were. Prim always stood up and supported Katniss. She sees his confusion. "The baby." She whispers. No tears fall from her face any more, but she looks broken beyond repair. Her eyes pleading, begging for it not to be true. That her own child won't hate her.

Finnick holds her tightly. "Oh baby. No. Our baby won't ever be ashamed of you. Don't ever think that again." He says in a soft, but very demanding voice. She nods her head into his chest and he holds her. He has had the same worries. He worries what people will tell their child when it gets older. That some Capitol supporter, who is still bitter that the Capitol has fallen, will tell their child the things done to its parents that its parents did in order to survive and keep their loved ones alive. He remembers though that this child will have so many people to tell it differently, to make sure this child knows love and that its parents loved so deeply they sacrificed themselves.

Katniss looks up at the man she loves more than any other. Cautiously she reaches her hand up to his face a caresses his cheek, looking into his eyes as if he is the only one in the world that exists. She never imagined her life would turn out this way. She isn't even sure if she will live to see the next day. All she knows is that she loves this man who is as broken and used as she is.

"Crack The Nut" is in full swing. Gale and Beetee had designed a fool proof plan. They would set off a series of explosions on the outer layer of the giant mountain fortress that will effectively close off all the exits but one. A compromise they made Katniss to maybe recruit and save lives instead of killing them all the way their fathers had died. The ten minutes from when the exits are closed off, before they send in a gas bomb to "Humanly" kill those left inside without destroying any supplies they would be able to pilfer, would allow any persons in The Nut to escape sending them straight out into the front line of Rebel soldiers. After ten minutes all other would be killed and the Rebel forces would take over The Nut effectively giving them the upper hand in the war.

Katniss has other plans though, she almost always does. She wants to reason with those who make it out. She wants to recruit them to fight with her. She doesn't really believe they want to follow the Capitol and send their own kids into the arena each year, she pities them. Unlike most of the other districts that only seemed to barely tolerate the Capitol's rule, Districts One and Two seem to throw their pride out the window to make sure their lives are rewarded. The other districts are often punished and neglected for their open coldness to the Capitol. This leaves Katniss sneaking into the front line to hopefully keep the number of deaths down.

With all of the confusion and chaos that ensues after The Nut is closed off, nobody really notices the small girl's absence. She looks at the young man coming out of the opening; he must only be in his late twenties, close to Finn's age she thinks. She wonders if he has a family, a wife, a child on the way too and this only spurs her on more in her mission to end the useless bloodshed. "Please." She says as she sees him holding a gun, pointing it towards her. "You don't have to do this. Join us. Freedom…don't you want freedom? To live where you don't have to fear your children being taken away from you?" She pleads with the man, hoping against all hope that he sees reason. He doesn't. He sees a pathetic girl who started a war, tearing his family and country apart, flipping his world upside down. He hates her. Her voice, each word that falls from her lips makes his hate for her grow. He shoots. Luckily for her, in his blinding hatred, he misses his mark. Pain is all she feels as the wind is knocked out of her and she flies back towards the ground. She has no fear in this pain, it is almost a relief. Death would come as a relief for her. She smiles as she hits the ground taking all of the remaining breaths out of her lungs leaving her feeling light and empty.

Only when they see her get shot by a crazed man coming out of the open exit do they realize she isn't with them. Finnick and Gale rush to her. Gale shoots the culprit feeling justice has been served. When it comes to Katniss an eye for an eye isn't enough. It's more like a severed head for a paper cut. He holds off other shots as he continually picks off the others coming at them. Finnick picks Katniss up and they run to the incoming hovercraft that Haymitch sent the moment the bullet hit her shoulder. It isn't a fatal hit and with the amount of armor Cinna put in her new uniform she will most likely only have a very large bruise and a dislocated shoulder. She had fallen just from the sheer force of the bullet hitting her petite frame.

Boggs orders the rest of the squad to the hovercraft. He knows if he lets Katniss back to Thirteen without the rest of the squad Coin will ship her to the Capitol to hold as bait for Snow and blow the two up, eliminating any and every threat to her becoming the new president. The rest of the Rebel forces can finish the mission without them. Paylor is a great leader along with the other leaders from a few of the outer districts. They work seamlessly on their common goal. Boggs knows that their small "Celebrity" group won't be missed, even if their group is generally the most blood thirsty. Katniss is a rare thing. She is selective in her kills for the most part. She will kill anyone opposing them and harming innocent people in the war, but she also wants to try and save those she thinks may switch sides, may only be fighting for the Capitol because they have to. She is only bloodthirsty for vengeance, not for the actual kill.

Haymitch is screaming threats in any and everyone's earpieces. He is in full blown hysterics. He refuses to lose the girl who made life matter again, not just for himself, but for a nation. Katniss's eyes flutter with each berating threat that Haymitch spews to the others in their squad, mainly Boggs, Finnick, Johanna and Gale. They have been granted trust by Haymitch at Katniss's request. Finnick pulls her earpiece out so she is at least calm in her unconsciousness, but as soon as Katniss loses Haymitch's voice she starts to whimper. Finnick places it back in, but has the camera crew connect him with Haymitch.

"What do you want?" Haymitch snarls when he sees Finnick on the screen almost looking calm.

"Stop yelling in her ear, Hay. She wants your voice in her ear, but every screams causes her unrest. We get it. You're mad." Finnick tells the older man. He feels a little bitter that Katniss wants to keep hearing Haymitch's voice.

"Why aren't you more mad?" Haymitch accuses, but he has lowered his voice.

"Oh I am plenty mad!" He huffs. "You weren't the one to carry her. You aren't the one worrying not only about her, but the child she carries…MY child." Finnick rubs it in.

Haymitch lets out a sigh and rolls his eyes at the Finnick even though Finnick can't see him. Finnick is shaken up, Haymitch can see this, but he also sees that Katniss wanting to hear his voice while she unconscious is driving Finnick crazy. He smirks to himself. Katniss lies in Finnick's lap, Finnick running his hands through her hair, looking at her with hurt, and the pain is visible in his eyes. "Look Fish Boy. I know you have more to lose with her, but she is all I have also. Just get back here, let's get her checked out and healed up and you two can go back to doing whatever you two do." Haymitch closes off the communication. For the first time in days he goes back to his room and cries for the girl who has turned his world on its head.

When they get back to Thirteen, Katniss, Johanna and Peeta are taken to the hospital. Prim and Mrs. Everdeen are there to admit them. Finnick insists that Katniss and Johanna share a room and at Annie's begging, also Peeta. Three of them shouldn't be allowed to stay in the same room, but they make an exception. Johanna had been banged up pretty good by the end of a rifle when it was thrown at her head. Brutus had seen and grabbed her up as he ran towards the hovercraft with the rest of the group. Peeta had taken a bullet to the leg as he was getting on the hovercraft.

Finnick insisted on the arrangement, because he didn't want Katniss to ever be left alone, allowing unwanted visitors. They could always ask any other visitors in the room to leave, but they wouldn't be able to force other patients out. Katniss had regained consciousness shortly after being admitted. She smiled up at him, a small smile. She held his hand as the doctors and nurses busied themselves around her.

Mrs. Everdeen pulls Finnick out of the room once Katniss is comfortably asleep with Haymitch staying guard by her bed. The three patients all in a dreamless morphling sleep. Peeta's dad and brother also keeping watch. Annie had to leave, the stress getting to her. Seeing Peeta and her Katniss lying there looking so pale and helpless set off an ever decreasing episode. She has been doing much better being separated from the Capitol's prying eyes and imposing thumb. Peeta and his pure and gentle nature have helped her heal mentally and she is slowly coming out of the fog that has ruled her life since her games ended. But seeing her friends hurt has sent her into another downward spiral. Fear emanating in her mind as it blows a none fatal wound into a death sentence. Like a child she can't always determine or see the difference.

"What are your intentions?" Mrs. Everdeen asks Finnick. She narrows her eyes and for the first time Finnick has ever seen her actually appear to be a mother.

"I am sorry, but you will need to be more clear." Finnick responds. He doesn't really like Mrs. Everdeen based on what Katniss has told him and what he has observed of her himself. He doesn't know how much he can trust her or her motives, even if the last conversation they had was one of a bridge being rebuilt. Her tone now is spiteful and accusing. He doesn't like. He wonders if she realizes she is shutting herself out of Katniss's life, not the other way around.

She looks at him like she is sizing him up. From everything she has heard about Finnick Odair, about his past and more recently about the truth, she isn't too sure about him either. She wonders how two such damaged people will be able to live normal lives. Much less raise a child. Even though she is grateful Finnick had helped her daughter, kept her going when she was in the Capitol, therefore insuring Prim and her own life, she still doesn't think he is the most appropriate choice for her daughter. She thinks Katniss should be with Gale. Yes, Gale who has known her daughter for forever, taken care of her family. Gale would be able to support a broken Katniss she thinks. "You and my daughter are having a child together, no?"

"We are." He answers coolly.

"Well then are you going to marry her or just leave her for the next hot thing to come along?" She spits accusingly. She doesn't know why she said it that way, but a part of her fears for her young daughter. She fears this man is only using her daughter and once this war is over and they are left to pick up the pieces of their broken lives he will bail, not being able to handle the magnitude of the stress they both carry.

He glares at her, heat rising from the pits of his stomach. "That is between us." He looks at her as if she were an ant and strides back into the room. He bends to Katniss and kisses her forehead gently before sitting in a chair on the other side of her, holding her hand. Katniss has the two men who refuse to give her up, one on each side, each holding onto her.

"What did Momma Everdeen want?" Haymitch scoffs.

"To insult me and know what my intentions are?" Finnick says resentfully. Haymitch raises his eyebrow in questioning. "I told her it was between Katniss and me after she insinuated I would ditch Katniss for the next hot thing." Haymitch nods his head in understanding for Finnick. He knows Mrs. Everdeen isn't quite on board yet, even if she does know the truth she still is having a hard time separating the truth from the lies that were ingrained in her.

Mrs. Everdeen watches the two men and her daughter. She knows the truth, but is resentful for the fact that they have Katniss's love and trust and she does not. She has been pushed out of her daughter's life. The daughter who has done everything to ensure her family survived. The daughter who painfully at times reminders her of her deceased husband. Prim comes up behind her mother. Noticing the directions of her stare and the slow tears trickling down her cheek. She gets it. She knows her mother is hurting. Prim is a better person than most, her forgiving nature lets her see the things in others that they themselves have a hard time admitting.

Prim walks into the room and silently moves around checking their vitals. She goes to Katniss last. "She is hurting…My mother." Prim says as if not talking to anyone. "She feels so much guilt and loneliness add to that the jealousy she feels towards you two and well like everyone she sometimes doesn't know how to move on."

"Jealous?" Haymitch inquires to the young girl who is proving to be wise beyond her years.

"She feels replaced as a mother…caretaker for Katniss. She failed at taking care of Katniss and both of you have done it." Prim nods as she says this.

"She chose not to care for Katniss." Finnick says gently, not wanting to upset the kind blonde.

"No…She couldn't. It hurt her too much when our father died and by the time she started to get better she saw so much of our father in Katniss that it was painful to even look at her some days and Katniss had already formed her grudge…" Prim starts to trail off.

"And we all know how easily Katniss gives up her grudges." Finnick quips. Prim and Haymitch try and fail to suppress the smiles and laughs coming up.

Prim leaves them all alone and goes out of the room leading her mother back to their room for the night. She knows what the others don't. She knows both Finnick and Haymitch love her sister more than life itself. She knows her mother is tormented by her inability to care for her elder daughter and her jealousy that two broken men can. But more than anything she knows her sister will do whatever it takes to make sure she is safe and cared for, even if it is sending herself to a most certain death and that scares her, but also makes her love her sister much more deeply than that of a sister. Prim may be forgiving but she is not blind or a fool. She knows her real mother, not the one who gave birth to her, but the one who cared for her in every way possible and fought for her with every last breath is Katniss. Prim loves her mother and has forgiven her for her abandonment, but loves her sister as her actual parent. Katniss was the one to sit with the girl when she would have nightmare, make sure she was fed, cleaned, had homework done and was happy. Her mother hadn't. Her mother, once she got better, taught her how to heal others and slowly started to show love and affection to her again, but never to the extent Katniss has. Katniss is who Prim runs to first when she is need of love.

President Snow is in a panic after seeing Katniss get shot. He is furious at himself for even feeling this way for a district girl, not even a higher district, but the lowest of the low. He can't help it though and he breaks. He has never met someone as selfless, strong willed, insightful and honest. Not to mention her beauty. She is the only one he feels is worthy of himself. Even if he doesn't know how to truly love and is sick and twisted in his affections. He calls Alma Coin to make a deal; Katniss, his money and immunity to leave Panem. Really he feels he is getting the better end of the deal. This rebellion has sent the whole country into a tailspin. She will almost have to rebuild the whole place. Not only that, but he knows she is just as sick and controlling as he and the people will see through it quickly allowing for another rebellion to follow shortly, hopefully obliterating the whole damn place. Snow smiles wickedly as he thinks about the mess he is willingly leaving the country in. He knows it will be in ruins soon just as the former civilization that had inhabited it had left it. Yes, he is definitely getting the better deal he thinks, his grin growing.

"President Snow, what do I owe the misfortune?" Coin says callously.

"Ah, yes, Alma. I have a proposition for you…" Snow starts. "Katniss, my money, immunity and we are left alone outside of Panem never to be bothered again and you can have Panem."

Coin smiles at the idea. She gets rid of Katniss and Snow and gets the country without anymore resistance. But she opens her mouth cockily, "Why? Do you not mind your young lover's pregnant with another whore's child?"

Snow grimaces. "Take care of it. And we will have a deal. As to why…let's just say some things mean more to me."

"And how do I get her to you without her watch dogs noticing?" Coin inquires.

"That is your problem if you want the country." Snow says as he hangs up.

Alma Coin knows a good deal when she hears it. She trusts Snow not to go back on his word. He never has in the past. In fact, other than he is a ruthless, power hungry leader, he is one of the most honest people she has ever dealt with. She calls in Boggs.

"Yes, President Coin." Boggs says as he enters.

"I have a mission for you." She begins. She tells him of her conversation with Snow and tells him to make sure it happens as soon as the _girl_ is out of the hospital. There is no need to anger Snow and make him go back on his word with a banged up bride.

Boggs bows his head in submissiveness, "Of course right away President Coin." He lies.

Boggs refuses to hand Katniss over to Snow. Refuses to follow Coin's plan. Refuses to have the baby in the girl's womb killed. Immediately after leaving Coin's office he heads to talk to Haymitch. Haymitch is expecting him, a nasty sneer on his face. He has already sent out the tapes from Coin and Snow's conversation to Beetee to run them as propos.

"I am guessing by the look on your face you already know?" Boggs asks the man before him.

Haymitch nods his head, "Yes the tapes are being prepared to run for the citizens of Panem to see that both of their leaders are rotten."

"Call them off. Keep them safe. I have a plan that may take care of all of this." Boggs demands. Haymitch smiles a little at the fact that Katniss continually worms her way into even the hardest most devoted hearts, even the enemies.

"Okay. I'll hold them off for now…but this plan better be damn good or else we go with mine."

"We will go on a mission to the Capitol where I will supposedly be delivering Katniss and effectively killing off as Coin put it her watch dogs. This won't be happening of course. Coin will have to be there for the exchange of Katniss for the country. We move Katniss out of the way and kill both leaders. Then, because people will be in an outrage we play them your recordings of all of the scheming Coin has been doing." Boggs looks at Haymitch for an approval of the plan. Haymitch thinks for a while, trying to play out the scenarios in his mind, trying to make sure nothing happens to Katniss…or Finnick for that matter. He knows Katniss won't continue on without him after the war is over, she will be too broken.

Finally a small smile crosses his lips at the idea. "Okay, but it will have to be perfectly coordinated, no slip ups, no mistakes." Haymitch says firmly. Boggs nods his head in agreement and the two men shake on it.

Katniss is released from the hospital and Boggs has gotten the doctors to tell Coin she lost the baby. Katniss, Finnick, Haymitch and a few others mainly a doctor and Prim, still know the truth. Katniss has to have physical therapy to bring her shoulder back to its original range of motion. The bruising takes a long time to heal, but it is nothing compared to the pain she has been in before.

When she visits Cinna she thanks him over and over again for designing the suit so well that she was protected. She tells him how lucky she is to only have a bruise and that it is all thanks to him. He smiles at her fondly when she continues her incessant praise of his abilities.

"I am just so sorry you lost the baby." Cinna tells her sorely. He feels bad that even though she walked away with a bruise she still lost the baby and doesn't understand why she does not seem more distraught over losing it.

She looks at him confusedly for the briefest of seconds before remembering she is no longer supposed to be pregnant. She doesn't understand why the man making clothes for her is left out of the loop, but follows Haymitch's advice as usual. She looks down sadly at her womb and gently holds it as if mourning the loss. "Oh yes, but maybe it is for the best. I am so young and the war in all." She tries to sound distraught like she thinks a grieving mother would, but it's hard when she knows the truth. Plus, she really hates lying to Cinna. He is one of the few people she trusts implicitly.

He picks up on the signs she is trying so very hard to cover up and his lip twitches up ever so slightly as he realizes this is something that is being covered up. Living confined underground makes news, even classified news, travel fast. He, along with most people in Thirteen, knows of Coin's contempt for the girl. He will keep his mouth shut. He finds it funny how the outsiders of Thirteen have a better handle on communication and are much better at keeping classified information classified.

Katniss runs into her mother in the hall alone. Finnick had told her of his conversation with both her mother and Prim. She is angry that her mother would say that to him.

"Hello Katniss. How are you?" Her mother asks looking at her with pity as she has heard of her daughter's misfortune.

"Fine mother." Katniss says shortly. She hates the look of pity and if her mother really knew her she wouldn't dare give it to her.

"Can we please start over? I mean…I know I don't deserve it, but I would like to know you…to be part of your life." Mrs. Everdeen says carefully choosing the words as to not set off Katniss.

"Not if you keep treating Finnick and Haymitch as if they are scum. They are better to me than you ever were and you treat them with such disdain." She glowers at her mother.

"I just don't want to see you hurt…when all of this is over." Her mother retorts.

"You don't want to see me hurt!" Katniss seethes. "Where were you when Prim and I were hurting far more…starving? Where were you when I was hunting illegally to make sure we had everything we needed? Where were you when I was being tortured and raped? And you are now all of a sudden worried that two men who love me beyond my comprehension are going to hurt me?" Katniss shakes with anger. Her mother cries at the truthful yet painful words. Katniss storms off down the hall, unable to feel any compassion for the woman who gave birth to her.

Katniss is still fuming when she runs into Haymitch heading to his room. She grabs him and pulls him in the room. He is shocked be her sudden rage and gives her a quizzical look. She shakes her head and presses her lips to his. She doesn't want to talk. She wants to appreciate the love he gives her. He succumbs to her for a few minutes then realizes what she is doing. He pulls her back away from himself, holding her out by her shoulders. She looks hurt by his rejection.

"Stop, Sweetheart. What is going on? What about Finn?" He asks. He may want Katniss to be his, but he doesn't want to hurt Finnick. He loves Finnick like family and he knows Finnick would be distraught over this. He would understand, but he would be hurting.

"What's going on is I want to thank you for loving me and you are pushing me away." She says scathingly.

"Why though? What brought this on? You don't normally attack me in the hall and drag me to my room like a caveman…or woman in your case." He smirks.

"Nevermind!" she growls lowly. He knows he won't be getting an answer and she is doing this to get out of having to actually talk about and deal with her feelings. She quickly turns on her heals and marches out of the room.

She needs to find a release. She goes to her room to talk Johanna into fighting. When she opens the door she gets a surprise. She sees Gale and Johanna going at it. They are rough and fueled, releasing the pint up frustrations they both feel. She stands in the door, leaning against it, arms crossed over her chest smirking. She is happy Gale finally took her advice and went for Jo. She knew if he liked her and her closed off crazy ways Johanna wouldn't be a far leap.

She waits there for a few more minutes as she sees Gale is coming to his end. Once he finishes and falls over turning to his side he gets a mortified look on his face. Johanna has a satisfied taunting smile on hers as she looks at her friend. "So Jo now that Gale is spent do you maybe want to go fight since Hay wouldn't fuck me?" Katniss asks the smirk and amused look never wavering from her face. Gale on the other hand is mortified and scrambling to get dressed and scurry from the room. His face is tomato red and he can't look her in the face. Gale feels shame like he betrayed Katniss. He doesn't understand how she can be so unfazed by it, even joking.

Johanna shrugs as she gets dressed and they go to Chaff's room to get drink before heading to the training area to fight. Johanna knows that the baby being dead is a lie and avoids Katniss's midsection. Just as Katniss and Johanna are in the middle of fighting Finnick comes barreling in to stop the fighting. Haymitch found him and explained the situation with Katniss. He pulls Katniss away from Johanna and carries her away and down to their room. When they get down he looks mad and for the first time it is directed at Katniss.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He growls at her holding her down on the bed, his face in hers. For the first time Katniss sees the killer that Finnick became in his games. It scares her. "So if I'm not around for you immediate use you will go find the next warm body to either fuck or fight?" He is so fueled by his anger that he is raging just like she is. There is a sheen of sweat on him causing his hair to stick to his face. His ocean green eyes are dark and murky like turbulent seas and his muscles are tight with rage. She is in a very similar condition, but her stormy gray eyes are wrought with guilt.

"No. I just didn't know what to do. I was wrong to go to Hay…and Jo." She concedes and he knows this is as good as an apology he will get from her. He looks her in the eye and they nod their heads in unison before he rips her clothes off.

"Don't ever fucking let me catch you fighting Jo again either…we have other priorities now." He snarls and she rips his clothes off and goes down on him. They don't realize time passes as they fall into each other and eventually the anger and hurt melt away bending into love.


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it!

Please review; it helps motivate me to continue some when I am having a hard time motivating myself to write.

***Finnick and Prim will live***

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 16

Katniss listens to Boggs and Haymitch explain the plan once more. She hopes it works, but has some serious concerns. She wonders how Boggs got Coin to agree to this plan. Either the woman is incredibly gullible or she is just that anxious to get rid of Snow and herself that she will believe and do anything to get it done.

It really is a theatrical plan, the handing off of the selfless Mockingjay to the evil President Snow. The Mockingjay, in essence giving up her life to Snow in order for the war to end and for peace and prosperity to be brought to Panem by President Coin. Yes, only a self-righteous control freak would find this plan to work. Katniss along with the rest of the group knew this would blow up in Coin's face. The people of Panem would go into an uproar that Katniss had been used by the powers that be yet again. Katniss really and truly believes Coin is an idiot if she can't see this, but who is she to argue? If Coin is willingly going to go along with this cock-n-bull plan that will get rid of Snow and Coin without either knowing, Katniss would go along with it too.

Boggs has been working tirelessly to make sure this mission goes off without a hitch. He and Haymitch spend hours and hours a day holed up making sure they cover any and every possibility that something or someone could blow up in their face. Their first and top priority is making sure Katniss is safe, next Finnick and Prim. They both know if either of those two should end up in a box Katniss will follow shortly after. She has lived her whole life protecting Prim and surviving just so Prim will survive, she will go insane if something were to ever happen to the cheerful blonde Everdeen. Finnick has been Katniss's life line the past two years. He has loved her, cared for her, protected her and given her an understanding and outlet that no one else could have. She won't know how to pick up the pieces on her own and even though Haymitch could help her, he doesn't really know how to help her deal with all of the things she has had to go through, unless it is to drown herself in alcohol like he does, but that wouldn't be too good for the baby.

Katniss looks at all of the people in the meeting with her; Boggs, Haymitch, Finnick, Gale, Peeta, Johanna, Cashmere, Brutus, Gloss, Chaff, and Beetee. She loves all these people and knows they are all supposed to lay down there lives for her. It infuriates her that they think so little of their own lives that hers is any more important than their own. It also touches her so deeply that someone cares for her. She has for so long been the one to care for others and never getting the care she so desperately needed but never would let anyone know. As she sits and listens to the plan again tears start to fall from her eyes without her permission. _It must be the hormones,_ she thinks to herself. She can't explain all of the weight on her shoulders, the deep affection and worry she feels for all of the people in the room, Prim, Annie and her and Finnick's baby. It is all crushing down her and she feels like she is coal under pressure, strong but ready to crack.

Finnick notices the silent tears falling down her face and his heart breaks a little as he knows how she feels. He knows she is nervous, scared and just a little touched that all of these people are going to such lengths to have her back. _Must be the hormones,_ he thinks to himself letting an imperceptible smile come on his face. He doesn't say anything or let her know he has noticed but places his hand nonchalantly on her shaking leg, just to let her know he is with her. He doesn't risk looking at her; he knows she will be embarrassed enough that the tears are falling.

"Okay so when we get to the Capitol, each of you in your groups will get 'killed off' and make your way to the city center making sure to blend in as much as possible to the others in the city. I will lead Katniss to the city center to have her there for the exchange. Coin and Snow will be on the front steps of his mansion signing the papers of surrender. Katniss will load her bow and shoot her arrow at Snow then quickly reload to shoot Coin. If for some reason she is unable, the rest of you move forward quickly and kill both presidents. Once Coin and Snow are down, build a fortress around Katniss. Both sides will want to take her hostage so we have to make sure she is covered. If not the tortures she will endure are going to be far worse. Beetee will play the tapes of the two presidents' negotiations on Katniss and the other ones of Coin plotting to end Katniss's life. Haymitch and Chaff will be making sure all of the rest of our group, including Katniss's mother and sister and all of the rest of the District Twelve and Four refugees will be taken back to Twelve to hide out until the smoke clears. Once they are secure they will come to the Capitol. Any questions?" Boggs asks as he finished going over the plan for the umpteenth time.

"No." The group answers in unison. They had all already argued over every scenario and found this to be the best option for insuring Katniss's safety.

Katniss gets up and silently moves from the room dried salty tear stains streak her face. She finds a hall closet and lets it all out. All of the pain, fears and anger. All of the hopes and dreams that may fade into oblivion if this goes wrong. Sometimes she wonders if it would be better for everyone else if she did just agree to go with Snow. That is a stupid thought though because she knows Coin will be just as miserable and evil of leader.

"What was that about?" asks Johanna. She is perplexed by the sudden emotions that Katniss is displaying. She hasn't really seen the girl seem so helpless, even when her mind seems to disappear and her eyes go dead she doesn't seem so heartbreaking. Even in Katniss's weakest moments she still seemed like she was hiding her emotions. "Finnick? Haymitch?" She questions the two expecting an answer. They both shake their heads. Neither of them have seen this either. She was calm and excepting. There were tears, but no cries. She didn't seem angry or hurt. She wasn't shutting down like she does when she can't take it anymore; she was just crying silent tears. They didn't know what to think about it anymore than Johanna.

"I may have a thought." Peeta starts hesitantly. They all look at him incredulously. "When she was sitting under my tree back in Twelve when we were eleven and she had just been digging through my trash and my mother had threatened to call the peacekeepers on her….well she sat and cried silently in the rain. Maybe she is scared. Not scared for herself of course but for letting anyone down. I know she wasn't scared she would die of starvation soon, but scared and ashamed that she let Prim down…She couldn't save her. Maybe it's something similar to that?" Peeta finishes slightly unsure if he is right, but it's the best guess he can come up with.

"Peeta may be on to something. She would always become real quiet, even more than normal, when she couldn't shoot or catch anything when we would hunt. It happened a few times when we first met before we started to really be partners. She would sometimes look so disgusted with herself and I figured it was like how I would feel." Gale adds. He knew she wouldn't take well to not bringing home food for Prim, she felt like she failed whenever she came home empty handed. "She never once cared if she went hungry, but if she had nothing even for Prim she would become overwhelmingly quiet."

Haymitch and Finnick nod in understanding. They knew all of these things; Katniss had shared some of it with them. The rest of the people in the room had a horrified look in their faces. "You mean when she said she was starving, it was actually starving…not like I eat a little or once in a while?" Cashmere asks horrified that someone wouldn't have even a little food each day. She grew up in District One so she didn't know what it really meant to be without.

"There were times Katniss and I would go days with out real food, especially during the winter. We would give all of our food to our families and we would chew on mint leaves and drink warm water. My mother made me eat some most of the time, but Katniss was the parent solely…her mother never made her care about herself." Gale says so sadly it breaks their hearts. "There were times I would fear for her life. She would be so skinny, but she refused to be pitied…her pride would have killed her if she hadn't feared what it would do to Prim if she left this world."

They all turn their heads towards where Katniss walked out, all of them with a new sense of respect, even more than before, for the girl. None of them could say they would be able to live and continue to survive if they had to live what she has.

Katniss slowly gets up and leaves the closet after hours of tears falling. She doesn't necessarily remember coming into the closet, but is grateful for the hours of seclusion. She wouldn't have been able to get it all out if someone had come after her. She makes her way to dinner and sees everyone sitting at the usual table. Finnick sees her in line for food and gets up to go be with her while she is in line. He puts his arms around her from behind and bends into her ear, "I missed you today."

She turns her head up and looks at him, a small smile coming across her lips. "Thanks." She says. She knew he was giving her space today, she needed it.

They sit with the rest of the group; there is a deeper respect for the youngest one among them deep in their eyes. No one says anything about the new revelations they learned earlier today. They had a wonderful meal together, all of them, as a family. It is to be their last super and each one wanted to freeze time in its place and live this moment over and over again. None of them worried about being sold or mentoring or the safety of their loved ones at the minute. Tomorrow they would be heading out to protect the girl who won't live for or protect herself.

After dinner they all head off to their rooms. None of them want to drink or stay up, they want to just rest. They know the next few days are going to be hell. Johanna, who has been growing closer with Gale, even if she won't admit it's more than sex, goes to Gale's room. Katniss, Finnick and Haymitch go to her room. They push Johanna and Katniss's beds together and all three take turns showering then climb into bed just as they have done so many times in the past. Katniss falls asleep quickly. Her cry had tired her out and the impending doom looming over her head has been physically exhausting for her, take into account she is pregnant and it's no wonder she hadn't already fallen asleep. Haymitch and Finnick lie awake. Both of them facing the girl in between them.

"We have to make it through this Hay….You, me and them." Finnick says as his eyes drift to Katniss.

"That's the plan…I will do everything in my power to make sure it happens." Haymitch replies.

The next morning before they get on to the hovercraft Coin calls Katniss into a last minute meeting. The older woman looks down on the younger one; both have their eyes in a dead lock with each other, neither one wanting to submit power. Finally Coin speaks, "Now I know you have trouble following orders and Boggs has reassured me you are getting better at it. You must listen to everything he tells you to do…remember the fate of Panem rests on your shoulders." It doesn't take a genius to figure out what Coin wants from Katniss.

A small wry smile comes on Katniss's face. "I was already to planning to follow orders to a T." The younger woman says in her most manipulatively sweet voice. "Thank you for the advice. May I go now?"

"Yes. Of Course…remember though Panem's freedom rests on your shoulders." The older woman warns. Katniss nods as she turns to walk out the door.

At the hovercraft docking station family members are gathered to say goodbye. Katniss hugs Prim, The Hawthornes, Annie and the Odairs. She holds onto Prim and whispers in her ear, "Whatever Haymitch tells you to do, do it. No questions. Even if it goes against what mother or President Coin say. Promise me." Prim nods her head in agreement.

"Promise." She holds out her pinky to her sister to swear it. Katniss hooks her pinky to Prim's as tears threaten to come she pulls her sister back into another tight hug before she turns to Haymitch.

"Don't worry Sweetheart. Have I ever let you down before?" He asks trying to sound like his usual sarcastic self, but his worry shows through too much.

"There's always a first time for everything." Katniss says as she stands on her tiptoes and wraps her arms around him. She softly kisses his lips before she pulls back and smiles at him. "Like first real kisses. Keep them safe. Love you, you old drunkard." She starts to pull away but he hugs her tight into him.

"I love you too, you insufferable girl." He whispers in her ear, giving her one last kiss on the cheek.

Others would think Katniss and Haymitch's relationship would completely bother Finnick, but he looks on with a smile at the two people who could be one. He has always told them he wouldn't keep them apart and he knows that they are just saying goodbye incase they don't get the chance in old age, well Haymitch's old age.

Katniss runs over to Finnick when she let go of Haymitch and he quickly pulls her into himself as they walk to the hovercraft. She smiles up at him nervously and he gives her a reassuring one in return then kisses her lips gently before they enter. They turn one last time and wave bye to all of their families and friends.

It will take a day to reach the outskirts of the Capitol. No one wants to think about the mission at hand and most just lay back and relax until they land. Some sit in groups and mess around and some, like Gale, go over and over the plans to make sure there isn't some flaw that they didn't get before. Katniss and Finnick sit with Johanna, Peeta and Barley just talking. They regal Peeta and Barley on some of their crazier stories from their times spent in the Capitol. Johanna talks about her final "Date" and what went on there. Katniss talks about the man who only wanted to talk to her while she sat naked in front of him. Finnick talks about the woman who wanted him to dress up as a baby during his first year being sold. They laugh about the lavish "necessities" of the Capitol like the hundreds of different knobs and settings in the showers or the drinks that make you throw up your food when you can't eat anymore but want to. Barley listens in disbelief at the ways of the Capitol and how different they are from back home.

When they finally land in the Capitol they all let out a collective "here goes nothing" sigh and get into their assigned groups. Cashmere, Gloss and Brutus are group one; they will also be the first to "die". They leave the craft and make their way towards the city center and towards the already detonated pod that would be their "death". The pods are scary for them, they are unpredictable like landmines, but the group has been assured that the targeted ones have already gone off. There are still plenty though that may or may not have gone off and one wrong move can set them off.

The next group to leave is Gale, Peeta and Barley. Katniss hugs Gale tightly and makes him promise to be careful before kissing him on the cheek. She hugs Peeta and Barley too and wishes the group luck.

The final group, Mockingjay's group, is Boggs, Katniss, Finnick and Johanna. A pod is supposed to go off "killing" Johanna and Finnick before Boggs and Katniss reach the city center. Even though Katniss knows this is all being faked she can't help but feel sick at the thought of watching Finnick and Johanna die.

Everything is going fine until they hear the first pod go off and then another follows directly after from the direction that Brutus's group went. When no signal comes signifying they are okay, Katniss starts to lose hope. About an hour later they hear a third Pod go off from the direction of Gale's group, luckily they get the confirmation they are fine and that they have Brutus with them. No word yet on Cashmere and Gloss which starts to break her heart. Even though the brother sister due were not known as the most compassionate of victors they had become part of her family. And even a career victor is still a victor; they have to live with themselves and the games Snow plays after just like everyone else, the only difference is they volunteered for it to bring pride and glory to their districts.

Finally it comes time for their group to split off. The explosion rings and suddenly Katniss no longer sees Finnick and Johanna. She has to remind herself this has been planned they aren't dead, but tears start to fall out of her eyes and Boggs has to push her along. They receive the confirmation that they are okay and Katniss calms some, but the emotion of everything is becoming too great.

Seven hours after landing Katniss and Boggs reach the city center, the front steps of President Snow's mansion. Everything is set up the way it should be, but in the corner of her eye she recognizes an older woman with blonde hair and blue eyes. Frantically her eyes search to make sure Prim is no where in sight. She sees people are sectioned off and everything seems too calm. President Coin starts to make a speech about the significance of this day and Snow's surrender. She speaks of a new era and a final games to end all games using Capitol children. Most people in the crowd are horrified by the news and are outraged by the callousness of their new leader. Some people support the idea and think of it as payback, but most of the people in the crowd, rebels and Capitol people alike are against it. They realize that this won't solve any problems, only make things worse, create a bigger drift between the Capitol people and the District people. Besides that, most people in the District wouldn't want to watch it anyway; it would be a pointless exercise of power.

Katniss's fury boils up in her. No one, Capitol or not, should have to watch their children die. Her heart is pounding in her body. She can no longer hear anything but the loud, strong, beat of her heart going a mile a minute. Before she can register what she is doing an arrow is already loaded into her bow. She slowly pulls it back and aims. It hits her mark right on. Her bow is loaded again before the first makes contact and the second mark is aimed for and hit, only as an explosion goes off to her right, where the older blonde haired, blue eyed woman had been standing. She had been the cause of her own mother's death. What her mother had been doing there in the first place she wasn't sure. She was supposed to be in Twelve with Prim. Somehow she had made it to the Capitol and she died in an explosion just like her husband. The remaining members of the group surrounded Katniss as gun fire went off around them. Finnick picks Katniss up and runs with her to the waiting hovercraft, but they are stopped before they can board. She is taken into custody, ripped out of Finnick's arms. She has still yet realized what is going on. She repeats over and over the things she knows.

_I am Katniss Everdeen. I am eighteen years old. I am the victor of the 74th Hunger Games. I am pregnant with Finnick Odair's child. I was sold for a little over a year. I killed both Presidents and my mother. _

These are the things she knows for certain. She doesn't cry or scream. She tries to get her pill out of her shoulder pocket to end her life before they can torture her. She isn't even sure who _they_ are anymore. She has pissed off both sides. Just as she opens it, the pocket is ripped off of her uniform by a blonde haired blue eyed boy, Peeta Mellark. She screams out for Gale to shoot her but he refuses. She gives up and hangs her head low, hoping that Haymitch will have a back up plan for her.

She sees Finnick screaming and fighting to get to her. She sees Johanna, Boggs and Brutus trying to shoot at any and everybody to help her. It all fails and soon she is locked in her old room from her games in the training center. She sits there. No tears fall, but she has left herself again. She can't find a reason to let her mind be aware, she knows the horrible tortures she will endure and would rather not remember any of them.

She remembers her baby. Their baby. She can't quit until she is dead. She has to try for Finnick. But then the deaths she has been responsible for creep into her mind. Prim will never forgive her for killing their mother. The nation will forever hate her for killing both leaders. She and the baby will be pariahs. Maybe she will retreat within herself afterall.

Hours pass and no one has come into her room. She sits alone in an empty room. She won't go near the windows for fear that someone will see her and try to shoot her only to miss a death mark and she will die slowly, bleeding out from an otherwise none fatal wound. So she sits on the floor protected by the bed. She sits while her mind goes numb in a constant battle to stay and fight or flee and die anyway.

Haymitch and Beetee get the tapes up and are showing them on a continuous feed. They hope and pray that this will sway all of the people's minds. After a few days, Boggs is granted permission to watch the live feed of Katniss in her training room. He has been given the responsibility of being her silent caretaker. He sees she is a mental mess. There are trays of food all untouched and she is singing so low a song that was long ago forbidden, _The Hanging Tree_. She sings it over and over again, so softly. They are going to bring her to trial, but no one knows when or if it has started yet. The remaining heads of the Districts are keeping almost every decision under lock and key. He demands that someone she knows be allowed to visit her, to get her to eat for the baby. He is denied. He brings Haymitch into the observation room to watch the live feed. Finnick wouldn't be able to handle seeing Katniss like this, but even though it will break Haymitch's heart he will be able to understand her, to give him some way to help the girl.

"Why isn't she eating? Doesn't she want to keep the baby alive?" Boggs asks, trying to get answers.

"She isn't there." Haymitch says flatly. Boggs can tell this man is breaking watching his life slip away from him. Katniss and Haymitch have a different sort of love; that of a mentor, a soul mate, and a lover. It goes much deeper than most think and Haymitch watching the girl who made his life matter die is slowly and painfully killing him.

"What can I do? I have been denied letting anyone visit her to get her to eat." Boggs pushes, wanting more than anything to preserve her life. That is what he has been fighting for since he met her.

"Can she receive notes? Or special food orders?" Haymitch asks. This peeks Boggs's interest. He makes a call down to the offices of the heads of the districts.

"Yes. What do you want to send her?" Boggs answers him after a good while of haggling.

"Send her any food that will remind her of babies; baby carrots, baby corn, milk, hell send her damn baby food. I don't care what it is but make sure it is baby centered!" Haymitch barks. "I'm going to be back with some letters from others for her." He walks out to find the people he thinks will penetrate her fog.

He gets Finnick to write down her favorite songs he sings her. He hopes maybe it will get her singing something else. He gets Gale to write about their woods and hunting. He even gets Prim to plead with her to hang on and tell her she isn't mad at her. He knew Katniss gave up hope because she thinks Prim will hate her forever for killing their mother, even though she really didn't. He even writes something down. He doesn't ask Cinna or any of the others to write one, it would only be a sick reminder of the Capitol, The Hunger Games and everything after. Despite the fact that he and Finnick are probably also reminders, they are also her life line in this world. They keep her tethered and strong. They know she doesn't see anything Capitol or rebellion when she looks at them.

The letters and food are delivered to Katniss's room. She still sits in the same spot never moving. She is filthy and dehydrated. She sits in her own mess as she can not seem to get out of it. She has lost all function and hope. She pushes the food away from her, but looks at the letters curiously. She doesn't open them, but smells them. Finnick's smell of the ocean and the sun. Prim's smell of healing herbs. Gale's smell of the woods. Haymitch's smell of alcohol and District Twelve. She sits there inhaling each one for hours. Finally she opens the first one, Finnick's. She starts singing the songs he has written down. While she sings she opens Gale's. He reminds her of their life together in the woods and how that is the only place she ever smiles. Prim's tells her how much she needs her. How she doesn't blame her and isn't upset or mad about their mother, but that she would die if Katniss doesn't come back to her. That she has to fight this one more battle and she will be able to be free with her. Katniss continues to sing. It isn't until she reads what Haymitch wrote does the fire come back.

_Don't let THEM win Sweetheart. Love Hay. _

She inhales her food. Shaking. Mind slowly coming back into focus. She remembers all the events that led up to where she is sitting now in her own filth. She gets up and strips herself of her clothes. She has a very small curve in her lower abdomen and Boggs has to look away as the girl finishes her food naked and makes her way to the shower. Haymitch just smiles. She is not Katniss Everdeen, but she is back in her own mind. It may be feral and full of carnage, but she is fighting again. She showers and wraps the towel around her as she sits on the bed, no longer scared or focused on someone seeing her. She sings the songs Finnick sent her and her own from home, but _The Hanging Tree_ is still on her continual play list. Boggs doesn't get it. It sounds sick and depressing, but Haymitch gets it. It is the final release from the hold of the Capitol. It is her choosing to go out in a blazing glory for her loved ones and she is telling them she will be waiting for them on the other side.

Days, weeks pass. She sings. She eats. Haymitch and Boggs watch. Finally news comes from the Heads of the Districts. They have elected a new President. President Paylor. Boggs and Haymitch are both pleased with this decision. President Paylor has order a pardon for Katniss with the instructions she is to remain in District Twelve until she reaches the age of twenty. Two years.

The remaining victors stayed in the Capitol until they had news on Katniss. They stayed in their old rooms, never even guessing Katniss was in her old room being held prisoner. Before she could be released and anyone could see her, they had doctors come to make sure both her and the baby were healthy. Katniss is severely underweight, but the baby seems to be developing fine, a little small but it should be fine. Haymitch, who has been granted guardianship over Katniss and her sister, is the only one allowed to be with her before she is released. Haymitch fought for it, but there really wasn't anyone to go against him and for the most part seemed the most logical person.

Finnick has been going out of his mind. He sits with Johanna tying knots in a length of rope, not knowing if Katniss and his baby are okay. He begs Haymitch for information, but Haymitch chooses to keep it from him. Not to be mean, but to protect him. It's not until the night before she is to be released does he tell Finnick of her condition. When he had commissioned the letters for her, he had said just to boost her moral, never mentioning her in her own refuse or her constant singing or her refusal to eat.

"Finn, sit down. We need to talk about Katniss." Haymitch commands. Finnick who has been eagerly awaiting any news, good, bad or indifferent, readily complies. "Katniss is going to need a lot of support when she gets out. Who knows how she will handle being 'free' or living with all that she has done." Haymitch sighs, looks down and shakes his head, his dark hair falling in front of his face. Finnick reaches his hand toward the older man.

"What is it Haymitch?" He asks sternly, knowing Haymitch has been keeping information. "She didn't hurt herself did she?"

Haymitch looks up and pushes the hair away from his face before he begins again. "When Boggs finally was able to get me access to see her through the surveillance….it wasn't pretty Finn. She had not moved from her spot on the floor, hiding behind her bed. She was covered in her own mess….there was untouched food from days left around her. She's lost more weight. She would just continually sing the hanging tree song….her eyes were vacant." Haymitch stops to look at Finnick to see how he is taking it. Finnick has tears in his eyes as he fervently ties and unties his rope in his hands. "It wasn't until I got the letters in did she show any form of life again. But she became a raging fire. The intensity in her eyes, the will to live, became so fierce. She ate, showered then sat on her bed singing. She hasn't said anything, but hums….a lot. She is really underweight; the baby is small but healthy. Everything will be okay as long as we can keep her eating and the doctors say a strict routine will be the best thing for her once she is back in Twelve. As you know, I am her guardian now, but that just means I will be making sure she and Prim are alive." He looks up again, "Finn, are you sure you can take on all this responsibility?" He finishes. He knows Finnick is strong, but he has a world of baggage all on his own. Maybe between the two of them they can save her.

Finnick looks up abruptly stopping his knot making. "Yes." His words are short, but his determined sea green eyes say everything Haymitch needs to know. They say that he will walk through fire and ice and go to the deepest depths of Hell to make sure she is okay.

"Okay then. Tomorrow, Katniss will be dismissed. I have Cinna going in to make sure she is camera ready and also maybe ease her into people. As soon as he is done, you and I will go to collect her and take her to the hovercraft. I'll come get you when the time is ready." Haymitch looks at Finnick who has gone back to tying knots. Finnick nods his head in understanding, but is too angry at the world, at Haymitch, at everyone to say anything.

Finnick thinks about the girl who won the seventy-fourth Hunger Games. He thinks about all she has been through. He thinks about all he has been through. He prays with each knot that they will be able to heal together. It will be a long hard process, but he will make her happy and want to live again. He is determined to bring her to life, not for him or her really, but for the little flower growing inside of the woman he loves. For the first time since Katniss was taken prisoner he slept. He had no nightmares, but dreamt of a little girl with her midnight hair and his sea green eyes, with her fierceness and his sense of humor and hope. He dreams of a little girl who will know complete freedom and a worry free childhood, who can swim and hunt. He dreams of holding a dark haired beauty with powerful gray eyes as they watch the perfect mix of them play. He knows life will get better, it will be a hard road but it will get better, it has to for that perfect child in his dreams.

Please Review! Thanks so much!


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it! Sorry for the longer waits, too much to do in a short amount of time.

Please review; it helps motivate me to continue some when I am having a hard time motivating myself to write.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 17

Haymitch sits with Katniss in her room in the training center waiting for Cinna to arrive to make her publicly acceptable. She hasn't spoken, not to the doctors, not to Haymitch. Haymitch asked and answered all the questions during the doctor's visit once they realized Katniss would not be verbally cooperating. Haymitch, getting tired of the silence and just wanting to hear her voice, speaks up. "Sweetheart, Cinna will be here in a few minutes to get you ready to leave. Don't you want to start talking so he doesn't get his feelings hurt?" He tries to be gentle and patient but there is a sarcastic edge in his voice that clearly states he is almost to his limit.

Katniss laughs bitterly. This is the first sound other than her mindless singing and humming he has heard from her in weeks, almost two months. She glances in his direction, bitterness in her fiery eyes, scanning him, glaring at him. "Why should I care whose feelings I hurt? Nobody cares about my feeling." Her voice is hoarse from disuse. Haymitch looks back at her with a seriously confused look on his face. He cannot fathom why she doesn't care about hurting Cinna's feelings. Cinna was one of her favorite people. She shakes her head and laughs again. "This" She starts waving her arms around and pointing to herself, "is all of your faults. It's the Capitol's fault for having the games, your fault for keeping me alive, Cinna's fault for making people want me, President Snow's fault for selling me and then worse falling for me, the people of the Capitol's fault for wanting me, Gale's fault for not forcing me to run away before my games, Coin's fault for being power hungry. It's my fault for living, my mother's fault for never being there for me….God my mother….I k-killed her!" She sobs out the part about her mother. No tears but a gasping shortness of breath. As if just saying it is breaking her now hollow heart. After a moment of silence she looks at him dead in the eyes. "I should have died in my games." She tells him seriously, not raising her voice. She sounds detached. She shakes her head and chuckles darkly again. "Yes, fine I will be pleasant…let Cinna dress me up one more time for my audience…when I get home don't be too surprised to see me under the hanging tree."

Losing her mother is ripping her apart inside. Katniss may not have had any real relationship or respect for her mother, but she was still her mother and deep down, even lower down than she realized, she hoped they would reconcile one day. Now though, the chance is gone and she is to blame. She shot the arrows at the two Presidents and now her mother is dead. Her worst fear in all of this is Prim's rejections when she sees her again. She doesn't understand how or if Prim will forgive her, she, after all, did love their mother.

On top of the weight of killing her own mother, Katniss has the weight of the deaths of all of those barricaded in with her that died. She has Gloss and Cashmere's deaths on her head, Mags and Darius, countless tributes from her games and the death of Rove, plus all of the people who didn't make it out of the bombing in District Twelve and of course all of those in the war. She feels like she is at fault for all of this, never realizing this has been a long time coming, never realizing that she couldn't control or change any of it. She feels the price of each person's life, the amount growing to a number she just can't afford.

Haymitch looks at her appalled by the words coming from her mouth. He knew she would be bitter, knew she is mad and hurt, but never did he think she wanted to end it all. She sees the look of total terror that is screaming from his eyes. "You told me not to let them win, they won't…I will die on my own terms…not in some makeshift prison cell for their precious Mockingjay." She says in disgust. For the first time in a long time Haymitch completely loses it. Hot angry, sad tears fall from his face as he gets up and starts pacing in front of his damaged victor. He turns on her getting right in her face, she doesn't even flinch or back up, just sits there disconnected from the reality that one of the men she loves is losing it.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He bellows. "Yes, life sucks….and for you it may suck more than most, but you are alive. You are having a baby with the man you love…who you choose to love. And you want to…to hang yourself. You may be sicker in the head than I thought." His eyes boring into hers. At the mention of her baby her eyes waver slightly and she defensively places a hand over her small belly. "If I ever hear you say that again…or see you try to end it all….I swear to Christ, Katniss, I will lock you up in a padded room for all eternity!" he snarls at her.

She shakes visibly at the thought of being locked up anymore. He knows he has broken down some barrier. She nods her head at him in understanding and he kisses her on top of the head. His tears dampening her hair. She reaches around him and pulls him towards her into an embrace. This is the first real contact she has had with people. She inhales his sent which is notably missing some of his normal alcohol smell. "Did you stop drinking?" She asks.

He pulls back and laughs, a real smile coming to his face. "You know I always cut back when you're in trouble." He smirks at her. She smiles back and for a short minute they stare at each other, knowing that somehow they will fix her, even if she thinks it is impossible and is ready to give up on herself. She knows Haymitch is always in her corner willing her to live.

Katniss is nervous about seeing Cinna. Although she does love him dearly and he has been one of her closet friends, she can't help but directly associate him with being sold. He was of course making the package desirable, has been since the day they first met. Making people want to buy her.

A light knock on the door startles the two victors. Haymitch gives her one final look of reassurance and also warning telling her to be on her best behavior. He opens the door to Cinna and steps to the side so he may enter. Katniss doesn't make a move to him, but looks at him with vacant eyes, trying so hard to suppress the rage and fear building. The thought of dressing up for the people makes her violently sick. She runs to the bathroom pushing past them to throw up. Cinna glances at Haymitch warily. Haymitch shakes his head somberly in response and follows Katniss into the bathroom. He bends to the girl and holds her hair away from her face and rubs her back. Cinna stands in the doorway looking helplessly on. "Sweetheart? Are you sick? Do I need to call the doctor back?" Haymitch asks caringly. He knows she is dying on the inside. He knows she doesn't want to play dress-up anymore. It's been slowly killing her from the inside out.

When she finishes she sits back and he gently cleans her face and gives her some water to rinse her mouth out with. When he is done he just holds her for a while, while Cinna watches on. He smoothes her hair and tells her everything will be okay, that she is strong enough for this. Just one more show that's all and then she can hide away for a while. She looks up at him pleadingly, "Please Hay. No more. I don't want to be their doll anymore….pl-please." She sobs. Haymitch gives Cinna an apologetic look. Cinna shakes his head to tell him not to be. Finally she stops crying and looks up at Cinna. Her eyes are dead again and her body has become rigid. "I'm ready. One more time for my people." She says bitterly sarcastic. Haymitch snorts at the comment and helps her up. Cinna turns on the shower and sets the settings so she will look brand new when she comes out.

Cinna looks at her. This is not the girl who he first met. Not the girl who volunteered for her sister. He had been right all along when he knew if she ever escaped she would resent him. He had told himself this over and over again in his head to prepare himself for the rejection, but he never expected she would be so damaged or that it would feel like someone is trying to kill him slowly. He feels like his chest has been cut open and someone has stuck their hand inside and is squeezing his heart so hard that it would explode with the pressure.

From the moment he saw her on the stage at her reaping she had an aura of fiery golden light surrounding her and he knew what he wanted to do for her costume, because if anyone deserved to live it is her. He hadn't even seen the boy tribute he was so consumed with design ideas for her. He remembers first meeting her. She was obviously put off by the prep team and skeptical about what he would be like. Once she realized he wasn't as abrasive and frivolous as the rest of the Capitol people she started to let her guard down some. He learned a lot about her from Haymitch. Apparently, he had been keeping tabs on this particular girl for some time. Haymitch never knew anything about his tributes, but her he talked about. Once he lit her on fire on the chariot he knew the people would see what he saw shining around her on the reaping. She was a protector and a fighter.

Now she is ashes blowing in the wind. All she sees is death, all she knows is destruction. She has had too much thrust upon her and he sees that she is dying and he blames himself, he helped extinguish the girl on fire.

When she steps out of the shower and he goes to dry her off as he has done a thousand times before, she backs away like a scared, wild animal. He slowly moves for her again, but she shrieks when he touches her with the towel. Tears start to brim in his eyes as Haymitch comes in. He keeps his head down while handing the towel to Haymitch and excusing himself from the bathroom. She is scared of him. Haymitch gives him another apologetic glance before shutting the door.

Haymitch hands her the towel. She is cold, wet and shaking uncontrollably. She takes it and dries herself off while Haymitch looks at her sternly. "Why did you shriek?" He finally asks. She looks up at him begging him not to make her say it. He shakes his head "no" letting her know she will not get away from this. She sighs in defeat.

"I can't….I-I just can't. I don't want to be touched by anyone." She says shakily, her eyes on the ground in front of her. Haymitch gives her a curious look.

"You let me touch you?" He questions more than states.

"You're different." Is the only explanation she gives for her selectiveness. He sighs also in defeat as they will have some problems ahead if she is only allowing him to touch her. Surely Finnick will be upset or more like hurt just like Cinna.

"Okay Sweetheart. Are you dry enough? Will you let Cinna at least dress you and do your hair and make-up?"

"Do I have a choice?" She asks sarcastically. He shakes his head "no" and she sighs. "Will you stay with me?" She asks. And he nods before turning to let Cinna back in.

Cinna works quickly and does his best not to touch her too much or too long. He can see she is rigid with nerves and that this is stressing her out probably more than the thought of being bombarded by the press and people waiting for her to exit the building.

Finally he is done and tells her to look in the mirror. She is in a soft gray dress. It is modest and reminiscent of the style of dress she wore on her reaping day. She has on gray flats to match and he has done her hair in a braid over her left shoulder. He only added a little make-up to give her face some color and even look. He put on a soft natural pink gloss to make her look like she is alive again. She is gorgeous and looks like herself.

She looks at Cinna for the first time with her eyes showing anything but death. They are soft and she looks like she could cry. Through the dress you can see the small tell-tale sign she is pregnant. She looks at herself sideways and places her hands comfortingly over her tiny bump as tears start glistening in her gray eyes. "Thank you….it-it's beautiful….I look like….like me." She whispers.

He nods at her tears threatening to spill over. Before any of them know what is happening she hugs him tightly. Hesitantly, at first, he hugs her back, but the tighter and longer she holds the more bold he is. He kisses the side of her head and holds her almost as tightly as she holds onto him.

Haymitch places his hand on her shoulder and clears his throat. "Sweetheart, Can I leave you alone with Cinna so I can go get Finnick?" She nods her head, but doesn't loosen her grasp on Cinna. Haymitch just smiles sadly at the pair before heading to get Finnick.

Finnick had wanted to see what it was like for her in solitary confinement so he would be able to hopefully help her better, get a better understanding of what he is dealing with. He had stayed up all night and most of the morning watching hours and hours of surveillance of her. He obsessively tied knots with rope through most of it trying his best to hold it together. Seeing the girl who helped light the country on fire fade away into nothingness killed him a little more on the inside than he expected. As he waited for Haymitch to come collect him so they could all return to Twelve he thought about the girl he first saw.

**Flashback**

_I am sitting on the train with my hopeless tributes heading back to the Capitol. I hate going to the Capitol. It is always the same; train tributes in between 'dates'. I hate the dates more than anything in the world, even more than the Games themselves….and I hate those with every cell in my body. I have adapted though and understand if I want my family to be happy and alive I have to do what I have to do. Training tributes in Four is always a surprise. Some years we get volunteers, Career Tributes, and some years we get whatever is drawn. This is one of the latter years. The tributes this year are younger than a Career would be and the boy is especially young and scrawny. The girl is sixteen and looks to be in good shape, but the boy is fourteen and small. I was fourteen when I won my Games, but I had already looked more like a man. I didn't volunteer, but I definitely had practiced skills that would help me both in life in Four and in the arena. _

_After dinner Mags, the tributes, Vivinnia (our escort and royal pain in the ass) and I sit to watch the recaps. Everything is going as expected, District One and Two volunteer and the rest of the kids are reaped, pulled away from their families to die at the hands of twisted teenagers with a thirst for blood and the vindictive Capitol. It is sad when the District Ten boy is crippled and the monster and small child from Eleven are almost heartbreakingly ironic. It is District Twelve though, that captivates me. Effie pulls the girl's name out and a small blonde haired blue eyed girl hesitantly starts walking up to the stage. I am only guessing she is twelve, she looks younger though. They flash quickly to Haymitch to get his reaction on the tribute, but he has a look of dread. On first glance I think it is because she is so young, but he is looking off more in the distance, past the tribute. It isn't until I hear a girl yell out "NO! Prim No!" Do I realize what or should I say who he is looking at. I wonder how he knew this would happen. I mentally file it away to ask him later. "I volunteer. I volunteer as tribute!" She cries out standing in front of the young girl. I am shocked to say the least. Twelve never has volunteers, never. On top of that I can't understand why she would. The girls really look nothing alike. The older one, I would guess sixteen her eyes say older as in someone who has already lived a hard life, is olive skinned with dark hair and the most mesmerizing gray eyes I have ever seen. _

_The younger girl holds onto the older one screaming and crying for her not to do this. The older one forcefully tells her to let go, like a parent scolding a child. I can tell she is doing all she can to keep up her hard façade. A tall boy comes out and takes the screaming younger girl in his arms and bends into the older one before she walks on the stage. "Katniss Everdeen." She says her name. She is the younger girl's sister. I have never seen any sibling take the place for each other. When Effie asks for applause no one even moves their hands to clap. This is the most rebellious thing I have ever seen in regards to the games. Instead one by one they kiss their hands and hold them out to her. It is truly remarkable, but Haymitch decides this is the time to ruin everyone's heart felt moment and he staggers up to Katniss and wraps his arm around her shoulder telling everyone she has spunk before walking closer to the cameras and pointing at them accusingly and shouting more than you. District Twelve may have just started an uprising and didn't even know it. Next the boy tribute is called and he is unremarkable. He must come from the same area as her but he looks dead already. The airing is over and I am still staring at the screen with her face stuck in my mind. I can see it as if I am still watching it. It plays over and over in my head. She is the most beautifully strong person I have ever seen. I have to know more about her. _

_I am anxious to get to the Capitol so I can see more of this marvelous creature from Twelve and to talk to her drunken mentor. Mags can tell. I am not my normal laid back self for the rest of the trip. Mags is like a second mother to me. She was my mentor during my games and she can read me like an open book. I am almost afraid to look her in the eye. I'm sure she knows why I'm anxious to get there. I am never anxious to get there, but this trip I am jittery. Mags comes over to me and places a hand on my back before we are about to disembark. "Don't fall for her." Is all she tells me before walking off the train before me. Our tributes are taken to the remake center and Mags and I make our way to the mentor meeting area. Most of the mentors are friends, because well having non-mentor friends is hard. They don't understand killing someone else and the weight it lays on your mind. Some days it's so much you can barely breathe. Victors understand, so we are all friends in our own warped ways. _

_Johanna Mason is already at our usual spot and next to her is Chaff. They look up when I enter but the hope that it was someone else fades from their faces. They are waiting to see Haymitch as well I am guessing. I join them and we ask the usual questions about each others past year and our thoughts on our own tributes. Surprisingly Chaff is excited about his tributes this year; the ox of a boy and the little girl. He really doesn't think they will win, but they will at least put up a good fight. Johanna is disgusted by her tributes. She thinks they are utterly useless, but with her she thinks everyone is useless so I don't take what she says to heart too much. Finally she broaches the elephant in the room, "So what to we think about Twelve?" _

_By this time all of the other district mentors are here and we are all gathered around. Everyone looks at each other and it is plain to see Twelve's reaping captivated even the most stony of hearts. Brutus speaks up first, "My tributes are good and would have a chance at this, but she may throw a huge ass wrench into these games….I don't think she will play by the rules." _

"_She is very unique looking…I'm sure Snow is already interested." says Cashmere wryly. Her own female tribute is a looker. Tall, blonde, curvy and with glimmering green eyes, she would surely make Snow a pretty penny. _

"_Where is Haymitch?" asks Chaff. "District Twelve's train arrived an hour ago." _

"_Ask and you shall receive." Haymitch slurs sarcastically as he enters the room. We all look over at him, each one of us silently questioning him. He knows exactly what we want to know about his eyes are sad but show a bit of pride as well. "Well the boy is already dead…I think he will kill himself at the bloodbath." He states matter-of-factly looking at us for confirmation that this is the information we are all dying to know about. We give him exasperated looks before he rolls his eyes and snorts. "Oh so you all want to know about the girl?" He mocks us. _

"_No drunkard…we wanted to know how you spent your year…Oh wait we already know…face down in your own vomit." snips Johanna. _

"_I'm not sharing jack shit with you assholes. She is special and I won't risk any of you slipping information to your tributes." He states. He has been here a total of about ten minutes and hasn't gotten a drink which is odd he normally walks in with one in hand and gets another before sitting down. _

"_Can you at least tell us why you had a look of dread on your face? Or maybe why your district did what they did? Or why you did what you did?" I ask impatiently. I need to know more about her. _

"_I already did…She. Is. Special." He says deliberately and slowly as if talking to a group of three year old. _

_Before anyone can argue peacekeepers come in to tell us we need to go to the City Center to watch the show from our viewing area. We all file out muttering our unhappiness with Haymitch about his sudden tight lips. _

_The chariots start pulling out and it is the same response as it is every year. The costumes are almost exactly the same too. Very predictable…that is until Twelve comes out. They are engulfed in flames and the cameras don't leave her. They don't even show her district partner. She is a vision and the City Center shakes from the crowd's response. She has stolen the show. She is gorgeous. There are no other words to describe this beautiful fiery angel. Haymitch has a giant smirk on his face as he takes in everyone's response. Even the other tributes are stunned. The boys from Two, One and Eleven are staring at her hard. It is somewhere between lust and envy. I lean over to Haymitch and whisper, "You and I are going to be having a conversation about this later." He just gives me a cocky smile and nods his head. _

_As soon as the parade is over we all are ushered to where our tributes are unloading. I finally get to see her up close. She is smaller than she appears. I guess her personality makes her seem bigger than she is. She is so small compared to the monsters from One, Two and Eleven. Beside maybe two other female tributes she is smaller than the rest. Her stylist did an amazing job on her outfit because I know I am not the only man in here staring at her ass. In fact every male in here is staring at her. Haymitch sensing this directs her to the elevator and glares the rest of us down. _

_Late that night after I get back from my 'date', I head straight up to Twelve's floor. I need answers now. I had spent the whole night with a woman and I can't even tell you what she looked like. I had Katniss's image burned into my retinas and I did all of the things I want to do to her. When I get off the elevator I see Haymitch sitting on the couch drink in hand but surprisingly not drunk. I am about to announce myself when I hear he is talking to someone. _

"_Sweetheart, I think it is time you went to bed. We have been going over situations all night, but you need sleep so you can at least function during training tomorrow. We wouldn't want you looking even more unpleasant than you already do…gotta make a good impression on the enemy." Is he actually teaching her? As long as I have known him he has never taught his mentees. And he only sounded mildly sarcastic. What is going on?_

"_Fine…Whatever. I will go lie in my room and let you get back to your first and only love." She snips at him. Her voice is beautiful. I don't think I have ever heard a more quietly melodic voice in my life. _

_I duck back behind a pillar so she won't see me as she passes and goes to her room. As soon as her door shuts I let out a small sigh. "Fish boy you can come out now." Haymitch calls._

"_How'd you know I was here?" _

"_I heard the elevator and only one person visits me after his nightly romps."_

"_Is that why you sent her to bed?"_

"_Yup…that and she does need at least a little sleep for training tomorrow."_

"_Explain the dread." I state._

_He gives a heavy sigh. "She…the little girl she volunteered for is more of her own daughter than her sister. I knew from the moment that incompetent Effie drew her name…I knew she would volunteer." _

_I nod understanding that. I saw the love in her eyes and the fierce desire to protect her that runs much deeper than that of a sibling. "But why were you upset?" I push._

"_She doesn't deserve this and she will win." He says as he gets up. "I need to go to bed…promised the girl I would do everything I can for her." _

_The days fly by, each the same. When we watch the training scores they are again almost too predictable. The little girl from Eleven surprised me by pulling off a seven, but Katniss really knocked me over, she earned an eleven, the highest score ever given. My curiosity peeked even more. During her interview she is again unforgettable in a dress of flames and fierceness for her sister that even the Careers couldn't compete with. Brutus had informed us of Cato's intentions for Katniss in the arena. Haymitch scoffed and told him good luck with that one, the boy would be castrated before he could even get close enough. It doesn't surprise me though, neither one actually. She doesn't really seem to be the kind to take it lying down which won't be good for her if she wins and Cato is sick and arrogant enough to think she wouldn't kill him for thinking it. _

_The start of the games is dreadful as usual. The bloodbath is just sick. I hate seeing the joy the Careers get out of murdering other children. It's almost like they get high off of each kill, no remorse and the more gruesome and painful the better. They make a game out of who can kill the best and the most. It really makes you hate Districts One and Two all the more. The worst though is Twelve's boy just walks right up to Cato and holds his arms out to be killed. I just don't understand it at all. The boy had no fight in him; Haymitch had been right all along about the boy. I wince as I see the girl from Two throw a knife at Katniss, but find it absolutely funny when she senses it and pulls her backpack over head successfully getting a knife for herself and looks back smirking at the girl from Two. She is luckily passed over by the Careers as they hunt and kill another girl who was stupid enough to start a fire. I am surprised at her own hunting abilities as she is able to catch food without any other weapon then her knife and some twine. She can climb a tree like a squirrel, she's not quite as impressive as the flying squirrel monkey from Eleven, but she is one of the best tree climbers I have ever seen. I get nervous when she is dehydrating and am angered that Haymitch hasn't sent her water yet. That is until I realize he is pushing her to survive on her own because he has faith that she can._

_She finally finds water and not a moment too soon. She drinks it and also decides she needs to clean herself up some. She is undressing and washing her outer clothes leaving her only in some small underclothes and I can't help myself but imagine I am with her. Unfortunately for me this is when Johanna decides to walk in and catches me in a moment of weakness for a girl I can't have. "What the hell are you doing you sick bastard? Do you get off every year on children killing each other?" Then she looks at the screen and realizes what I'm looking at and starts cracking up uncontrollably. "You are a sick fuck you know that Fish Brains. I wonder how many men across the Capitol are doing the same thing right now?" and as she finishes we are mirror images of each others expressions. We both realized she will win and will be sold. Snow won't have it any other way. We decide never to mention this incident ever again as we both know that what it implies more deeply than me having a moment of weakness. _

_The fire is hard to watch and I know it is the Gamemakers getting back at her for something, not being a good District Twelve tribute and dying in the bloodbath. The tracker jacker incident is clever and her alliance with the girl from Eleven is a game first. She has a determination in her to win and win on her own terms. She has a bow and arrow now that she got off of One's girl after the tracker jackers and I must say she is a deadly huntress with that thing. Her aim is almost inhuman, other worldly._

_By now both of my tributes are dead and like every year as our tributes die off we congregate to the rooms with tributes still alive, this year Twelve is the hot spot. Their plan to destroy the Careers' supplies is ingenious. It goes perfectly too until the boy from One get the little girl from Eleven. Just as his spear enters her stomach Katniss's arrow enters his neck, killing him almost instantly. Katniss rushes over to Rue, that's her name, and sings her to her death then gathers flowers and adorns the young girl's body with them, all the while crying. She gives the girl the same sign her people gave her at the reaping and slowly moves away. She cries for the rest of the day and night and Chaff send her bread from their district. Among the women in the room and even some men there is not a dry eye. All of us murderers crying over this one beautifully human act in an inhuman game. _

_The boy from Eleven kills the girl from Two and lets Katniss go for trying to protect the little girl. This in and of itself is unheard of in the games. When your life is on the line there is no sense of owing others, but these two get it and they unknowingly make another games first. The boy from Eleven and the boy from Two fight until the boy from Two wins out and the girl from Five eats some poisonous berries and dies instantly. Katniss and the monster from Two are all that's left and they are forced to the Cornucopia by mutts. In his rage, he lunges and she moves swiftly out of the way and he falls off and into the mutts. Katniss being who she is cannot even allow that monster of a boy to die a slow painful death and she sends and arrow through his head so he will not die from being mauled to death by merciless mutts. She doesn't look excited about this win though. She falls on top of the Cornucopia and cries and cries; she is announced winner and still sits there and cries. Haymitch and Cinna along with most of us in the room are crying as well. When the hovercraft comes to pick her up and she doesn't make a move I think every person in Panem may have decided she was different, she was worth fighting for. _

_When I met her after her games I knew she had changed even from the beginning of the games. She had a self loathing air about her, which wasn't there before. From what Haymitch told me about her life before the games it comes as no surprise that she won, despite the fact that she was no Career she had just as much training and practical real life training you can't get in a fancy academy._

Ever since the day she won she has been dying inside little by little, each tribute, each 'date', each battle, all killing her, eating away at her until she is now something almost dead.He knew it. He saw it. She is not the original girl he saw but he is more in love with her at each passing breath than she even realizes. He will fight to bring her back to life. He is sure of that.

His thoughts are interrupted when Haymitch knocks on his door. "Come in" he calls. Haymitch enters head down like he has some bad news. "Go on spit it out…she doesn't want to see me does she?" Finnick asks angrily.

"No. No. Just be prepared. She broke Cinna's heart because he couldn't touch her like he has done thousands of times before. She finally came around and I left them hugging, but just be prepared. It may be hard for you, but realize it is much harder on her. She isn't sure if she even wants to live. She threatened to hang herself when we get back. We will have to make sure someone is with her at all times until she wants to continue to survive and then hopefully live." Haymitch rushes out. "Come on let's go get her." Finnick follows Haymitch to her room.

The others who will be joining them have already made it to the hovercraft. Gale, Johanna, Brutus, Peeta and his brother and even Boggs have all decided to hide out in Twelve until the anger from both side cools substantially. It is the safest place to be. All of the people from Twelve and Four that came with them and Boggs's family had already been relocated there before the end of the war so they would be safe. Prim is staying with the Hawthornes until Katniss and Haymitch can come to take care of her.

Haymitch isn't sure what the living situation will be when they get back. He figures Katniss, Prim, Finnick and himself will live in her old house. He will keep his house next door just incase. The Hawthornes and the Odairs already moved into another empty victor house. Peeta and his family have his. The others will just fill in the other remaining homes as there are plenty of them in the victor's village that have ever been used.

When they get to her room she is sitting on the bed looking down. Cinna is sitting next to her, not too close but silently giving her moral support. "Sweetheart I have a surprise for you." Haymitch says as he comes through the door with a nervous Finnick in tow. Katniss looks up at him then her eyes look at Finnick. Her heart beat quickens at the sight of him and her breathing has become labored. All of the emotions she has been blocking out about him are flooding in just at the sight of his ocean green eyes that look at her so hopefully.

Please Review! Thanks!


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it! Sorry for the longer waits, too much to do in a short amount of time.

Please review; it helps motivate me to continue some when I am having a hard time motivating myself to write.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

**Capitol's Doll**

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/2/2012

Chapter 18

Katniss has a million emotions going through her head as she stares into Finnick's perfect eyes. Love being the first thing that stabbed her, then guilt, then the insecurities start to flood in. Would he still want her? She killed so many, but he has killed too she reminds her self. She is dirty and horrible even all made up. Why would he want her? She questions. She has been used and what man would really want to be with, marry, a used woman, even if she is carrying his child, even if he himself has been used. She starts to shake in her confusion over all of these feelings. She loves Finnick she realizes and if he doesn't love her back then she will die. She acknowledges this really for the first time; she felt it before but always tried to shove it somewhere else as she felt it was a weakness and something that would only hurt her in the end if things kept going at the status quo.

Finnick sees her start to shake but her piercing gray eyes stare straight into his. He instinctively moves towards her as she stands up. She is a vision to him, almost looking like the girl at her reaping. He scans her whole body to make sure she is really here with him. She is definitely skinnier, but as his eyes move down he sees a small bump and his eyes start to water. This is the first time he is seeing a real sign that they have a baby in there together. "Little Flower." He breathes out. Not knowing what to say, just wanting so badly to touch her, to hold her.

The love pouring out of the ocean green depths of his eyes and the softness and hesitancy of his features and body movements help to ease her wild mind. Slowly, still shaking, she takes another step forward; only mere inches separate them now. She looks in his eyes willing him to fill in the gap, meet her half way. He sees the pleading look and reaches his hand to her tiny bump and holds it the protectively, gently. She leans in slightly to his touch and he reaches up with his other hand and cups her cheek, her head naturally moving towards the warmth of his hand. Her hand moves on top of his on her belly while the other clings to the arm that it touching her face. They stand like this staring into each others eyes for what feels like hours, but only minutes pass.

"Fin." She finally exhales. They don't kiss, they don't hug. Slowly they let go and back away from each other. He smiles at her reassuringly, but she doesn't smile back. She can't smile, not now. Not when she still feels like a used up doll for the people. She nods at him in response and he knows this will have to do for now, until they can get home and work on bringing her to life.

"Okay kids lets go get this circus on the way." Haymitch says from the door where he had been watching this display of affection. Cinna nods and heads out the door first followed by Finnick and Katniss. Haymitch looks over the room once more before closing the door on that horrible chapter in their lives. He pulls Katniss aside while they wait for the elevator. "You can do this Sweetheart. You know you can, I know you can. One more show." He tries to sound encouraging, but she can tell he is tired and needs a drink. She needs one too, but she doesn't think anyone will let her in her current condition.

"I hope you all realize this will be the last time you see me as doll. From now on; only hunting clothes and sweats and NO make up." She states sharply. The three of them crack up laughing. None of them ever preferred her dressed up. They had been drawn to the real her. The girl who hunted illegally to provide for her family and would stop at nothing to protect her little sister.

"Fine by me little flower." Finnick tells her with a goofy smile on his gorgeous face. He holds out his hand for her to take so she would have something to hold onto while they make their way to the hovercraft, through the no doubt large crowds. She takes it and instinctually grabs Haymitch's hand too. She holds tightly to both men as they make their way out of the training center.

President Paylor is there to greet her. Katniss nods at the woman but does not let go of her death grip on the two men and both men speak for her. Katniss doesn't care for words; she never was one for them to start with. So she happily gives them the reigns and tries to fade into the scenery. Soon she is on the hovercraft and is shocked to see all the people she sees on it. She looks around at them all for a minute trying to understand what they all are still doing here and on her craft. She looks at Haymitch and then Finnick for answers. Standing in between them she looks like a small scared child, which in many ways she is.

"They're coming home with us Sweetheart. We will never get any rest now…it'll be like a fucking party everyday. I miss when it was just me." He says sarcastically, but she knew he is happy that at least some of them were coming with them. She nods her head in understanding and takes a seat in a far corner away from everyone else.

She should be happy to see all of these people alive, but she just can't feel anymore today. Her heart is torn and ripped to shreds and there is too much weight still on her shoulders. All she feels is guilt, an immense amount of guilt trying to swallow her up. She curls into herself and rocks back and forth humming _The Hanging Tree_ over and over. The others in the craft silently stare at her. Haymitch pays no attention because he has been watching her do this for weeks. Boggs is still unnerved by this behavior. He can't imagine what is going through her mind. Finnick and Cinna sit side by side watching her, wondering what she is thinking. Haymitch knows what she is thinking, because he thinks the same way she does. He knows she blames every death on herself, even if she logically knows it was out of her control. He feels the same way. He blames every death on himself. He will be redeemed in his own mind if he can save her.

Haymitch lifts a bottle to his lips and takes long draw. He has been almost completely sober waiting to get Katniss home. He deserves a drink, to celebrate she is on her way. She sees him in the corner of her eye and she longs for the numbing effect of the blessed drink. She needs to feel numb. Numb is better than guilt.

Gale gets up to go talk to her and make sure she is all right, but Haymitch stops him. Haymitch gives him a stern look and shakes his head at the younger man. Gale gives him a look that clearly says _you are not the boss of me and I will see Catnip if I want_. Haymitch stands firm though and blocks his path. "Why not?" Gale says barely audible.

"She needs space. Her head is going to explode…too many things happened." Haymitch tells him hoping he gets the drift and moves back to his seat. Gale nods in annoyed understanding. He resents that this man knows Katniss so well. He used to be the only one who knew Katniss's every thought, every move. Now he has been shoved to the side by the town drunk. He at least relishes in the fact that even Pretty Boy Odair doesn't know her as well as the drunk.

The trip back to Twelve is awkward. No one is sure of how to act with Katniss present. They are happy that they are alive, even if they lost so many. But they can sense Katniss is not pleased and so any jovial spirits on their behalves may provoke her inner demons. They are concerned for the girl humming and rocking in the corner by herself, but rely on Haymitch's advice to let her be despite their overwhelming wants to go be with her. They are in mourning for those lost, but no one feels like crying. They sit and watch the girl in the corner, everyone at a stalemate, unmoving and unsure of how to proceed.

Finally, after hours of travel, they reach the ruins of District Twelve. Haymitch and Finnick move Katniss from the craft and walk on either side of her, supporting her, while they make their way home. Most of the people who now reside in the victor's village came outside when they heard the hovercraft land. Prim is bouncing on the balls of her feet waiting to see Katniss. When she sees the girl who is a ghost of her sister her heartbreaks some, but she runs off towards her smiling and calling her name excitedly. Katniss barely registers this and looks up just as Prim's smiling face and running body come slamming into her, wrapping her in a tight embrace. At first Katniss doesn't let go of Finnick's or Haymitch's hands, she continually holds tight, not sure what is going on. Once she realizes the blonde crying mess holding onto her is her sister she lets go of the two men and returns the embrace letting silent tears soak the blonde's hair.

The two girls fall to the ground. Prim, now much bigger than the ever shrinking Katniss, looks like a mother holding onto a child for dear life. "I'm so so….sorry Prim. It's all my fault….forgive me please…god…forgive me. I didn't mean to." Katniss whales into Prim's shoulder. Prim confused by Katniss's words pulls her back and looks at her, studies her for the meaning or why she is apologizing. Katniss senses the younger girl's question. "M-mom." She stutters out.

"Katniss. Look at me." Prim says forcefully. Katniss looks up sheepishly expecting the worse. Expecting the mean hateful things her sister could say, should say for her killing their mother. "You didn't do anything wrong. You kept your promise to me. Yes, I'm sad about mom, but it's you who I couldn't survive without. Do you understand me?" Katniss's grey eyes go wide looking at her sister in shock. This is not what she was expecting. This is almost the complete opposite. She looks at her sister's face trying to detect any falsities, but find nothing but honesty and sincerity. She lets go of the breath she has been holding and pulls her sister back in. The burden of the deaths isn't gone, but the fear of her sister's rejection is gone.

Gale makes his way to his family hugging each one and holding Posy in his arms while he watches the two remaining Everdeen girls sit in the middle of the street and try to heal. He wraps his arm around his mother's shoulder happy to be back in his family's presence. Johanna, Brutus stand with Haymitch and Finnick, not really sure where to go or where they belong, but enjoying watching this moment between two sisters. Peeta and Barley find their father and are hugging him, so happy to be home. Boggs finds his family and rushes to make sure his wife and daughter are in one piece. Finnick waves to his family and Annie, but refuses to be any further from Katniss than the foot away he is now.

Annie, seeing Peeta with his family, walks over to join him timidly. She has come a long way since when they first met and although she still has her moments when she slips from the conscious world and into her own they are becoming few and far between. Peeta's kindness and gentleness and hope bring her out into this world and they have become something they both need, a new beginning.

Slowly the groups start to split off and go back to their homes. Katniss and Prim continue to stay in the middle of the road holding onto one another. Cinna looks at Johanna and Brutus feeling the same discomfort in continuing to watch this reunion. "Let's go guys. We should find Effie and see what she made us for dinner. Hopefully it isn't too bad…she's learning." Cinna tells them. They all nod to Haymitch and Finnick before walking off to their new home.

"Good luck boys!" Johanna calls over her shoulder semi-jokingly. She knows they will have a hard road ahead of them. There is no way Katniss is just going to wake up the next day and be anything resembling normal and she wouldn't blame the girl if she never decided to become normal again, if she just wanted to spend the rest of her life hiding in corners singing songs of death. To Johanna that would be perfectly acceptable, not what she would do, but understandable in the light of everything that has happened. She for one would never again allow any man to touch her if she was Katniss, but she has a feeling Katniss will rise from the ashes to reclaim her life, eventually.

Haymitch rolls his eyes and snorts at Johanna's comment. He knows she will be over tomorrow checking on Katniss. No matter how much she wants to complain that she didn't sign up to be "Brianless's keeper", he knows she still feels responsible for the younger girl.

Finnick looks over at Haymitch, finally taking his eyes off Katniss and Prim. "Well, what should we do now?" He asks.

"Give 'em a few more minutes then we will separate them and take them inside to eat. Greasy Sae will be making our meals from now on and Hazelle will continue to clean but only twice a weak." Haymitch responds trying to fill Finnick in on the basic arrangements of their odd household.

"Where will we sleep?" Finnick asks hesitantly. He is not sure if they should let her sleep alone, or with Prim or if they will continue the three of them sleeping together. He hopes she will let it be just the two of them, but with her mental state who knows what she will want or what Haymitch thinks is best, since he is the one in touch with her doctors and understands her thought process better than anyone.

"Not with Prim…we don't want the poor girl traumatized or sleep deprived from Katniss's nightmares." Finnick nods in agreement. "She can't be on her own. I don't trust her right now not to end it all. Plus if she does decide to sleep we don't need to wake up the whole district with her screams when the nightmares come." Again Finnick nods in agreement. So far they both know those two options just won't work. "As with if she sleeps with you, me or both….well let's let her decide that." Haymitch finishes with a wink, knowing this will get under Finnick's skin just a little bit. "Okay let's get them up."

They approach the two girls cautiously, never knowing what may set Katniss off. "Little Flower, let's get you two inside so we can eat. I promise after you eat you don't have to let go of her again until you are ready." Finnick tells her as if he is bargaining with a small child. She looks up and wipes the remaining tears from her eyes and nods in assent. He holds out his hand for her while Haymitch helps Prim up. Katniss linking hands with both Finnick and Prim, while Prim takes Haymitch's hand, walk towards their home.

Katniss is surprised when she sees how clean it is and that some of Haymitch's stuff has been moved in. "So we all are living here now?" She asks.

"Yup Sweetheart, as I am your and Blondie's guardian I moved in so Blondie wouldn't have to live in my bachelor pad. Plus I figured since you are pregnant with Fish Boy's baby, he should live here too." Haymitch explains with only minimal sarcasm and just a tiny bit of jealousy over Fish Boy. She nods her head in understanding, though she found the pet names slightly humorous and the jealousy amusing she couldn't bring herself to smile. Throughout dinner Finnick and Prim hold up a conversation while Katniss and Haymitch both silently eat.

"So is this how every meal is going to be?" Greasy Sae asks as she starts cleaning up dinner. They all look at her a little confused at what she is finding wrong with the meal. "You know Chipper and Mr. Personality talking away about some nonsense or another and Drunkard and Sullen silently eating barely making eye contact with anyone but each other." At this everyone left at the table starts to laugh as they hadn't realized this was happening. Even Katniss lets out a small strained smile at the sarcastic and dead on observation from the wise old woman.

When Greasy Sae is leaving she ignores the rest of the group but goes over to Katniss and in a rare moment of physical affection she bends down and kisses the top of her head. "Baby girl, you are like a grandchild to me and I couldn't be more proud of you. You are the best thing to ever come out of this long forgotten District and I know your daddy would be proud of you too." With that she straightens up walks out of the room not saying a word to the others, leaving Katniss with tears of sadness and relief running down her gaunt cheeks.

Haymitch comes over to Katniss and places his hand on hers. "She's right you know?" He pats her hand a few times before giving her one final squeeze of assurance. "Time for bed Blondie, you start school in what used to be the justice building tomorrow."

Prim gives him an incredulous look, "I still have to go to school?" She whines and he chuckles.

"Yep…don't worry Rory will be there too." He teases her about her liking of the Hawthorne boy. He knows Gale will be jealous when he realizes the two younger kids are dating. Not because Gale likes Prim as anything other than a little sister, but because he still feels like it should be him and Katniss. Gale likes Johanna, but they just really haven't had the time with the war and all to really delve into the idea of being more than fuck buddies.

Katniss remains seated, not moving much like her mother after their father's death, while she lets Haymitch parent. Prim reluctantly gets up and hugs Finnick and Haymitch goodnight before hugging Katniss. Katniss hugs her sister back as if she may never see her again and kisses her head. She gives her a reassuring look, but says no words. Prim smiles at her sister, "I love you Katniss. Goodnight." Knowing Katniss won't respond she bounces up to her room and gets ready for bed.

"Well I think we should probably get to bed too….it's been a long day. Tomorrow we will start a new." Haymitch says as he gets up and stretches. Katniss just mindlessly nods and starts to get out of her chair. She is stopped by both men looking at her to give them direction as to where they will be. She shrugs, but grabs both of their hands and leads them upstairs. She knows it is wrong and hurting them that she is being selfish by wanting both to sleep with her. But she no longer cares, she _needs_ both right now and when the day comes where she feels stronger she will let Haymitch go, but tonight it not the night.

They both understand, they both have accepted their places in her life. Finnick is her love, the one she will be hopefully marry, but Haymitch is apart of her and right now she can't survive with out him. Finnick is her heart and Haymitch is her oxygen. She is useless without them. Katniss showers and gets the remainder of any reminder of the Capitol off of her. She stares at her withered body. She sees the small bump in her lower abdomen and places her hand on it. She is five months pregnant but barely looks three. The doctors told her, well Haymitch, the baby is healthy just small, but that she needs to gain weight. She isn't sure about all of this; she knows she needs to gain weight, but something deep inside tugs at her to throw in the towel. She changes into a big old shirt and climbs into bed. Finnick and Haymitch had used the washrooms in the other rooms while she was showering and are already lying down. She hunkers down in between them making them act as barriers to the outside world. They both hold her as they all fall asleep quickly from emotional and physical exhaustion. She still hasn't said much since she broke down with Prim in the middle of the street and neither are expecting her to speak.

When she finally falls into a fitful sleep she tosses and turns, even though she is boxed in tightly between the two. It isn't until Haymitch gets whacked in the face and she starts screaming at the top of her lungs do they wake her. Haymitch goes to the kitchen for ice knowing he will have a bruise in the morning across his cheek while Finnick reassures her it was just a dream. She shakes her head adamantly. Finnick grabs her face and forces her to look at him. "Katniss it was just a dream. You're at home. You're safe." She tries to shake her head again in his tight grip but can't.

"No! It's not a dream! It's not a nightmare! I killed all of those people! I did all of those things!" She yells at him while hitting her fists against his chest.

"It's not your fault. Katniss. Listen to me. It. Is. Not. You're. Fault. Nothing that has happened was in your power you did the best thing for everyone else, never thinking about you. You put your life on the line time and time again for others. Nothing that has happened is your fault." He tells her vehemently.

Haymitch comes back in a bag of ice on his face. "Well Sweetheart, you may be skin and bones now, but you have definitely still got a mean punch."

Finnick glares at him telling him this is not the time to be joking around. When Haymitch sees her shaking again he knows she isn't even listening to him. He gets back in bed with them and holds onto her. Quietly at first gradually getting louder he starts to sing _The Hanging Tree_. He knows this song soothes her just like in a morbid way it soothes him. She joins in and finally by the third round Finnick joins in as well. The three sing the song in almost perfect harmony that carries out the open window in their room allowing most neighbors to hear. They fall back to sleep singing and this time they rest in their slumber.

Finnick is woken to the sounds of someone down stairs talking. He looks over in the bed and Haymitch and Katniss are still sound asleep. He leans over and kisses Katniss gently on her lips before he throws on a shirt and heads down stairs. When he gets there he is surprised to see the older woman he met officially for the first time last night, Greasy Sae, and Prim chatting merrily over breakfast. "Morning Finnick." Prim chirps.

"Morning Prim, Ms. Sae. How did you sleep?" He asks politely.

"I woke up when I heard Katniss screaming, but fell back asleep after Haymitch came in to tell me everything was alright. The three of you sound beautiful together."

Finnick looks at her questioningly. He isn't sure what she is talking about at first then it dawns on him she meant the singing. "Oh the song last night?" He asks.

"Yeah. I've never heard it before. But the three of you sounded so beautiful together…especially Kat I love the way she sings." Prim gushes.

"That was you three?" Greasy Sae inquires.

"You heard us too?" He asks unbelievingly.

"Yeah I live two houses down. I haven't heard that song in almost fifty years. It's an old rebel song. It was banned by the Capitol when I was a little girl." She tells him. He nods. Then she looks him up and down, sizing him up. She always figured, hoped, Katniss and Gale would be together, but she can see that Gale may not have the patience to deal with that much crazy. When she first heard Katniss was really with Finnick in Thirteen she was appalled, not knowing why she would choose a cad like him, but after hearing his propos she realized he was used just like the girl and she respected him for putting himself aside and protecting his loved ones. She wasn't as upset about Katniss and Haymitch as most people were. There is the age difference, but Katniss being so old in her own way kind of made up for it. She knew both people well and despite people's misgivings about Haymitch she knew he was the only one who could truly get Katniss after her games. She understood the mutual need there.

Finnick squirms under the old woman's stare, unsure of why she is glaring at him like that. Finally she shifts her eyes to Prim. "Little one you best be on your way to school now. I'm sure the young Hawthorne boys are waiting for you." Prim groans but gets up and hugs them both before leaving the house. Finnick can't help but think how different Katniss and Prim are. Katniss definitely wouldn't hug everyone in the room before leaving. When the door shuts behind the bubbly blonde Greasy Sae focuses her attention back on Finnick. "How far along is she?" Sae asks abruptly.

"Five months, ma'am."

"Is it yours?"

"Yes Ma'am."

"What are your plans for her, I don't mean marriage…never really took her for the type to need that sort of thing, but how do you two plan to get her back on her feet?"

"Love, support, routine." He tells her the general outline, but further than that he is at a loss. She nods her head a couple of times thinking.

"Make sure she hunts and has a good partner with her. Make sure she wakes up at the same time everyday and goes to bed at the same time each night. Don't push too hard though she's a stubborn one that girl. I'll be here each day to cook your meals, when I'm not needed anymore I will move on. Our goal is to get some meat on her bones, she hasn't been this thin since she was eleven and on the brink of starving to death." With that she gets up and goes into the kitchen. "Do you want coffee? Breakfast will be ready in twenty minutes, get them up."

He follows her in and pours himself some coffee and sugar. Takes a few sips and looks at the old woman. "Thanks…for caring for her." He says. She nods at him and he turns around out of the kitchen to go get them up.

He stands in the doorway and looks at them. They could be blood family and with as much as they favor each other personality wise he is surprised they aren't. "So are you two going to come eat or are you going to stay in bed forever." He asks loudly.

Haymitch looks up with a groan. "Yeah…whatever…what time is it?"

"9:00. We need to start waking up early so little flower can start hunting again."

At the sound of hunting Katniss perks up some. She looks at them and slowly gets out of bed and pulls on a pair of sweatpants. She walks over to Finnick and kisses his lips in a quick peck. He stands there shocked that she would do that, but then grabs his coffee and follows her down stairs. Haymitch follows too grumbling all the way down.

"Mmmmm Sae. What concoction do you have for us today?" Haymitch says as he smells the aroma of familiar food, not the Capitol's over the top food or Thirteen's bland nutritious food.

She raises her eyebrow teasingly. "Wouldn't you like to know? I swear no people were harmed in the making of this meal." Haymitch chuckles and even Katniss let out a small smirk, but Finnick stands there shocked.

Gale walks in about this time, "Sae? Are you here cooking? I smelled _beef_ stew from across the street. Any extra? I will get you some meat tomorrow when I hunt!" He calls as he makes his way back.

"What you can't knock boy?" Haymitch snaps sarcastically, annoyed the boy thinks he can just barge into Katniss's home just because she is there.

"Oh come on Haymitch. I thought we were past this rough sarcasm when it came to me." Gale answers jokingly sarcastic. He knows there will always be a love hate relationship between the two Seam men who can read Katniss better than anyone else; the down side is that for the most part she can read them too.

Haymitch shakes his head but motions Gale to sit down with them. Katniss has still yet to say anything, but takes her food and quietly sits and eats. "So was that ya'll singing last night after this one screamed her head off?" Gale asks. The three of their heads shoot up and look at him but only Finnick answers.

"Yeah."

"You sounded good, she out sang both of you…but it sounded good." Gale admits. Gale looks over at Katniss and offers her a slight smile. "You wanna go hunting tomorrow Catnip?"

Katniss looks at both Haymitch and Finnick to see if it is okay. Both give reassuring nods and she turns her attention back to Gale. "Okay." She answers quietly. Gale's smile widens as he thinks of spending alone time with her, back in their woods, just like old times. Haymitch sees the thoughts running through his mind and a knowing smirk crosses his face. Katniss notices both of their responses, but shakes her head slightly and glares pointedly at both to tell them to stop their over enthusiastic thoughts. Sae starts cracking up and the group looks at her like she lost her mind.

"Oh, this is going to be fun." Sae still chuckles. They keep looking at her quizzically hoping she will enlighten them on what is so funny. "I just feel bad for Mr. Personality. He is going to be left out of so many conversations with you three." she continues to chuckle some as she thinks about the long hours of silence around the table these three will surely enjoy.

"It's freakish isn't Ms. Sae?" Finnick asks with a wide grin. The older woman just nods her head in agreement. Gale, Haymitch and Katniss shrug and go back to eating. They really could care less if they were being exclusive. They truthfully couldn't help that they could read each other so well, that's the problem when you are so much alike without even knowing it.

Katniss finishes her food and quietly stands to clean her dish, but Finnick grabs it from her and kisses her cheek as he takes both his and hers to clean. She sits back down a little lost as to what to do now. Haymitch looks at her trying to decide what would be the best course of action for her to take. She is set to go hunting with Gale tomorrow, but as for today she doesn't have many options. She will probably not want to visit anyone; it's not something she would have ever done before. She can't drink to help pass the time. She can't fight anyone; there isn't a need for fighting after all of the violence they have lived through. As he is going down a list of ideas for what she can do to fill her time, she pops up out of her seat and goes to the study. She looks for the family plant book. She remembers she wanted to add some new plants she had seen since her games, but had never been able to.

She brings the book out and sits it on the table. The others in the room look at her cautiously. She turns to the back where there are free page and starts to add a few plants she found in Thirteen. While she is trying her best to draw a knock on the door startles her. She is getting frustrated with her inability to draw a simple plant. Haymitch gets the door and as he predicted Johanna is there to check on Katniss.

"What brings you here so early Jo?" He asks teasingly.

"I couldn't take Effie anymore. I needed to get out." She answers bluntly. He smirks and shakes his head in understanding. He would go crazy too having to live with Effie, even if it is temporary. Just as he is getting ready to close the door he sees Peeta walking up the steps to the house. _Just Fucking peachy. Our first day back and it is already a mad house._ Haymitch thinks to himself. In all of his time living in the victor's village he has never had so many people disrupting his life. That all changed the moment Katniss won her games. Slowly more people have been coming around and now with so many near he thinks they will never be alone.

Peeta sees him and smiles a big cheery smile that reminds Haymitch of the too bright sun. Haymitch grunts and waves the boy in while turning to head back to the table. He hears a faint sound of cusses and sees a visibly frustrated Katniss fuming over her book.

When she sees Peeta come in relief comes to her mind. She knew he had a talent for drawing and painting. She motions him over and hands him the pencil while she describe the plant. He effortlessly draws it in the book and she writes the description and its uses down. She smiles at him when they finish the first plant and he returns it happily.

Johanna, Gale, Finnick and Haymitch had left them to her book. They had no interest in watching them work on a book about plants. "So how is she?" Johanna asks straight to the point.

"Seems better…now that she knows Prim doesn't hate her." Haymitch answers. Johanna looks at Finnick for his take.

"It's going to take time." He answers carefully knowing Katniss has shut down. She has put up a small mask to hide the hurt behind.

"We're going hunting tomorrow…maybe that will help…it always has in the past." Gale says. Johanna gives him a look that tells him they will be discussing this later, but she knows Katniss won't want more than her best friend and hunting buddy even if Gale still longs for more.

Katniss, feeling tired from just waking up and working for an hour or so on the book with Peeta, walks past all of them and up the stairs. She doesn't acknowledge them and she had left Peeta at the kitchen table abruptly. When she gets up to her room and looks at the bed, she decides she doesn't want to sleep there. She takes the comforter and pillows off the bed and makes a cocoon for herself in the closet. She closes the door to the closet and sleeps curled up in a ball.

Peeta comes out from the kitchen area shortly after Katniss walked off looking confused. "Where'd Katniss go?" he asks.

"Upstairs. She didn't say anything?" Haymitch responds.

"No. She just got up and walked out." Peeta tells him, looking hurt.

"I'll go check on her." Finnick says as he gets out of his seat and heads towards the stairs. When he gets to the room he looks around and notices the pillows and comforter are missing from the bed. Confused he look in the other rooms on the top floor. When he doesn't find her he starts to panic. He starts tearing through the bedrooms, bathrooms and closets. He finds her sound asleep, but crying in a ball in the closet. He sighs and watches her for a few minutes before shutting the closet door and heading back down stairs. He figures this is a way for her to cope and he doesn't want to disturb her.

Please review if you want! Thanks for reading and favorites and alerts!


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, and/or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it! Sorry for the longer waits, too much to do in a short amount of time.

***Happier times will come, but not quite yet. Maybe in the next chapter…for those of you who want it ***

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 3/01/2012

Edited Post: 7/3/2012

Chapter 19

"Where is she?" Haymitch asks as Finnick descends the stairs joining the rest of the group.

"In the closet…sleeping and crying." Finnick says. His head is down and they can see the hurt in his eyes. "I don't get it she seemed okay….a little manic for her, but okay when we left her and Peeta in the kitchen." He turns to look at Peeta, "Did anything at all happen?" He almost begs for a reason.

"No…I helped her draw six or so plants as she described them and she wrote down what they did and some other characteristics. Then when we finished the last one she shut the book, stood up and walked out. We really didn't talk at all. She just told me what to draw and I did." He rushes out. He certainly doesn't want to be on the losing side of Finnick or Haymitch. He knows his life will end if he does anything to upset her.

Finnick nods while thinking it over. Haymitch grunts his acceptance that Peeta is telling the truth. Johanna and Gale are just sitting there watching the petrified boy look hesitantly at the two deadly men. Johanna smirks as she thinks about how truly funny this all is. "She is probably just tired…you said she didn't sleep much in the Capitol. So stop traumatizing the poor boy and just act like things are okay for now. You both know if something is seriously wrong with her these two," She points to Haymitch then Gale, "will feel it and go into save the Mockingjay mode." She rolls her eyes at how ridiculous it is that the man she sleeps with is so connected to another woman, but she gets it. It is somewhat like her and Finnick. They are deeply connected but she has no desire to sleep with him again and he feels the same way, but they both know when the other his hurting. The only difference is they don't go into a panic about it and well, she isn't sure Gale doesn't want to sleep with Katniss again.

"Yeah, you're right Jo." Finnick says offering her a small smile. He looks over at Peeta and gives him the same reassuring smile. Again Haymitch grunts his understanding. He is having a hard time adjusting to people being around. He is used to being on his own and drunk by now. He knows he can't drink too much since he has the girls to watch over, but he is still unhappy about all the company. He has always spent his time alone except during the games and since the last victory tour he really hasn't been left alone except when they went off fighting. He isn't ready for this much socializing in his life yet.

At lunch Greasy Sae, Hazelle, Finnick's mom, Annie, Cinna, Effie and Brutus all come over. Haymitch groans again when he sees all the people in the house. He has a strong desire to go find a closet of his own and hide out in it with a couple of bottles until they all leave. He is surprised that Katniss hasn't woken up angry and spitting fire at all the commotion going on downstairs. He's happy though that all the kids are at school, so it is at least a little less chaotic with no running children weaving in and out of the rooms.

Haymitch observes quietly, it's what he does best, the others in the room around him. He is pleased to see that both Peeta and Gale seem to be off Katniss mania and found the new scent of other women. Peeta and Annie are overly sweet; it leaves him with a strong desire to puke at their sugariness. Gale and Johanna are much more subdued in affection and heated in their interactions. They bicker constantly, both fighting for dominance in the relationship. He sees the spark in both their eyes. Cinna and Effie are both so proper and Capitol in their public interactions, but their eyes show love when they look at each other. Haymitch is happy for this relationship because they both need someone who will understand them in this new district filled with the crazy victor rejects of society, for the time being until society catches up and realizes they saved their asses AGAIN from two crazy rulers. Hazelle, Arielle (Finnick's mother) and Greasy Sae are like three mother hens running the kitchen and cleaning around the house. He figures when Katniss finally makes an appearance and the kids get home they will be fawning over them like real parents do to kids. He thinks it will be good for Katniss to have a couple mother figures to look after her. God knows she hasn't ever really had one. It's sad when he thinks about how Cinna, Finnick and he have been more of a parent to her than her own mother. It must hurt to know relative strangers in your life care more for you on first meeting than the woman who gave birth to you.

Haymitch looks over at the hard victor from District Two, Brutus. He almost seems like a different person, he has become softer and is offering help to the women in the kitchen, along with Finnick. Haymitch smirks as he knows Gale is going to have a fit when he sees how the older man is looking at his mother; there is definitely a fondness there. Hazelle deserves someone, other than her eldest son, to look after her, care for her. He also knows Brutus isn't as monstrous as he can come off to others, he is actually a descent man, even if he killed dozens of kids in his own games and trained hundreds more to volunteer to die in those games. Brutus had wanted to come back to Twelve with the rest of them; he was excited for it really. He wants to start a new chapter, be the man he had envisioned himself to be when he was so much younger, before he trained for the games, before he won, before he became a trainer and mentor. Brutus is a year older than Haymitch and has salt and pepper hair with dark blue eyes, almost navy in color. He is a big man and unlike Haymitch, who didn't spend the last twenty-five years working out, he has kept his shape the same as during his games. Haymitch wasted away some of his original muscle from when he was eighteen, but made sure he kept some too…_you never know when you need to over power someone and kill them_ has been his thoughts throughout the years, but not one that kept him sober.

Yes, this group is interesting and lucky for him they have all been so wrapped up in themselves he is left unnoticed for the most part. It's not the silence he craves, but at least it's not attention he so desperately hates.

Deciding that there isn't enough room at Katniss's dining table for the very large group, which will no doubt get larger once the kids come home, they decide to confiscate Haymitch's table from his house to attach to Katniss's so they would have plenty of room. No one asks his permission and Hazelle just volunteered it. Gale, Brutus, Peeta and Finnick are sent to fetch it and come back in with it noisily.

Haymitch really doesn't see how Katniss hasn't been stirred from all of the noise and decides to go check on her. He walks into her room and opens the closet door. She is still wrapped in her blanket like a cocoon asleep with tears drying on her cheeks. He squats down to her and runs his hand through her loose hair. She lets out a small comforted sigh and turns some towards him, not waking but turning towards the contact. Haymitch looks at her and decides she must just need to sleep. He won't bother her for lunch today. She ate breakfast and he will wake her for dinner. It won't hurt for her to sleep some more. "Rest good Sweetheart, you deserve it." He whispers to her before leaning forward and kissing her forehead gently. He shuts the closet door and heads back down stairs.

Greasy Sae corners him just as he is stepping off the last step. He stumbles backwards a bit at the sudden attack. "Wake her up. She needs to eat." The older woman says pointing her wooden spoon at him. Haymitch straightens up and glares. Sae glares right back. In the back of Haymitch's mind he is scared of the older woman, but refuses to back down.

"She needs the sleep. She ate breakfast. She will eat dinner. Let her rest." He says forcefully, putting his foot down on this issue. No one will wake her up until dinner or she is ready, which ever comes first.

Sea continues to glare at him searching his face, his eyes, to make sure he is making the best decision for the girl. She backs down and removes the spoon from in front of his face. "She better eat dinner. She needs to gain weight for herself and the baby." Sea says equally as forceful and turns to go back to the kitchen, Haymitch following behind her. He takes his seat at the head of the table as usual and places his hands in his head, anxious to get this meal over with and maybe all these people out of the house.

Just as everyone is getting ready to sit to eat Finnick starts to leave the room. "I'll be right back…going to get Kat up for lunch." He starts to call, but before he can even leave the room Haymitch stands up.

"No!" He growls. "Let her rest! Sit your ass down and eat the food before it gets cold." Finnick looks at him shocked, and then looks over at Sae figuring she would back him up, but she shakes her head and motions for him to sit and eat. The rest of them all look between the three in silent shock. Haymitch really hasn't said a word to any of them today. No one is willing to argue with him though.

Finnick sits and eats his lunch in silence, his normal joking nature drained from him. As soon as he finishes his meal he takes his plate and washes it and leaves the room without another word. He silently makes his way to her closet and opens it. His just wants to be near her, them. He crawls down and gently lifts her up some to make room for his large frame. He curls up with her half on top of him; his arms wrapped tightly around her, and drifts off to sleep. She turns into him and nuzzles her face into his chest. He smiles at the unconscious gesture of comfort.

After everyone else finishes their lunch and it is all cleaned up, people start to leave to go their separate ways until dinner. Everyone, except Haymitch, has agreed to have dinner there until further notice. Greasy Sae, Arielle and Hazelle go off together into what is left of town to see who has come back and to offer help to anyone who may need it. Cinna and Effie go back to their house while Gale and Johanna go into the woods. Peeta and Annie go back to his house to see if his father and brother need any help in the make-shift bakery they are starting to run out of the house until they rebuild the bakery in town. Brutus sits in the living room with Haymitch in comfortable silence. The kids would be out of school soon and Haymitch appreciates this down time to just sit in silence without all of the chaos of the day clamoring around in his foggy head. Too much has happened and he just needs to sit and think through all of the options before making any life altering decisions for those in his care.

Haymitch knows right now he needs to act as father to Blondie and as a source of protection and comfort for his Sweetheart. He also knows he is can no longer be with her in any other way. He is fine with this, Finnick is a good man for Katniss if it had been anyone else he may not be as fine with it, and has been since they were in Thirteen and they stopped that part of their relationship.

Prim bounces through the door startling both Brutus and Haymitch who were lost in thought in their chairs in the living room. "Hey Haymitch!" Prim squeals excitedly.

"Had a good day at school, did we Blondie?" Haymitch smirks thinking how the young girl didn't want to go yesterday. "Anything to do with a certain younger brother to a brooding Hawthorne?" He teases Prim whose face flares up with a bright red blush. He chuckles at her good naturedly and she tries to scowl at him like her sister does but her lips naturally turn up into a smile.

"Maybe…Where's Kat?" Prim asks trying to change the subject. She notices Brutus sitting in the living room and walks over to him. She recognizes him as a victor from Thirteen but never actually met him. She sticks out her small hand towards him and with a big smile on her face introduces herself. "Hi! I'm Prim, Katniss's sister. What's your name?"

Brutus looks at her with an unbelieving smile. He knows this is the famous sister of Katniss. He had seen her enough and heard enough about her, but he never in a million years would think she would be so different from her older sister. "I'm Brutus, from District Two. And I would know who you are from anywhere…you're the reason your sister sparked a flame." He smiled at the friendly Everdeen.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Prim says cheerfully quiet. She is slightly embarrassed that she has any fame whatsoever. She turns to look at Haymitch expectantly. "Where's Kat?" She asks again realizing he wasn't getting the hint to answer her previous question.

"Napping." He tells her. He really doesn't want to tell her that the sister who was always the strong one, who took care of her like a mother, is lying in a closet with Finnick asleep all day because she just can't handle the world yet. Prim looks at him knowingly, but drops it. She knows Haymitch will look after them and cares for them despite his surly demeanor at times. She nods her head before heading into the kitchen.

When she gets to the dining room she stops in surprise at the two tables pushed together and the twenty chairs around it. She had gotten her snack and is ready to start her homework at the table like she has done in the past, but the sheer size of the new eating surface overwhelms her at first. "Haymitch? Why so many chairs and two tables?" She calls out hesitantly.

Haymitch sighs out exasperatedly and heaves himself out of his chair making his way into the dining room while Brutus turns on the TV. "The other adults have decided that this will be where everyone eats dinner from now on. They needed more space for all of us and brought my table and chairs over. Apparently they want to spend time with us….you and Finnick I understand, but everyone knows Katniss and I aren't people, people." He huffs out only mildly sarcastic. He tries for the little one's sake to be less harsh, but at times it is hard to control. Especially at times like this when he doesn't think it is the best idea. He thinks it would be best to wait until Katniss can come out of hiding more and become comfortable with people again.

Prim thinks on this for a minute, nodding her head thoughtfully. "I will enjoy this, Finnick too, but is it too much for Katniss right now? I know you will hate it no matter what." She teases the older man. He is surprised at her insight into Katniss's mental state. He knows for Prim, Katniss has been trying some and if it weren't for Prim she would be much worse.

He smiles at her like she is the daughter that he would never have had, because she is too good and sweet, but wishes he had. "We will just have to wait and see." He says shrugging his shoulders. He pats her on the head and sits next to her looking over her homework. "This much work on the first day? Damn teachers sure have changed." He comments once he feels like he did the proper "parental" thing and looked over what she is learning in school. He remembers Katniss doing this with Prim before her victory tour. He is trying to take parenting queues from what he remembers a sixteen year old Katniss doing with her sister. It will take some adjusting. Hopefully Katniss will resume some of this, he isn't good at all this, but for Katniss he will try.

Shortly after Prim finishes her homework; Sae, Arielle and Hazelle come back to the house to start preparing dinner. Hazelle brings the rest of her kids with her along with Gale and Johanna. Hazelle looks warily at the District Seven victor and her oldest son. She hopes that he isn't just with her because in some weird way she reminds him of Katniss. She loves Katniss as a daughter and understands why she can't be with her son and she is fine with it as long as Katniss is happy. But she knows her son and her son can be stubborn and selfish to a fault. She sees the way Johanna looks at Gale when she thinks no one else is looking; it's a look bordering on love. Johanna doesn't show her emotions well for fear of people being taken away from her, which is understandable. Hazelle just prays her son makes the right choice. She can see how they could learn and grow together.

The two mothers and Sae pull Haymitch outside once dinner is started and Gale, Brutus and Johanna are entertaining the kids. "How is she?" Hazelle asks like a mother full of concern. He can see the immense amount of love and worry this woman has for Katniss.

"I don't know. She and Finnick have been asleep in that damn closet all day. I don't even know how he fit in there with her." He shakes his head.

"Well she needs to get up and rejoin the rest of the world, at least for dinner." Sae starts. "I know her body is exhausted, but she needs to eat. And if you won't wake her up….then I will." She puts her foot down. Haymitch won earlier, but he knows this time Sae is right. He nods his head in acceptance.

"Is the baby okay? She is so small….You almost wouldn't even know she is pregnant and she is five months!" Arielle says as a worried grandma.

"Yes. Before we left the Capitol I had doctors come in and check out everything. They say the baby is healthy, small, but healthy, but if she doesn't gain weight that could change. They also say she needs a steady routine until she feels like living again and not surviving."

Hazelle and Sae scoff loudly. They both know that girl has never once in her life since she was eleven lived; only survived. Haymitch looks at them harshly, but there is a deep understanding attached to it. "Can she even remember, it's been seven years?" Hazelle finally says.

Arielle looks at them confusedly, "It's only been two years since her games?" The three others shake their heads.

"Didn't Finnick tell you anything about Katniss's past?" Haymitch asks.

"Yes that she took care of her sister and she hunted and that her mother…well he had a few choice words about her, but I don't think I understand." Arielle says clearly confused and feeling left out of the loop.

"Her father died when she was eleven. Her mother went into a depression of sorts and only really started to come out some before Katniss volunteered for her sister. They had no money and Katniss and her sister and mother were on death's door until Katniss took over. She hunted with my son to feed both of our families. She was Prim's mother more than her sister. Katniss hasn't had a days rest since she was eleven." Hazelle tells her giving her the short version. Arielle thinks back to the propos Katniss did with the other victors about their lives and the little things Finnick mentioned before it all came crashing down on her the depth to which Katniss has been suffering.

She chokes out a breath, not quite a sob or a gasp, but something garbled and suffocating. "Oh my! No wonder she is the way she is. Who has taken care of her?" Arielle asks.

"Herself mostly. We helped with what we could…what she would let us." Sae says as she points to herself and Hazelle. Arielle nods. They all go in when they hear a large crash and see Gale and Brutus wrestling with Rory and Vick, knocking over the table by the couch sending the lamp across the wall. "Well if that didn't wake them up I'm not sure what will." Sae says laughing and shaking her head.

"Damn kids." Haymitch grumbles as they all head back into the house. Hazelle scold her sons and Brutus and tells them all rough housing is to be done outside before making them clean up the mess and sending them on their way to glue the lamp back together as if it were a puzzle. All four groan at that command and Johanna and Prim giggle uncontrollably.

The three matriarchs continue their work in the kitchen while Haymitch makes his way up stairs to get them up. When he opens the door to the closet he sees Finnick holding her, looking down at her running his hands through her hair. He looks up and over at Haymitch and smiles some.

Haymitch smiles back seeing that Katniss looks relaxed and has a faint smile in her sleep. "She needs to get up and shower before dinner. Can I trust you to wake her and get her ready or do I need to do it?" He asks Finnick like a parent talking to a child about responsibility.

Finnick chuckles. "I will get her up and ready. You can trust me." He says.

"Yeah the last time you said you had things under control and I could trust you we ended up with a pregnant Mockingjay." Haymitch quips. They both laugh, stirring Katniss from her sleep. "Us quietly laughing wakes her, but the shattering of a lamp downstairs does nothing." He continues to laugh shaking his head in disbelief.

"Hmmm?" She moans quietly at the sound of their laughter. She slowly stretches out of her cocoon and crawls over Finnick out of the closet.

"It's a good thing you way nothing otherwise you could have hurt me crawling over me like I am nothing." Finnick teases with a pout. She offers him a smirk and a shrug before giving him her hand to help him up.

"Good to see you awake Sweetheart. Now shower and get dressed dinner is almost ready…it's going to be real fun." Haymitch ends sarcastically rolling his eyes. He knows it won't be fun for either of them. She huffs in response, but smiles at him genuinely. He smiles back, it reaching all the way to his eyes before leaving the room.

Katniss looks at Finnick. She can see he is stiff and sore from spending hours in the cramped closet with her. He sits on the edge of the bed trying to work out the kinks in his upper back. She smiles as she crawls on the bed and stands on her knees behind him and rubs his neck and shoulders. "Oh, God, Kat that feels so good." He moans out. She wraps her arms around his neck, hugging him from where she is behind him. She still hasn't said much, but she is at least showing him affection. He wraps her legs around his arms and lifts her up in a piggy back carrying her to the bathroom. He turns on the water and adjust the temperature before setting her down on the lip of the tub. "Time for your shower. I'll be in the other bathroom getting cleaned up myself. I don't quite look up to par per my usual standards after sleeping on the floor all afternoon." He jokes with her.

He turns to leave, but she grabs his wrist and starts taking off his clothes. He stands there shocked by her sudden actions. He stands there naked in front of her not sure what to do, afraid to move, to scare her. She undresses herself and takes his hand and leads him into the shower. She pushes him under the stream of hot water, letting it fall on his back for a few minutes before turning him around so his back is facing her. She pours soap onto her hands and rubs his broad muscular back while washing it with the soap. She runs her hand up and down his back sending him into heaven with every touch. He can't stifle the low moans that come out of his mouth while her hands work his skin and strained muscles. She slowly turns him around, his manhood fully erect, and starts working on his chest and abdomen. Her hands run gently over his pecks and down to his hard stomach full of abs, then back up she keeps her eyes locked on his as her hands roam his upper body, bathing him. When she feels like she has done her job of rubbing his muscles to help relax him she takes in his lower half. Just as she is about to reach out and take him in her hands he turns her under the fall of the water and starts to bathe her. Washing her hair and massaging her scalp she lets out little whimpers of pleasure. When they are both clean she looks in his eyes then down and back up questioning if he would let her relieve another stress he had obtained do to her. He shakes his head 'no' and sees the tears well up in her eyes. She feels like this is exactly what she is afraid of happening; he won't want to be with her now that they are free because she is damaged and used goods.

Seeing the look of complete sorrow and hopelessness in her eyes at his 'no' he bends down and kisses her sweetly on the lips. When he pulls away he bends to her ear and whisper, "I don't want you to do anything you aren't a hundred percent ready for…I don't want to be an obligation or job to you. When you are sure you are ready I will be happily waiting." He reassures her. "There is no one I could ever or would ever want as much as you." He kisses her on the neck behind her ear and she whimpers once more. When he looks back into her eyes he sees a small light shine. She nods her heads and smiles at him, this smile making it to her eyes as she looks at him lovingly. She gets out of the shower and dries off while he finishes. It doesn't take him long and soon he is out too.

They dress in silence and when she opens the door to head down stairs to the loud boisterous voices that are filling the house she reaches for his hand to guide her, protect her, carry her through this and everyday. He takes it intertwining their fingers together as he pulls her close to him. They make their way down stairs and Prim is off the couch and launching herself at Katniss. This sends Katniss back a bit, but Finnick is there to help steady her. Prim talks a mile a minute about everything that happened at school as they take their seat at the large table for dinner.

Pretty much the whole victor's village residents are there. Katniss only nods some at people and looks to Finnick and Haymitch far too much for reassurance. The once strong girl who would take charge is hiding still and they are left with this timid girl who isn't sure what is okay and what isn't. She eats her dinner and tries to focus and listen to 'the kids' conversation about school and for the most part she follows, but there are times when she looks at all the people surrounding her and she feels so guilty that there aren't more. During these times she looks down at her food and shovels it in quicker to prevent the tears from emerging. Like Haymitch did earlier, she takes inventory on all of the people at the table. Despite all the bad and loss, these people look happy and no one seems to be mad at her or hate her. These sorts of observations confuse her greatly. Shouldn't these people who have all lost people they love because of her, hate her. It hurts her head, these thoughts that contradict with what she sees.

When she finishes her first plate, Sae is immediately up and refilling it, silently forcing the girl to eat more. She knows Katniss won't waste food that has been given to her and she plans on using this knowledge to stuff her full. Katniss again looks to Finnick and Haymitch for some sign that it is okay for her to have seconds, a concept that she is not too familiar with in Twelve. Most of the time she went without so Prim would have her fill. Both men nod to her silently telling her to eat more. She sighs to herself as she places her fork back in her meatloaf and mashed potatoes with green beans. Haymitch must have let Hazelle and Sae order whatever food they wanted from the Capitol catalog for food. This is not a typical meal for Twelve. It could be done, but you would have to be creative in your hunting and foraging to get this meal.

After dinner and everyone is full, Katniss goes to start clearing the table to wash the dishes. Quickly Hazelle and Arielle are taking the dishes from her and shooing her towards the living room. Katniss hasn't found her voice to argue yet, but feels bad that people are doing all the work in her house. She sits in the living room with the kids and the men. The woman shooed them out too when they offered to help saying it would go quicker since they knew what they were doing.

She sits next to Finnick not sure what to say or do. She just sits looking into the fireplace where Haymitch is trying to start a fire. "Are you sure it's safe for you to be trying to start a fire?" Gale scoffs at Haymitch. Haymitch lets out a low growl that causes the men to laugh.

Frustrated Haymitch stands up and points to Gale. "You think you can handle it….we don't want the house to go up in flames with me." He snaps sarcastically. He has definitely had his quotient of people for the next three years in one day and it is wearing thin on his patience. Katniss looks at him, her eyes telling him _if she can sit here with all these people and not go berserk so can he_. He rolls his eyes good naturedly telling her_ okay, but don't blame me if I punch the next person to ask a stupid question._ She nods her head in agreement; _one more stupid question and you can punch someone._

Johanna walks in during this time and sighs loudly forcing the attention on her. She turns to Gale who has gotten the fire going. "What were they talking about?"

"Oh no! I'm not telling you…If I start blabbing all the things they talk about then I won't be allowed to participate. So nope. Sorry Jo." Gale tells her seriously, but laughing. Johanna huffs in annoyance glaring at all three of them. Katniss retreats some and looks at Haymitch and Gale pleadingly, _why is she being mean to me? I knew everyone hates me._ Tears brimming on her eyes as the doubt and self hatred start taking over. She is having a hard time remembering how they acted before, how she acted. She shrinks behind Finnick using his large arm and shoulder to block her from the world.

"Johanna. Quit! Glare at me and her 'cousin' all you want, but I swear to god if you look at her like that again I will snap your ugly little neck." Haymitch growls. This throws Johanna off. She is used to them ignoring her tantrums and glare downs when she isn't let in the conversation.

She doesn't know where the anger came from or what Katniss's reaction is about. "Fine!" she screams back at him and walks out the front door. Gale follows her out and grabs her wrist stopping her from leaving. "What?" She growls.

"She thinks you hate her." He says. Johanna looks back at him in disbelief. She doesn't hate her. In fact she loves her like a sister.

"I don't hate her! Why would she think that?" Johanna ask.

"Jo. You've seen her. Does she look like or act like the girl you knew before she was locked away?"

"No, but I wouldn't see how that would translate to me hating her."

"She thinks every one of us hates her. Can't you see the fear and doubt in her eyes, like we are all going to turn on her? She can't see past all she has done." Gale explains. He can still read her and he knows she is scared that they all hate her and are lulling her into a false sense of security before pulling the rug out from under her.

"I didn't know…I mean yeah, she seems a bit skittish, but I figured that is left over from no contact for so long."

"Why don't you go in and try to make her see you don't hate her…or pity her…that may be worse in her eyes." Johanna nods and Gale leads her back in and deposits her in front of Katniss who is now completely hiding behind Finnick like a small child does when they are scared.

"Katniss…" Johanna starts timidly, so unlike herself, but trying for Katniss's sake. "I'm sorry I glared at you…it's how we are ….I don't hate you…no one here does. You're like the sister I lost." Johanna tries her best to convey how sorry she is to the younger girl. Katniss looks her in the eyes searching for any traps, lies. When she is almost certain there are none she blinks and nods her head in understanding. Johanna offers her a smile and smoothes her hair before getting up and sitting next to Gale who pats her knee letting her know she did good. Haymitch nods to her to show he won't kill her now.

Soon everyone starts to leave, each one saying good night to a silent Katniss. She nods her head at them and doesn't shy away too bad when they touch her or hug her. She clings to Finnick until it is only the four inhabitants of the house left. Prim comes up and sits next to Katniss, holding her and telling her how much she loves her. Katniss turns her head to Prim's ear and ever so quietly whispers, "I love you too Little Duck." Before smoothing her sister's hair and kissing her temple like a mother does to a child. Prim smiles from ear to ear. "Time for bed you want to be rested for school tomorrow." Katniss tells Prim sending her off to bed. Prim hugs both Finnick and Haymitch before bed and scurries up the stairs to shower and go to sleep.

Finnick looks at Katniss happy that she made some strides today and hoping tomorrow will be even better after she goes hunting with Gale. "You should get some sleep too, Little Flower, you have to wake up early to go hunting." He tells her and she nods, but doesn't move.

Haymitch noticing she wants to talk to him alone intervenes, because he knows Katniss won't say it. "Fish Boy why don't you head on upstairs and remake the bed. Sweetheart will be up in a minute." Finnick looks at him skeptically for a minute before smiling at Katniss and heading up the stairs. "Out with it Sweetheart." Haymitch says, knowing she wants to talk to him.

"If you don't sleep with us…where will you sleep?" She asks almost so quietly she is afraid he didn't hear her and she doesn't want to repeat the question.

"In the other bedroom….if that is okay that I sleep in it…I know it was…" he doesn't finish it. He doesn't want to say can I sleep in your dead mother's room.

"Yes. That is fine. It's more fitting for you than it ever was for _her_." Katniss whispers the _her_, barely croaking it out. "Will you be mad at me?" She asks. This is what she is most worried about, Haymitch hating her because she isn't choosing him.

"Never. Like I told you before…we may not share a bed, but we share a much deeper connection and no matter what you won't be able to get rid of me." He smiles at her as she smiles up at him. They hug for a few minutes before he drops her off at her room, telling Finnick "She's all yours now." She blushes, but Finnick has a smile so bright and his sea green eyes sparkle. Haymitch kisses the top of Katniss's head in a loving gesture and makes his way down the hall to his new room.

Katniss gets ready for bed and climbs almost completely on top of Finnick. Lying as they did on the couch in their prison in the Capitol. He wraps his arms around her and they softly sing themselves to sleep.

Please review, favorite and alert! Thanks to those who have and those who will! And thanks for reading!


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, and/or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it! Sorry for the longer waits, too much to do in a short amount of time.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 5/06/2012

Edited Post: 7/3/2012

Chapter 20

Katniss woke up before sunrise. It was still dark out, but slowly starting to lighten. She had slept so much the day before her body just doesn't want to actually sleep anymore. She wants to keep lying there, but vaguely remembers something about hunting and Gale. She doesn't really want to hunt, to use a bow and arrow anymore, to kill anymore. But she knows the people still alive want her to be normal again and if she at least pretends to be normal maybe she will be left alone some.

The arrows that killed the two leaders and ultimately killed hundreds including her mother haunt her. Katniss wishes she had just died in the arena then Prim would still have their mother and all of the bloodshed during the war would have never happened. Maybe she should have just gone with Coin's plan to hand her over to Snow for a life of imprisonment with him, then her sister wouldn't be a motherless child, Haymitch wouldn't have to burden himself with them and nobody would be hovering and worrying over her like a helpless child. She doesn't even remember what it means to be a child.

_A child_, like the one she carries. The thought of this one small being inside of her spurs her to get out of bed and at least try to live. Her mind is a jumbled mess of _what ifs_ and _maybe I's_. She looks at the man sleeping next to her, his face so serene and his strong arms are tightly wrapped around her. He loves her. He loves the child inside of her. _But why?_ This is a big question in her head. She doesn't get it. She doesn't get any of them really. _Don't they see the hollow, selfish, monster that I am?_ She brings her hand up to his hair and gently smoothes it back before she plants a soft kiss on his lips and wiggles out of his embrace. She changes into her old hunting clothes and realizes even they are too big on her. She looks at her self in the mirror, closely examining her figure. Yes, she is skin and bones, but she didn't think she was any smaller than she had been before the games. Here she is though with her hunting clothes hanging looser on her than they had in years. Normally during the winter months her clothes would become big because there just wasn't enough food to go around, but in the summers she would fill out the clothes nicely. She shrugs and tightens her belt and slips on her old leather hunting boots before creeping down the stairs.

Luckily for her no one else is awake yet and she grabs a couple of apples and some bread that was left over from yesterday, her game bag, and with a lot of nerves and a lot of force she finally takes hold of her bow and sheath of arrows. They feel foreign in her hands, almost like they are on fire and just touching them is burning the skin off her. She grimaces through it and silently heads out the door. As soon as the door is shut she takes off for the woods knowing Gale will meet her in their old familiar spot. It's so second nature, but it feels like a life time ago that their very existence depended on them hunting. She hunted because she had to, but she also loved to. She loves the woods, the lake, being outside in general. She feels at home, at peace, outside of the District.

Sliding under the fence, checking for the hum of the electricity that she knows is no longer there, she makes her way to their rock. Once there she sits down the bow and takes her rightful place on the rock that over looks the valley. It isn't too long until she can sense him. He is silent, but she knows he is close. He purposefully steps on a twig to let her know he is there. "Hey Gale." She says when she hears the twig snap.

"Hey Catnip." He responds, a smile spread across his face. She is not ready to smile yet. She sits there looking out over the valley thinking, wishing, praying, that the last two years has been a horrible nightmare and she will wake up and it will be reaping day and this time when Gale asks her to run away she will with out a second thought. Gale takes his seat next to her and looks out, their legs and shoulders touching. _God she is so bony. She hasn't been this bony since she was twelve,_ he thinks as he feels her protruding shoulder and hip bones poking into his. "A squirrel for your thoughts?" Gale finally says breaking the silence that has surrounded them. He is so happy to see her out there, but even though she is physically there her mind and spirit are miles and life times away.

Katniss sighs, how can she tell him, anyone, all the thoughts she has. "I don't know if I can bring myself to hunt anymore." She finally concedes after minute that feel like hours of silence. She figures getting this out of the way will help if she has a mental breakdown when she actual goes to pull the bowstring back.

"I think you can, I know you can. It's different now, but it's still two Seam kids outside of the District having fun." Gale tells her. He wants it to be just like the old times, but without the fear and pressure from their responsibilities, just fun. _If anyone deserves fun, it's you Catnip_, he thinks to himself.

"I don't deserve to have fun." She states blankly. Gale glances sideways at her, studying her, but before he can formulate a response, she asks, "What happened…in the Capitol? It's too much of a blur for me. I can't decipher what's real and what isn't."

Gale sucks in his breath, _shit_. He had hoped Haymitch had filled her in. Boggs, feeling bad for him, had let him in on how she was doing and all other information that he fell privy to. Beetee did the same. Paylor had taken a liking to Beetee and entrusted him with a lot of information. That is why he is in the Capitol still with her while the rest of them were brought back to Twelve to wait out the chaos that the country is in. "Where does it get fuzzy?" he asks.

"When I made it to the city center."

"Okay." Gale starts, he lets out a long slow exhale. "Well when we got to the City Center there was a large group of people barricaded off. Coin was giving a speech about Snow's surrender and a Capitol's Hunger Games. I could see the anger raging in your eyes, the resentment of the two of them. It was something magical and hypnotizing, but at the same time made my blood run cold and still in terror. I have never seen anything…anyone…so beautifully fierce in my life. You shot both presidents in a matter of seconds of each other, but then the barricaded area exploded. I saw the recognition and defeat in your eyes as you realized what happened. God…if I had known…I would have drug her from the barricade when I first got to the City Center, but I had no idea, both sides seemed to be segregated off…I am sorry I couldn't…didn't protect her." He looks at her carefully. Her jaw is clenched and tight, but her eyes are far away.

He sighs and continues. "From what Beetee tells me Coin had orchestrated it this way as insurance you wouldn't do anything foolish. She had tried to get Prim and the other kids to go, but Haymitch had already gotten them out. You mother refused to leave with him. Prim begged her, but she turned her back on her saying that she would not follow any man who had slept with you. According to my mom, Prim decided right then and there who her real mother is…you. My mom said that Prim cried over the news of your mother, but she was more consumed with worry over you since no one seemed to know anything about your whereabouts." He looks at her to see if she is following but her face gives away nothing. She just continues to stare out over the valley.

"As soon as the shock of the explosion subsided, Peacekeepers came and drug you away. I thought Finnick was going to kill every last person in his way to you with his bare hands." He chuckled slightly at the wild look in Odair's eyes at the sight of Katniss being taken away. There is no smile on his face and the chuckle is dark, Katniss knows he finds no humor in anything that has happened. "He can be absolutely terrifying." He finishes still glancing at her for a reaction.

"You tried to get to your pill that was put in all of our suits to kill you so you wouldn't have to face anymore torture, but Peeta ripped it away from you noticing your intent…I guess he couldn't bare the thought of you ending it all….I guess I couldn't either since I refused to kill you when you begged me to….I'm sorry I went back on our deal, but I'm not sorry I didn't kill you….I just couldn't." He hung is head low knowing he made the right choice, but felt shame for not following through on their pack. She still didn't seem to really be there, her eyes still looking forward and jaw set tightly. He guesses she is watching it all unfold in front of her.

He takes another slow deep breath in before continuing on this long tale. "Apparently Snow had made arrangements to make sure you were his, ordering if anything at all happens, no matter what, you were to be taken to your room in the training center and left there unharmed. I guess that sick bastard really did care about you. I remember watching the two of you on TV at Haymitch's with my mother and Peeta and we all couldn't believe it…it was like a sick joke. You with your dead soulless eyes dotting over him and him looking at you as if the sun and moon both rose and set with you….God there were times I would be watching and so scared that he would actually make you marry him. I guess they kept their word, the Peacekeepers that is, because you were deposited in your room and left there alone, no one touched you…and if they had I am sure Haymitch would have made their deaths very slow and painful." He looks over to her again, but it is still the same nothingness.

"Beetee and Haymitch got the tapes they had from Coin and Snow's backdoor dealings and aired them nonstop for weeks trying to show both sides what despicable leaders both were. The one thing both sides have in common is you and their love for you. All of the citizens, even some from District Thirteen, rallied for you. There were crowds who sat outside of Snow's mansion and the training center protesting you be released. I never thought I would see the day when both Capitol and District people would sit side by side, both wanting the same outcome…your life freed." He again tried to gauge her reaction, but it is still the same. He sighs again realizing she is most likely picturing his words and won't react until he finishes.

"A day after you were locked away, Boggs was given the responsibility to silently watch over you from the surveillance. He quickly got Haymitch in when he saw you refused to eat and move, just singing the hanging tree song over and over again….let me tell you Catnip, I watched some of that video and there is nothing more disturbing I have ever seen. You were haunting almost like a ghost…not a real person, but something other worldly and tortured… I remember hearing that song once out in the woods when I was a kid with my dad and when I heard you sing it…well I knew when I heard it the first time it was you and your father singing it together all those years before." When he dared to sneak a look at her he is surprised to see a shadow of a smile on her face as if she is remembering that day in the woods with her father.

"Haymitch got us to write you letters to maybe get you to have a will to live again. You stayed in there by yourself for almost two months before Paylor was announced the new president and she pardoned you, saying you are mentally unstable from the torture and stress both leaders put you under. She likes you, respects you. And we all came home a day and a half ago. On the hovercraft I wanted so badly to comfort you but Haymitch said it was for the best to let you be…I hope he was right and knows what he is doing to help you…I wish I could do more." He finishes and looks at her once more for any sign that she was listening. She slowly turns her head to face him, her eyes brimming with tears.

"Thank you." She whispers, a single tear escaping.

He wraps his arm around her and whispers in her ear, "I am so proud of you Catnip. You did the right thing. Prim is so proud of you. She loves you so much. If it weren't for everything you have done she wouldn't be here with you today." He kisses the top of her head in a brotherly fashion. He likes Johanna, but Katniss's sanity and protection will always come first. He realizes though that they are family and will only ever be that.

"Why?" She asks quietly. She wants answers to the question as to why they all like her, don't see her like she sees herself. Gale looks at her confused by the question, not sure what she is asking _why_ about. She sees his confusion. "Why don't you all see me as a monster…why do or did you all love me…want to protect me?" she is barely audible afraid to ask the question, but knows she needs the answer.

Gale chuckles, _Haymitch is right she has no idea the effect she can have on others._ He like, everyone else doesn't understand how absolutely clueless she is to the affections of others. "You make people want to be better people, to live the right way. Just by your actions you inspire people to want to be better people. Katniss, I fell in love with you because I knew that you were strong, selfless and loved deeply…even if you didn't want to admit it. It's pretty much the same reason Odair, Haymitch, Bread Boy and Cinna all love you too, hell and most of the country. The fire you light in people makes them want to live better so they can feel like they are worthy to be near you. Don't you see that in yourself? God…you are so much stronger than I ever was…you are the one who kept me going all these years…through everything. That day…before the reaping…I wasn't joking I was ready to run away with you. But once again you proved to be the stronger, better person and I know we did the right thing by staying and not backing out of our responsibilities. You have always made me a better man."

"How? I killed innocent kids. I slept with so many I lost count. I am the reason so many are without their parents who fought in this damn revolution. You call me selfless. I am the most selfish person I know! I slept with you so my first time wouldn't be with someone I didn't know or trust or love…using your love for me. I volunteered for Prim because if she had died in that arena so would have I. I am so selfish that I couldn't give myself over to Snow and that caused hundred of people to die!" She rants, shaking with angry tears streaming down her sunken in cheeks.

Gale wraps his arms around her more tightly, her frail body feeling so delicate like any more pressure and she would crumble in his arms. He doesn't say anything but rocks her back and forth until she calms some. _What have they done to her? Her thinking is so warped,_ he thinks to himself, his heart breaking for her. When she does calm he tells her, "No Katniss. You are not to blame in any of that. It is the Capitol and Coin's fault. You wouldn't have ever been put in the situation to volunteer for Prim or sleep with me when you weren't ready if the Capitol hadn't forced your hand. I don't regret us. It will forever be my favorite memory. And I know you don't regret saving Prim's life and neither does she. And do you really think things would have been better for anyone with Coin in power?" He reasons with her.

"I guess not. But how can it be your favorite memory if right after I told you it could never happen again…and then slept with everyone in the Capitol?" She asks.

"Because Catnip…it was the purest, most primal form of love…until the end, I have ever felt. It made me feel like everything would be alright….and everything is…now….even if it didn't work out the way it did in my dreams. But I see now that we will always be family, just not the way I ever thought. It's good though and …I'm happy that you found someone who is just as selfless as you. Finnick really is the best one for you…he is the only one selfless enough…worthy enough of you…I see that now." He smiles at her and this time she smiles back.

They eat their breakfast not really talking, but observing the environment around them. As soon as both are done with their food, they make their way deeper into the forest and start to set traps and he even convinces her to shoot her bow. The first shot is tough. It brought on a feeling of guilt as she held the bow up, but when she felt the old wooden bow her father had made and smelled the earthy woods scent of her forest, she soon started to feel normal again. This is not the Thirteen made bow or the Capitol made bow, both meant to end human lives. It is a bow made by a man who loved her and protected her. This bow she cherishes and despite the feelings of guilt over the slight raising in spirits hunting is giving her, she loves it. They do well, both a little rusty but manage to get quite a few squirrels and rabbits and even a turkey.

She is visibly more relaxed as they make their way back into the district. Her stomach rumbles loudly and she realizes she needs to eat soon. Gale laughs at the sound of her stomach, but his rumbles too and they both laugh at the old familiar feeling, this time though they don't have to worry about when their next meal will be, they have plenty. Gale walks her back to her house, kissing the top of her head and heads across the street to his. Johanna is sitting on his porch waiting for him and waves at Katniss. Katniss returns the wave with less vigor but manages a small upturn of her lips.

When Katniss enters the house she is surprised when it is just Haymitch and Finnick sitting there, relieved, but surprised as yesterday there seemed to be no end to the amount of people. She relaxes at the sight of the two men and only them and her tummy rumbles again at the familiar smell of stew Greasy Sae made. She stores the meat in the fridge and pulls out a bowl to ladle some stew into. She sits at the table and silently eats. Both Finnick and Haymitch smile at each other. Although she hasn't said anything, this sign of her eating on her own free will gives them hope. They know not to push her and are willing to stay in silence until she is ready to talk.

After she finishes eating and washes her dishes she heads upstairs to shower and change. She lets the warm water beat on her as she sits in the shower. She cries, because she doesn't know what else to do. She cries for those who died, those who lost someone and for herself and this baby. An hour later she is still sitting in the shower. She managed to clean herself, but cannot bring herself to actual go out into the world yet. Finnick quietly comes in and sits on the toilet watching her through the glass doors of the shower. She noticed him come in; despite his trying to be quiet he just isn't quiet enough for her hunter's ears.

He watches her curiously as she turns into a human prune. Her skin becoming wrinkly and the warm water has now faded into cold, yet she doesn't budge. Finally after watching her for a half hour he speaks. "Are you going to say hello to me today?" He asks jokingly. The smile on his face and twinkle in his eye lets her know he doesn't expect anything just wants to see if she is okay.

"Hello." She says back a smile tugging on her lips.

"Aren't you cold? I'm cold from your shower and I'm not even in direct contact with the water." He comments.

"Too numb to notice truthfully." She replies.

"I have ways of getting rid of numbness, but you have to get out of the shower first." He smirks playfully. She rolls her eyes but turns off the water and stands up opening the shower door. Finnick has an oversized, fluffy white towel open and waiting to wrap around her. She sighs but steps into it letting him wrap it around her tightly. She melts into his tight embrace and she feels so small yet so safe in his arms. He picks her up and carries her to the bed. They lay with him wrapped around her and her enfolded into him so tightly that she is trying to be one with him. She thinks maybe if she can go into him then he can carry her and the baby on.

His hand roams into her hair and plays with the wet mess while the other hand runs up and down her arm trying to warm her up. She nuzzles in closer; if at all possible, to his neck letting her long dark lashes tickle the sensitive skin. He smiles and lets out a content sigh as they continue to lay together in silence. After about thirty or so minutes she sits up and starts to get off the bed, he grabs her hand, afraid to lose the contact with her. She turns over her shoulder and smiles. "I should probably get dressed, people will start to come over soon I suppose."

He reluctantly lets go of her arm and she scoots off the bed. She throws on some thin sweat pants and a shirt that must be from when she was younger as it actually fits some. She goes into the bathroom and retrieves her hair brush and when she comes out Finnick is sitting on the edge of the bed. She stands with her back facing him in between his legs and holds out the brush to him. "Will you?" She whisper begs. He takes the brush and gently untangles her hair. When he has finished he starts to play with it and acts like he is one of her prep team fixing her hair up for one of the ridiculous balls they were made to go to.

"Oh Dear! What are we ever going to do with this hair? And your outfit?" He says mimicking their Capitol accent. She giggles and rolls her eyes.

"I say we just shave it all off and start from scratch like Jo." She jokes back. He lets out a loud laugh and soon they are both on the bed giggling and laughing like young children. She feels bad inside for feeling this way, but when she is with Finnick she can't help but be happy and somewhat near the shore of peace.

Haymitch hears the laughter coming from upstairs and he smiles at the melodic sound her laugh creates. It is like the best music he has ever heard. If they had bottled her laughter instead of alcohol all these years he would never have touched the poison spirits and instead turned to her laughter…._laughter is always the best medicine,_ he thinks to himself. It is something his mother had told him when he was young.

Soon enough the front door opens and the three matriarchs and Brutus enter the house. _Remember to lock the door_, Haymitch says to himself. The three women hear the joyous sounds coming from above and look at him hesitantly, afraid to get their hopes up. They know whose laughter they hear; the radiant sea king and the fiery huntress. "I dunno…they just started laughing and it is just the most beautiful sound I have ever heard." Haymitch says not realizing his eyes were becoming misty from listening to them.

Sae stands next to him and puts her hand on his shoulder, "Its nice…wish we could bottle it…we would make a fortune." She smiles wryly at him.

"I was just thinking the same thing before we were barged in on." He smirks. Sae always reminded him of his mother. She is strong and loyal with his since of humor.

"Well if people in this house could be counted on to cook and clean then we wouldn't have to barge in all the time." Hazelle argues with a wide grin on her face.

"Nah…I think you all just love the two antisocial people in this house too much to let us live out our existence in solitude." Haymitch says sarcastically. He knows they come to make sure Katniss and Prim are fine and for Arielle that her boy is also taken care of. He knows they wouldn't go through all this fuss for just him…Hazelle may some after everything he and Katniss did for her family, but not like now.

"Oh just let the women fuss." Brutus tells him.

"Oh don't even think this is about us women Brutus." Hazelle starts, "Who was at my house wanting to know if it was time to go check on the little bird and her keepers?" Hazelle wears a cocky smile similar to her oldest son's when he knows he is right.

"Okay, okay. You win!" Brutus puts his hands up in surrender. Haymitch watches the interaction between these two and knows it's only a matter of time before Gale find out. That will be some entertainment he does not want to miss. Arielle and Sae shake there heads at the other two's banter and head into the kitchen to start getting lunch ready. Hazelle soon follows and Brutus sits on the couch.

Haymitch gives him a look that clearly asks_ What the hell is going on there?_ Brutus smiles and shakes his head in defeat. He knows he has been caught, but is wondering when the lady will find out. Like most victors who have had to close off their hearts and desires, he doesn't know how to even go about courting a real lady, not a Capitol twit.

"So how is the she?" Brutus asks, not having to actually say who she is.

"She went hunting this morning and ate on her own. She didn't say anything to us once she got home. Then took an hour and a half shower in which Finnick had to drag her out of. And then they were quiet for about forty minutes before the giggle fest started then ya'll came in and you were flirting with a woman with a son who is deadly and so quiet you would never know he was coming." Haymitch finishes with a smirk.

"I didn't ask for a play by play…I asked how is she?" Brutus says annoyed by Haymitch's surliness.

"She is better than she was yesterday…but not well. Baby steps is all we can ask for. I need to find Hawthorne and ask about their hunt so I know what I am up against when they come down. See ya'll in a few." Haymitch stands and leaves. Brutus just sighs thinking about the man that everyone for so long thought was a drunken fool. The man who organized for all of them to get to District Thirteen to get the rebellion going. The man who loved a young girl so much he was willing to let all of Panem burn to the ground just to save her. The man who knows so much more than anyone over the years would ever credit him. Haymitch was half a man before Katniss but a better whole man after her. She had filled in the hole in his heart. They all saw it the moment he got off the train before the seventy-fourth games had started. He was a different man, a determined man.

Haymitch heads across the street to the Hawthornes. When he gets to the door he decides against knocking since no one bother to knock on their door and turns the knob. When he opens the door he calls out, "Hey Hawthorne…Got some…" He stops mid sentence as he sees Johanna straddling Gale on the couch with her shirt off. "questions for you." He finishes with an evil smirk on his face. He is thrilled that Gale and Peeta started sniffing up other trees and let Katniss be. If things were different she may have chosen either one of those boys, most likely Gale, but things weren't different. And neither of those boys would ever be what she needs and wants. He knows Finnick is the best for her and that Finnick is who she wants and he is happy as long as it is what she chooses.

Gale glares at him and Johanna smirks. _That girl has no shame_, he thinks as she doesn't even bother to move off of him or cover herself up. "Well Jo…I'm so sorry to interrupt your activities but Hawthorne and I need to talk." Haymitch says with his usual bitter sarcasm. She smiles innocently at him and climbs off of Gale grabbing her shirt from the ground and throwing it on.

"Not a problem….I already got off…now Gale may have a problem…I will just be going to check on my old roommates." She retorts while patting his back as she leaves, turning to wink at Gale and run her tongue over her lips suggestively. Gale turns red and Haymitch barks out a laugh while shaking his head. Gale, despite all of his experience, is like Katniss was when she first started training, anytime something sexual was mentioned she would turn bright red. But she is a long way from there now. He needs to get over it if he expects to stay with Johanna.

Haymitch makes his way over to a chair facing the couch. "I suppose you came over to see how hunting went?" Gale says tiredly with a little bitterness. Haymitch nods. "She asked about what happened while she was locked away….I would have thought you would have already told her that, but I told her anyway. She sat there just staring out over the valley listening. She is really insecure…she doesn't see herself as someone who deserves love, hopefully I helped her see that she does…she seemed better. She had a hard time with the bow at first…fear and guilt were in her eyes before she started to relax. She seemed better by the time I dropped her off."

"Good." Haymitch says he looks at Gale in the eyes with as much sincerity as he could muster before he stands up to leave, "And Gale don't hurt Jo…she may act strong but she has lost too much already….if it isn't for real let her down now before she gets in any deeper…or you'll have to deal with a pissed off Katniss." He smirks, but his eyes show his seriousness.

"It's real for me." Gale says as Haymitch walks out the front door.

Gale runs upstairs and takes a cold shower before changing and making his way to Katniss's house for lunch. When he gets there he sees everyone moving around helping each other like a family. Even Haymitch is helping. The only two who are forced to sit on the side lines are Katniss and Finnick. She sits comfortably in his lap and Gale can't help but think of how small she looks in his arms, like a porcelain doll all delicate, frail and beautiful even in her sweats and an old shirt. He smiles as he sees her lips upturned slightly and her face looking calm as she lays her head on Finnick's shoulder. Finnick moves his arms so they are tighter around her, protecting her. Gale is sure of Finnick's love for Katniss more than anything. When he sees the two together he doesn't see their Capitol made images, but a broken girl and a man who loves her more than life. He notice, while the two both have their eyes shut holding onto one another in revere that most of the others have stilled their movements and are watching the couple. Arielle and Annie both have tears in their eyes, not sure whether they should be happy or sad. Peeta, Haymitch and Cinna have a similar look on their faces as his he suspects. Johanna looks happy as do his mother and Sae. Brutus though is looking at his mother with such kindness that it almost bothers him, but not in this moment. Effie looks on with a deeply guilty look and Cinna moves to put his arm around her to assure her she doesn't need to feel guilty. She didn't buy either of them, even if she had friends who did.

"You know staring is rude." Katniss says slyly not opening her eyes.

"Damn, no wonder the kid won her games she has a sixth since." Brutus says astonished as he didn't think any of them were really making it that obvious they were staring at them. They rest are slightly embarrassed at being caught.

"She won her games because she is like Haymitch and Finnick." Johanna starts, "A lot of heart, skills for need, cunning, smart and manipulative." She rolls her eyes as if it should be obvious to everyone else in the room.

"I'm sitting right here and can hear you talking about me." Katniss says sleepily with a smirk dancing on her face.

"Sweetheart when are you going to learn that no matter if you are in front of people or not they will be talking about you?" Haymitch questions mockingly.

She opens one eye and glare at all of them quickly. "I guess when you are as crazy as me and can get away with assassinating not one, but two leaders, people are bound to talk about you." At this the whole group starts laughing loudly. She feels the vibrations coming from Finnick's chest as he laughs with the group. He kisses her chastely on the lips and looks into her steely gray eyes.

"If you are crazy what does that make the rest of us?" He asks mirthfully.

She gives a crooked grin. "You all are crazier than me for wanting to be in the same room as an unstable murderer. I think the doctors need to check your heads more than mine." The non-victors grimaced slightly at the comment, none of them really thinking of her as a murderer. The victors on the other hand had wicked grins on their faces.

"Oh really brainless….did you forget that most of us are murderers too?" Johanna quips.

"No…But we already established that I was crazy so it wouldn't matter to me." Katniss retorts.

"Okay. I think that is enough talk of who is crazy. Everyone is a little crazy." Hazelle says wanting to step away from this conversation. It is just a little too dark for her. She never would think Katniss is crazy, Johanna maybe after all she remembered watching her games and feeling sick at how viscous and manipulative Johanna was. Actually other than Katniss the only other two victors who didn't scare her a little are Peeta and Annie. She still wouldn't ever sneak up on Katniss though in a dark alley, but she wouldn't have thought that was a good idea before Katniss's games.

They sit and eat lunch together. Finnick refuses to let Katniss off his lap and when she insists she can sit in her own chair like a normal person he just smiles, kisses her on the nose and tells her that although she can sit in her own chair he doesn't want to let her go again. She rolls her eyes to this but sits there and they share two plates of food together, Finnick making sure she eats the majority.

Katniss still is heavy with guilt but is trying to live so those people who died didn't die for nothing; she realizes that her not living means they died in vain and that she is being disrespectful to their sacrifice. Guilt be damned she will manage to find a way out of the fog that consumes most of her mind one day and maybe one day the anvil of weight of guilt on her chest will lift.

***Please review, favorite and/or alert. Thanks for reading!***


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, and/or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it! Sorry for the longer waits, too much to do in a short amount of time.

**Fair warning- I love Prim, hence why she lived, but now being a teenage girl she will be a little difficult in this chapter and may say some upsetting things to her sister. All will be resolved, but I just figured this would be a realistic scenario given the story and the normal psychological development of almost all teenage girls. I was one once and could behave very similarly when I felt like I was being controlled. Not trying to be offensive or making a blanketed statement about teenage girls, just going off of what I know from experience and what I could see happening realistically in the story. **

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

Written by: kmac13

Original Post: 5/13/2012

Edited Post: 7/3/2012

Chapter 21

Weeks go by in similar fashion. Days fade into one another and Katniss makes baby steps each day. She sticks to a strict routine, like the doctor's suggested. She has even become more aware of her impending motherhood and it isn't quite as frightening as she originally felt. It still scares her, but she is no longer worried that her child will starve or be reaped.

She hunts every morning with Gale. She spends time before lunch with Finnick learning how to let him in again, have a 'normal' relationship. They eat lunch with their new family. She spends time with Haymitch and Finnick before sitting with Prim and Haymitch after school working on homework, making her a snack and overall dotting on her like a mother and a man learning to be a guardian. Haymitch knows he will never be Prim's father, but he will do everything he can to be the best guardian she and Katniss deserve. Dinner is with their new family all twenty of them continue to gather for meals and then they spend the evenings together, all of them trying to heal and find their bearings after their worlds were turned upside down.

Katniss goes into Prim's room every night to ask her more personal questions like an older sister, a friend would. Then she retreats to her own room with Finnick. It's an easy routine and for the most part she struggles through the weight of guilt and sorrow she carries. There are moments where she starts to feel it lift then something, like finding her reaping dress that had belonged to her mother, sends her into a dark tunnel. Those are the times they find her buried in her closet. Those times become less with each passing week.

She is starting to gain some much needed weight and the matriarchs are all pleased. Katniss's bump is still smaller than normal but a Capitol doctor comes by once a month to make sure both mother and baby are fine, especially given the mother's mental and physical state upon leaving the Capitol. Paylor had insisted on the fuss, even though Sae and Hazelle would have been able to make sure she is fine during her pregnancy.

Finnick leaves their house after breakfast to go talk to his mother, Annie and Johanna. He wants to go back to Four to get the family wedding net and saltwater from the ocean. He wants to ask Katniss to marry, for real this time. He doesn't want their baby born without them being together as a family. He has already spoken to Haymitch and Hazelle about Twelve's wedding rituals and has come up with a plan to join the two ceremonies just like he plans on joining Katniss and himself together for life.

"I can't leave her here…." Finnick trails off, adverting his eyes, afraid he is asking too much of his mother, Annie and Johanna.

"I understand. We can go and get the supplies from Four for you." Arielle says placing a hand on her son's.

"Oh Finny! I am so excited! I can't wait. Do you think she will say yes? Oh who am I kidding of course she will. She loves you!" Annie squeals and squawks in excitement. She is up pacing around the table. Doubt shows in Finnick's eyes as he quickly hides it Johanna throws him a wavering glance. She knows just like Haymitch, Gale and him that this is not a girl who no matter how deep her love will ever be 'over the moon' to get married.

"We will leave tomorrow afternoon. Don't worry about a thing…it's not like she can actually say no at this point." Johanna tells him only being mildly sarcastic, but trying for supportive. He nods his head in silent thanks to her. Arielle continues to pat his hand across the table while Annie goes on about the list of things that needs to be taken care of before the wedding.

Finnick feels comfortable letting these three women go out of hiding on their own. He knows Johanna is there for protection and no one would hold anything against his mother or Annie, especially in Four. Plus enough time has passed for the chaos to die down some. Finnick sits with them and goes over details and plans and writes lists with Annie.

Katniss and Gale come home a little early from their hunting trip this morning as she is feeling tired from the pregnancy and the physical exertion of hunting and hiking through the woods. Gale always walks her back to her front door to make sure she gets in okay, even if he can watch her from his front door, he still is fiercely protective over her. No matter the status of their relationship now, best friends/ more like siblings, he wants to make sure she is safe. After all he has had to watch her survive so many times he is afraid that she will be taken away again at a moments notice.

Katniss bids farewell to Gale at the front door and walks into her seemingly empty house. She gets a funny feeling in her stomach as things are not as they should be. She enters silently and gently places her game bag down by the door and moves through the house, bow at the ready, like a cat stalking it's prey. Once she clears the downstairs she seamlessly moves upstairs. She hears slight panting and moaning sounds, so quiet she has to still her self and calm her beating heart to see where they are coming from. She locks on the sounds as coming from Prim's room.

Her first thought is worry that Prim is in pain, not even registering the sounds as being ones of pleasure. Prim is too young in her mind for those sorts of things. In her mind Prim is still the twelve year old she left when she volunteered for her in the seventy-fourth hunger games, not a newly turned fifteen year old girl who has had to grow up quickly from the war, raging teenage hormones and a boyfriend of the Hawthorne male variety. She pauses before opening the door, trying to remember what day of the week it was. She decides that yesterday nobody, but her, left the house all day, so it most have been Sunday. Which makes today Monday. Prim should be in school.

Very carefully, not to make a noise to disturb her obviously in pain sister, she turns the knob to her room, bow still at the ready just incase there is an intruder. There is one and her arrow misses the middle Hawthorne boy by mere centimeters and imbeds itself into the wall behind them. Katniss was surely not expecting to walk in on her sister lying on her bed rounding second base with Rory. _She's too young! She needs a childhood! _Katniss screams in her head. She feels like she has failed to shelter her little duck and these are the times she wishes her mother was still around. _This sort of thing would never have happened under her watch_ Katniss falsely believes. Katniss doubts her abilities of caring for and raising Prim and the baby in her womb. Despite Prim telling her time and time again that she has always been her real mother, Katniss can't see how she would be good for her. A whore, a murder, a violent person, someone who would turn into an alcoholic if certain situations hadn't arisen, that is all Katniss sees when she looks at her self.

If looks alone could kill Rory would have burst into flames. He scrambles as the arrow lodged itself in the wall and bolts out of the room, down the stairs and out the door so quickly you would have thought a fire was biting at his ass. Prim's shriek at the sudden attack did nothing but spur him to run, move faster knowing Katniss will never kill Prim, but he is not too sure about himself at the moment. Katniss turns her glare onto Prim. "Why the hell aren't you in school? What the hell is all of that?"

Prim glares back, Katniss has never seen her sister's soft blue orbs ever show anything but love, now they are icy and cold, much like Cato's stare in her games. She is mad at Katniss for embarrassing her in front of her boyfriend. "We didn't go to school because we didn't feel like! Besides you never finished and when you were in school it's not like you went everyday or took it seriously. And _that_ was me and my boyfriend, you should know what _that_ looks like, you've had enough practice. Hell you were only a year older than me and had slept with half the male population left in this district and most of the Capitol! I've been with Rory for a year and a half and have been best friends with him since we were seven. The only person you have slept with that wouldn't make you seem like too much of a slut is Gale! Then again he has a pretty rotten reputation too doesn't he." Prim screams bitingly at Katniss. Katniss stares at her sister in half shock, half acceptance. She knew that her past, the past she sacrificed to save Prim every step of the way, would one day be thrown back in he face.

Katniss's gray eyes became dead again, vacant as she looks at her sister in silent defeat. "You're right. I would do it again too since it meant you are alive, but if you would rather not be the next time I have to sacrifice my life for yours let me know…I could use the break from constant torture. Plus I think one pregnant teenager per family is the maximum quota." Katniss turns on the balls of her feet and walks out of the house before Prim could respond.

Prim watches her sister's retreating form and knows she crossed major lines. She stays in her bed and wraps herself in a ball crying, so mad at herself for throwing all Katniss has sacrificed to save her back in her face.

As Katniss heads out the door to go find Haymitch to beg for a drink to stop the shaking that has taken over her small form, Gale comes running out at her mad as hell. His gray eyes hard stone engulfed in flames. He, just like Katniss, values his siblings lives far more than his own and if it comes between Katniss and Rory well Rory wins, just like for Katniss when she chose Prim's life over a what Gale wanted, a relationship. "Why the hell did you try to kill Rory? Are you that fucked up that you can't tell my kid brother, a boy you helped me care for and an intruder apart?" Gale shouts at her in the middle of the street. He takes a deep breath when he finishes and takes in her shaking form and vacant eyes.

"Like you said 'try'. If I wanted him dead you and I both know he would be right now." She glowers. "He's lucky too, if I ever catch his hands under her shirt and his mouth on her body again he will be dead. Plus shouldn't you be more mad that he skipped school?" She shoots out. She watches his anger shift from her to Rory as logic wins out over heated ignorance. She knows he wouldn't have approved of his brother's actions with Prim at such a young age. Prim is like another sister to him and he is just as protective of her as he is Posy. It doesn't matter that Rory is his blood brother; nobody is to touch Prim like that until she is married.

"Got it. Don't worry, Rory won't be going near Prim for a long time. I'm going to kill him… if my mother doesn't first once I tell her what happened." Gale growls, with an evil smirk forming just thinking about his mother's reaction when she hears the story, before turning and marching back into his own house.

Katniss watches for a moment more until she hears the shouts that start to erupt from the Hawthorne house. She continues onto the house Brutus is staying at with Chaff and Johanna. Once everyone was settled and they took inventory of the amount of houses and who should stay with who they played musical houses for about a week before everyone finally settled into their current living situations. Cinna and Effie left about a week ago to see if they could salvage any semblance of life in the Capitol again or if they should resign to living in Twelve for the time being.

She flies through the door shocking the three men out of their mid morning calm. Haymitch came here some mornings after Prim went to school and before lunch, some mornings he would head back to his house to be alone. He is able to get a drink and the calm he needs before the chaos of the rest of the day unfolds into their laps. Both Finnick and Haymitch always leave her a note if they don't plan on being home when she gets back from hunting in the morning. "Well what was all the shouting outside about Sweetheart? Gale tired of you out shooting him everyday?" Haymitch snips.

She glares at him. "I need a drink." She says in a cold low voice.

"You know you're not supposed to drink in your condition." Brutus says. He like most of the older adults has taken her in as if she were his own child. She glares at him making him shrink back a little before shaking his head and chuckling at her.

"What will one drink do?" Chaff slightly slurs. He earns a smug smile from the girl.

"Nothing…Just one…a small one." Haymitch says sternly. He had already talked to the doctor about different things she should and should not do. One of his first questions was about alcohol and he said once she was out of her first trimester and small glass of red wine every once in a while wouldn't harm the child. Haymitch stands and pours her a glass of red wine. She savors it, loving the way it tastes on her lips. She silently sits in a ball with her knees in her chest, well as much as she can with the protruding womb, sipping the wine that is pushing her demons away slowly.

"Do I have to ask again Sweetheart?" Haymitch inquires.

"Tonight at dinner I am going to ask if Arielle and Annie can let Prim live with them…She needs a real mother and to live with people who…." She looks at him and around at the other two men in the room, "aren't so fucked up." She finishes.

"And this has what to do with Gale?" He pushes.

"Nothing at all." She replies firmly. He can tell she isn't really lying, but there is more to this story than he is going to get out of her at this minute.

"Well if that's what you really want…I'll support you…always will…you always make good decisions when it comes to her so I trust your judgment here." Haymitch tells her looking her over for any sign that will give him a heads up about what happened. She gives nothing away and when she finishes her drink she leaves just as abruptly as she came.

"We're going to have our hands full at dinner tonight." Brutus muses earning him a glare from Haymitch and a laugh from Chaff.

Finnick is leaving the house that his mother and Annie share when he sees Katniss walking past. "Hey Kat wait up!" He shouts as he starts to jog over to her. She turns to face him and waits for him to catch up to her. When he reaches her he pulls her in for a hug and pecks her lips. When he bent in for the kiss he could smell the wine on her. He furrows his brow in concentration as he thinks about the best way to approach the situation with her. He knows if she somehow was able to find alcohol and convince who ever gave it to her she is already not having a very good morning. "Where'd you get the wine?" He asks trying to submerge his anger into a calm veneer.

"Haymitch…at Brutus, Chaff and Johanna's." She says flatly knowing full well that this will be an issue for him. He understand Haymitch is her guardian but he feels like he should be the one making more decisions for their child, not Haymitch, and drinking wine at ten in the morning is one of those decisions he wishes he was brought in on.

"Where does Haymitch get the right to let you drink when you are pregnant with _my_ baby?" Finnick forces out through gritted teeth, still trying to seem calm but losing the battle.

"He said the doctor told him a little red wine once in a while wouldn't harm the baby." Her voice is again flat. "And before we get into the argument once again as to why Haymitch is allowed to talk to the doctor and your not…He. Is. My. Guardian. Obviously, despite the fact that I'm eighteen and pregnant, the country thinks I need a guardian to help acquaint me to living a normal life. And I'm thankful I have one because I wouldn't be able to handle talking to the doctors and all the other people Haymitch deals with to let me live."

Finnick breathes out. He knows this is true. "Okay, okay Little Flower. I'm sorry. I just wish that when it came to our baby, we could make decisions and well I could be allowed to talk to the doctors about you and the baby." He wraps his arm around her shoulders and leans down to kiss the top of her head. She sighs as he has dropped it. She really doesn't need to be in a fight with him, Prim, Gale and Rory today. She knows dinner is going to be difficult.

"So what caused the need to drink?" Finnick asks.

"Prim. And Rory." Katniss says.

"Aren't they at school? Did something happen? Why didn't you come get me I would have gone to the school with you?" He asks worriedly.

"They skipped school. I came home early…they weren't expecting me." She says harshly as she remembers watching that boy defile her sister. She then shudders as she remembers the true things her sister said to her. "Do you think your mother and Annie will let Prim live with them for a while?"

"I'm sure it will be fine, but they, with Johanna, are going on a trip to Four tomorrow for a couple of days. They should be back by Friday." He says. He can't tell her why they are going and she doesn't ask.

"Can she go with them…I think it will do Prim good to get away from here for a few days?" Katniss asks shyly afraid she is over stepping her bounds.

"I don't think that will be a problem at all. He smiles at her. Let me go tell them of the plans. I'll meet you back at home." He kisses her cheek before running back to his mother house. He isn't too sure about all that happened this morning with Prim and Rory but he has a good enough idea.

He walks back into his mother's house shouting, "Hey Ma. I need to talk to you and Annie!" Both Annie and Arielle come into the front room where Finnick is waiting.

"What is it?" His mother asks concerned. He just left not even ten minutes ago, what could have happened in that short time.

"Can Prim go with you guys to Four and then live with you guys back here for a while? Something happened this morning and Katniss just asked if it would be okay. I think she wants Prim to stay away from Rory and to have someone more motherly looking out for her." He flashes his famous Finnick Odair smile that always gets him a yes.

"Of course that is no problem. I just hope those two work out whatever is going on. Katniss doesn't need the added stress in her life of a conflict with her sister." Arielle tells him, looking at him with care and compassion. Annie nods her head yes in excitement. She loves Prim like a sister and likes the bubbly blonde's company.

"Thanks Ma. Love you guys…gotta go." He hugs both of them at the same time and the runs back out the door leaving both women laughing at his sometimes childish ways.

When Katniss walks back into the house she heads straight for Prim's room. She takes out a suitcase and starts packing some of Prim's belongings into it silently. Prim watches her sister as tears continue to fall down her face. Katniss packs things she knows will be comfortable for Prim in Four and even her bathing suit, maybe Annie will take her to the beach. She goes into the bathroom off Prim's room and packs her toiletries too. When she closes the suitcase and sits it by Prim's door she glances back at her sister. Tears spilling over her own eyes looking at the girl she risked everything for. Finally before Katniss leaves her room Prim squeaks causing Katniss to turn and look at her again. "Are you kicking me out?" Prim chokes out.

"You are going on a short vacation to Four with Mrs. Odair, Annie and Johanna. When you come back you will be staying with them for a while." Katniss whispers. She is having a hard time letting go but in the back of her mind and in her heart she knows this may be the best thing for her sister. A chance to live with two women who are not as damaged as she and the two men who live with her and a more motherly figure for Prim to look up to.

Prim doesn't asks why she knows why, because Katniss blames herself for Prim's actions and words today and Katniss is only doing what she thinks is best for Prim. She nods her head in understanding and lets the tears fall. As soon as Katniss is out the door Prim whispers "I'm sorry." Katniss picks it up but just barely. Space will be the best thing for the two girls now.

Finnick comes in and Katniss showers and meets him out on the patio in the back yard. "They said it would be fine." He tells her once she sits down on his lap. She nods her thanks and lets out a long pint up sigh. "Are you going to tell me what happened?" He asks.

"I came home early from hunting because I was feeling too tired and when I got home I knew something wasn't right. So I checked down stairs and then upstairs and as I got closer to Prim's room I heard soft panting and moans….I don't know why I didn't pick up on what they really meant I thought she was in trouble. I had my bow at the ready and when I saw Rory on top of her laying in her bed and his hand up her shirt and his lips traveling down her neck….well, I lost it and shot the arrow at him, missing of course, but to scare the crap out of him. When he left I flipped out and asked her what the hell she was doing and why she wasn't at school….that's when she let me know what a good role model I am." She looks at him tears starting to form in her eyes.

Finnick's eyes have become murky with anger making his normally glimmering sea green eyes look like a stormy sea. "What did she say?" He pushes. He doesn't care if it is Prim or anyone else, no one and he means no one is allowed to make Katniss feel bad for what she did. They don't realize it but Haymitch, Hazelle and Gale have been standing at the back door listening. They are the first to arrive for lunch, but once they heard Finnick and Katniss in the back talking they silenced themselves to eavesdrop just because Hazelle and Gale had filled Haymitch in on what they know, he wants to know why she wanted a drink though.

"She just said the truth." Katniss says, but Finnick isn't having it he glares at her with a forcefulness that lets her know she is going to tell him. "She said; 'We didn't go to school because we didn't feel like! Besides you never finished and when you were in school it's not like you went everyday or took it seriously. And _that_ was me and my boyfriend, you should know what _that_ looks like, you've had enough practice. Hell you were only a year older than me and had slept with half the male population left in this district and most of the Capitol! I've been with Rory for a year and a half and have been best friends with him since we were seven. The only person you have slept with that wouldn't make you seem like too much of a slut is Gale! Then again he has a pretty rotten reputation too doesn't he.'…like I said the truth."

Gale standing there is red with anger but also with shame as he was called out too. Hazelle who is already livid at both children just got even more angry and Haymitch is besides himself furious. None of them ever thought they would be able to be this mad at the nice and cheerful Everdeen. At once they move back towards the kitchen to start to busy themselves before they are noticed. Each one angered and each one trying so hard to calm down.

Finnick removes Katniss from his lap and sits her back in the lounge chair as he gets up, a turbulent sea in his eyes, and walks to the back of the property. Katniss can see he is trying his best to stay away, control his rage. It's a problem most of the victors, and well Gale, have. After years of being used after being forced to kill other kids and live with the haunting nights and day, being owned and suppressed, rage is a familiar emotion and one that flairs easily. Finnick doesn't pass the property line, unlike Katniss he won't go past the property into the woods. So he paces spewing every curse word in every order under his breath. Katniss isn't too sure what to do and doesn't want anyone being upset with Prim. She slowly and carefully stands and walks toward him, his pacing has slowed some and she is able to reach him with out too much exertion. She places her hand on his arm to make him look at her. His eyes still murky and his brow furrowed under his bangs.

"Don't be mad at her. Please." Katniss begs him barely above a whisper letting her gray eyes glisten with pleading tears. He doesn't respond just pulls her into his arms in a tight embrace. Her protruding belly making this more difficult lately. As she is flush up against him he feels the baby kick and soon all thoughts of ungrateful, insolent teenage girls are out of his mind for the time being and he is in daddy rapture.

She pulls him into the house and as they enter she can feel the angry tension in the air, thick and steamy, almost choking her. "I guess you all heard what I said then?" She asks the three people in her kitchen whose eyes give away their not so pleasant thoughts towards a little blonde girl.

"Next time Katniss you have my permission to kill him." Hazelle tells her offering her a reassuring smile. Katniss smiles back. "I know I almost did when Gale came back in the house this morning."

"Yep Catnip you have my permission to kill him too." Gale adds just to let her know neither of them will blame her if it happens again. She smirks at him and his lip upturns in a half smile.

"I'm surprised you stopped at the small glass. I would have figured you would have taken the whole bottle." Haymitch says trying to lighten the mood but failing miserably when he notices Momma Hawthorne and Gale swivel on their feet and glare at him.

"You let her drink!" They shout in unison.

"The doctor said a little now and again won't harm the baby. I just had a small cup." Katniss jumps in to rescue Haymitch from the attack. They both grumble something about 'dumbass Capitol doctors' and 'useless drunken victors'. Causing the three victors in the house to chuckle and earning them glares.

Soon all the other adults are there for their normal lunch and they eat lunch, clean up and head their separate ways. Katniss and Haymitch drag Prim to school to collect her assignments for the week as she will be going to Four. Her teacher is very accommodating but it's rare to find someone who isn't bending over backwards for Katniss since the war. When they get home Haymitch orders Prim to her room to work on her work and not to come down until dinner.

They can tell Prim is ashamed of her actions and words today so they don't lecture her, but most of the adult in the know aren't too fond of looking at her right now. She knows she is not their favorite person right now, hell if she could get away from herself right now she would. She hates that she was so mean to Katniss.

At dinner that night, the usual jovial atmosphere is gone and neither Prim nor Rory dare glance up or look at each other. Katniss clears her throat half way through dinner and looks at Arielle. "Thank you, for being able to take Prim with you to Four on such short notice and letting her stay with you for a while when you get back. I really think it is for the best right now. She needs a female mother figure she can look up to and obviously I am not fit for that, especially given our living situation…it's not the best for an impressionable young girl to live with three ex-whores and killers. She needs a more stable role model." When she finishes her monologue of thanks and explanation she looks back down at her food and silently eats.

Prim is crying at the table but for the first time looks up and at Katniss. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean it and shouldn't have said it! I will never touch Rory or any other boy again and I will go to school on Saturdays too! You are the best role model there is….Not for the things you were forced to do to…to save me, but that fact that you did them with out a care for your self! I am so so sorry. Please look at me, forgive me." Prim sobs. At the mention of his name Rory blushes feverishly and bows his head even lower in embarrassment.

Katniss sighs looking Prim in the eyes the same way she has always looked at her with love and devotion. "Prim you spoke the truth and I have been delusional to think you would be able to live with us and not be affected. I am not saying this move is permanent just something that may be beneficial for you…all I have ever done is think of you first and that is all I am doing now. I am not mad at you. I just want what's best for you. So please trust me when I say that I think for a short while this will be the best for you."

"Okay. I…Love…you. I will do whatever you think is best for me." Prim says in between sobs.

"Good. Now stop crying and making your food soggy and eat it. Hazelle, Greasy Sae and Arielle worked very hard on it and Gale and I worked very hard to make sure we all get to eat fresh meat and greens. Peeta and his dad made wonderful rolls that I am sure won't taste as good all wet and if you eat all your food they even made a chocolate cake for desert. Be thankful and eat my little duck." Katniss tells her in a very motherly way.

For most of the people at the table this side of Katniss is new. They did not see this side much in the past months or since they met the girls. Katniss was too withdrawn trying to claw her way back to reality. But for the Hawthornes this is like the old days, the days before the dreadful seventy-fourth hunger games. They all realize then and there that there will be no better mother than Katniss for both Prim and the baby. Prim realizes she has always had the best mother in the world, she just came in the form of a very overprotective big sister.

In the morning, Katniss and Finnick walk Arielle, Annie, Prim and Johanna to the train station. They all hug one another and say their goodbyes. Katniss grabs hold of Prim in a super tight embrace. "Be good little duck. Mind your manners and listen to them, do as they say. I love you." She kisses her sister on her forehead having to stand on her toes to reach up. Finnick and Katniss watch from the platform as the train departs waving at the four on their journey to Four.

When Katniss and Finnick get home they find a note from Haymitch.

_Hey Kids,_

_Gone to my place for a few days. If you need anything holler. Sae will be coming by each day to make you food so you better eat Sweetheart, but other than that the house is all yours for the next three days. I've warned everyone else to stay the hell off your property and if I see them especially Rory come near I will be waiting on my porch with a shot gun and a bottle of Ripper's best. Use the time wisely…May I suggest actually setting up the nursery? The demon spawn will be coming soon and if it's anything like it's mother it will be stubborn and demanding. And don't worry Fish Boy you can't knock her up again while she is already pregnant._

_ -Hay_

Finnick looks over at Katniss with a questioning smile asking 'do you wanna?' She inhales deeply and looks him up and down drinking in his beautiful features before licking her lips and nodding her head. They spend the rest of the day in worship of each other. Finnick treats her body like a holy temple and lavishes her with pleasure taking his time to savor every last inch of her, the soon to be mother of his child. He treats her like the goddess he sees her to be. His hands leading the trail up and down her body as his lips follow. His touch causing her skin to goose in a hot fever as he skillfully and purposely hits her most sensitive places. Between the pregnancy hormones and the normal teenage hormones she has she is begging him for release over and over again. They spend the majority of the day naked and in each other's arms.

As the day is coming to a close and they are lying in bed together with his hand over her belly and her hand over his heart he whispers, "Will you marry?" This time she knows he is serious. She knows this is what he wants. Before she can second guess herself, doubt herself, think about all of her reasons throughout the years of why this would be a horrible idea she whispers "Yes" back. Both falling asleep happy and hopeful for the future.

Thanks for reading! Please review!


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: I would like to thank all of the people who have read this and reviewed, made it a favorite, and/or added it to an alert. I really and truly appreciate it! Sorry for the longer waits, too much to do in a short amount of time.

This will be the last chapter of the story and it's shorter than most of mine, I know, sorry. I just have nowhere else to go with it. I will be writing an epilogue, but that will come later. It may be quite a wait actually. I am in the process of moving across the country and maybe even having a bit of a vacation. I will try and write it soon, but with my schedule I can't promise anything. Once this story is done I will be going back through to re-edit it and my other two stories as they are poorly written grammatically and it's been making me nervous. I will be starting a new story hopefully by late June early July.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Hunger Games series or any of its characters.

Chapter 22

The next morning Finnick and Katniss awake completely entangled with each other. Both using their bodies to shield Katniss's growing womb from both real and imagined danger. Katniss's dreams are plagued with memories of Snow and then fabrications of him coming back from the dead and taking her and Finnick's child. Finnick doesn't know the depths her fears run, but has become increasingly worried as the number of times he has to stir her awake a night has increased to six or seven times a night as opposed to the one or two times a night before she became pregnant and the three times a night before she was imprisoned.

Finnick has his own nightmares, but just feeling Katniss in his arms keeps them at bay. He hasn't had the same mental brainwash of torture from Snow that she endured. He has nightmares of his games, the ones he's mentored, of her games, of the war, but none for the future.

"Good morning Little Flower." Finnick whispers, smiling as he buries his face in her hair inhaling her scent. He runs his hands up and down her bare back feeling the silky soft skin under his fingertips.

"Morning" She hums back placing soft kisses on his chest. She inhales his chest deeply wondering if she will ever tire of his scent, the intoxicating aroma that is all his own. He laughs as her slender fingers tickle his side as she lazily and like a feather runs them up and down along his ribcage. She grins wickedly into his chest as she realizes he is slightly ticklish. She wouldn't have guessed it with how confident in his body he seems. She was ticklish a long time ago, but after all the time she has spent being nothing more than an instrument for other's physical pleasure her hesitancy at being touched has long since vanished, though she still is reluctant to be touched by most.

"Don't even think about it." He warns warmly. "We are just lying here enjoying waking up together for once and you are not going to ruin it because you found a weakness on me that you want to use against me. You have weakness too…don't make me use them." He smirks thinking about how her body writhes when his lips meet a certain spot on her neck just before it hits her clavicle or the uninhibited moans that fall freely from her full lips when his fingers tease and hover over her center. She blushes knowing he is relishing in thinking about her weaknesses. Her hand slowly moves from his ribcage down the side of his defined 'v' before her small hand is wrapped around his hardening member. She gives a satisfied smile knowing that her own weaknesses make him slightly weak too. As her grip tightens and she slowing moves her hand up and down he lets out a shaky breath followed by a guttural moan that sends a chill of pleasure up her spin.

Deciding that she needs to stay in control she forces her own growing needs out of the way before she lowers her head to his and kisses the tip tenderly. With a mischievous glint in her eye and a crooked smile she lets go of him and quickly removes herself from the bed, hurrying into the bathroom to shower and change for the day.

"Damn it all to Hell" Finnick mutters, his head looking up then flopping back on the bed, as he hears the shower and comes out of the revelry of her touch. He was so deep into it that he hadn't even noticed her movements or the loss of her warm touch at first.

He gets out of bed cursing the power that she has over him and begrudgingly gets dressed. He wait for her to get out of the bathroom and when she finally comes out with a towel wrapped around her he is backing her into a wall. She lets out a small squeak as his lips forcefully attack hers but she welcomes the attack and returns it happily. When he pulls away he whispers in her ear, "You are mean you know that? I will get you back though, don't you worry about that." He pulls all the way back to look at her reaction, but she still wears a satisfied smirk. Exasperated he lets out a groan and shakes his head. _I think she finally realizes the effect she has on people_ he thinks to himself as he gives her room to change.

"Where should we set up the nursery?" Finnick asks as they leave their room. All of the victor's homes have six bedrooms and six and a half baths plus guest or servant quarters behind the property. Three of their rooms already have occupant even if they are not all currently occupied; Haymitch stays in her mother's old room and Prim stays in the first room when you come up the stares across from Haymitch's room. Their room is at the end of the hall, the true master bedroom. There are two rooms on either side of theirs and another own closer towards the stares next to Prim's.

"I would like this room," Katniss comments pointing to the room to the right of theirs. "but I would like to build a door connecting the two rooms to make it safer and easier for me to have access to the baby." She looks up at him hesitantly, unsure if he will be happy to share a door with the baby's room. He gives her a questioning look but smiles reassuringly at her sensing her hesitancy.

"Why the door?" He asks gently as they make their way down the stares toward the kitchen. The smell of Greasy Sae's cooking leading them.

"I would just feel safer… more comfortable knowing I can get to the baby as quickly as possible. I just don't want anything to happen to her." Katniss argues, frustrated to have to explain herself. She doesn't want to tell him why she wants it, because he will tell her she is ridiculous for having the fears she has. Fear of a dead president. A president she personally killed with an arrow. He thinks for a minute and sees the quick anger and resentment at being questioned and decides that he will do whatever she needs done, if only to make her happy.

"Okay. Sounds good. I will get Brutus and Gale and Peeta to come over and help." He smiles at her lovingly to let her know she has won. She offers up a weak smile. He starts to serve them breakfast as he continues his plans hoping she will be for them. "Peeta can paint the room since he is so good at it. Maybe we can even get him to do a mural on one of the walls or something. Gale, Brutus and I can build the door and all the furniture and you can sit around and boss around all of your men." He winks at her when he finishes knowing that she has all of them wrapped around her fingers, even if she doesn't want to.

Rolling her eyes she sighs at his foolish thoughts. "Alright."

After breakfast they go to collect their three helpers. Gale and Peeta eagerly join as their own women have gone off on a mysterious mission to Four for Finnick. Annie and Johanna both promised to keep all of the wedding plans under wraps especially from Gale as they know he would spill the beans to Katniss the first chance he got. Not because he doesn't want her to marry Finnick but because he knows how Katniss feels about surprises and feeling corned and wouldn't want her feeling that way. His loyalty will always lie with Katniss first, not Finnick or Haymitch. Brutus was a little harder to convince but once Katniss quietly promised to put a good word in for him with Hazelle he agreed.

Katniss decides with Peeta that she would like a mural of the ocean with a sunset on one wall with the rest of the room being painted to color of the creamy white sands on the beaches of Four. Finnick loves the idea, knowing it will make both of them happy to see a reminder of the happier and somewhat carefree times they spent on the beach during her victory tour and Peeta's. Finnick and Brutus get to work on the door and Gale starts on the white baby furniture they ordered from the Capitol. Katniss leaves them to do their work asking Hazelle to stop by every once in a while to check on them. Katniss heads over to a house that she once considered home, not home like the now destroyed Seam home had been, but a home she had found with her mentor.

"I'm surprised to see you up and looking somewhat sober." She comments when she sees him sitting alone in the dark living room, all the shades being drawn.

"Got tired of all your boys tripping over themselves to set up the baby's room for you?" He snarks back. She lets out an airy laugh and plops down next to him.

"You know, if you wanted to help all you had to do was come over." She glances at him before continuing, "But then again I didn't take you for one to build things…thought you were like me only could destroy." She says back showing as much sarcasm as he is.

He chuckles before admitting, "You know me so well Sweetheart. I suppose that is why you are over here now and not helping them either."

"Yup. I can destroy the Hunger Games, destroy the Capitol, kill off thousands, but ask me to build something and I am at a loss like you without a bottle." She smirks looking at him with a fondness only they can truly understand. To the outside world it would look a little like disdain, but they know it is fondness.

"You had a lot of help destroying those things." Haymitch says back tilting the bottle towards himself before taking a swallow.

"Yes I did." She gives him an almost imperceptible grateful smile. "Thanks by the way…no matter how fucked up I am, I know I always have you to blame." This is her way of saying thanks for everything; for giving her a chance at life, freeing her, taking care of her, loving her in a way only he can, like a lover, mother, father, mentor, friend…a soul mate. A soul mate that will never be more than what they are now, no longer the lover part, just a vital organ to keep each other a live.

"Don't go getting all emotional on me. You forced yourself into my life not the other way around." This is his way of saying thanks for pulling me half way out of the bottle and giving me the ability to give a shit again. They sit in assumed comfortable silence, just passing time without the pressures of the outside world weighing them down in this dark room.

When the sun is starting to set, he notices her fidgeting fingers and her darting eyes. He sees the fear she has to go back to her place and sleep and keep putting up the act of being truly excited and happy for the baby. He knows she is scared shitless and doesn't know how to feel completely. He lays his hand over hers and looks at her almost sternly. "You can do this. Out of everything you have gone through…this is something you can do and do with a real smile." She nods her head and hugs him before getting up and walking out of the house and back to the other one. Neither house feeling quite like her home, but neither feeling wrong, only feeling right and like she belongs.

Prim calls that evening to let her know she is safe and being a good girl and to tell her again how sorry she is. Katniss brushes off the apology saying there is nothing to apologize for and to have fun and be safe. As soon as the two girls hang up Rory knocks on the door. Peeta and Gale are still over as Finnick invited them for dinner, obviously not worried that either younger man still feels something for Katniss. He knows Katniss doesn't return the feelings and is his. Gale and Peeta both like Finnick and have actually over the past few months grown to be good friends with him.

Katniss opens the odd surprised to see the younger Hawthorne boy. Her face automatically drops into a deep foreboding scowl. Once again if looks could kill Rory would burst into flames. Her stomach pulls and a gush of pain emanates from it. She grimaces, gnawing her teeth together, only making Rory all the more wish he were engulfed in flames. The pain subsides and her scowl returns, brushing off the pain as nothing more than the baby getting a really good kick in. _That a girl! Even you don't like Rory at this moment._ Katniss muses to herself. Thinking of this tiny baby trying to kick Rory out of her presence. Katniss gives him a look that clearly asks _What the hell do you want?_

"I'm s-s-sorry K- Ka- Katniss. Are th-there any ch-chores you want me to do around your house after school t-to-tomorrow?" He stutters out, knees shaking in fear of a girl who only comes up to his bicep. Like his brother and Finnick he is exceptionally tall, making the girl in front of him look even smaller than she already is. But to anyone really looking she appears to be bigger and much more frightening than even the biggest man. _It's no wonder she won her games against the likes of the giants in the arena. No one wants to go up against her._ Rory thinks to himself while feeling like the lasers staring at him, that she calls eyes, are burning strategic designs in his body.

Suddenly she grimaces again in pain and feels an even stronger pull from below. Again she brushes is off as the baby saying_ get that damn idiot out of my sight._ Once the pain goes away she grins wickedly thinking of the most horrible chore she has for him. He becomes even more uneasy at her wicked grin than her scowl knowing full well she is plotting. "Yes actually I do have a job for you. You need to go to my old house and clean every crevice. I know your mom has been busy helping those who have come back and hasn't had enough time to clean it. I will warn you though, I just left it and the smell of weeks' old alcohol permeates, so you may want to wear something over your nose and mouth to make sure you don't receive any more brain damage, seeing as how you are already missing quite a few cells up there." She smirks at him as the knowledge of his assignment, punishment really, sinks in.

He looks at her in almost disbelief, he knew it would be bad and that she is still furious with him, but she is still like an older sister, second mother to him, he was hoping for a little compassion. He nods his head in acceptance of his assignment and when he looks at her he sees the frail girl she really should be. She is doubled over in pain as she clasps her stomach with one arm and the door frame with another. He isn't too sure where Finnick or Gale are; he hopes they're still upstairs. "Katniss what's wrong?" He rushes to put his arms around her comfortingly. She is in so much pain she doesn't even care whose arm is around her.

"Baby" she gasps out as the pain slowly subsides. She starts to straighten back out to stand up straight still holding the door frame and letting her least favorite Hawthorne continue to keep his arm around her. "Either this baby hates your guts or there is something wrong. I am only in my seventh month I shouldn't be having these pains yet."

"That's why you were alternating between a scowl and a grimace. I honestly thought it was a new scare tactic for you…it works by the way for future reference." He looks down at her and she actually cracks a wry smile at him. "Alright can you walk? Where are Finnick and Gale?"

"You are alright Rory. I think I may forgive you as long as you keep your hands and lips off my sister until you two get married a **long** time from now and you finish your assignment." She looks up at the boy she helped Gale raise realizing they didn't do too bad of a job considering they were kids themselves, but they at least had some help with Hazelle, unlike her own mother who had been completely useless.

"Thanks Katniss…You always were my favorite parent." He has a genuine goofy smile on. Another wave of pain, not as bad as the last racks her body. His grip tightens around her protectively. "Gale! Finnick! Peeta! Haymitch! Brutus! Mom! Somebody!" He yells while standing in the doorway, framing her head with one of his arms to block out the loudness of his yells.

All at once Gale, Finnick and Peeta bound down the stairs and Hazelle, Haymitch and Brutus coming running out of their own doors as fast as they can. When they all reach the spot that Katniss and Rory are occupying they look at Rory holding tight onto Katniss and Katniss hunching over in pain. "What the hell did you do to her?" They all yell simultaneously.

"Nothing! I came over to see if she had any chores for me to do so I could make amends and get back in her good graces, because despite what everyone thinks I didn't do anything to purposefully make Katniss upset. I love her like a big sister!" He stares them all down for a second before continuing on with the story. "And she has been having intervals of pain in her stomach."

"Call the doctor in the Capitol." Hazelle orders Haymitch, taking control of the situation. "Go get Sae" She barks at Peeta. "Go get clean sheets on her bed." She orders at Brutus. "Go call Arielle and the girls in Four." She instructs Finnick since he would be the only one with the number. He doesn't want to leave Katniss's side as he had just gotten there, but does as he is told. Hazelle seems intent on keeping Katniss still for the time being and switching who is hold her up at the moment would defeat the purpose. "Go get a bucket of hot water and a bowl of ice along with several clean towels and washcloths." She continues ordering Gale, who is also reluctant to leave her side. It isn't his baby, but it is his Catnip, his best friend, his family.

Haymitch is the first back. "Doctor's taking the presidential hovercraft and is on his way now." Haymitch informs them.

"Good, good. Hopefully he will arrive in time." Hazelle says lost in thought, tears springing from her eyes at seeing Katniss in pain again. She knew the day when Katniss gave birth she would be in pain again, but she didn't think it would affect her this way. She is just so tired of seeing Katniss fight, even if it is to give birth.

"They will be back tomorrow morning." Finnick says almost out of breath. Hazelle just nods her response as Peeta and Sae come up to the door.

"What's going on?" Sae asks concern evident on her face as she takes in the sight at the front door.

"She's having intervals of pain. Doctor is on his way. Waiting to move her until her bed is ready." Hazelle catches Sae up.

"Okay bed is ready" "Room is set up with supplies" Both Brutus and Gale call down at the same time.

"Finnick you carry her up the stairs be careful not to move her too much. Sae and I are going to be up in a second. Rory go watch Vick and Posy, Peeta go with him. Haymitch bring some of your stash over in case we need an antiseptic." Hazelle gives everyone their marching orders and takes off to the kitchen with Sae on her heels.

Finnick carefully lifts Katniss in his arms. "Everything will be all right Kat. I'll never leave your side." He whispers reassuringly as he slowly and carefully brings her up the stairs.

"I'm so sorry." She whimpers feeling hot tears start to pool in her eyes.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." He tells her firmly; indicating there will be no arguing this over. She nods her heads once letting him know he has won for now.

All too soon there is a new life in the master bedroom. Even though she isn't sure how even one so small could fit in the already filled room. Everyone that she knows who is still in town is in her room. All of the Hawthornes, Finnick, Haymitch, Brutus, Chaff, the three remaining Mellark men, Greasy Sae and her doctor. Now there is a little baby girl with dark tufts of incredibly soft baby hair, the most wondrous sea green eyes, baby pink skin with the new baby smell and all ten fingers and toes. Tiny little thing she is…Coral. Again combining the best of both of them. The Sea King and his Little Flower. For one so little her full name is a bit long: Coral Bow Everdeen O'dair. Uncle Gale deciding that Bow is a more fitting name calls the little one that. While Grandpop Haymitch decides that Sweetpea, after her mother's Sweetheart, is a more fitting name.

She is born nine weeks early, but just like her mother she is a fighter. The doctor stayed for two days running all sorts of test in the hovercraft's medical facility, only to determine that she is beyond small, but healthy and stable. Hazelle teaches Katniss how to swaddle the baby, feed the baby, and change its diaper. Some skills she learned from her childhood slipped out when she was fighting in the games, being sold and fighting in a war.

Prim, Arielle, Annie and Johanna show up the day after the baby was born with all of the supplies Finnick had asked them for. Haymitch, Arielle, Hazelle, Brutus, Chaff and Sae dot over both mother and, especially, baby like any proud grandparent would. Prim, Johanna, Gale, Rory, Posy, Vick, Annie and Peeta act like excited aunts and uncles.

Effie and Cinna hurry back from the Capitol and arrive in time to get busy making custom made baby clothes since all of the clothes they bought for newborns were horrendously big and it wouldn't be civilized to put such a baby in too big of clothes. "We wouldn't want the child to start off on the wrong foot?" Effie argued to a house full of people who had all worn too big, hand-me down clothes at one point or another during their childhoods. But Effie being Effie they let the good intentioned insult slide.

This baby welcomes in a new generation of children into Panem. A generation that won't be scared to turn twelve and who may not always have to fight to survive. Children who can finally be just that; children.

Three months after Coral was born, Finnick proposed, really proposed- officially- to Katniss. Two days later they performed Finnick's twist on the two Districts' weddings.

They sat in front of the fireplace and a government official, both wearing white even though no one would ever think of them pure again. Finnick wore a linen suite and Katniss wore a long silken dress with three quarter sleeves, a square neck and a wide golden ribbon wrapped under her bust. She let her hair fall in the natural waves and curls and Prim and Annie adorned her head with a golden dandelion wreath they made.

The couple kneeled on the floor and a wedding net that had been passed down from generation to generation in Finnick's family was placed over the couple. Arielle spoke of the symbols used in the wedding ceremony. The net that binds them together in this life and the next. The salt water giving new life and healing all wounds. The anchor rings to show love's never ending circle and the anchor it gives when the waters of life rocks your ship.

With the net still over them they toast the bread Peeta had made. A hearty bread with nuts, fruits, seeds and vegetables in it. Peeta explained that the bread, like love, nourishes the body and keeps it a live and that toasting it is to permanently change your life, your heart, because it can no longer belong to anyone else, it can never go back to being just bread it will forever be toast.

Finnick and Katniss feed each other the bread and kiss. Finnick knowing Katniss isn't one to share her feelings with all of those around her in such a way opted out of the traditional personal vows that both ceremonies call for and instead let the telling of the symbols be enough of a vow. A vow to always love each other. Katniss was relieved by this, she wouldn't have gone through with it if it meant having to share how deeply she cares for Finnick in front of other, and she just can't not in words.

The large family, even if it is twisted and not many are what the law would call family, eat, celebrate and dance the night away with the new couple. Arielle took the baby home with her for a few nights to give the new parents some much needed rest and alone time.

Once the last guest left, Finnick carried his still too thin bride up the stairs and slowly undressed her from her wedding garbs while she undressed him. The soft sensual kisses turned into heated passionate one. The gentle caresses turned into ravenous grasps as they clung to one another in pleasure and wanting.

They had not been intimate since before Coral was born. Giving Katniss time to heal and then wanting to wait until they were married to make it mean something more. For Katniss it felt almost like the first time all over again. She is sure the doctor sewed her up tight on purpose, but it was a welcome pain. One that she was actually excited to share with Finnick. Her first time, though she loved Gale, was not one of being _in_ love. This time, this pain so much like her virginity being taken away, was being done while _in_ love. Katniss and Finnick both cried in their pleasure and love of one another because neither ever imagined that they, of all people, would be here, in this place, happy and free.

**Thanks so very much for reading! Please review!**


	23. Chapter 23

Dear Readers,

The epilogue is at the bottom, it is half-assed crap, but it's there. I hate doing things half-assed, but if you read this note then you will understand.

Due to the nature of fan fiction it is normal for people to be inspired by other's ideas and use similar themes and plots, even using the same names.

However…

It is not okay to plagiarize. I have come across a story that's first chapter has a plagiarism match of 95% to this story, that goes far beyond the realm of coincidence. I find the idea of plagiarism to be abhorrent and have come to the conclusion that I will not be posting anymore fan fiction for the time being as, for me, plagiarism at that amount is not acceptable.

I want to thank all of the people who read this story, alerted it, favorite it and reviewed it. It has given me such great joy and courage to actual write an original book. Every time I got an e-mail letting me know of alerts, favorites and reviews it was like Christmas morning for me.

To answer a question I received on stories with similar themes within the victors as a family... I think Howlynn does a wonderful job at this. I love all of her stories and found the victor relations aspect of her stories to be great, at times dark, but great.

Now on to my very short, very half-assed epilogue- as I do not feel the need to waste time writing a whole epilogue just to have it plagiarized.

Epilogue

Katniss, Finnick, Coral and Junior (Their son who is four years younger than Coral) live happily ever after in their dysfunction, what else would you expect from two ex-whores/murderers. They spend half their year in Twelve and half in Four.

Gale and Johanna never officially married, but have three boys, who are just like both of their parents reaking havoc wherever they go, and live across the street from Katniss and Finnick. They spend their time following around the aforementioned friends.

Cinna and Effie married and had one child who is a terrible combination of the two….he is the male version of Effie. They spend most of their time in the Capitol but make frequent trips back to Twelve.

Brutus and Hazelle married despite Gale's very loud and ignored objections.

Prim and Rory married. As promised, Rory did not touch Prim until their wedding night for fear of the bow toting Gale and Katniss, the ax wielding Johanna, the trident thrusting Finnick and of course the threat of cleaning Haymitch's house again.

Peeta and Annie move to Four where Peeta opened a bakery and Annie became a jewelry maker.

Arielle spends most of her time in Four but comes back to Twelve from time to time.

Haymitch and Chaff spend the rest of their lives contentedly in the bottom of a bottle, only coming up for air when necessary.

The group remains a complete, happy, dysfunctional family and nobody knows who is actually blood related anymore and who is just some pervert who may have slept with your mother, father, aunts and uncles. At this point it really doesn't matter as they are, above all things, family and family, true family, will sacrifice life and limb for you.


End file.
